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        no one had ever seen through him so easily. it scared him a little, how sharon just knew. He felt selfish sometimes, for spending time with her. it always lingered at the back of his mind that at any time whatever it was between them would sour. everything soured. that was the way of the world.

         he watched her, nearly expressionless. he let out the smallest of breaths when she brushed through his hair. a smile twitched at the corners of his mouth at the joke, and he nudged her, swaying their bodies in answer. "I don't." he let himself smile, just a little one, just for her.

         Rust nodded slowly. "Got it, you nut." he rubbed her back for a while before standing. "You want me to leave you alone so you can get some shut-eye?"

       meeting Rust at the bunny ranch had been an odd experience. shutting down his partner had been fairly easy, but judging whether or not the Texan was a threat to her girls or not was difficult at first. he had a predatory shell, but after some investigation, she discovered it was merely painted on, and not by his own doing. there were cracks in his shell, patched over, certainly, but cracks nonetheless. 

         she let him embrace her with a single arm, brown eyes closing slowly. he was always the slightest bit cold, and she was always warm. it was a pleasant contrast. she put a hand in his hair, brushing the strands into place with a simple swipe of the palm. “Thought you didn’t believe in Jesus, Rust,” she whispered jokingly, even if her voice was slightly weak. 

           Sharon sat down on the bed, allowing his arm to stay around her middle. “I’ll reserve the room for you, and if Sam gives me shit, I’ll sort it out. Got it, cowboy?” she leaned against his shoulder for a moment before going behind him to lay on the sheets. “Got it cowboy?” she whispered, sleepily.

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       Rust reached back and brushed his hand against her arm. He followed her to the trailer, trying to drain away the heat of rage, making sure it would not burst out at her. That was the last thing she needed. He watched, eyes glazed over, as she put the sheets down onto a chair, and moved to kneel in front of her. "Don't sleep here tonight," he said softly, actively holding himself back, taking one of her hands. "I'm not leaving you here alone."

         she slowly let go of him, putting her head on his back for a moment. she was exhausted and her entire body ached. tiredly, she walked to the small circle of girls, hugging a few of the more terrified looking ones before ushering them off to their trailers. she did her best not to limp back to Rust, brushing his hand before she walked into her own trailer. she picked up the blood spattered sheets and put them quietly down onto a free chair, half sitting, half collapsing onto the bed.

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      Rust tensed when the scumbag spat back at him, but didn't pursue it. There was something of a crowd now, and he didn't want to get Sharon into any trouble, much less get himself kicked out on his ass. It was hard to embarrass Rust, but he was pretty sure this would do it. He relaxed his arms, his body, hoping she'd let go so he could turn to face her. This was not a conversation he wanted to have over his shoulder in front of a bunch of teenagers. He grunted his assent.

       she continued to hold him, tightening her grip whenever he pulled too hard away from her. a small group of girls had gathered around the scene, and she did her best to call out to them — telling them to go back to their trailers and settle down for the night. brown eyes turned back to the man who’d started the fight, pointedly flicking the hazel circles out toward the car lot. he glared at Rust for a moment before spitting back at him and leaving. 

                              ‘ Rust. Rust, listen to me. ‘

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Rust resisted, but not enough to get out of her grip. Doing that would mean hurting her. He'd pinned the guy up against her trailer before she ripped him away, and his blood was boiling under his skin.

            ' Sick piece'a shit. '

He spat on the ground, tensed his arms against Sharon's again, but her grip was as good as iron. Jerking away from her but remaining restrained he locked eyes with the guy who was sanding a few feet back, just watching.

        ' You get the fuck outta here before I do something I'm gonna regret. '

         ’ Rust ———————— Rust !!! ‘ 

                she grabbed the man around his arms,                  locking her elbows under his shoulders.                 holding him still wasn’t easy, even with                 digging her heels back into the dirt of                 the Bunny Ranch, littered with old roots.

                              ‘ RUST, stop. ‘

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I can’t say the job made me this way. More like me being this way made me right for the job. I used to think about it more, but you reach a certain age you know who you are. Now I live in a little room, out in the country behind a bar, work four nights a week, and in between I drink. And there ain’t nobody there to stop me. I know who I am. And after all these years, there’s a victory in that.

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"Can I ask you something, Hart?"

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elafakii:

        she could still remember the first time she’d seen him, sauntering into the place she called home for two years going, looking as suspicious as any other man. the girls around her had become her family, and she’d been the first to defend them from any outside threat. and yet, even on that day, before she’d revealed who she truly was, she’d seen something different in the man with stark blue eyes and a tired face.          as she spoke to Sam, she kept a palm on the wood of the door to steady herself. there were more bruises on her body than there had been previously, fault of a few violent customers. ‘ Sam, it’s fine. Go on. I’ll see you tonight. I’ve still got the same shift, right? Right. ‘ Sharon waited until he was down the hall before she shut the door, a trembling sigh falling from her lips. she rubbed her arm, coming back to lay on the bed.         ’ Heroin. Customer this morning wanted to share, and there’s not much you can do to stop them. Always get the shakes when I’m coming down. Haven’t eaten today, either. That doesn’t help. ‘

      There had been something distinctly different about her. Sharon was not like the girls that usually wound up at bunny ranches. She was sharp and wary; not docile and innocent like these girls were supposed to be. She asked a lot of questions, was overtly mistrusting. It probably should have tipped him off sooner. It was all the more enticing when she told Rust who she really was. He had a rule; no unnecessary friendships, relationships, nothing. Sharon had come in and wrecked all that.

       Rust noticed the bruising on her body when she got up to walk to the door. His fists clenched despite himself, and he watched her with alert eyes as she spoke with that motherfucker Sam. One of these days, he thought to himself, one of these days. It wouldn't take much to tip him over the edge. Maybe he'd just scoop her up and take her home and burn the fuckin' bar to the ground. Blow her cover for sure, but it would be worth it to see to it she was safe for once in her goddamned life.

       "Fuck, Shar, jesus." Rust slung an arm around her, stone-faced as ever, but pointedly not looking at her until he collected himself. He wants to tell her she can say no, that she doesn't have to go through any of this. And she doesn't but she also does. He turns to her finally, gently squeezing her hand. "Lemme get you something to eat, all right? You look like you're gonna pass clean out."

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‘ There’s no room in this world for people like us; that’s why we have to stick so close together. ‘

moodboard; sharon and rust. illusoryidentities

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opheliaavery

"You ever hear of a girl called Dora Lange?"

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newtonsimon

"You got something to say, just say it."

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