innerthoughtslibrarian

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Sir, trust me, I checked this morning to make sure you couldn’t see my cleavage; please look somewhere else

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

sir please do not trim your nails at the desks

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

when you’re worried about the incompleteness of your answer but the customer is happy anyway 🙌

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Sir, if you have the Plague, WHY ARE YOU HERE

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

my child, no matter how many times you tell me that you saw sour patch kids in the very candy bucket through which I am permitting you to dig, I am still incapable of conjuring sour candy out of thin air

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Sir if you knew the answer why did you just take up thirty minutes asking me?

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Sir this is not cellphone store; you cannot purchase minutes in here

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

I’m not stupid, but I have to ask you stupid questions because you would not believe the shit that I’ve seen

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Can someone please tell management that technologically illiterate people are incapable of signing up for computer classes online

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Sir I love literature as much as the next librarian but we do exist in a capitalist, technological society and there is not enough financing for us to continue as a quiet building filled with “just books”

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Ma’am that specific service is a courtesy, not a right

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

I’m sorry ma’am are you really asking for notary services ten minutes before closing?

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Actually sir, since you live out of county, your tax dollars do not pay for my job, so

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Yes they’ve never been to the library before and I get to tell them about ALL OUR COOL THINGS!!!

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Im sorry sir but I am not familiar with the street layout of a city halfway across the world please don’t get mad

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Sir I cannot override Facebook’s security features. No, I do not own Facebook. I know this is a struggle but have you perhaps tried talking to Facebook, with whom I have no connection?

[innerthoughtslibrarian]

Ma’am I am literally incapable of hacking your gmail account