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The Argentine, I understand. That’s right, sir. Have you ever visited it yourself, sir? No. No. England for me.

Maurice (1987) dir. James Ivory   

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asking "hey is it fine if I smoke in here" and before you're able to answer I've already set up a full rack of salmon over a fire in your living room

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mood for the day

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Sylvia Plath, "The Disquieting Muses"

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"tumblr's the only social media without algorithms!" "you can still be anonymous on tumblr!" "tumblr's so nice because you don't have to show your face!" WRONG tumblr is special because you can have 3000 followers and still get an average of seven likes a post. i'm doing stand up comedy at a packed venue and one person is laughing

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My brain is stuck on 'In Memoriam'

Okay the In Memoriam brain rot is real. I haven't stopped thinking about this book still, so I need to pour out my thoughts. I've made a collection of some of my favourite call-backs between chapters.

Page 6 "Ellwood rubbed a small flat spot on his nose with one finger. He often did that. Gaunt wondered if Ellwood resented that he had punched it there."

Page 119 "whenever Ellwood touched the flat spot Gaunt had punched into his nose, he remembered: there was something inside the fortress."

Gaunt thinking Ellwood resents him for marking his nose because of his vanity, but really Ellwood touches it when Guant's being particularly stubborn to remind himself that one time he was able to break through Gaunt's walls.

Page 8 "I haven't had a compliment from you in about three months. I know, because I always write them down and put them in a drawer."

Page 43 "You will say I am dramatising, but I wrote it all down. I write everything down."

The first quote being said in jest and a fleeting thing. But then Ellwood doubles down on the fact he does indeed write everything down, and you really do believe that he's got a drawer full of written down compliments from Gaunt.

Page 53 "I never call him by his Christian name. (How could I? Call him Sidney, as his wife will one day)

"Gaunt never called that, I don't think he felt close enough to me"

"My Dearest, Darling Sidney" "I promised myself long ago that I should never call you that unless I was sure I could keep you" "'Sydney,' said Gaunt, so quickly as if he had been waiting years to say it."

As if he had been waiting years. YEARS guys. And HE HAS been. The wreck that I was after reading "My Dearest, Darling Sidney."

"I know you're fine Gaunt, but are you alright?"

Page 9 "Whereas Gaunt, [...] feared that ugliness was too important to ignore."

"The loss of his eye had been what guaranteed his life and so, to Gaunt, it was beautiful."

Gaunt just being the thoughtful soul that he is and seeing beyond the objectiveness of beauty.

Also, Ellwood reciting every bit of poetry at Gaunt to tell him that he loves him, and Gaunt basically being like I can't understand what you're saying. Just spit it out in real words. Only for Ellwood to lose all the verses from his head to then end their story with, "I—I cannot heave my heart into my mouth.'" And Gaunt finally, finally just KNOWS.

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WELL i have a new brainrot and it’s gauntwood from „In Memoriam” by Alice Winn, so here’s some small silly doodle with them

(im going feral)

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‘It was the Hell you’d feared in childhood, come to devour the children. It was treading over the corpses of your friends so that you might be killed yourself. It was the congealed evil of a century.’

— In Memoriam, Alice Winn

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fun fact sometimes languages sound weird to u because they're not commonly spoken, and sometimes they're not commonly spoken because a concerted effort was made in the past to eradicate them from existence. so. maybe not something to play into.

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Bangs my head into wall Bangs my head into wall Bangs my head into wall Bangs my head why am I so bad with people

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be honest with me now, pard

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on galveston island

down on galveston island i felt something that day.

in the book store when you squeezed beside me in the narrow isle

and hummed into my cheek as i read the summary of a war book.

i felt something when your minty eyes stared up at me from that rigidy wooden chair as i spit up the plot of some romance novel.

on galveston island i felt something as i watched you from above, leaning over a box of vinyls from the antique store.

and i felt something when you "blessed me" after i sneezed from the dust on the porcelain dolls i admire so much.

on galveston island i felt something when you walked just close enough in the streets.

and how you'd clutch my denim jacket when you thought i'd cross in front of the trolley.

and i felt something in that humid slippery restaurant, the one with the good tacos and lemonade.

i stared at you from across the table and gawked at how your bangs never seemed to stick from the oily atmosphere, as my hair had frizzed.

on galveston island i felt something when you hugged me.

your sticky summer skin against mine.

yes, down on galveston island my emotions high on its low elevation, i don't think ive ever felt more adoration

-M.M.V.

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I got blood inside my phone charging port and now it only works 50% of the time

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chillin on a Saturday night

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Our Lover (Ao3) is away at war (down for maintenance) and We don't know when they'll return (it's scheduled for about 3 hours)

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Tanner decided that the antlers were the most comfortable place to sleep.