hsslilly-blog

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things they should teach baseball players as soon as they go pro:

how to manage your money so you aren't broke at 40

sometimes your soulmate is a man

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on the highways in dallas. i saw a super beat up car, thought “gore?? of my comfort character??” and then immediately opened letterboxd and changed my rating of crash 1996 from a 3.5 to a 4.5

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okay so i only have an exam tomorrow and #THEN i won’t have to worry about anything else this term. #mysummerbreak #mywinter #mybackhurts

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i'm freeeeeeeeeeeee

i'm writing my internship report right. and like DO NOT GO INTO CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGY. WORST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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im not a nepotism hire if my dad is weird with me -> claire

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sandy liang heart locket hair clips

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i'm writing my internship report right. and like DO NOT GO INTO CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGY. WORST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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#WHATEVER

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sebastian looks just like the onceler

dude

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dude

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FIRST step to enjoying any media is getting attached to the character whose suicidal tendencies are the most obvious

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wesposting (37yo): fee now make your dad play roblox

wesposting: fee make him play roblox

wesposting: fee can you flick your dad

wesposting: fee get your dad on roblox

wesposting: titanic sinking 2038 remake play it

wesposting: he’ll like it

wesposting just subscribed with twitch prime

wesposting: fee can you scream really loud

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it’s so funny that fee is like 14 and streaming on twitch. like old af me logging into twitch to watch my favourite streamer 14 year old fee hunt

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happy fathers day to hunt who gets to be tortured by two other people now or whatever

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but my father; my beloved and most wretched father?

on your side - the last dinner party // not even i could remember it // 2232 santa barbara street // right between father and mother // literature, culture and society - andrew milner // flowers in the attic: the origin - declan o'dwyer & robin sheppard // 'unimaginable sensations' - jenni diplacidi // deeper and deeper - madonna // flowers in the attic: the origin - declan o'dwyer & robin sheppard // 2232 santa barbara street // twin peaks: fire walk with me - david lynch // house of the dragon // mathilda - mary shelley // claribel is my daughter // daddy issues - katherine angel // photobooth // flowers in the attic: the origin - declan o'dwyer & robin sheppard // seventeen - marina // not even i could remember it // shadow of a doubt - alfred hitchcock // literature, culture and society - andrew milner // on the hunt // unknown // the kiss - kathryn harrison

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“Until I met Shelley I [could?] justly say that he was my God—and I remember many childish instances of the [ex]cess of attachment I bore for him.”

This is the second piece for Claire’s childhood. She’s around 17 here, given she's already blonde. For her mother, I chose ballet because I think it's representative of the wounds she (Christine) passed on to Claire. For her father, I chose himself.

Words are from A Thousand Acres, by Jane Smiley, while reference for the drawing was The Fortune Hunter, by J.X. Leyendecker. Excerpt is from the footnotes of Mathilda by Mary Shelley.

I mentioned Claire's father steps in and takes her out of ballet after she gets injured.

From this point on, her father was everything to her. Claire gets ecstatic that he was finally giving her some attention. He will love her. This is when Claire takes a break from her (very) intense schedule of dance + theatre classes and, instead, intensifies her academic education. This... interference strains (even further) Claire's parents' marriage, and from this point on she becomes a pawn in their relationship. Father and Mother use Claire for their own interests, but he's much better at it than she is. Actually, put bluntly: Claire takes her mother's place. So it's Claire accompanying her father to his fancy events, and it's Claire going to church with him, and it's Claire travelling to Europe with him. Christine stays at home. There's a lot of enmeshment and boundary blurring here.

I know yesterday's and today's posts were rather sad, and my intention is not to make a melodrama, but I think these are things I'd never really written about and I thought I'd use the opportunity to explore it better. I think this is all very important to understand decisions Claire makes as an adult, the situations she puts herself in, and the way she sees the world. Tomorrow's post is a happier one! 🦋