iamlove05

[iamlove05]

Because not all daddies call their daughter “my princess”

Happy Birthday in heaven, to the man they referred to as my dad.

To the guy who never remembered my birthday for 28 years

—or maybe he did, but never greeted me anyway.

I don’t want to sound bitter, but forgive me for not remembering anything good about you.

I know some of my cousins celebrated having a “tito” like you,

Hope I was able to see that, to somehow appreciate you.

Sad that the only memory I had with you, 

Was when I first saw you, and I remember how tight I hugged you.

But instead of feeling loved, you asked me to let you go

And so I did, and since then I never liked you.

I resented you for not even pretending that you are happy to see me.

You broke my heart on that very moment;

And I hated myself for praying to have you back, when I was little.

You’ve never been a father to me, and sad that you will never be.

You’ve taught me to learn some things the hard way.

That not everyone will love you—not even the person who contributed to your DNA.

That not because he uttered “forever”—doesn’t mean they’ll fulfill it.

And not all daddies call their daughter “princess”—sometimes they’ll just call you by your nickname.

Despite of everything I’ve been through.

I still hope you are now in heaven.

Wishing that God will let you in His Kingdom.

And by chance you are now in there,

kindly look for my “tatay kiko”,

please thank him for being the father to me,

For doing all the things that you should’ve done.

For portraying the role that you failed to play. 

[iamlove05]

I felt very tired and vague in the head.

Ernest Hemingway (via quotemadness)

[iamlove05]

Some people come into your life just to teach you how to let go.

Reyna Biddy (via wordsnquotes)

[iamlove05]

"Sana ganun kadali, na kahit ganito kabigat, bukas paggising ko hindi na masakit."

[iamlove05]

Too sad to function right.

Late night thoughts (via forgottenfeeelings)

[iamlove05]

Joining the Bandwagon

You started this with a simple "hi" and then one day you asked her out. You've been her constant messenger buddy. You let her get used to your good morning and good night texts. You became part of her daily routine in a snap. She always thought you would make her your girl---as the months passed you continued that thing so called "dating". She didn't ask, she didn't demand for anything nor assume any position in your life. She simply go with the flow and just kept holding on to your "someday we'll figure things out." Until days became months, whenever she'd ask you, you'd dismiss it. Then your actions speak louder---your texts take longer and longer, you've become complacent, went on for days without a beep. You simply let her wait for something that you didn't have any plans to do so in the first place. Later on, you two would argue about your romantic status, she wanting to make it official and you giving some lame excuses that there was no need to label what you had, she just break down and cry and you try to make it up to her the next day. But still, no resolutions made. And you carried on anyway because you were going okay, you get along. She got too tired to fight it anymore. She just went with the flow; it seemed much easier than the cycle of demanding and rejecting that had become the norm. Sounds cliché, but she never thought you'd mean that much to her. She's almost at her breaking point and she don't know how much longer she can take before she leaves. You've raised her hopes, you made her so intoxicated on the idea that this could be an extraordinary lovestory---something spectacular. But instead, stories like yours made her prefer to sit on the sidelines of life--to observe rather than partake. She's been so exhausted to wait for you to be ready for the next step. Is she just the girl you keep because she's willing to put up with that no label thing? Was she not good enough? In the short period she get to know you, you made her feel capable---capable to love and be loved in return. She admitted that she wants to want you, and part of her hoped that she could transform you. Part of her hoped that she could be the game-changer. And that maybe, just maybe, she could be the exception. But you simply refused to accept the love that she keeps on offering to you. And that's where confusion sets in, you're single, she's single, you both obviously like each other, but seems you're not comfortable with that relationship thing. And then all of a sudden she felt it---you wanted to stop. And right then and there she kept herself from running after you. She've got her pride and promised to herself that she won't seek for answers. She just woke up and told herself that she won't ask anything from you. And now, she's been living her life like hell, dwelling with that feeling of being not enough for someone despite of all the things she has done for the guy who's not been ready all along. You showed her all the signs, you gave her all the signals. You let her in, only to let her down. This goes out to every guy who has ever avoided a relationship for whatever reasons they want to tell themselves. I wonder why you guys pursue someone but after some time you're still not ready to make things official. Is it because you just want things easy? You want to devoid yourself from heartache, the fights, the jealousy, or anything that comes with the downside of relationships. Please guys, don't chase someone just to let them go. Don’t talk to someone everyday if you don’t want an emotional connection. Don’t do relationship-like things with a person if you don’t want a relationship. If you're not ready yet then don't make a move. 'Cause if you're scared, we girls are too. You're not the only one who's terrified of failed relationships, we are both looking for happy-ever-after and playing it cool won't work with us. We don't usually invest ourselves--time and affection---just for fun. We're scared that after everything we've poured into that relationship will be worthless. Relationships can be beyond messy, unpredictable, and it entails a ridiculous amount of work but it can also be breathtakingly amazing. That's what people live and die for, those amazing moments with the person they are hopelessly in love with. So to you, the guy who wasn't ready, I want you to know that I get tired of waiting for you. I don't know until when I can keep myself from communicating with you, i'm not even sure if I can stick to my promise that I won't talk to you again. But i'll just keep on reminding myself of how tiring this game of yours has been. I want you to know that I was hurt, you awaken the rarest and best part of me but left me deal with it alone. I want you to know I am sad for making me feel that I can have you but everytime I seek for your company you made me feel terribly alone. I am now bitterly smiling as I look at my reflection and remember that I was able to defy oceans for your love. Rising from the ground alone, after you left me hanging, made me stronger. I guess that's too much of a memory. We had our chance. I've done my part--I've poured my best. I know wounds heal, bitterness does not make its home in a heart that is soft and loving and I could never be numb for too long. I'm not sure if you're aware of this pain you caused. But I know I'll be able to forgive you, someday. 🙏

[iamlove05]

http://iglovequotes.net/

[iamlove05]

http://iglovequotes.net/

[iamlove05]

We’re over now, and the saddest thing is we never began.

ohnatalierose (via wnq-writers)

[iamlove05]

Travel to unfamiliar places with a familiar face. The person you’re with will make you feel at home even when you’re miles away.

kajewrotethat (via wnq-writers)

[iamlove05]

She knows who she is. She just forgot for a little while.

Donald Miller (via wordsnquotes)

[iamlove05]

Meet my wander-mates. 👟👟👟

[iamlove05]

The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best out of everything.

[iamlove05]

It hurts being the one who loves more.

Aimee Carter, Goddess Interrupted (via wordsnquotes)

[iamlove05]

She was so good at keeping the promises she made to those she loved, but was even better at breaking the ones she made to and for herself.

practicecautiousoptimism  (via wnq-writers)

[iamlove05]

Everything has an expiry date. Even people. So enjoy yourself, the people around you and the good in life before it all expires.

enigmatic-thinker  (via wnq-writers)

[iamlove05]

I don't want to message you first, cause I want you to make me feel that you miss me and that I am somewhat important to you. Cause actually I am starting to feel that I am the only one who wants to make this work, to let this grow into something deeper. 💔