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Bell: Happy birthday! Here's Woods and Masons' birthday gift!

Hudson: That's quite a large box.

The box: [muffled snickers]

Hudson: they're in there, aren't they

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Bell: Have you ever been cheated on?

Woods: Once. In a firefight last year, Mason had the audacity to run to Hudson instead of me.

Hudson: Proudest moment of my life.

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returning from the sleepy to post a weaver 🥺

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Woods, to Hudson: With all due respect-

Mason: Which is none!

Woods: WHICH IS NONE! Go to hell.

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ask game, gonna do start doing these lol tell me what vibes I give off. If I don’t give off any top row vibes just name any, doesn’t have to be on here

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Bell: If I was thrown into prison, would you-

Adler: No.

Bell: You don't have to say it that fast. Think about it! Let's try again!

Bell: If I was th-

Adler: No.

Bell: You son of a bitch.

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[after the hero cutscene before Solovetsky]

Adler, seeing land: LAND HO!

Bell, standing on the shore: okay that's fucking rude

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Bell: When they put me under some anesthesia once, I thought they'd count down from ten, just like you see on the TV. But instead Adler just looked down on me and said, "goodbye." and I was gone.

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Bell: You... you said I could trust you!

Bell: You said you were a gamer!

Adler: Bell...

Adler: I only play mobile games.

Bell: NO-

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Oh so you think you can escape changing profile pictures? Thats Woods looking at you standing in the stall next to him whilst pissing.

what's he think abt my girth tho

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Lazar: It's October now, so we must- once again- draw battle lines between those who like pancakes and those who do not.

Sims: What battle lines? Nobody likes pancakes.

Woods: FUCK you, pancakes are delicious!

Lazar: and so the first lines are drawn

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dude holy shit im a kroger worker too but id didnt see the end and was like 'oh that sounds like fucking kroger' and then guess what. it was fucking kroger. they suck shit dude im in the break room as we speak and im enraged

This “labor shortage” is such a fucking lie tho. Me and at least six other people quit my old job and all of our positions have been filled within two weeks. Yet the manager was bitching about not having enough people. And people bought it too. No idea how tho, obviously they just wanted to short staff us considering they cut our hours when they were “still hiring”. Anyway fuck Kroger to the max.

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— Homer, The Odyssey I.1-11 (tr. Emily Wilson) // inspired by these lovely edits ♥

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Woods: Aww, they're so cute!

Adler: Thanks, they're a rescue.

Bell: STOP CALLING ME THAT

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aight both of you quiet

HEY! whats your profile picture Woods doing? taking a leak?

JAY PLEASE

please he's standing over arash in the trailer i'm gonna say a cuss word SO LOUD

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Mason, on the phone: Hey, Woods! David and I are heading home now, we had a blast at the pumpkin patch!

Mason: Didn't we, buddy?

Mason: [looks over at the pumpkin in the passenger seat beside him]

Mason: i'm gonna have to call you back

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HEY! whats your profile picture Woods doing? taking a leak?

JAY PLEASE

please he's standing over arash in the trailer i'm gonna say a cuss word SO LOUD