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hwashotcheeto · 34 minutes
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Awwww, thank you so much. 😭
I return the hug to you. 💜💜💜
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hwashotcheeto · 34 minutes
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Hello, you don’t know me…I tend to lurk and read your posts (I’m 20 turning 21 soon so🤷🏾‍♀️) but I saw your post where you said even living is exhausting for you rn. I will say this;
As a person who secretly struggles with mental health problems it’s hard. Going into little slumps or feeling down for a while is soooo hard and I feel like people who don’t struggle don’t understand how hard it actually is. It disturbs your entire life and routine and pulling your self out of a depressive state is difficult.
Feeling alone is such a hard feeling no matter how many people in your life say that they are there. It’s hard. I said I secretly struggle because my family doesn’t know the full problem because I know they won’t understand/ won’t be understanding. My friends aren’t always super understanding either. So yeah it’s hard.
I’ve found ways to help pull myself out though and maybe me sharing some of my solutions might help you if you are open and willing to give it a chance.
Try doing old hobbies you love but haven’t had the time for. If you work, take off a day or two and have a self care day. Whatever that consists of for you. Whether it be getting you nails done or going shopping or just sitting in your room watching tv.
Something I like doing to ground myself a bit is sitting outside or opening my curtains and the window and just breathing in the air and looking at how beautiful nature is. Even the rain makes me feel at peace sometimes. But sitting and breathing in and smelling the air helps me a bit. Try don’t to think about stressful things while doing this. Think about stuff that makes you happy like a pet or something.
A good cry also helps too. But all in all, no matter how alone you feel always know there is someone rooting for you. No matter how alone you feel there is at least one person in your corner. With that one person anything is possible. Pull yourself up for YOU though. Change your mentality for YOU. There has been so many times I’ve caught myself slipping back into that hole.
Maybe this is off topic from your post but…I felt the need to share this.
I’ll label myself as 🫐(blueberry anon…ig) so you know it’s me. If you ever read this…novel I wrote😭😭. But goodl luck and you are loved from any angle you look. It might look black and grey and loney from your angle but from behind the curtain, you are loved dearly. Idk you personally but yeah…🙂
Blueberry Anon, it does mean the world that you went out of your way to type all that out for me. Thank you very much. 💜
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hwashotcheeto · 2 hours
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💜
Awww, this is so cute. 😭 I'm sorry I forgot about your ask, I didn't ignore it, I just forgot.
Thank you. 💜
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hwashotcheeto · 1 day
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𝑩𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝑭𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅'𝒔 𝑴𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 (10)
Best Friend's Mother Masterlist
Chapter: Ten
Milf!Park Seonghwa X gn!reader
Summary: Christmas has finally come. But with it, the end of Winter Break, and feelings that both you and Seonghwa are still too scared to confront.
WC: 6.3k
CW: Fluff, angst, suggestive but it cuts off
AN: I'm so sorry this took so long. I don't have much to say, other than this is more angsty than I planned, but I think it makes for a better story. I hope it's a good part one finale for you all, and you enjoy, as always. 💜
Tag List: @hyunjinsjeans @malldreamprincess @unlikelysublimekryptonite @goayeos @kittkat44 @babyxhoiz @asleepylilcat @mxnsxngie @rxnexxi @mommahwa1117 @acciocriativity @anxiousskylar @h3arteyes4mingi @jus2passtime @asjkdk @soso59love-blog @i-love-ateez @cb97s-laptop @multistanbaby
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It was December 24th, and you were awake way earlier than you wanted to be, standing in a jewelry store, looking through the glass of the display case at the many expensive, gorgeous, necklaces. 
But tomorrow was Christmas, and you needed a gift for Seonghwa, so sacrifices had to be made. 
You’d already figured out a gift for Wooyoung ages ago, you had it wrapped and ready in your guest room at the house. 
Now you were here, looking for a gift for his mother. 
You often had moments where you still couldn’t believe the life you were currently living. 
“Do you need help?” You snapped your head up to find the person who spoke to you, and your eyes found a sweet older woman, smiling at you from behind her glasses. “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you, dear.” 
“No, it’s alright,” you said back, offering back a half smile as you tried to collect yourself. “I’m just looking for a last minute gift. 
“Oh, well, what exactly are you looking for?” The older woman came closer, looking over the necklaces in the case as you were. 
At that moment, you realized that you really didn’t know what to look for. 
You had a good sense of Seonghwa’s style by now, but in terms of jewelry, you were a little stumped. In the month you’d been there, the three of you hadn’t really gone out, so none of you really “dressed up.” 
But of the things you did see, you weren’t sure what he preferred. He usually wore chains, something elegant to go with his already sophisticated outfits. 
But at the same time, you didn’t want a generic, expensive diamond necklace on a silver chain. Most necklaces looked like that, just a pretty pendant on a cheap, boring chain. 
Of course, they had their own charm, and you had a few necklaces like that yourself. But you wanted to find him something special, something as unique as he was. 
You were wishing you’d asked Wooyoung what Seonghwa would wear, but even you knew about Wooyoung’s inability to shut the fuck up. So if you did ask, you ran the risk of spoiling the surprise. 
“I don’t really know,” you mumbled, putting your hands into the pocket of your hoodie. 
“Well, maybe I can help you,” the older woman offered, giving you another sweet smile. You had to admit, in the back of your mind, you were doubtful. But you’d accept any help you could at that moment. 
You nodded, and the older woman nodded back. “So, who is it for?” 
You hesitated, even if this was the expected first question. Considering the previous day’s events, you were even more hesitant to even breathe a word of your infatuation with Seonghwa to anyone. 
So you spit out some half formed excuse that you hoped sounded believable. “For someone I’ve been seeing.” 
The older woman’s eyes lit up like stars as a big smile spread across her face. You couldn’t help but smile with her. 
“Isn’t that precious?” She looked at the display cases again before she looked back at you. “What are they like? What do they like to wear?” 
Like magic, there he was in your mind. Seonghwa, in his gorgeous dresses and outfits. Walking like a queen with the way he held himself. His gorgeous smile that lit up the world, and his bright doe eyes. 
He was everything. He was wonderful. 
“He’s very mature,” you began, not picking up on the fact that “he” was the pronoun that came out. “He dresses expensively. He’s a type that likes the finer things in life.” 
“You’re looking for something a little more expensive?” The woman teased with a little grin, but you nodded in agreement. You did have a budget, as your student loan money that you were using couldn’t all go to a Christmas present. 
But for Seonghwa, you’d do it. 
“Come with me.” The older woman began walking around to a different display case, and the necklaces here were far more ornate and expensive than the ones you were looking at. Your heart stopped when you saw the price tag on one of them.
One of these necklaces could easily pay for at least half a year of your tuition. That was intimidating, to say the very least. 
The older woman must’ve saw the color drain from your face, because she quickly leaned on the counter and spoke to you softly: “This is where I tell people to look for the piece they want, and then we usually find something more affordable that’s close to what they want.” 
Your entire body sagged with relief. 
So there you went, looking over the necklaces they had. These ones weren’t just jewels on a chain, they were much more detailed than that, more intricate. There was more color in them, more styles overall. 
As you were weighing your options, you were imagining Seonghwa in your mind, picturing how he’d look with each of them, what he’d wear with them, how it would look against his honey skin. 
A few times, you got a little too wrapped up in your fantasies and had to pull yourself back. 
You repeated the process until your eyes landed on the one. The one you could perfectly see Seonghwa wearing. 
It was a choker with a large red stone in the center, with many others around it. There were a few diamonds around it as well, but they were quite small. 
It could’ve been a crown. 
“This one?” The older woman asked, knocking you out of your thoughts and back to reality. You shook yourself and nodded, smiling. “It’s quite expensive, are you sure?” 
You looked at the price tag, and the necklace would definitely drain your bank account. 
But you wanted it. You wanted him to have it. 
“Yes,” you said, nodding. “I want that one.” 
The older woman hesitated for a moment, but then she nodded as well, and went to wrap up the choker. You watched as she took it and put it into a silk lined velvet box, laying it out carefully, as if she could feel the price of every gemstone. 
You followed her around the counter to where she was going to ring it up, trying your best to not be impatient. But the older woman couldn’t help but smile at your fidgeting and shifting around. 
Just thinking about Seonghwa wearing it, how pretty the red would look against his skin, the chains around his pretty neck-
“Please insert your card, dear,” the older woman called, still smiling brightly. 
You babbled out a “sorry” as you fumbled for your card to pay for the choker. The old woman was still smiling as you went through with the payment. 
And yes, the choker was incredibly expensive. No, it didn’t count as a student expense. 
But it was worth it for Seonghwa. 
The older woman pushed the bag across the counter to you. “There you go.” She flashed that sweet, warm smile at you again as you carefully lifted the bag off the counter. “I’m sure he’ll love it.” 
At that moment, you looked into her eyes. You looked for any deceit. Any lies. Any possible malice or potential push back. 
But there was nothing. Just light and joy. 
You smiled back and nodded as relief washed over you. “I think so too.” 
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You placed the bag underneath the Christmas tree, hiding it behind the present you got Wooyoung. Thankfully, the both of them were still asleep when you arrived back at the house. 
A stark contrast to the night before, the house was quiet, and empty. No people, no music, nothing. Just a house, full of decorations. 
But now, you were fortunate for everyone to be asleep so you could tuck your very expensive, very special present behind the others. 
But since the moment you left the store, you were having doubts. You just spent a lot of money on Seonghwa. You bought him something very special, something most people don’t gift to others unless they’ve known each other for quite some time. 
You hadn’t known Seonghwa for quite some time. In fact, most people would think you’re doing much more than you should so early on. Even you were thinking that. 
But you couldn’t deny the ache in your chest when you thought about Seonghwa. The goddamn ache, the feeling that could’ve dropped you to your knees if you weren’t careful. The ache you felt all over your body when you didn’t get the chance to even hold his hand, to hug him, to be with him. 
The crippling feeling when you thought about going back to campus and not seeing him for months. 
Maybe you were falling too soon and too hard. Maybe this wasn’t right. 
You moved to reach for the bag when you heard two doors open and close. As footsteps moved across the hardwood floor upstairs, you worked to get your jacket and shoes off as quickly and quietly as possible before the owners came downstairs. 
You closed the door to the coat closet as Yeosang and Jongho made their way down the stairs, wearing what looked like Wooyoung’s shirts and shorts, their hair messy and eyes half open. You gave them the best smile you could muster at that point, but tried to not over do it. 
“What are you doing up so early?” Jongho asked, his voice scratchy and low. Your eyes flicked up to the clock on the wall in the living room, above the TV, and it was just after seven. Would it be early if you were still on campus? No. 
But you weren’t on campus, so yes, it was early. 
But you realized you didn’t have an excuse as to why you were up so early. 
“Your guess is as good as mine,” you babbled, trying to sound as nonchalant as you could manage. To your relief, the two half awake men in front of you weren’t in the mood to interrogate you. 
“Us too,” Yeosang agreed, following Jongho into the kitchen. You did the same, getting glasses of water with them and sitting at the kitchen table. 
None of you said anything for a few moments. You three were enjoying the early morning silence, the peace, the few stray strands of sunlight peeking in through the windows and stretching across the floor. 
Eventually, Jongho broke the peaceful silence. “Do you think San and Wooyoung will be down before noon?” 
Yeosang pretended to think as he took another sip from his glass. He looked off, as if into the distance, like he was prophesying about the future. You couldn’t help but laugh. The sound made Yeosang smile. 
“No, I think they’ll be there until we go find them,” he concluded, finishing the rest of his water afterwards. You nodded in agreement, taking another sip from your glass. 
“I expected the same from you.” Jongho looked at you over the rim of his glass as he sipped his water. You looked down as your face began to burn. You didn’t have an answer to that, so you kept quiet. But you knew your friends wouldn’t let you off easy. 
Yeosang continued the conversation as he set his glass down in front of himself. “Yeah, it is a little weird that you’re awake so early, fully dressed, standing by the front door.” 
Both men were looking at you now as you stared down at the table, your face burning like the sun, the heat pulsing in waves. 
It’s not that you were worried that they’d spoil the surprise. You were more afraid of their opinions and judgements of the gift you got. You could handle the jokes and even fire back at them, and you welcomed the banter about the relationship you’d found yourself in. 
But you were already beginning to have second thoughts about the expensive present sitting across the house, tucked away under the tree, hidden away from sight because you were embarrassed. 
It was everything you were afraid of. Falling too hard too fast, committing to something larger than yourself, something you very well might not be ready for. 
“Hey,” Jongho called, waving his hand close to your face. “You kinda spaced there, you okay?” 
You blinked a few times, like you were rebooting yourself, and smiled as best you could. “Yeah, sorry, I’m good.” 
“Are you sure?” Yeosang countered. Their slightly amused faces turned to ones of concern, their eyebrows down. They weren’t sure what exactly was in your head, but they knew it wasn’t nothing, like you were about to tell them it was. 
And you knew they would push. But you didn’t want to vent all of your worries and fears and poor life choices at seven in the morning, especially when they didn’t know the full extent of the month’s events. 
Thankfully, you had your out, as Wooyoung came down the stairs with San close behind. They both looked like they’d skipped the waking up part of waking up, with fluttering mostly closed eyes and their hair the best example of a “rat’s nest.” 
Yeosang and Jongho looked up at them as they came into the kitchen, sliding their feet across the floor, hardly picking them up. 
“Good morning, sunshine,” you said cheerfully, trying to steer the conversation to the two zombie looking men that strode in. The two men at the table, to your relief, joined you in teasing the others. 
“The year hasn’t changed yet, just for reference,” Jongho threw out. Wooyoung rolled his eyes as he continued past the table to the cabinet to get himself and San a drink. 
San followed him, stopping when he did, wrapping his arms around Wooyoung’s waist from behind and laying his head on the younger’s shoulder. 
With the heat off you, you breathed a small sigh of relief. You knew this wouldn’t be the last of the conversation, but that would be a problem for future you to handle. 
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Seonghwa didn’t wake up until an hour after San and Wooyoung had. That was to be expected, after all the party planning and hosting he’d done the day prior. Not to mention, the emotional distress was quite draining. 
Wooyoung helped him with breakfast, and you all ate with minimal conversation, of which you were grateful for. The less you spoke, the less chances you had to expose or incriminate yourself. 
The rest of the morning was mostly slow and quiet. You were all still recovering and resting from the previous day, and dreading the end of Winter Break as a whole. 
Classes started again in the second week of January, but you and Wooyoung had agreed to be back on campus by January 1st. 
If you weren’t counting Christmas Eve, the day you were thinking all of this, you had only one week left. Seven more days until you had to leave. 
It didn’t help that Seonghwa was being particularly clingy that day. He sat next to you at breakfast, he was holding your hand, he was giving you little kisses. 
He hugged you from behind as you were helping with the dishes, holding you tight while his body pressed into yours. 
He wordlessly demanded cuddles from you when everyone dispersed after breakfast. He pulled you onto the couch and held you tight, almost falling right back asleep when he did. 
You didn’t think, or really even wanted to, ask why Seonghwa was so attached to you that day. You told yourself it was because he was tired. Or maybe he realized you would be leaving in a week too.  
Whatever it was, you were conflicted. 
You couldn’t stop thinking as you laid in Seonghwa’s arms, your head on his chest. You wanted to relax into his warmth and safety and let the tension melt off your body. 
But you kept thinking of that goddamn choker. The choker you were so proud of finding, that you gladly spent so much money on, the choker that you knew would look amazing on him. 
It was stuck in your head because you didn’t know if you were actually going to give it to him or not. 
Maybe you’d just take it back to campus with you and save it for another time. Maybe you’d return it altogether. You’d just sit with Wooyoung as Seonghwa opened the Lego sets Wooyoung said you both could take credit for. 
Maybe that was the safer option. Maybe that was the less crazy option. 
But as you began to accept that conclusion and make peace with it, the ache was back. 
As you listened to Seonghwa’s steady heartbeat, feeling his hand run up and down your back, the ache returned with a burning passion. Your breathing grew labored, like the ache was genuinely squeezing your heart and forcing the air out of your lungs. 
Tears welled in your eyes as you imagined shoving the choker’s bag into your own and taking it back to campus with you. The ache spread to your arms and legs as you thought about never presenting the gift to him, and simply just watching him open the presents Wooyoung bought. 
Your whole body hurt. It felt like a pulsing, squeezing pain, and you couldn’t escape it. You couldn’t stop the tears from running down your face. 
You’d fallen in too deep. You fell too hard, too fast. 
Everything you’d been afraid of had happened exactly as you thought it would. 
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By the time your friends left, the sky was already darkening again. As much as you all would’ve loved for them to stay, they had families to go home to as well. 
You wondered how long it would be before San and Wooyoung were consistently going to each other’s family events. Or even hosting their own. 
But it was hours since then, and you were sitting back on the couch with Seonghwa and Wooyoung. Seonghwa sat between the two of you, his arm around your shoulders, holding you tight against him, with Wooyoung sitting the same way. 
But Wooyoung was stretched across most of the couch and his arms were dramatically thrown around Seonghwa, like he was a figure in a painting you’d find in an old museum. 
You three had agreed to get snacks and drinks and watch Christmas movies until midnight, when you could open your gifts for each other. 
But the movies kept getting interrupted by Wooyoung being impatient, general commentary, and before you all knew it, you were all talking again with the movies long forgotten.
In a way, you preferred this. The more time you spent talking, the less time you had to think about the impending time of your decision. But as the clock ticked down, as midnight drew closer, your efforts were in vain. 
All you could think of was that goddamn choker. The repeated question of “will you, won’t you” flashing across your eyes like some kind of horror montage. 
You started to feel sick. Your stomach was churning, your head felt light. You were pretty sure you were beginning to turn green. All over a fucking choker. 
Midnight drew ever closer, and the dread in your stomach intensified and grew with every second that ticked by. Your eyes kept jumping back and forth, from the clock on the wall to the TV and back again. 
You nearly jumped out of your skin when Wooyoung sat up and yelled, “It’s Christmas!” 
Your hands were slightly shaking as Wooyoung got up from the couch and pulled you and Seonghwa along, dragging you across the room to kneel down by the Christmas tree. 
The warm lights of the tree that once brought you comfort now nearly made you vomit. 
You swallowed it back as you settled next to the tree on the hardwood floor, pushing the bag with the choker further back into the corner. Your wrapped your arm around your back in an effort to do so as subtly as possible. 
Seonghwa also came to sit on the floor in front of the tree between you and Wooyoung, but only after he’d gotten a trash bag to put the discarded wrapping paper in. Wooyoung happily shoved a box towards Seonghwa, a huge smile stretched across his face. 
“We got this one for you!” He dropped the present in Seonghwa’s lap as he reached over to grab the other boxes that had Seonghwa’s name on the tag. “And these ones too.” 
Seonghwa pouted, but then smiled warmly at his son. Oh, how ethereal he looked under the light of the Christmas tree, delicately highlighting his warm skin and putting sparkles in his eyes. 
You shook your head and came back to the present as Seonghwa began to tear the wrapping paper off the box in his lap. His smile grew bigger the more he revealed the box, and finally laughed in excitement. 
“Oh, nae sarang,” Seonghwa sighed, putting the wrapping paper in the trash bag. “This is so sweet of you, thank you.” 
Wooyoung was absolutely beaming, his smile outshining the tree beside him. His eyes flicked over to you, and you couldn’t help but share his smile. Seonghwa looked at you too, and your heart fluttered at the genuine gratitude in them. 
“Thank you too, jagiya.” 
You just nodded, your heart cracking a little. 
But you happily watched Seonghwa tear open the rest of the boxes. His eyes lit up every time, laughing in pure joy at the brand new expensive Lego sets. You nodded every time he said thank you, but guilt pulled at your heart knowing you didn’t actually contribute in any way. 
But Wooyoung didn’t seem to mind. He was just as happy seeing Seonghwa open the presents, as if he was the one receiving them instead of giving them out. 
You were truly the luckiest person to have Wooyoung. 
After Seonghwa had finished unwrapping the Lego boxes, he stacked them up and put them aside, and then pulled Wooyoung into a tight hug. 
“Thank you, nae sarang,” he said softly, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. 
“You’re welcome, Eomma,” Wooyoung whispered, squeezing Seonghwa tighter. 
Your heart cracked again. 
Wooyoung pulled away from Seonghwa and reached back under the tree for a bag. It looked fairly inconspicuous, just a regular white bag with white tissue paper sticking out the top. But in your experience with Wooyoung, quiet and boring was always suspicious. 
Seeing your hesitation, Wooyoung sighed and rolled his eyes. “It’s not a bomb, don’t look at it like that,” he whined. “Just open it.” 
“It’s a bag, it’s already open,” you teased, to which Wooyoung groaned and rolled his head back. Both you and Seonghwa let out a soft giggle. 
“Just open it, please!” 
With another giggle, you pulled the tissue paper aside and looked into the bag, seeing a bundle wrapped in more tissue paper. You carefully pulled it out and pulled the paper off to reveal the gift. 
“Wooyoung,” you breathed as you looked over the expensive outfit in your hands. The logo on the tag was what you saw first, your head shooting up to look at him in bewilderment. “What is this?” 
“Clothes, dummy,” he answered with his award winning smile again. “Now you don’t have to borrow my clothes for events.” 
You know his comment was a joke, but his words went straight to your heart. You hadn’t asked for this, Hell, you didn’t even think about buying it for yourself. 
But you finally had a nice outfit for events, or parties. 
Or maybe even future restaurant dates. 
“Thank you.” You carefully folded the clothes back up, as if they’d unravel in your hands, and laid them back in the bag. 
“You don’t have to thank me, it was a necessity.” 
You rolled your eyes, to which Wooyoung just smiled. You couldn’t stop yourself from doing the same. 
“Is it my turn now?” Seonghwa asked as you put the bag aside. Your eyes caught a glimpse of your own gift behind the tree again. 
“Sure,” you breathed, your lungs shrinking. Wooyoung eagerly reached under the tree and grabbed a box, wrapped in gold wrapping paper, with his name written on it in Hangul. 
He wasted no time in shredding the paper, almost reminiscent of a cat, and revealed a large, expensive laptop. Wooyoung just stared at it for a few moments with his jaw hanging open, his eyes the size of dinner plates. 
“Eomma,” he whispered, then looked up at Seonghwa. “When I said I wanted a new one, I wasn’t serious,” he started to explain, but Seonghwa held up his hand to stop him. 
“I don’t care, I wanted to get it for you. And I think college would be a little difficult with a broken laptop.” 
You held back a giggle remembering the moment Wooyoung dramatically wailed about how he accidentally knocked his previous laptop off a table and onto the linoleum floor of the classroom. 
Wooyoung just stared at Seonghwa for a few moments, like he was about to tell his son it was all a joke. But when Seonghwa just smiled at him, in the warm mom way, Wooyoung smiled too and hugged the box. 
“Thank you.” 
“You’re welcome, nae sarang.” 
Wooyoung set the box aside carefully, slowly setting it down beside him, making sure it would be safe before he turned to you and Seonghwa. 
You looked up at Seonghwa, and he smiled at you warmly before he reached over and squeezed your hand. “Your present comes later.” 
It took every ounce of strength to not burst into tears right then and there. You just mustered up the best smile you could and nodded. There was no teasing look in Seonghwa’s eyes, no allusion to more. Just his warm smile and bright eyes. 
“Eomma, I didn’t need to know that,” Wooyoung groaned dramatically, speaking loudly as he flung himself back to lay on the floor. You rolled your eyes as Seonghwa pulled his hand away and looked back at Wooyoung. 
“It’s not like that,” he began, but Wooyoung just whined again. 
“If you’re gonna be like that, then I won’t give you your present,” you added as you pulled out a large, black bag from under the tree, with black wrapping paper sticking out of it. 
Wooyoung shot up and looked at you, and then at the bag, then back again in confusion. His brows went down as he opened his mouth to question you, but you just slid the bag across the floor to him. 
“I’ve had them hidden for months,” you explained as wooyoung grabbed the bag.
“Them?”
“Yes, them, now go look!” 
Wooyoung looked at the bag again, this time with a look of concern instead of confusion, like something was about to jump out at him. He studied the still bag for a few more moments before he finally pulled out the tissue paper and looked inside. 
And he pulled out two small plushies: A black cat and a red fox. 
Wooyoung gasped as he pulled them out, then hugged them tightly. “You remembered!” He exclaimed as he looked at them again, turning them over and admiring all the little details. 
Months prior, Wooyoung wouldn’t stop talking about these plushies he wanted. He had a collection going, and he needed those two to complete it, but he never had a chance to get them. 
So one night, you did. You ordered them online and hid them in your dorm for months, waiting for the day you could’ve given it to Wooyoung. 
And here you were, on Christmas Day, finally seeing his eyes light up like stars as he looked at them both, hugging them like they were his children. 
The sight helped alleviate some of the tension in your chest. 
“Thank you,” he finally said to you as he looked up. You smiled, and this time, it was genuine. 
“You’re welcome.” 
Meanwhile, Seonghwa was smiling just as brightly. The mom smile you adored, the softness in his eyes as he looked at you both with unending fondness. 
It cracked your heart all over again. 
With all your presents exchanged, Seonghwa and Wooyoung collected their gifts and went to bring them to their rooms. 
You did the same, but hid the choker bag in the gift bag Wooyoung gave you, and ran to your room to hide it there. 
How ridiculous this all was. You bought the choker for Seonghwa, you brought it home, you’d imagined how beautiful he’d look with it. You’d walked out of that store knowing he’d gratefully accept the gift, and you were excited to see him wear it. 
But how could you give someone like him something like this? This was far too much money for someone you haven’t known for nearly enough time. 
But you bought it because of the goddamn pain in your chest. The suffocating, choking ache that grew ever stronger every day. It invaded every part of your body, it was in your blood and bones. Even if you wanted to smother it and shove it away, it would take forever. 
You knew what it was. You knew why it was there. 
But you didn’t have the courage to say it. Which is why the choker was getting shoved in the duffle bag and into the closet as you fought back tears. 
Maybe you’d give it to Seonghwa another day. Maybe as a birthday present, whenever that was. 
But not now. You couldn’t do it now. 
As you wiped the tears from your eyes, there was a gentle knock at the door before it opened a little. 
“May I come in?” It was Seonghwa, you knew it was him before he even spoke. 
You nodded, as if he could see that, as you said “yes” and sat down on the bed. Seonghwa came into the room and carefully shut the door behind him before he came to sit down next to you. 
In his hand was a square, navy, velvet box, about the side of a small plate. He held it out to you with a warm smile that would have melted the coldest of hearts. You took the box from him carefully, like it would disappear at any second, and were surprised when it had a little weight to it. 
“It’s okay,” he said softly when you hesitated, putting one of his hands over yours. You looked up and met his big, brown eyes again. “It’s all yours, jagiya.” 
You just nodded, because you couldn't think of anything meaningful to say as your eyes fell back down to the box in your hands. 
You shoved away the guilt that stirred in your gut as you slowly opened the velvet case, and tears welled in your eyes all over again. 
It’s like Seonghwa knew you were buying him a choker earlier, and that you wanted something with more detail and intricacies. 
A necklace, but there were gemstones all up the chain with a larger one hanging from the bottom. The gemstones on the chain were small and simple. not trying to be in the way, but just to elevate the chain. 
The larger, square cut gemstone that hung from the ornate chain was meant to be in the way. It wasn’t obnoxiously large, no, it was just perfect. 
Everything was perfect. You were blinking back tears, it was so perfect. 
“Seonghwa, this is beautiful,” you whispered, your throat closing up. You ran your fingers over the gemstones, almost like you needed to touch it to see if it was real. 
Seonghwa was beaming, lighting up the whole room with his smile as he watched you admire the necklace. “You said you wanted something to show off.” 
“And I will.” You carefully lifted the necklace out of the box, and as you were going to put it on, Seonghwa stopped you and reached up to take it. 
“May I?” Two simple words. Words that were very small and insignificant to anyone else. 
But this moment felt like much more than just putting on a necklace. 
It almost felt sacred. Intimate. Like a ceremony. 
You nodded and gave the necklace to Seonghwa. He moved closer and wrapped it around your neck, reaching over your shoulder to clasp it behind your neck. You felt your face burn at how close he was, with his arms around you, his body enveloping yours. 
But he pulled back just a few seconds later to admire how the beautiful piece sat against your skin. Seonghwa’s eyes lit up like stars as his smile spread across his whole face again. “I knew it was perfect,” he said softly as he ran his fingers down the chain. 
If your heart could beat any harder, the large stone on the necklace would’ve started shaking. It was a bizarre feeling, to be so guilty and torn up, but so elated, and desire the man before you. 
And when Seonghwa’s eyes flicked up to yours, it’s as if he could see it all. Every tear, every smile, eerie second guess you’d ever had. Like he could see the entire month of December replaying in your eyes in those few seconds. 
There were no other words spoken as Seonghwa leaned close and pressed his lips to yours. It was a soft kiss, feather light. Loving. 
When Seonghwa laid you down on your back, your body turned to putty in his hands. Your limbs were growing weak as you wrapped them around his body. You wanted him as close as close could be, wanted to remember his taste, every soft moan as he breathed his life into every kiss, the touch of his hands on every part of your body. 
You wanted it all. And Seonghwa was more than happy to provide. 
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The first day of the new year had come and gone. The thirty one days of December went by faster than they had in previous years. 
But as you and Wooyoung loaded your bags back up into his car, you were anything but joyful. 
“We’ll visit again during Spring Break,” he reassured you as he closed the trunk. “And it’s not like you don’t have his number, you can still talk to him.” 
Wooyoung was trying his best to reassure you, but his face fell when he realized nothing was working. Everything he was telling you, you already knew it. Obviously you’d see Seonghwa again, and you’d probably be texting him at least once every few days, if not every day. 
The world was not ending. This blissful period did, but it wasn’t the end of everything. You’d be back, you’d see Seonghwa again. 
But the months between January 1st and Spring Break would be difficult after the month you’d just lived through. 
It felt juvenile. You were a grown adult in college, working towards a degree to hopefully secure a good career and have a comfortable life. You had classes to worry about, not your boyfriend who’s double your age. 
But he wouldn’t ever leave your head. You knew in your head that when you went back to class, he’d probably be there in the back of your head. 
An effort in mental gymnastics is what these next few months would hold. 
Wooyoung brought you back up to the house for your final goodbyes. Seonghwa was standing in the open doorway, dressed in a cream knitted sweater with black sweatpants. Normally, he was dressed up in some way, even if it was a pajama set. Today, he hadn’t bothered with fashion. 
Wooyoung hugged him first, squeezed him so tight, he lifted Seonghwa off the floor. For the first time that morning, you smiled as they both laughed. The noise of surprise and protest Seonghwa let out just made Wooyoung hoist him up more, until all three of you were laughing. 
“How could you put your poor eomma through such things?” Seonghwa asked in a perfectly dramatic voice as he made a show of fixing his hair and sweater. 
“As if you’re any better,” Wooyoung teased. Seonghwa just smiled and kissed his head, to which Wooyoung reciprocated with a cheek kiss. 
“Be safe, nae sarang.” 
“I will, Eomma.” 
They exchanged an “I love you” before Wooyoung walked away, and gave you a nod before he went to sit in the car to wait. 
It was like a movie scene. The sun was setting, the snow was falling. The sunset colors illuminated your face as Seonghwa gave you a half hearted smile. 
You wordlessly hugged him tightly, and he instantly returned the hug. You two stayed there in that hug, silently clinging onto each other like it would be the last time. 
It wouldn’t be the last time. Far from it. 
But you both found something that December. You found someone. And it was so special, you couldn’t bear to lose it. 
As you pulled back to look up at him, the little voice was in your head again. Telling you that you were taking this too seriously, that you shouldn’t have been so upset, that this wasn’t a big deal. 
The voice disappeared as Seonghwa pulled you into another loving kiss. The idea that this was a movie scene popped back into your head as he held your cheek and kept you close. 
You could've sworn you heard your heart break when you both pulled away. 
“Be safe,” Seonghwa softly said onto your lips. You nodded as you painstakingly pulled out of his arms. 
“I will. You too.” 
Seonghwa gave you another small smile. His eyes flicked down to the necklace that you still wore. You’d worn it every day since the night he gave it to you, and kept it in it’s case every night. 
You smiled back before you forced yourself to walk back to Wooyoung’s car. Seonghwa watched from the doorway until Wooyoung’s car disappeared, and he could no longer hear it. 
Wooyoung reached over the center console and held your hand, lacing his fingers with yours and squeezing. He didn’t need to say anything, no words needed to be said. 
But as you were swallowing back the tightness in your throat and blinking back tears, the comfort felt good. The firm squeeze was what you needed, as you both were headed back to campus, unsure of where life was going to bring you both next.
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Thank you for reading! Please reblog if you enjoyed! 💜
This is a work of fiction written by me. This does not represent the idol(s) in any way. Any re-upload is not allowed and will be reported.
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hwashotcheeto · 3 days
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This is a vent post that will probably get deleted, but it's still important to get it out.
I've been genuinely considering going inactive for quite some time now.
Everything in my life has been so incredibly stressful. Fuck, even living right now is exhausting.
It's hard to struggle to even stay alive. It's hard to tell yourself to keep living. It's so goddamn hard to stay alive, when everything hurts, and you feel so alone despite the friends and family you have, when nothing makes you happy.
It's so hard. It's so fucking hard.
I can't even think about writing right now. I'm no where near well enough to be able to write anything.
It's still going to be a while before I publish what I've promised, but I'm not taking on any new projects. I'm finishing what I have.
And after...who knows.
I really don't know. But I'm not going to disappear without saying anything.
We'll see what the future holds.
For those of you who've still supported me, thank you. It means everything and more. You're wonderful. 💜
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hwashotcheeto · 4 days
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What do you mean it's already April 23rd???
What the FUCK
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hwashotcheeto · 5 days
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ur welcome boo! Your "Premium Access" fic for Hwa was 🤌🏻🤌🏻🔥🔥
had me (s)creaming for a good minute, this man just needs to rail us now doesnt he, Cheeto? 🔥❤️
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Ahhh, Guerilla Seonghwa, my beloved. 😍
And thank you lovely, I'm quite proud of that fic. I had a lot of fun writing it, I'm glad you enjoyed it. 💜
And oh dear lord, the things I'd give for just one chance to sign an NDA for this man.
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hwashotcheeto · 5 days
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The realistic ending.
No seriously this was so funny I love it-
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BFF!Ateez reacts to you accidentally sending a risqué photo
Warnings: suicidal ideation as a ✨️joke✨️, lots of all caps yelling. If you're looking for a best friend to lovers arc, this is not it.
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Ateez Masterlist
Bonus: my recent fave reaction image
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hwashotcheeto · 6 days
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❤️❤️❤️
Awww, thank you for the hearts, lovely. 🥰 I give them to you as well.
💜💜💜
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hwashotcheeto · 7 days
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I was gonna have an explanation of how I got to this point, but I decided to just tell you that I found this Mingi on Pinterest and the comparison clicked when I saw him.
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Do with this knowledge what you will. 💜
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hwashotcheeto · 7 days
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Park Seonghwa, the man you are.
(That eyebrow quirk is gonna put me in comatose)
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Coachella 2024 P.2 - Ateez: Seonghwa
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hwashotcheeto · 7 days
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Yep, this is definitely a favorite. 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 Whewww, this is GOOD
HIIII pls write a fic ab hwa's corruption kink 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩
𝙇𝙪𝙨𝙘𝙞𝙤𝙪𝙨
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Content Includes: Mommy!Hwa x sub!fem reader, 18+, nipple play, inexperienced reader, making out, reference to reader being on her period (faintly), dry humping, praise, corruption kink to the max, body worship, Seonghwa just adores you.
Word Count: 1.7 K
Seonghwa loved your tits.
It was that simple.
He wished you wore clothes that highlighted them more, lower-cut tops and dresses and he even thought you'd get the hint when he brought you expensive push-up lingerie that emphasised those gorgeous tits of yours.
But the relationship was new for you, sex was new for you, having a man who adored you and your body was new for you.
So he...begrudgingly tried to keep it slow.
But fuck, it was hard.
Especially now, seeing you lie beside him on his bed, discomfort on your face and your hands lightly grazing over your tits through the cotton of your shirt.
'Sorry Hwa, it's that time of the month for me, I won't be the most talkative today...everything just hurts'.
His hands gently stroked your hair back as he gazed upon you with nurture and care in his eyes.
'Don't be silly, I love spending time with you anyway'
His voice was husky and soft and you know he was just being caring but your libido was up and your skin was heating up, nipples hardening through the fabric- catching Seonghwa's gaze.
'Where does it hurt the most?'
He spoke as his hand gently smoothed across your stomach, his hair falling into his eyes and his dick hardening from how warm you felt under his fingers.
'Mmmm' You hummed out as your lashes fluttered, his touch soothing you.
'My tits, they always hurt the most-so sore and sensitive'.
Seonghwa's hand gently trailed up before settling his hand just between your breasts, flattening his palm out over your clothed chest as his voice darkened, his tone shifting to something more suggestive.
'I can take care of it, make you feel better'
His eyes wandered with his fingers as they slowly trailed back down your naval, teasing the skin peeking through around your hipbone.
'But first'
Your skin shivered as he trailed them up your diaphragm, the shirt pushing up and around your rib-cage.
Seonghwa's tongue peeked out through his teeth as he licked his bottom lip in desire, your bare skin providing confirmation to his licentious mind...you were in fact bra less and SO easily accessible to his teeth and tongue.
'You have to trust me'
Bare lips pressed to yours, a heated kiss, chaste but longing for more, his long hair grazing your cheeks, his hand cupping just underneath your left breast- his thumb stroking at the underside of your anticipating flesh.
'Can you do that for Mommy?'
Your eyes widened in surprise and your pulse started to race, feeling it pulse beneath your neck as you gazed back into Seonghwa's eyes, they were darkening but not quite primal yet.
The title 'Mommy' is verbal consent in it's purest form, a nurturing term of authority that satisfied both of you- something Seonghwa never imagined he liked being called and you never imagining you liked using.
Yes, Seonghwa initiates the intimacy mostly but when 'Mommy' is used- the ball is in your court and you choose if you want to take the swing.
'I trust you Mommy, make it feel better, make me feel good'
A groan of possessiveness filled the air as Seonghwa gracefully rolled himself onto you, moving his hand to brace himself as he kissed you with fever- with need.
'I'm not going to fuck you' He huskily spoke between placing kisses on your lips and down your jawline.
'Not yet- though I think about it- all the fucking time'.
'But what I have thought about even more is burying my face in these pretty tits of yours, seeing how gorgeous they would look covered in my spit and marks'.
A final sucking kiss was pressed to the hollow of your collarbone before Seonghwa rose back up on his knees, his hands bunching the t-shirt around your shoulders and leaving you entirely exposed for him.
'So are you going to put your arms up for Mommy and let me take your shirt off?'
You permitted the offer by lifting your arms above your head, arching your head so Seonghwa could seamlessly remove the shirt, swiftly removing it and carelessly placing it on the sheets.
'Are you g-going to make it even and take yours off too?'
Seonghwa's heart flipped in his chest at your harmless quip, he could feel the slight tension in your body and his affection for you grew more.
He was the first to see you like this- he knew it, both from you admitting to being a late bloomer when he first asked you out and from how sensitive you constantly were under his faintest of touch.
'Would that help you feel less nervous?'
The softness of his voice was back and a gentle smirk graced his features as the moment softened.
'It really would- and also I really like staring and touching your chest'
A blush darkened your face and Seonghwa beamed down at you as he hoped you could feel the care he had for you in his gaze.
'Okay- anything for my precious, little star'
He leaned down to press a chaste kiss to your mouth, slightly nipping your bottom lip before settling back on his knees and pulling his t-shirt over his head, his long, fluffy hair fringing his eyelashes.
'Mommy's coming back for you' He chimed in a sing-songy tone, making a low growl in his chest before ravishing your chest in quick, fast-paced kisses which led to you giggling and ruffling your hands through his hair.
'Mmmm- keep doing that'
Seonghwa's lashes fluttered as he basked in the sensation, rolling his denim-covered hips against yours as his hands gripped your sides, tilting your pelvis and causing both of you to gasp under his touch.
'Mommy loves your little noises'
His voice was muffled but becoming coarse and husky with a fever ready to burn, his teeth nipping and biting (gently) around your left areola.
'Let's see what other noises you make when Mommy does this-'
A jagged moan left your throat as Seonghwa ran his long tongue around your nipple before wrapping his lips around the bud and sucking hard.
The sensation was overwhelmingly good and every single one of his licks and nips sent sparks of electricity through your body, feeling yourself becoming more sensitive and high-strung with every motion.
Breathy whimpers left your chest as Seonghwa released your nipple with a loud 'pop' and he gazed up at you with glassy eyes, flushed cheeks, hair tousled and a sheen of saliva on his lips and chin.
'You're so sensitive to Mommy aren't you? Maybe I can make you cum just from playing with your tits huh? Think you can do that for me?'
And usually you'd doubt yourself but with how sexy Seonghwa looked on top of you, with how hard he felt against you and with the seam of his jeans rolling against your thinly-covered clit- combined with his husky voice and how sensitive your body is?
It wasn't a circumstance of if but when.
Seonghwa could feel the heat of you radiating through your fingertips on his chest and back and how nestled he felt with your thighs wrapped around his hips...
How your chest was shades of pink and red with his marks and your nipples swollen, hard and slicked from his spit and kisses-
And his heart skipped a beat with how fucked out you looked, with how far gone you were from just his tongue on your nipples and jeans on your clit.
Fuck, he wanted to ruin you, his abs flexing and body trembling as he imagined how you'd look underneath him- in this exact position as you take his cock for the very first time.
Seonghwa brushed the hair out of your eyes with his hand before kissing you passionately, feverishly as his mind wandered- not really focused on how you were out of breath or how you were struggling to keep up with his pace.
The little gasp you would make as he pushes the tip in, how your eyes would widen and thighs shake underneath him, your whimpers softened by his coos as he praises you, feeling your body stretch around him-claimed only by him.
But you weren't ready and this wasn't the right time so instead Mommy's going to settle for finishing in his underwear like a man on heat.
'Mommy's not going to last long precious' He panted in your ear, his brow furrowing as he bit his bottom lip and stifled a whimper from his mouth.
'Mmm- almost there' You whined out as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, burying your face in his neck as you felt Seonghwa hitch your thigh further up his side, rough hands pushing you against him as he quickens his pace and grinds.
'I bet you're clenching under me right now yeah? Imagining how thick and hard I'd feel inside you?'
Seonghwa was hoping the dirty talk would work in favour of your pleasure and it was- judging by your reaction and how frantic your hips moved against his.
His warm, wandering hands slid back up your side as he spoke to you, reaching back up to massage your breasts as his fingers tweaked at your nipples.
'I just know you'll take Mommy's cock so well and you'll get drunk off how it feels'
He wrapped his lips around your right nipple, still fondling your left breast with his hand as he spoke between suckles and licks.
'You'll want it all the time, want me all the time and I'll give it to you however and wherever you want it because you're my precious, little star and Mommy wants to make you see the fucking stars while you're under me, wrapped around me, consumed by me'.
And as the coil snapped and you reached your release and as Seonghwa's hips stuttered to a stop, letting out a primal groan as he finished, his body was warm, sweaty and firm above you.
You knew Mommy would keep his promise and you couldn't wait to see what type of stars he'd make you see.
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This was written for @wisejudgedragonhairdo birthday!! Happy Birthday!!!
Taglist: @scuzmunkie @marievllr-abg @umbralhelwolf @starsareseen @lino-jagiyaa @mischiefsmind @mrcarrots @junieshohoho @partywithgyu @whatsk-poppinhomies @craxy-person @hologramhoneymoon @gyuhanniescarat @staytinyinmybpack @necessiteez @wooyoungmybelovedhusband @berryberrytan @laylasbunbunny @bangchanbabygirlx @i-love-ateez @anyamaris @krishastumblernow @hexheathen @michel-angelhoe @northerngalxy @justaaveragereader @ja3hwa @lyramundana @saintfool @wolfakira @youre-alittle-taste-of-hell @silentreaderthings @daddysspecialdollyworld @abby-grace @smilefordongil @writhingwrecked
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hwashotcheeto · 8 days
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ITS HAPPENINGGGGGGG
ME AND @hwashotcheeto ARE WATCHING THE LIVESTREAM HOLY SHITTTTT WE'RE SO EXCITEDDDDDD. OUR KINGS AAAAAA
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hwashotcheeto · 8 days
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ARE WE READY FOR CHELLATEEZ PART TWO???
I am, at least, I'm SO fucking excited.
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hwashotcheeto · 8 days
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I have some spicy ass ideas that I know could turn into banger drabbles or fire fics.
But I'm not brave enough to post them. 😭
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hwashotcheeto · 9 days
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joonging
Joonging
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hwashotcheeto · 9 days
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My kitten is so photogenic.
He's gorgeous.
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But where is he, you might be asking?
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The bathtub.
The fucking bathtub.
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