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A Cybertronian Taste Guide to the Periodic Table of Elements

What exists below is a list of every element and a guide to how it tastes to Cybertronian kind.

Hydrogen – Dangerous, tastes extremely cold and bitter with sour undertones. Poisonous as it makes metal brittle.

Helium – Minty tasting gas can be refined to form a super-conductive concentrate used as Cybertronian equivalent to the drug speed

Lithium – Very sweet, cybertronian equivalent to pop rocks. Should not be mixed with liquid fuels

Beryllium – Minty and cold. Excellent topping to go with sweet flavors

Boron – used mainly as a cleaner. Tastes EXTREMELY bitter

Carbon – has no taste and is often used as a ‘food base’ in its pure form similar to rice or bland potatoes on Earth.

Nitrogen – has little taste and is considered of little use, is often used as a filler in cybertronian junk food

Oxygen – Considered dangerous in its pure form. It can, however, be used to purge system contaminates in smaller more diluted forms.

Fluorine – Poisonous and corrosive this is not safe for consumption. I’m told it tastes both sour and bitter with rancid undertones by those unfortunate enough to have tried eating it.

Neon – cold with a fresh smell. The plasma is used in medicine and it’s not often consumed as food but is used in the preservation of food in coolers and refrigeration units.

Sodium – only safe in its iodized form. Tastes salty ( I don’t know what else you expected )

Magnesium – sour-sweet taste favored by flight-frames for its health benefits

Aluminum – Sour and tastes warm even when served cold. Best used in combination with sweeter additives.

Silicon – savory-sweet often consumed as an aphrodisiac because of its similar tast to certain portions of a mech’s anatomy.

Phosphorus – extremely bitter and sour. While not often used in food it is used as a spray-on chemical deterrent on items not meant for consumption in order to ensure sparklings (and idiots) don’t accidentally consume something they shouldn’t.

Sulfur – savory and bitter, it is generally only used in medicine but some mechs have refined it to use as a flavoring on certain kinds of snacks.

Chlorine – salty and sweet, it’s best avoided as it’s poisonous and can create an oxidizing effect and lead to painful rust infections. Some mechs swear by it as an additive to some savory dishes … so long as one keeps plenty of antidote on hand.

Argon – Harmless, tasteless gas which is usually not consumable but can be used as an additive in items such as whipped energon in order to create a lighter, fluffier end result.

Potassium – Salty and sweet this is used in many dishes as a flavor enhancer or spice and can even is a favorite dessert topping

Calcium – savory and sweet it’s often used as an additive to flavorful dishes and is favored by speedsters

Scandium – savory with a slight bitter undertone, often used in stews and in thick gruels

Titanium – savory with very slight sour undertones this is often eaten for it’s medicinal properties and enjoyed in nearly every savory dish

Vanadium – savory with slight sweet undertones it is highly favored by larger hauler class mechs who enjoy sprinkling it over various street foods.

Chromium – a very popular savory additive that is beloved for its anti-corrosive properties. Some of the oldest Cybertronian recipes feature heavy amounts of chromium. It is particularly enjoyed in pasta dishes.

Manganese - Another popular savory additive though less popular than chromium due to its slightly bitter undertones. Can often be found used as junk food flavoring and is usually associated with unhealthy fuel despite its harmless nature.

Iron – savory with mild sour and bitter undertones depending on who you ask. Beastformers however love this and proclaim it to be salty instead of sour or bitter. It is a common base in many Eukarian dishes.

Cobalt – savory and salty. A common flavoring for snack food, particularly chips and fries.

Nickel – savory and mildly sour this is favored only for its medicinal properties and is usually pared with carbon or calcium when used in recipes.

Copper – a sweet and slightly savory additive that is favored by the miner and warrior castes as a cheaper alternative to sweeter additives like gold. Miners often use it as a topping on popped coil kernels creating a Kaon local delicacy known as Copper Kern.

Zinc – a salty and sour additive that is popular in cocktails as a garnish in a similar manner to olives or pearl onions

Gallium – bland with mildly sweet tones, gallium often forms the basis of most Cybertronian ‘bread’ products as gallium wheat is a popular product due to its speed of growth and ease of cultivation.

Germanium – a semi-sweet element with mildly bitter undertones Germanium is considered to be the Cybertonian chocolate and is used in conjunction with sweeter additives or even cyberorganic fruit as hugely popular candies.

Arsenic – semi-sour, Arsenic is greatly favored as a pairing with other spicier flavorings. Tyger Pax in particular was known for a dish made of Arsenic and uranium.

Selenium – Salty and semi-sweet this is often used as a garnish for savory and sweet dishes

Bromine – while not often used in food Bromine is an effective ‘downer’ drug and is used in the production of Syk.

Krypton – In high dose case canisters Krypton can be used as a sweet tasting additive for circuit boosters and energy drinks. A particularly popular energy drink known as Krypt was the native creation of Polyhex and the drink’s mascot, Unicron, was often pictured climbing out of his grave to hand customers a can.

Rubidium – warm and slightly spicy this element is often used to add a very mild heat to a dish akin to the way humans use black pepper.

Strontium – in its stable form it is considered to be fresh and sweet. When consumed in its unstable form it is sweet and spicy. Either way Strontium is often used in mixed drinks and smoothies.

Yttrium – mildly sweet and fresh with health benefits that aid optical sensors. Yttrium is often used in salad toppings or mixed into soups.

Zirconium – savory but with a distinctive earthiness that most find distinctly unappealing.

Niobium – Bitter and savory it’s often eaten as a health food but otherwise is not much enjoyed. Certain products will add it to their flavorings as a way to appear healthier than they are.

Molybdenum – savory and fresh this element is favored by warrior caste mechs and is often added to shakes in order to help boost performance.

Technetium – savory and spicy this is often used as a the main flavoring in Cybertronian curries.

Ruthenium – sweet and savory with distinct bitter undertones that make it undesirable to most. It’s often paired in dishes with Yttrium in order to tone down the bitter aftertaste.

Rhodium – a light, savory and sweet additive Rhodium is favored by bots concerned with their appearance as it is said to have finish enhancing abilities.

Palladium – sweet, savory and fresh Palladium is a coveted part of most high-class Cybertornian meals.

Silver – sweet and fresh silver is the most common flavor additive and is often referred to as the ‘vanilla’ of the Cybertronian world. Perhaps that is why the term ‘silver-plated’ is often used to refer to mechs who aren’t considered adventurous in the bedroom.

Cadmium – sweet with a sharp earthiness that most Cybertronians cannot stand, though some take it as a medicine to help improve energy retention.

Indium – A fresh, bland, and mildly bitter element Indium is enjoyed for its ability to strengthen a mechs gloss and shine. It is often used in light nutritious meals or in beauty supplements.

Tin – An earthy, fresh tasting alloy often used to cut-down either sweet or spicy flavors in dishes. Though usually used in small amounts tin also has helpful properties that many mechs find appealing.

Antimony – A sour and fresh tasting additive that is also used in many cosmetics. Antimony can often be seen used in certain summer time drinks as it’s considered to be quite refreshing and cooling.

Tellurium – The Cybertronian version of garlic Tellurium is used in basically any dish that most mechs would consider to be good. It has a strong salty, fresh, and slightly sour taste that many bots cannot help loving.

Iodine – normally not consumed save to assist in the case of radiation poisoning Iodine is extremely bitter and sour in a horribly unpleasant way.

Xenon – a downer, Xenon is often ‘smoked’ as the Cybertronian equivalent of weed. Save for flyers who have an opposing reaction and use it often as booster. Many energy drink marketed and designed in Vos feature Xenon and have led to the mistaken belief that most Seekers are constantly high.

Cesium – Extremely sweet. So much so that most mechs cannot stand the taste until it has been added to other elements. It’s surprisingly well-liked by miner-castes who sprinkle it on just about all of their desserts. Tarn in particular was known for their Cesium Sweets, a taffy like candy a mech could chew for nearly a full hour without losing flavor.

Barium – A tasteless, bland, cleanser often used to help clear out a mech’s vents. Usually taken as a remedy for some lesser illnesses affecting a bot’s respiratory systems.

Lanthanum – a savory-sweet element that is favored for it’s light effecting abilities. It’s particularly popular with Praxians who swear by it for afternoon snacks.

Cerium – Savory and highly sour Cerium is mostly used in cosmetics but you can also find it used in certain savory dishes once the sour taste has been neutralized by other blander ingredients.

Praseodymium – A bland and mildly savory additive that is often used as a base in baking for darker and more savory bread blends. It is particularly enjoyed as a crust on savory dishes.

Neodymium – A bland and mildly sour additive that is mostly used in medicine to help treat audial disorders. Most bots associate this taste with medicine due to its use in many medicines marketed for new-builds and sparklings.

Promethium – spicy and savory Promethium is often enjoyed in mild salsas and sauces

Samarium – a savory and mildly spicy additive that is used in medicine and few places else as it rarely pairs well with other flavors

Europium – A savory additive often beloved in cocktail mixes that activate its phosphorescence for an impressive display.

Gadolinium – Minty and sour this is often enjoyed by rescue bots working in hazardous fields due to its health properties.

Terbium – a savory filler additive often enjoyed as a snack.

Dysprosium – a bitter and sour additive that is often taken to improve memory health. It is often consumed as tea and treated with great respect by older mechs.

Holmium – savory and sweet Holmium is a deadly Cybertronian poison that has been historically used to poison food as it can be undetectable until after consumption. Many famous figures have met their end due to this element.

Erbium – A sweet and fresh tasting element, Erbium is often favored by femmes who often extol upon its refined palate.

Thulium – A bland semi-savory additive often eaten as a flat chip snack by smaller bots, particularly laser-pointers who can’t seem to get enough of the stuff.

Ytterbium – the more dangerous cousin to thulium, Ytterbium is not often enjoyed despite its savory flavor due to its habit of catching on fire. That said, it does make for some truly impressive meals if you’re brave enough to try.

Lutetium – A crunchy and slightly spicy additive that is often eaten like popcorn at movies.

Hafnium – A semi-sweet additive often enjoyed by medics who often add it to their morning rations of stimulant.

Tantalum – a sour-sweet additive often made into energon candies and particularly enjoyed as a rust-stick flavor.

Tungsten – a bitter and sour additive often used by warrior caste mechs in cocktails or brewed into Engex ales. Kegs of Tungsten Brew are a particular favorite of young warrior caste parties.

Rhenium – A bland and savory additive favored as a snack by flight frames, particularly seekers who serve it drizzled over noodles or raw cyber fauna meat.

Osmium – A crunchy and savory additive often used as bar nuts in pubs

Iridium – A savory and so-called gamey additive not often consumed on Cybertron proper but beloved by Beastformers as a delicacy.

Platinum – a light and savory additive, Platinum is highly prized as a delicacy.

Gold – everyone’s favorite sweet and tangy treat! Gold is used in just about every dessert, cocktail, and snack food Cybertron has to offer.

Mercury – A mildly sour-sweet additive that is often enjoyed as a palate cleanser between meals by natives of Iacon's Towers.

Thallium – A sour treat often only enjoyed diluted though certain mechs enjoy it served raw on their energon ( those bots are, of course, psychopaths).

Lead – A slightly savory and bland additive that is often used in dishes meant to be easy on the tank. Though eating too much of it will cause ‘lead tank’ syndrome which can lead a mech’s systems to slow down and become clogged.

Bismuth – a slightly sour additive with mildly spicy undertones that is particularly favored in Cybertronian BBQ dishes.

Polonium – A very spicy additive with sweet undertones that is a favorite of places such as Tetrahex and Helex who use it as a sauce in some soups and noodle-dishes.

Astatine – An explosively spicy additive it is advised that this should not be consumed unless one is in space. Open air space restaurants are usually famous for their Astatine salsas.

Radon – a spicy gas with sour and sweet undertones that often causes hallucinogenic fits in Cybertronians.

Francium – A very spicy additive normally only used in extreme hot sauces.

Radium – An extremely spicy additive with savory undertones that is beloved in Cybertronian burritos and curries alike.

Actinium – a spicy additive often added to drinks to alter their color. Some mechs from Nyon swear by their spicy Nyon Sunset mixes though other cities often refer to the drink as a ‘Bloody Sunset’ instead.

Thorium – A mildly spicy additive with sweet undertones that is highly favored by scientist caste mechs. It’s often used in spicy snacks or candies and can often be seen as a flavoring on snacks littered around labs and science buildings.

Protactinium – A spicy and sour additive that is not particularly popular as it rarely pairs well with other spices.

Uranium – a moderately spicy additive with savory undertones that is highly favored as a snack and mixture in sauces and spice mixtures for many dishes. It was particularly popular in Tarn and Kaon.

Neptunium – A moderately spicy additive that is favored by shuttles and is featured in a notorious Vosnian dish that features many variations with recipes being jealously guarded by entire build lines due to competitions held to determine which house has the better dish. It is comparable to chili on Earth.

Plutonium- a moderate to extremely spicy additive that is used in everything from savory and spicy sandwiches to flaming hot chip recipes.

Americium – A mildly spicy additive favored for it’s smokey flavor. It’s a particular favorite of boil dishes and barbecue meals out of Tyger Pax.

Curium – a very spicy additive often avoided due to its habit of easily reaching critical mass. Though one candy company has done well marketing it as ‘explosively good’. Nukes, as they're called, were a treat enjoyed in certain circles in Iacon.

Berkelium – A very spicy additive with sour undertones often used as a minuscule starter for some Cybertronian baked goods

Californium – A very spicy additive with savory undertones that is enjoyed in certain seafood dishes

Einsteinium – An extremely spicy additive not advised for consumption. If you eat it any way we suggest having a barrel of Boltvine milk on hand.

Fermium – An extremely spicy additive only idiots consume.

Mendelevium – An extremely spicy additive that is nearly impossible to consume and yet you’re going to try anyway aren’t you? Dumbaft.

Nobelium – Why are you trying to eat something so spicy you’re guaranteed to go blind doing so?

Lawrencium – An extremely spicy thing that exists and you can’t eat it. You can’t. Because I said so.

Rutherfordium – How would you even eat this extremely spicy element ? That’s not a question we want an answer to by the way. Save yourself the trouble and don’t eat it.

Dubnium – If you try to eat this your fuel pump and your spark go ‘unst unst unst’ and then you die.

Seaborgium – Ha! It only exists for 14 minutes so I bet you can’t eat it anyway! It’s very spicy and – No that wasn’t a challenge!!

Bohrium – You know what, if you can eat something that only exists for 61 seconds all power to you. You spawn of Unicron you.

Hassium – Sixteen seconds to eat it. Go. I bet you- BLURR NO!!

Meitnerium – Why are we? You can’t eat it, it barely exists. And I bet it’s so spicy it’ll literally burn right through you.

Darmstadtium – I don’t know why I’m including this but it would set you on fire just touching it to your glossa. Don’t try it.

Roentgenium – I bet this one knocks out all your teeth and then takes your lunch money.

Copernicium – The burn that keeps on burning

Nihonium – It’s a theoretical burn so bad your offspring feel it.

Flerovium – You’re about to get roasted! By science!

Msocovium – You’re so dumb I bet you’d try to eat a star while still on the spaceship!

Livermorium – Oo!! Burn!

Tennessine – Well boy howdy bot you can’t eat that ya’ll’dve hurt yerself

Oganesson – It doesn’t even exist so don’t even try it.

#he he he i love how at the end it just becomes more chaotic and less proffesional #just imagine #some scienteists are trying to build a new demon core #and for whatever reason when a cybertronian shows up in the lab they just snach the plutonium core and eat it #even better if that was in a battle- they flu through a wall and crash near the humans #one look at the core and “oh a snack”#and almost immedietly run into the battle while shouting with a full mouth some kond of thanks #transformers #maccadams #idiot discovered rebloging

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