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Mind Over Marriage
‘Marriage’ - Every 20 something guys and girls prefer to stay away from even discussing this topic. Not their fault really!. Marriage is such celebrated word in India that youngsters are skepticalabout tying the knot to soon. So what really has gone wrong with the idea which is suppose to bring two individuals together for life?
I would like to talk about from a girl’s point of view first. For a women being the chirpy bird at her own home gives a relaxing feeling, living life without inhibitions is what makes her life comfortable there. Then enters some random relative creating conspiracy along with your parents to get this free spirited youngster married soon. You can still choose your neighbors, but relatives no choice.. ahh you are born to let them interfere in your life. So marriage is the favorite topic of discussion among 40-50 year-olds in the house.
what makes the young minds think otherwise is the fear that they will be abide to follow certain rules after marriage, restrictions imposed would hamper their social life..it’s not true completely..
Before you choose your partner get to know yourself first. Because being tall, handsome and funny is not going to fuel the train the marriage for long. You need to know what experiences you will want to share with your partner, it could be as silly as trying bungee jumping first time or joining a cookery class together. Your passions may vary but doing things with a partner gives a sense of warmth. In the process you are creating beautiful memories.. you both might have bruised your legs trying the trekking stunt .. but the time spent is more valuable.
But Indian parents should take a lesson in arranging marriages also. What to they actually see in a prospective girl or boy? Education. Job. House. Car. Looks. Thats it ? Where is the real picture of compatability. Sorry ‘compatability’ word did not exist in our parents’ time. But now it’s all about mutual friends and mutual interests
What really matters is the conversations you have with each other. Sharing routine experience with each other is still a conversation. Don’t forget to keep appreciating each other(not just through facebook likes and comments, but in real life)
Yes, there will be dark times once you start living with a new individual because life is not a fairly tale and people have preferences.What men and women need to understand is that it’s’ okay to not like a person till the age 30 or even after. It’s perfectly fine to say ‘NO’ to marriage. It is alright to not go for exotic location for honeymoon.Facebook likes do not decide your happiness factor. Grow as an individual. Make friends with real world experiences- travel, sing, dance, cook, climb a mountain...there are so many places still undiscovered by YOU! And who knows may be you will find your mate there. Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans.
Even if things don’t go well, relax. People don’t conquer anything by following others..Listen to your mind..Do what seems right to you. If it does not turn out right it’s still an experience.
The ultimate luxury is PEACE, strive hard to get that and rest is sorted.
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