icandothetango

[icandothetango]

fuck this time loop im leaving (walks into a different, worse time loop)

[icandothetango]

What are some chronic illnesses that can only occur in a fantasy setting?

[icandothetango]

"How do you write such realistic dialogue-" I TALK TO MYSELF. I TALK TO MYSELF AND I PRETEND I AM THE ONE SAYING THE LINE. LIKE SANITY IS SLOWLY SLIPPING FROM BETWEEN MY FINGERS WITH EVERY MEASLY WORD THEY TYPE OUT. THAT IS HOW.

[icandothetango]

You will not use AI to get ideas for your story. You will lie on the floor and have wretched visions like god intended

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*releases pack of dads into home depot* go……be free

[icandothetango]

“i am a monument to all your sins” is such a fucking raw line for a villain it’s amazing that it came from halo, a modernish video game, and not some classical text or mythos

[icandothetango]

the number of times harry describes draco in ways that make it clear he thinks of him as his main nemesis is so funny given that voldemort is the one who keeps trying to murder harry

voldemort out there like: can i please get some respect over here?

[icandothetango]

Chappell Roan as Botticelli’s Venus 🐚

[icandothetango]

The completely different vibes of the censored and uncensored lines...

[icandothetango]

yeah

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FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

The Vampire Lestat returns

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hades explaining that he’s the god of the dead, not the god of death

[icandothetango]

iwtv doing the 'evil version' of popular romance tropes is so funny to me.

there's only one bed? well what about there's only one coffin because the other one got thrown off a window as a direct fuck you to the love interest?

enemies to lovers? yeah because one of them has been psychosexually tortured by the other and in retaliation ruined his marriage.

exes to lovers? sure but their separation is due to one of them murdering the other and then entering a new 77-year relationship out of spite with the guy who killed his daughter.

age gap? and it's the oldest and the youngest character but NOT in the way you think.

friends to lovers? eh probably not but you get a friend pairing and they bond over getting their memories fucked with by their shared boyfriend.

guy who hates everyone and likes only you? how about a guy who won't subject anyone to the horrors of vampirism EXCEPT you because you pissed him off THAT much?

grumpy x sunshine? how about theatre kid x guy who fucking HATES theatre kids and yet dates TWO of them?

forced proximity? try being in a 70+ year relationship with a guy you find maddeningly BORING just to spite your ex!

[icandothetango]

lestat gets cancelled again immediately after the article gets published

swifties dont come at me this is all just jokes pls

[icandothetango]

louis whispering in lestat's ear and kissing his face gently is all i care about this is all i'm talking about until season 3 goodbye

[icandothetango]

Know only this, mon cher, you are the only being i trust, and whom i love, above and beyond myself.

[icandothetango]

FANTASTIC BEASTS: THE SECRETS OF DUMBLEDORE

Gellert Grindelwald’s Very Successful Guide to Getting His Husband Back