hypertomboi

[hypertomboi]

Ideal work schedule:

I show up and am given a list of cognitively engaging but achievable tasks

I complete the list

I leave immedietly

[hypertomboi]

Me with my art program open

[hypertomboi]

Sheila Bawar by Fernando Tomaz for Elle Brasil Magazine June 2025

[hypertomboi]

WHEN I WAS 14 I WOULD DREAM EVERY NIGHT THAT I WAS CAPTURED TORTURED AND SLAIN BY VIETNAMESE SOLDIERS WHICH WAS WEIRD BECAUSE I HAD A REALLY GOOD AND EASY LIFE AND LIVED IN THE BURBS

[hypertomboi]

they should invent an apartment that has huge windows but is never too hot and is near everything i like and all my friends but is also quiet when i want it to be and costs zero dollars or perhaps they pay me to live in. and they save it just for me so i dont have to look for it :)

[hypertomboi]

[hypertomboi]

having ocs is so fucked .... i miss them so bad but im the guy who has to create new content. but im sleepy

[hypertomboi]

[hypertomboi]

currently running the Sweetie Pie Challenge where i dont hit anyone with a tire iron as hard as i can for seven days

[hypertomboi]

Did a brand new kind of bowling shot today

we called it the "trust the Force Luke" shot or the "through God all things are possible" shot

[hypertomboi]

Fuck you *migrates to another environment and evolves entirely new characteristics over thousands of years*

[hypertomboi]

made this a transparent gif because im in love

[hypertomboi]

Phone Wallpapers

[hypertomboi]

"Hi y'all, it's Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, here with another taste test. I'm here in 1976, and I'm gonna get some fries from Mickey D's before they changed the recipe, and then I'm gonna take 'em back to 2022, and get fries from the same McDonald's, so I can compare. Now, I've got my Nixon, uh, Ford? Carter? Era fries right here, so now I'm gonna"

*everything appears stretched and distant, and then the camera flies through space, through the sun, over millions of different Earths, past the faces of individual people in a thousand different timelines, splintered day by day, the long-dead alive once more, their varied futures lying before them. They appear to be screaming*

"annnnnd here we are, gettin' the new fries, today. I have to say, I like the old fries a bit better, bit more crisp, but Mickey D's fries are still Mickey D's fries, y'know? Anyway, I know some of you guys were freaked out at all the screaming time faces last video, but like, I'm used to 'em, and they aren't even audible to me? But y'know what is audible? That's right - Audible, use code -"

[hypertomboi]

Ah, yes, I see you’ve taken notice of the fine knight I keep dangling in a big gilded cage above my evil throne. Quite the pretty little ornament the would be savior makes, wouldn’t you agree~?

What? No, it IS a big cage. That’s- it’s the standard size for a knight’s cage I’m pretty sure. NO I’m not going to invest in 500 square feet of dungeon, it’s ONE knight! I’m pretty sure knights live in hovels in the wild anyways which is basically the same- Look, the cage is quite literally gilded. He loves the cage! He loves obediently preening in the cage! Yeah well, when you capture your own knight you can keep it in whatever size castle you want to, but this one’s mine. Especially since you’re so obviously jealous of me and my cute and awesome knight anyway.

[hypertomboi]

today I used the phrase "breasting boobily" in casual real life conversation and everyone was shocked asking how I came up with that and I had to explain it. ive been at the devil's sacrament so long that I forgot he wasn't god

[hypertomboi]

do you think that a certain genre of queer person is so obsessively weird about pride flag discourse becuase their flags fill the gaping hole in their personality where a hogwarts house used to be