ihadagutfeeling-blog

[ihadagutfeeling-blog]

I had a Gut feeling

They said have a baby, it’ll be fun! I was pregnant for thirty nine weeks and two days. I was nothing nice while pregnant. I prayed to God all the time, “Lord, please just get me through this”. I swear, being pregnant was one of the hardest things I had ever done. I was sick everyday of my pregnancy except for one, April 7, 2018, my wedding day. I gave birth to a beautiful healthy baby girl on July 21, 2018. My husband and I named her, Jaidyn Lilly!!! Labor was easy-breezy. I only stayed two days at the hospital before I was discharged. Yay! We were so excited to get home and start life with our baby girl. As soon as we got her home, she started to cry, instantly. Of course, I was a bit concerned but we got into the swing of things as a family. I had always seen people with newborns. They ate, slept, pooped and cried a little. My baby began to cry All. The. Time. I joked with my Mom that I’m gonna take her back to the hospital because she’s broken. Yes, I was kidding but she did cry a bit too much. My motherly instincts kicked in. I noticed that she was spitting up and throwing up often. Then, on September 7, 2018, our precious newborn threw up and choked on it. I couldn’t clear her airway on my own. So, I did what any sane person would do. I called 911 and they sent an ambulance to help. During this event, my husband was at work, providing for the family. It was just me and our newborn baby at home. I literally thought the paramedics would clear her airway and send us back into our house. Nope, we were loaded into the back of the ambulance, the lights and sirens were turned on and they swiftly escorted us to Children’s Hospital. I was terrified. I distinctly remember one of the EMT’s saying, “She’s not really responding to anything we’re doing”! Huh? What?! I was justifiably in tears as she started to throw up again during our ride. The EMT had her strapped to the gurney but she was struggling to free her so she wouldn’t choke again. After what felt like hours, we finally, arrived at the hospital. There was a team of at least eight medical personnel waiting for us. Inside the emergency room, the staff frantically started moving our baby from side to side, poking her, drawing blood and of course, running a multitude of tests. I was frantic. A mess. But my sweet daughter needed me. I put on a brave face as she was admitted to the PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit). Throughout the first night, they ran test after test and couldn’t decipher what was causing her to throw up and choke. None of us had a single clue. Four days later, we were finally back at home. She was diagnosed with Infant Apnea. Now, stay with me because this is where our testimony begins. On September 20th, 2018, our baby threw up all over our bed. We changed the sheets and her clothes. She looked peaceful and totally fine. So we decided to wind down for the night. Suddenly, I thought to myself, “She’s sleeping so well that I can put her in her bassinet tonight”. I assumed that she had simply ate good and was “milk drunk”. BUT THE HOLY SPIRIT SPOKE! Thank God I listened! I kept her in my arms and we all went to sleep. A few hours later, we woke to her throw up all over the bed and my arm, again. Now, I’m wondering why this keeps happening. Every time I laid her down she would start throwing up and gagging. A few more hours later, at around four in the morning, I sat straight up in the bed and put her on my chest. It seemed to be the only position that stopped her from throwing but only temporarily. I immediately googled our clinic’s telephone number to see what time they opened and gave them a call. They advised me to bring her in. I quickly made an appointment. Fortunately, their response to bring my child in to them never sat well with me. A mother knows her child. My husband decided not to go to work. Instead, we all got dressed and headed out. While we were on our way to the doctors office, I randomly asked my husband if we should just take her to the hospital instead. His answer was “Yes”! We made a beeline for The Children’s Hospital Emergency Room in downtown Little Rock, Arkansas. It was deja’vu all over again. Team of eight to ten people working on our baby. I was less emotional as I watched them working on her, this time. The same tests that all came back negative ten days ago, were all being ran again. Honestly, I was a bit angry because we had already gone through these tests during our previous visit without getting a definite resolution to our daughters condition. I demanded that different test be run. They all looked very puzzled at my request because that was their standard way of doing things. A mother knows her child! Plus, those previous tests hadn’t helped our baby ten days ago. They certainly weren’t helping her now. Then they ordered an ultrasound. That was the answer that we so desperately needed. The ultrasound tech came back in the room and began to look at our daughters belly. I instantly knew something was wrong from the look on her face. They asked us to leave the room while they ran one final test. During this time, my mom arrived at the hospital. While my mom, my husband and I were waiting in a conference room, the ultrasound results came back. That was quick. They asked me to come back in the emergency and told me that Jaidyn, our daughter, had a blockage in her intestines. They needed to do emergency surgery immediately! My heart hit the floor. I asked that they bring my husband, her dad, in the emergency room and explain it to him as well. I couldn’t. They obliged. Sadness filled the room. Our two month old baby had to go under the knife. We pulled ourselves together and signed the consent form to allow them to operate on our baby. One of her surgeons explained that the surgery would be very simple. They would make a very small incision and untwist the bowel. Then close her back up. A different surgeon said flatly, “You know she needs her bowel to live”. I looked at her in complete shock. Did she really just say that to me? I needed some positivity and a little empathy. I left my baby in their hands and headed to the waiting room where my family was. I was praying and shaking as I waited to be told the next step. After a few hours, we got a call telling us to head to the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU), where we anxiously waited to see our daughter. The first thing I saw was her intestines in a bag, sitting on top of, not in her stomach. This is not what they told me they were going to do. Tears started racing down my face. Seeing the frustration and concern on my face, the surgeon explained what they had done. He said the bag was called a silo bag. They wanted to see if the small intestine would come alive after they untwisted them. I literally couldn’t focus on his words. All I could see was that bag. A silo bag. The intestines looked dead from what I could see. They were purple and gray. She had a total of four surgeries during her first five days of being admitted into the hospital. She lost three fourths of her small intestine. Yes, that’s where humans get all our nutrition from. Also, she was on a breathing machine. Our baby had tubes and wires running into her from every direction you could think of. It was a scary sight to see. I remember doctors asking me to sign consent forms to do a multitude of things to our baby. It was truly overwhelming. Once, I was standing in the hospital room, nurses and doctors were running in and out of her room. Her blood pressure had bottomed out. There was at least ten people in that room working on her. I could see the fright on each one of their faces. I almost felt like I was reading their minds. Their minds were screaming this baby might not make it out of here. In that moment, I gathered myself and left the hospital. I had to find help! I mean real help. Have you ever needed help that was bigger than you, your family, the doctors and anything that the hospital or their social workers could give you? I did. So, I got in my car and I drove east on I-630. I got off the freeway on the 15th street exit. There were tears in my eyes as I parked my car at 14th and college. I began to cry out to the Lord, like never before. I asked him to heal my baby! I cried, I screamed, I moaned, I hummed, I sung. I said “Heal my baby, Lord” over and over and over and over until the Lord spoke to me. He spoke in the clearest voice. He told me “It was done”! I drove back to that hospital, went back in that room where my daughter was and just knew it was well. Everything that they told me was wrong, I said “Not so”. I felt very confident in saying that after my conversation with God. Eventually, a kidney doctor came in and told me my daughter needed dialysis. “Absolutely not”, I said! She came back from her surgery and guess what? Her kidneys were working like a champ! No dialysis needed. I had my nurse page the doctor and had him come look at what MY God can do. He said “I guess you won’t be needing my services”. No, sir, we won’t. Every day our baby got stronger and stronger. Twenty two days later, we were moved to the step down unit. As soon as we got to our next unit, we were fighting for the best for our daughter, AGAIN. Her GI team really wanted her to be on a feeding tube to slowly introduce food back into her GI track. She hadn’t eaten by mouth in twenty two days. She had IV nutrition running twenty four hours straight. She was getting about 32ml an hour since she got there. She fed by the tube for a couple of days but Jaidyn is a breastfeeding baby. So, she wanted the boob. She wanted her milk to touch her mouth first and not just her stomach. I insisted that they let me breastfeed her. They allowed me but it was very difficult at first. I couldn’t tell how much she was actually eating. We began to bottle feed her breastmilk because she just wasn’t eating enough. In the hospital room, My mom and I would debate back and forth about the reason why she wasn’t eating. Oh, Did I mention that my mom stayed with me at the hospital all day and all night and that my husband worked tirelessly to make sure our family stayed afloat? Because They did. And I’m grateful. Back to the story. We decided that the IV nutrition was making her feel full. We had our social worker call a meeting with the entire team to discuss our concerns. During the meeting, I was able to convince them to turn the IV nutrition down. I needed to be sure that was the problem. The hospital said the IV nutrition wasn’t making her full but after turning it down, I was able to get Jaidyn to double her breastmilk intake from 7oz to 14oz, almost instantly. However, her team of doctors decided they wanted to give her a feeding tube to get her intake up, regardless. So, they ordered what they needed over night to get this started the next morning. Can you guess what happened? They came in Jaidyn’s hospital room to put the tube in and I swiftly turned them around. I believed that she could eat enough by mouth. They were not happy about my decision but I didn’t care. A MOTHER KNOWS HER CHILD. I knew my baby could do more than what they thought she could because she is mine. God has given me authority and power over every situation that deals with my daughter. The next day, she was able to eat 24oz by mouth. Won’t he do it?! My mom and I stayed up the entire day and during the night making sure she ate. They didn’t believe me. They even called speech therapy in to watch her eat. The Devil was busy! Long story short, she never got or needed that feeding tube. On another occasion, I had to convince them that she didn’t need to be on IV nutrition all day and night. I wanted to see if we could get her down to a few hours a day. This time, they said okay and turned her down to ten hours a night. Soon our team discovered that she needed more calories. They wanted to fortify my breast milk. By the way, did I mention I ran out of breast milk? I totally did! It was a scary feeling to run out of milk when it was the only thing my daughter could stomach. The lord always has a ram in the bush. My cousin, Amber White, coached me on how to get my supply back up. We had babies at roughly the same time, so she was able to supply me with some much needed breastmilk, too. Also, a friend of mine, Officer Patterson, donated over one hundred ounces of breastmilk to keep Jaidyn’s milk supply stocked up! I will forever be grateful for these two women. We found a formula that we could mix with the breastmilk to give it more calories. Now, Jaidyn was doing extremely well! Growing and glowing, y’all. I asked our GI nurse to see if Jaidyn could go without the IV nutrition, in a controlled environment. The following Monday, she asked the doctor for me. Jaidyn’s GI doctor came in and said, “SHE IS DETERMINED TO PROVE ME WRONG”. We were. The team eventually agreed to a one week time frame to see how well she’d do without the IV nutrition. Jaidyn got a tad bit weak during the week but she was her normal self, again! She had only lost a few ounces. The next Saturday, Jaidyn scared us. After running her blood, they found out that she was dehydrated. What a bummer. A week later, during a meeting with her team of doctors, they said she needed the IV nutrition, again. Her electrolytes were down. I still had a little fight left in me during this period but I asked if she needed all of it. I asked if we could get rid of the bag with the fat(lipids) in it, too. That’s not what was wrong, anyway. Again, they agreed. When I tell you I put up a fight for this child... I did. We went a week like that, it was fine. Woohoo! We had been at the hospital for over two months. So, we were definitely ready to get our daughter home. Our team told me that if all the blood work comes back fine y’all can leave out Wednesday. On Tuesday, they drew her blood and guess what? Her blood levels weren’t were they needed to be to check out but I continued to pack up our room. Speaking of her room, Did I mention that my dad (Jaidyn’s grandfather) brought her a new stuffed animal and a card for every single day that she was in the hospital? Yes, that equals up to over 70 plus plush animals and cards. We displayed them all over our private hospital suite. Love constantly surrounded us. Also, he bought and brought us enough snacks to fill a store aisle. It was appreciated. When I say I was packing, I was! I pretty much needed a whole moving company to get out of that darn hospital. Anyway, back to the story. One of her doctors said the bloodwork results could be a lab error. So, they drew her blood, again. I continued to pack because I was certain that our last day would still be on Wednesday. The blood work came back great, this time. Just as we had planned, we went home on Wednesday. She’s only on a very small amount of IV nutrition. It only has to be run over night. My mom told me early on during this journey, “Don’t believe what you see, See what you believe”! Jaidyn has SHORT BOWEL SYNDROME. You read what I said. Jaidyn has Short Bowel Syndrome but IT DOESN’T have her. We believe she will be medically cleared in Gods time. God has truly carried my entire family through this situation that could have ended horribly. But with faith the size of a mustard seed, he will do the rest! Now, I have a stronger faith and a stronger fight in me. There is truly nothing too hard for my God. I’m writing about my journey to encourage the next family, the next mom or the next dad to always trust your gut feeling. God gave you that little voice that tells you when something isn’t right. In every situation. Advocate for those who can’t advocate for themselves. Don’t give up on God! Always keep a listening ear for him and what you believe because he will guide you. I am truly grateful for my husband! It wasn’t a pretty journey for us. Especially as newly weds with a new born going through this ordeal. He held down the fort like a true champion and didn’t miss a beat. We both went through this the best way we knew how and we are alive to tell the story. I’m forever indebted to my parents. I knew they always loved me but baby, they truly love this grandchild of theirs too. I appreciate them for simply standing by our side through the tough time and filling in all the gaps. Ms. Carolyn Rucker, you did your thing! Showing up day after day to pray, bring meals and loving on Jaidyn. I’m grateful. Our family, near and far, prayed endlessly for our sweet girl. We are so grateful for your prayers and the visits and the love you showed. To my few and I mean few friends, y’all did your thing! Y’all kept my mind on things other than my current situation. And I love you! Pastor, First Lady and our entire church family at Macedonia Baptist church, we love y’all! The gifts and the prayers were right on time! To our siblings, we love y’all, near and far. We had gifts and food coming all the way from L.A., Memphis and right here at home. Love y’all!!! To my husbands job, Jericho’s Way, Mandy and her staff/volunteers blessed us! Mr. Bob, you blessed us! We can’t thank you enough. And to my hospital friends, nurses and doctors... We love y’all so much! Lauren, Amber, Ashley, Brittany, Cheyenne, all the Hannah’s, Justin, Morgan , Nicole, Krislyn and my MVP (that’s what she like to be called) Dr. Cassie!! I love you all! You made the journey so easy by being knowledgeable in your field. Thank you everyone who prayed and posted about our baby. You didn’t even know what was going on but you sent your prayers anyway. Thank You!! Now, go watch and follow baby Jaidyn’s journey on our YouTube channel. It’s called “I had a gut feeling”. We will post more videos on her journey and milestones soon!!! Her first video is up and ready to view!!! Believe = LIFE