innocent-until-proven-geeky

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Me when the story that obviously isn’t going to have a happy ending doesn’t have a happy ending

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Endlessly obsessed with the move of having Vulcans be Vulcan while also having a heat cycle so intense they can actually die from it. Imagine going to the omegaverse planet and everyone's just like. We don't talk about that.

[innocent-until-proven-geeky]

I absolutely agree that transmasculine people face different problems than transfeminine people, hmm I wonder if we could come up with a word to specifically describe the transphobic issues that transmasculine people have to deal with, perhaps something including the word trans and, like, a greek syllable meaning masculine, or something

surely such a word would be seen as a good thing to have at ones disposal to talk about one's own oppression

hmmm

This is a bad faith ask, but I guess it's as good a place as any for a ramble. I hope it's coherent.

First off, I feel like my blog is getting lumped into a lot of other blogs as a "trans woman who talks about transmisogyny" and points are being ascribed to me that I never really said. I respect them a lot, and I follow them. But I'm an individual person with my own nuanced opinions on the topic.

Also, yes, this will largely be a nitpicky terminology post. It's a a rambling societal analysis from someone with a STEM background. Don't call this "infighting". To be blunt, if you get riled up by this, that's on you.

Here's what you need to understand: transmisogyny is not called transmisogyny because it's transphobia affecting trans women. Transmisogyny is called transmisogyny because it's the manifestation of existing misogynist biases and talking points, applied to trans women. Creating the term "transandrophobia" as an equal foil to it is implying existing, pervasive androphobia against cis men.

Per the original use of the terminology (I'm literally just poorly summarizing Whipping Girl here, which is basically transfeminism for dummies), transmisogyny exists because of two related, but distinct deeply ingrained biases of misogyny:

One, the societal belief that male/man and female/woman are separate categories with a MASSIVE, uncrossable rift between them, and are intrinsically different as completely separate biological or theological categories (this is termed oppositional sexism)

Two, with respect to these two categories, men and masculinity are superior to women and femininity.

Transgender women assault both of these points to create a massive reflexive disgust reaction in a misogynist. One, they break down the barriers between men and women. And two, they provide examples of somebody "choosing" womanhood, and being uplifted and empowered by it. The first point is something we share with trans men, but let's hold on to that point for a moment.

As I've said before, transmisogyny then manifests as a property of this reaction. The second point leaves people scrambling to think of "alternate explanations" for a trans woman's transition- leading to false accusations about why trans women want access to women's spaces, that trans women are fetishists, and that trans women want to "cheat" in women's sports.

Does this mean that trans men don't have unique struggles, or that we shouldn't fight for transmasc's struggles? Of course not. However, these struggles are not an emergent property of a societal hatred of men.

Instead, a lot of what trans men face feels to me like repackaged misogyny. THIS IS NOT SAYING THAT TRANS MEN ARE NOT MEN, OR THAT ALL TRANSMASCS ARE ACTUALLY WOMEN. This is an acknowledgement that misogyny is a system of biases that aims to create a patriarchy. Those biases have the goal of male superiority, and oftentimes, hit trans men as well- because a system that needs to tell men that they're "biologically superior" is one that can never allow an "inferior" person to put themselves in that category.

Eg: trans men are often forced into positions where they're treated as women, often violently. This is to maintain the separation of men and women, and to assert men as superior. Trans men are affected by reproductive health regulations written to suppress women, sexual violence intended to suppress women, etc.

Some of these mechanisms often also affect trans women. Particularly sexual violence and sexualization.

And some don't. Some are genuinely unique to transmascs. And if you want to use the word "transandrophobia" to describe all of them in one go, then sure I guess. It's not a huge deal, but you have to acknowledge that we're talking about something almost entirely different at that point. But, if you're portraying trans androphobia as the genuine one-to-one equal of transmisogyny, with the same roots and same usage, you're also saying that societal androphobia exists. Which, to be frank, it does not- as a societal force. I'm sure you have a cousin or a great aunt that genuinely believes in some kind of matriarchal state, but c'mon. They're not mainstream in any political movement, no, not even TERFs.

Talking about transmisogyny isn't about erasing trans men's issues, it's about recognizing the misogynist roots of transphobia to more accurately hold fast against it, find solidarity with other feminists, and restructure communication to people outside of our movements.

And yeah, I am going to uplift trans men, and talk about issues affecting them. Saying I don't is ascribing a lot of things to me that I'm not saying.

This is the dignified part of my response. I'm typing my more irate, hysterical thoughts here, but I genuinely hope this opens some respectful discussion.

Part 2 of this post will be what I'm mad about, and what my frustration is.

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quiz: why do lobsters have one claw bigger

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For all of the northerners that stood up for Texas during our freeze and said, "Don't make fun of them, they've never dealt with this before. Their infrastructure isn't made for snow and freezing."

This one is for you.

Where I live 108°F with 80% humidity with no wind is normal.

Pacific North West is dealing historic best waves 35-40°C or 95-105°F.

First of all. Don't make fun of them for bitching about the heat. Just like Texas isn't built for a freeze and our pipes burst, Pacific North West isn't built for heat and a lot of their homes don't have AC.

If you live somewhere with a high humidity like 80+ HUMIDITY IS NOT YOUR FRIEND. The "humidity makes it feel cooler" is a lie once it gets beyond a point.

If you live somewhere with a lower humidity, misters are nice to cool off outside.

Once you get over 90°F (32°C) a fan will not help you. It's just pushing around hot air. (I mean if you can't afford a small AC unit because they're expensive as hell, by all means a fan is better than nothing).

If you have pets, those portable AC units aren't safe. If your pets destroy the outtake thing, it'll leak CO2. Window units are safer.

Window AC units will let mosquitoes or other small bugs in. Sucks, but that's life.

Now is not the time to me modest. If you have to cover for religious reasons, by all means. If you don't, I've seen people wear short shorts and a swim top. It's not trashy if it keeps you from getting heat stroke.

If you do have to cover up for religious reasons, look for elephant pants or something similar. They're made with a breathable material.

Shade is better than no shade, but that shit it just diet sun after some point. Don't think shade will save you from heat stroke.

I know the "drink your water" is a fun meme now, but if you're sweating excessively you need electrolytes. Drink Gatorade, Powerade, or Pedialite PLEASE. I don't care if you're fucking sitting in one spot all day. That shit WILL save you from heat stroke.

Most importantly. RESEARCH THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HEAT STROKE AND HEAT EXHAUSTION PLEASE!

If you're diabetic and can't drink Gatorade, mix water, fruit juice, and either lite salt or pink salt

If you can afford it, cover windows with thick curtains to insulate the house

If you have tile floors, lay on them with skin to tile contact. If you don't, laying your head on cool counters works too.

If the temperature where you're at is hotter than your body temperature, don't wear heat wicking clothing. Moisture wicking is safe though.

Check your medication labels. Many make you more susceptible to sun and heat

-Room temperature water will get into your body faster. This is something I learned doing marching band in high summer in Georgia, and it saved all of our asses. Sip it, don't gulp it, especially if you're getting into the red; same goes for whatever fluid you're drinking. And just in general drink during the day.

-If you are moving from an air conditioned space to an un-air conditioned space, if at all possible try to make the shift gradual. When my dad and I were working outside and in un-ac houses a few years ago, he'd turn the air down to low in the truck about ten-fifteen minutes before we got where we were going. This way your body doesn't go from low low temps to high temps. S'bad for you.

-If you can, keep your lights off during the day. Light bulbs may not generate a lot of heat, but the difference is noticeable when it gets hot enough. I literally only turn my bedroom light on in the evening when it gets too dark.

Don't be afraid to just like... pour water on yourself if you need to. The evaporation will cool you off.

Put your hand to the cement for 15 seconds. If you can't handle the heat, it'll burn your dog's paws. Don't let them walk on it.

Dogs with flat faces are more prone to heat stroke. Don't leave them out unsupervised.

Frozen fruit is delicious in water.

Wet/Cold hat/handkerchief on your head/neck will help you stay cool.

Pickle juice is great for electrolytes! You can even make pickle juice Popsicles!

Heat exhaustion is more, "drink water and get you cooled off." Heat stroke is more "Oh my god call 911."

Image Description provided by @loveize

[Image description: an infographic showing the difference between heat exhaustion and heat stroke. The graphic is labeled "Heat Dangers: First Warning." Signs of heat exhaustion: faint or dizzy, excessive sweating, cool, pale, clammy skin, rapid, weak pulse, muscle cramps. If you think you or someone else may be experiencing heat exhaustion, get to a cool, air-conditioned place, drink water if conscious, and take a cool shower or use cold compress. Signs of heat stroke: throbbing headache, no sweating, red, hot, dry skin, rapid, strong pulse, may lose consciousness. If you think you or someone else may be experiencing heat stroke, call 911. End description]

Be safe.

-fae

[innocent-until-proven-geeky]

thanks for your explanation about the roots of transmisogyny and ergo why transandrophia doesnt make sense as a counterpart - found that explanation enlightening.

as a trans man, there’s another piece to the misogyny ive faced that maybe you have thoughts on? since i was raised and treated as a woman for the first two decades of my life, i was often considered less capable or less worthy of awards/promotions/etc just for being a “woman”. now that i pass, i experience male privilege, but underneath that, i still have all the setbacks of 21 years of misogyny (setbacks that my trans sister, for example, never faced. not trying to play oppression olympics here to be clear!). so i have male privilege in the present moment but not the snowball effect that cis men have.

anyway, i appreciate your clear and thoughtful breakdown of how these structures of oppression operate, and am interested in any thoughts you might have on this angle

So yeah, these are thoughts I've grappled with a lot, and honestly get really personal. They're also thoughts that I talk to a lot of cis women about, and is a reason why I think it's important for trans women to have more solidarity with cis women.

Misogyny does affect trans women pre-transition, let's be clear. Vilification of feminity and being branded as "faggotgender" are manifestations of misogyny as well, and trans women will often have this experience. I was, and the series of incidents that I consider my worst interactions with transmisogyny were actually technically pretransiton, when I was questioning and tepidly telling people that.

With that out of the way, that experience is MUCH different than what most transmascs and cis women go through. One compare and contrast I've made with some cis friends is their first experiences with sexualization. I was first nonconsensually approached and followed by a man in public when I was 26 years old. For my cis friends, it was as early as 11.

That does shit to you. That's trauma inducing. I'm not going to deny that it is, because that would be horrifying.

Cis women have also had to deal with exactly what you said: not being taken seriously as a professional for years. Trans women don't necessarily have that until they transition.

The flip side of this, however, is that trans women face misogyny in ways that are far more silent and isolated than cis women.

Alongside their horror stories, my cis friends have also told me of the support: mothers, sisters, friends, community members, older women who protected them, pulled them aside, gave them love and sympathy, attacked the men who targeted them, and gave them advice on how to keep their head up in the face of sexual danger and professional sexism.

Trans women, more often than not, get none of that.

There was no one to defend me or sympathize with me the first time I got sexually assaulted. No one believed me when I noticed people rapidly taking me less seriously after I socially transitioned. No one believed that I was "enough of a woman" to get catcalled.

Slowly, over time, that changed. But it changed because I had open and honest conversations about it with people- and I would say I have a strong network of friends and supporters now, precisely because I've engaged with the different ways this has affected us.

It's all a balance. I'm not doing anything oppression Olympics here, and neither are you! These are important experiences to compare and contrast. In fact, let's take that lack of support I mentioned: the first people I started getting support from, were the same cis women telling me those sorties. Breaking down the barriers, talking openly about how to navigate a misogynist world, and restating that yes, the force we're feeling is misogyny is a super important thing to bring into your day to day life.

Bit of a personal pontification and guilt under the cut.

This cuts at a bit of guilt I've been feeling recently.

I graduated high school as a man.

I got admitted to my undergrad as a man, and started research there as a man.

I got my Bachelor's of Science as a man.

I got my first Masters of Science as a man.

I was admitted to a PhD program as a man.

I transitioned.

I dropped out as a woman.

I've felt a lot of complicated feelings of failure and guilt around this. They're deeply rooted to other parts of my life too personal to talk about on tumblr. But... Yeah. This is all part of it. And yeah, I do see how I was propped up in the past, and how much of that I've lost.

Along the way, I had a lot of silent oppression as well. But I still don't talk about those, and to the world, it still looks like I became a woman and immediately crumpled. What kind of message does that send?

Idk. I know this is dumb. But yeah. Shit sucks.

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Our neighbors are getting a new driveway poured today. The guys pouring it have been listening to music all morning, which is unremarkable by itself except for the fact that the constant stream of Mexican rock music just got interrupted by the Muppet theme song followed by Paul McCartney's "We All Stand Together."

Which I like to think would make anyone say, "What?" out loud before getting up to look over the fence. Only to find one of the guys showed up with his kid, and now the old guy in charge of the music is playing what I can only define as 'Eighties Kids Music' while the little kid runs in circles in the shade.

I don't know who is having a better time. The kid or the old guy picking the tracks 😂

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#the frustration is real

DOCTOR WHO | 1.08: THE WITCHFINDERS

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every prehistoric human reconstruction has me thinking “I want to smoke weed with this bitch”

she looks like she would have been an awesome neighbor, like she would have loved menthols and called me baby

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Could yall stop shooting each other outside my window im trying to masturbate

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I spotted a reply to one of my posts:

And my knee-jerk response was "no, you should hear my friends talk about their lives--"

And it made me remember something.

Back in high school, my IB class did a lock-in-- where the group of students gets locked into one part of the school overnight on a weekend-- and after junk food and video games lost their appeal, we got to talking.

Only I didn't really know anything about almost any of them. They were all friendly enough, but I kept to myself for the most part, so we didn't have much to talk about once standard small talk ran out.

So I asked one of the other people sitting with me: "what's your story?"

Your life story.

And he told me. Sixteen years or so condensed into maybe a half hour. And it was the most fascinating life I could have imagined: the places he'd been, the things he'd done, the experiences that defined him. It boggled my mind.

When he finished and turned the question around to me, I thought mine sounded really boring in comparison, but he listened open-mouthed to the entire thing. Other kids were gathering around us by now, listening in. And when I finished mine, I turned to another one of them and asked the question to them.

And just like before, my mind was blown. A completely different life, completely different focal points, defining experiences, goals the likes of which were deserving of an anime. And the same happened with the next person we asked, and the next.

By the time each one of us had finished telling their story, it was time to go home for the morning. The video games had been abandoned hours ago. None of us had slept. We were too caught up in each other's lives.

All of which is to say:

Thank you. I do lead a very interesting life.

So do you.

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say what you will about the reserve bank of india these are some cracking coins

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at a conference I attended recently, a researcher pointed to the difficulty of finding material in archives because so much depends on the metadata and the terminology used to describe things changes over time. "it would be so helpful," the researcher said, "if I typed 'lesbian' into the library of congress database, it would also show me results that were categorised in the 50s, when the materials were interpreted as 'intimate female friendships'"

which is what tag wrangles at Archive Of Our Own do incredibly effectively: searching for "omegaverse" also leads to "alpha/beta/omega dynamics" and "alternate universe: a/b/o" and so on. but ao3 achieves this frankly incredible categorisation and indexing system by the power of countless volunteers putting in hours and hours of unpaid and unthanked free time, and it's completely understandable that most archives do not have that kind of infrastructure, but also how incredible that a fan-run website has better searchability, classification, and accessibility than the library of congress

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y'all it's about to get really fucking humid and hot