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[idris-triton]

perfectlymcd‌

As much as she liked to pretend, Mimsy’s heart was not nearly so corrupted as she made it out to be. Perhaps that was why she found herself feeling bad for this Idris. But could she express it well? Absolutely not. Still, she felt she had to do something. 

“Hey hey hey, come back here, we’re not done mister! I still don’t have a word, and you need to help me find one.” 

Idris was collecting his books into his bag when Mimsy spoke up again, the young prince looking at her with surprise but he didn’t stop in his task.  “If I help you won’t I just ruin it again with the sound of my voice or something?”  He was genuinely perplexed, not wanting to ruin the young woman’s day but also assuming she’d much rather not hear him or deal with him being nosy.

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

“Yes and how they were raised.”

“Have you ever talked to a VK about how they were raised?  Most of them went unloved without any attention and had to raise themselves.  And I’m sure your parents raised you to be kind an good, but you certainly didn’t turn out that way.”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌

Of course, Jackson wasn’t suspecting anything out of this conversation, he just wanted Idris to know what was going on, because he felt like he had a right to know it wasn’t anything bad or that Jackson was a horrible boyfriend, it was just that the guy had a mental disorder. Pulling back from him, Jackson looked up at his ex-boyfriend and gave him a soft smile. “I could never hate you, Idris. Yes, I was upset and I was beating myself up over the break-up but I never hated you. I don’t blame you for talking to me, I wasn’t the most pleasant person and I know that.”

“Just because you weren’t pleasant all the time doesn’t mean you’re not a pleasant person.  Even not knowing what was wrong you were still a good boyfriend Jackson and...”  Idris looked away, rubbing the back of his neck and shook his head slightly.  “It was ultimately because of me and..stuff I’m dealing with that I had to end things that night.  It wasn’t entirely you.  You being in a bad mood was just what pushed me that night.  I don’t want you taking the blame for it all.  You’re amazing and..and..”  Idris had to force himself to say it, his jaw tensing a little though he knew he wanted Jackson to he happy.  “Whoever you end up with will be beyond lucky to have someone like you.”

[idris-triton]

perfectlymcd‌:

Mimsy rolled her eyes, her thoughts leaving her mouth like they normally did,”Well I was expecting something more exciting, and now I am thoroughly bored. ‘Haze’ was all he heard, eh? Just ‘haze,’ well he at least could’ve made something up, rather than-” she stopped short, pen midair, and looked up at him once more, irritation written over her face, “Now look what you’ve done! I can’t very well write ‘haze’ in my poem, because it’s been contaminated with your voice!” 

Idris expression completely dropped, sighing a bit as the girl expressed her displeasure.  Of course he’ messed up.  That’s what he did now.  “I’m just going to go..I’m truly sorry.  I hope you enjoy the rest of your day miss.”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

The conversation went a lot better then Jackson had suspected it would and he was kind of glad it did. Although he had to admit, he didn’t mean that he was happier without Idris, because he wasn’t. He just really was glad that it wasn’t something he was doing or he wasn’t a bad person, he just happened to have a chemical imbalance in his brain.”I’m not happier without you…you know, I’m just, I’m happy that there’s nothing wrong with me in a sense, that I have a chemical imbalance.” He explained to him before giving him a soft smile and nodded. “I’m slowly learning that.” He went over to him and hugged him tightly before freezing. “Oh, shit. Sorry. I just-I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable.”

Idris looked up at him in surprise when he made his clarification, a part of him thrilled to know it though the more rational side of his brain stomped it down.  Breaking up with Jackson was the best thing Idris could’ve done for Jackson right now, and he didn’t regret it.  Even if it hurt just looking at the other cause of the ache in his chest.  “I am too.  I was worried it’d be something awful like a brain tumor or something and I..well. I’m glad it’s treatable and something you can understand now.  But yeah, no calling yourself crazy.  You’re not.”  

Idris tensed a little at the hug, the sudden nearness and just comfort he felt from that one embrace threatening what emotional control he did have, having to swallow thickly and look up at the ceiling to avoid the immediate reaction he had.  “N-No, it’s fine.  I, I was just...it caught me off guard is all.  Figured the break-up and then months of silence would’ve made you hate me.”

[idris-triton]

perfectlymcd‌:

“Terribly sorry, eh?” Mimsy raised an eyebrow and nodded, “I can live with ‘terribly,’ terrible is good,” she nodded slightly and continued to look at him. She thought about turning back to her paper in a huff and not giving it a second thought, but another phrase of his stopped her, “What about me distracted you, exactly, huh?” Suspicion edged into her voice, “And how much did you see? Speak truthfully now, I’ll know if you’re lying.” 

Idris truly did feel bad.  He tried not to be nosy, especially now that he was more the secretive sort.  He expected she would return to her task and he would just leave, not wanting to bother her again when she posed her question, the young prince responding immediately.  “I heard you muttering about your writing when I was reading.  I’d just turned around to see what it was you were doing when you noticed.  I swear it, I didn’t read a word of your work, though I heard you mumble something about a haze.”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

Jackson looked up at him when he started speaking again and gave him a soft smile. “I’m still sorry for being such a mess sometimes though. I hated it, and I was so confused, I didn’t know what was going on with me or what was happening.” He admitted before sniffling a bit, looking back down. “Yeah, I’m doing a lot better and I’m happy. Figuring out what was going on, getting on some medication and maintaining a hobby has helped a lot. I’ve learned to talk more if something is bothering me rather than bottling it up.” He sighed softly. “Thanks for listening. I just thought you deserved to know. It wasn’t you. I’m just crazy.”

“And I hated being so helpless.  Not being what you needed, or even being able to make you feel better....it was rough.  But, what matters to me is that you know now, and that you’re aware of it.  I’m really, really happy you’re better Jackson.”  Idris smile softly at him before he was looking away again, the young man letting himself study Jackson closer than he likely should.  He was still very attractive, and he did look healthy, Idris was happy to see.  He really wanted to kiss him, this making him that happy.  But that thought alone was enough to snap him back to reality, Idris gaze dropping to the floor.  Hearing he was better and happier than when they were together was what was best for him after all.  Idris hadn’t been enough to help Jackson with this disorder before, and he wasn’t going to be enough for him heathier now that his life was filled with much less opportunity and much more stress.  “Thank you for telling me.  Really Jackson...it’s amazing.  And you’re not crazy, it’s a mental health thing.”  He nodded before shifting back, figuring the other would prefer him gone now.  “I’m really, really happy for you Jackson.”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

“I don’t see how it could bug Ak’s, you guys are like evil, right?”

Idris cocked his head, having never been taken for a VK before. It was flattering, in an odd way.  “You think people are evil just because of where they were when they were born?”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

“Eh, well, she got the message so it seems that my ‘rudeness’ did the trick.” He told him, rolling his eyes.

“You do know that being an asshole is something that bugs AK’s and VK’s, right?  But hey, you do you.”

[idris-triton]

perfectlymcd‌:

Mimsy bent over a pad of paper, scratching away furiously and murmering to herself, “Haze, faze, daze…yes daze! Maze craze…ooh craze, craze is good!” So engrossed in her creation of poetry was she that she nearly jumped when she sensed someone looking over her shoulder. She whirled around to glare at them, covering the poem with her hands, “Hey! Can’t you see I’m working on a very important task and should not be disturbed?” Her hands shifted to cover the words even more, “This is a private business, and I’d thank you to mind yours!” Her mind focused on protecting her creation from prying and judgmental eyes, she did not truly recognize who she was addressing. 

@vk-harry // whoever! PS the last sentence is in case you wanna respond with someone she knows already and maybe wouldn’t snap at :)

Idris had been trying to study nearby, determined to at least finish this semester well even if it was insane with his new workload.  However, he was distracted by a girl sitting behind him, mumbling and scribbling on a sheet of paper.  Just as he’d looked back and at the paper she noticed him there, the young man jumping a bit at her tone and lifting his hands in surrender.  “I’m so sorry.  I just got distracted and looked and, honestly, terribly sorry.”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

He nodded at him before chewing on his bottom lip gently. “I- we both did, but I get why you said it. I wasn’t an easy boyfriend, and I hated that. Reflecting back, I wish I would have handled everything better. I ended up getting into a really bad fight with someone, and it scared the hell out of me. I’ve never been a violent person, but I..” He couldn’t finish the sentence. “After getting checked out at the hospital, my dad took me to another doctor and then that doctor turned into three new ones. Um, anyway. they told me I was suffering from untreated Bipolar Disorder, which is a disorder that affects my brain. I’m doing good now..Um, I’m on medication, got my anger under control and I don’t get so depressed but I have my ups and downs. I feel like you deserve to know, because I put you through hell and I am so, so, sorry for that. “

Idris listened attentively, hanging on the other’s every word.  He hated that he’d been in a fight, or that out of control, but he was glad of the end result.  Jackson had needed help that Idris hadn’t ever been able to give, and the fact he was getting it now was fantastic.  Plus his fears were unfounded; the man he loved wasn’t dying. “Jackson, I..I’m not excited about the fight, for obvious reasons, and the road there was hard, but I am.. I’m really glad you’re getting help.  To clarify you weren’t a nightmare, or hell for me.  There were days...but I...”  He let out a breath, running his hand through his hair before meeting his eyes.  “Even with the struggles, I loved being with you Jackson.” He managed a weak smile before rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly and looking away.  “So you’re..you’re better?  Happier?”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

Chad groaned. “I did say that.” HE admitted with a shrug. “The girl thought I’d go on a date with her. Um, no. My parents would flip.”

“Yeah, that’s not her being sensitive, you were kind of a dick.  You could’ve just explained your parents are anti-VK rather than be rude.”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

“Can I get you anything?” Jackson asked him as he sat his bag on the couch and leaned against it. “So, um, right. I know I wasn’t the best boyfriend and I said a lot of things to you when we broke up, but it was my fault, and I am sorry. I got worse and an incident occurred, which resulted in my father having to get me checked out..”

“Nah, I’m alright.”  He crossed his arms, studying the other with growing concern.  Idris didn’t like Jackson blaming himself, or the subsequent spiral he’d apparently caused with the breakup.  “It’s alright.  I said things I shouldn’t have too.  I’m sorry.”  Frowning slightly, he wasn’t sure whether to inquire about the incident or the checkup first, so he just stayed quiet and let Jackson talk.

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

Chad groaned. “No. I’m just bored.” He admitted, crossing his arms. “I never know what I can do in this damn town, I never know what offends these VK’s and I’m in trouble.”

“Why are you in trouble?  And the VK’s don’t seem to be too easily offended, unless you happen to be looking at them and saying “go back where you came from” or something.”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

Jackson walked with him towards his apartment before looking over at him. “Yeah, I know…I just, I was worried.” He admitted, chewing on his bottom lip gently. He was mostly quiet the walk to his apartment, getting to the door quickly and unlocking it, letting Idris in before following behind.

Idris was content to walk in silence at Jackson’s side, worrying a little bit about the other.  He had guesses as to what Jackson was about to say, but he also worried for the worst as well.  With how his year had gone, he wasn’t putting the worst out of the question.  He stepped into the familiar space and waited, not wanting to get too comfortable.  He had been the one to end things, and this was Jackson’s space.

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

“Yes, it is. I never want to eat bugs again.”

“I don’t know if anyone really wants to eat bugs.  But..it could’ve been worse?”

[idris-triton]

evildreamsandmuses‌:

Jackson nodded. “I don’t have anything to do either. Um, can you come with me, back to my place?” He asked, a bit nervously. “I just, I don’t want anyone else to know and you know gossip gets around here. No one knows except my dad and my therapist.” He admitted, stuffing his hands in his pocket. “It is good to see you, by the way.”

“Yeah, if you’re sure.”  Idris gave Jackson a slight smile, wanting to comfort the other and also knowing he was likely feeling the same awful heartache he was.  “That’s understandable.  Your place it is.”  He easily fell in step next to the other, looking at the ground. “That’s surprising.  But...it’s good to see you too.  Really.”  He’d missed him, though Idris wasn’t dumb enough to voice that.