i-schmeared-it-on-a-bagel
i-schmeared-it-on-a-bagel
Inedible Cheese
845 posts
Not really sure, to be honest.
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i-schmeared-it-on-a-bagel · 15 hours ago
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What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!
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i-schmeared-it-on-a-bagel · 20 hours ago
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He would fucking say that. (Said through clenched teeth, a trembling lip, and watery eyes).
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THE RASPBERRY REC ROOM
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Fanciest Feast
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I was gonna make a post that's like 'casual racism implies the existence of ranked competitive racism" but then I realized ranked competitive racism is just the U.S. presidential election
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shoutout to my homies who are deeply bizarre and have something wrong with them
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IM BACKKK WITH SOME DOODLES OF AN OLD HYPERFIXATION AWAKENED
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I forgot tumblr existed lowkey
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i really hate coming out but still want my extended family to know, so my mother took it upon herself to invent the game “guess which one of my kids is gay.”
the rules are simple.
sit down with uncle so-and-so
he says something about gay people in passing
my mom says “there’s a gay person at this table right now. guess which of my kids it is!
he looks frantically between the three of us trying to figure out if she’s joking or not and trying desperately not to offend anyone but also she won’t continue with the conversation unless he makes a guess so he has to make a guess
we all enjoy his discomfort immensely
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sorry for being indecisive, I haven’t had any prophetic dreams to guide me in a while
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you’re not a pervert for wanting to be a girl but also if you want to be a girl who is a pervert that’s cool too
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i am so happy for you and your ugly fucking boyfriend im serious
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happy pride to the boyfriend who looks like a girlfriend that mr the killers had in February of last year
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girl: "so what do you do?"
Me looking away bashfully: "I am the subject of diverse and meaningless cruelties"
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just got fired from my government job… apparently they can control the weather with space lasers now so they don’t need me to stand on a dark tower and chant in a big bellowing voice to summon clouds and winds of fear and frost
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