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you tell any adult over the age of 50 that you're looking for a job and they're frothing at the mouth to offer insight bc they think your young and/or lazy ass has never even conceived what they're about to tell you. and it's printing your resume onto a very disposable piece of paper and walking into the workplace and handing it to a random employee

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biggest L i've had to take from morning people is that the hours between 5 - 9 am really do have 7x as much time in them than the ones between 9 pm - 1 am and you can get your whole day's worth of shit done by noon

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A good rule of thumb for AI is "would you trust a trained pigeon to do this?"

"We trained a pigeon to recognise cancerous cell clusters and somehow they're really good at it" okay great, that's something that could plausibly be a thing.

"We trained a pigeon to recognise good CV:s and left it in charge of sorting through all our job applications" uh perhaps consider not doing that.

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Bad literary idea: Slaughterhouse-Five, but every instance of "So it goes" is replaced with "Many such cases"

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Just thought you should know that hasbro has announced an official long furby

No this is not a joke

Kids these days. Back in my day we had to put the long in the furbies ourselves. We had to skin the furbies for tumblr. There was no other choice.

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i love when people get so online that they start talking about how you shouldnt call yourself a pervert if youre only into normie shit like petplay and erotic hypnosis

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Dracula Daily Year 1: Aww, our good friend Jonathan is poor little meow meow.

Dracula Daily Year 2: Our good friend Jonathan is in a legit horror story, and I have literary analysis to share.

Dracula Daily Year 3: We have created a metanarrative wherein not only is our good friend Jonathan in a legit horror story, but he is also cursed to live in a horrifying time loop until we stop doing this.

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The largest mass shooting in American history was a hate crime against gay people. Don’t ever forget that.

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I hate when a tiny stupid thing pushes you over the edge and makes you freak the fuck out because it makes you look like a completely irrational tar pit of a human being. Like no I promise this is warranted just maybe not about that specifically I swear I'm well adjusted. Come closer stick your fingers in my cage

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They should invent a way to sit hunched over doing crafts that is Good for your body

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Why is there a reddit for needing help on tumblr

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Blueberries - Teija Lehto

Finnish, b. 1965 -

Woodcut , 43 x 60 cm.

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I constantly manipulate everyone around me by calculating what would be the nicest thing to do in any given situation, making a point of doing it when it matters the most. This is supported by subtly, casually tailoring what I talk about to the person I'm speaking to, and saying what I think they may find funny or interesting. the really sick thing is I look just like a normal person and there's no way you can tell me apart from anyone. If I weren't such a monster I would be afraid knowing people like this are out there, but I know I'm on top and have nothing to fear.

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The Twilight Zone, 1963, dir. David Lowell Rich

SE04E14 Of Late I Think of Cliffordville