insufficienthyperfunction - Tumblr blog

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me staring at my calculator app for 45 seconds before i remember i was trying to open my clock app to set an alarm

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health and safety section of barista training had a question about dealing with pests, one of the multiple choice answers to which was "call the police", which immediately reawakened the memory of "no way i'm not gonna narc on my buddy" in me like a sleeper agent activation phrase

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oh and that gap in my resume is when i was digging my own grave

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Endlessly diabolical how you can't say words like rape and suicide uncensored without either being criticised by idiots or punished by conglomerates.

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no offense but if i exit out of a program that program should close. none of that running in the background shit.

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I don’t have to worry about "chemicals you can’t pronounce" in my food and my shampoo because I can pronounce every chemical flawlessly and without effort. Butylated hydroxytoluene. Ethylenediaminetetraacetic acid. Fenugreek. I am saying these out loud and laughing at you. I’m immune to all known carcinogens. I can never die. Fight me.

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It is imperative that you assemble a collection of tumblr mutuals who are vocal about their deeply specific, highly involved kinks that you don’t share at all. If you humble yourself with the diversity of the human experience enough you can become inoculated against reactionary puritanism permanently

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It IS true that being on here gives you a tumblr accent. This morning my mother asked me something and i replied "i don't know i've never heard these words in that order" and she nearly choked laughing. It wasn't even that funny

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what the fuck is going on

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I see a lot of posts saying "teach boys about consent".

While that is true, a lot of parents will do that and fail to see how their own actions are the problem.

If you've spanked him, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've forced him to sit on Santa's lap, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've forced him to give hugs and kisses to family members, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've grabbed him in order to force him to sit still, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've labeled him as "too sensitive" for not wanting to be touched, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you've assumed he's okay with something because he technically allowed it even though he felt pressured, he's less likely to understand consent.

If you're only going to criticize his actions but not your own, it won't work.

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maybe hobbies and nights alone as an adult are so difficult because i spent so much time “entertaining myself” as a child when really i was crying out for someone to be there with me. idk maybe i’m just a pussy tho

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“ew thick water gross and weird” ITS NOT FUCKING FOR YOU!!!!! “ew why buy pre-cut vegetables when you can cut your own” ITS NOT FUCKING FOR YOU!!!!!! “I don’t need a device to help me put my socks on I’m not lazy” ITS NOT FUCKING FOR YOU !!!!!!!!! “Why drink liquid meals when you can cook them” ITS!!!!! NOT!!!!!! FOR!!!!!! YOU!!!!!!!!

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i need to eat a food. none of the food in the house is The Right Food. what is the right food? only god knows. and we're not on speaking terms right now.

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White Feminism

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