iramtamez-blog

[iramtamez-blog]

[iramtamez-blog]

scared.to read or not or read.

I have a few things to get off my chest. I have PTSD, BPD, GAD, panic disorder with agorphobia and depression....totally not ashamed of my mental insablitys. recently ....and by recently i mean the 7th of july i found out i was pregnant (not my first pregnancy). first pregnancy was perfect, besides the butchering of my labia (seriously) and my second pregnancy ultimitly ended in a D&C. i had huge problems with my primary care whom never listened when i exspressed issues and concerns, i had abdominal pain vaginal bleeding ect. ect. i was sent home and told it was normal everytime i went (4 times) i was still very early in my pregnancy about 9 weeks. The last time i went to exspress concerns was due to the fact i was 99.9% i had a bladder/kidney infection , i know my body well....and have also had chronic kidney and bladder infections since childhood. anyways i peed in a cup and was sent to a lady for birthing plan stuff, while i was with her i exspressed my concerns (she actually wanted to look into it to atleast ease my mind) well i finally got a ultra sound....only to know something was wrong...(the lady would not let me see the screen and no pics) i waited and waited finally doctor came to give me the news of my loss and proceded to tell me my pain was not due to an infection but actaully my misscarriage. this was the first misscarriage i was aware of so i thought hmmm maybe it is miscarrige pain. they sent me home as i requested to have my miscarriage natrually. 3 days in the worst pain of my life....i was almost sure i was dieing. my husband forced me to go to urgent care.(so thankful) he had to clothe me as i was stuck in fetal postion due to the gut wrenching pain. there at uc i was asked if i had been taking anibiotics for my bladder infection. i was told i didn't have one, so there for i was not prescribed. I was admitted after an 2 hours of iv antibiotics and fluids, the pain would not stop. i was in UC for a week on heavy duty antibiotics and pain medication (IV Dilaudid) morphine has no effect on me. i was told i had a strong uti strain that traveled to my kidneys and also E.coli and me becomeing septic was a possiblity. wost week of my life. after all of that i had a D&C to insure no further infections. my issue now is im pregnant agian and i am terrified i found out via home pregnancy test.....and have not been to the doctor ( as i know some woman do wait) i am taking care of myself and on my vittys .....anyways i have no choice but to be seen at the same place. i am so paraniod because soon i will have my first apointment and i do have legit concerns such as , constant headaches , constant nasuea , constant back pain. lierally constant. but i am so scrared. everytime i have gone in the past i have always been treated diffrently. They bring out the worst in me.The reason i have no choice is i am on tricare (my husband is in the navy), if i want free health care i have to be seen at military faciltys , if i go anywhere else there is copays and tricare only covers so much. my husband and I cant afford those extra exspenses due to he fact we will have to get ready for a new baby (if nothing goes wrong) and we will also be moving to a new state not long after the arivial so nothing to spare. im stuck with these people....and just thinking about going sends me into a panic.  read or don't read .....i had to vent, get it off my chest or whatever. gtg stick my head in the toilet.

[iramtamez-blog]

Mike….. Why did you pretend to love my best friend? What was it about minors you loved so much? How did you pretend to be a “good guy” so well? Why did you request my help on proposing to angel? Why did i ever trust you? Why did you steal me. Steal my body. My 14 year old body. I’m 20 and still trapped in there. Why did you abduct me? Why did you beat me? Why did you rape me? The blood… The throw up… The confusion… The paralyzing pleads and begs… The numbness…. The blackouts…. Why. I died that night. Dissociated. Lost. 6 years. Still.

#why

[iramtamez-blog]

Dad? .....it irks me to call you that so.... JR? ....why did you abandon me? What is so special about her kids? Or is it the meth that keeps you around them? Why did you sale all of my school supplies and my barbie bean bag that i bought with my hard earned money. Why did you choose the drugs over me. Why did and do you continue to get my hopes up of a actual relationship with you. Its like pop goes the weasel with you. Go away leave me alone.

[iramtamez-blog]

Mom.? Why when i call and by the off chance you actually answer.....its all about you? Why is it when i try to talk about me, i have to ask a thousand times if your listening .....and your phone end is silent. I hang up and we don't communicate for 3 more weeks.

[iramtamez-blog]

My insomnia is real as ever.....i cant sleep at night. I have come to a point were i don't want to sleep. The dreams are to painful, I can no longer bare them. Its been 6 fucking years. I cry. Silently next to my husband. I don't want to wake him. I'm pathetic.

[iramtamez-blog]

Hi ^-^ …..set of french nails

Need Mesh by Ms_Blue

DOWNLOAD

[iramtamez-blog]

YOUBETTERWORKBITCH112 - SXSW DREADLOCkS [DOWNLOAD] real look 

Tag your pics with the hashtag #monsternoirsims and #youbetterworkbitch112, so we can see how this hair look on your sims :)

CREDITS:

Mesh: Youbetterworkbitch112

Texture: Me

Control: Me [Action by #aWT]

▓ W/out custom thumb

▓ DISABLED FOR RANDOM AND MATERNITY.

▌YA>ELDER - MALE/FEMALE ▌

[iramtamez-blog]

IVY LIP KIT #4 + #5

by @ivyriva​ (made for rp blog)

My fourth pack includes 3 shades

iThrone

iLily ( *wink* @lily-pierce)

iSoul

My fifth pack includes 3 shades

iHera (@herademarchelier)

iNherit

iAleXO (for Ivy’s lil sis)

I will track this hashtags #ivyriva #ivylipkit and #janesfourthcupcake

Download MESHES for deco boxes [here]

Download lip kits and deco boxes [Simfileshare]

Download first pack [here]  Download second and third pack [here]

[iramtamez-blog]

CC Finds #1 - Livingroom

Hello everyone ! 

Some of you asked me to do a CC shopping video, so here it is ! I made a simple decorated living room with natural and pastel colors to show you a very small part of what’s in my game. Every direct links are below. You can also download the complete room if you want to install it in your game too like it is in the video. I hope you enjoy and happy simming <3 

Credits : 

@mio-sims ; @sanoysims ; @dreamteamsims ; @lindseyxsims ; @buffsumm ; @sweetmint-sims4 ; @deviliciious ; @koposov ; @msteaqueen ; @mxims @rachelssimstuff

* DOWNLOAD *

[iramtamez-blog]

Amelia Skin Overlay (TS4)

standalone

skin detail categorie

works with all skin tones

texture by me

DOWNLOAD

CC Used:

Hairs - Anto (retexture - me)

Eyebrows - Praline

Eyes - Sintiklia

Lashes - Kijiko

[iramtamez-blog]

TIE DYE HOODIES

A remake of my older ones using a different mesh created by sims4marigold. 

Comes in 2 textures

Custom thumbnails

Credit: sims4marigold (mesh)

! REQUIRED: For these to show up in CAS you’ll need the mesh HERE.

DOWNLOAD // message me for any problems

[iramtamez-blog]

19 Devonshire Street

Hello everyone ! After a few hours of work, I’m happy to share with you today my new London inspiration’s house. I hope you like it as I do and happy simming <3

* DOWNLOAD *

[iramtamez-blog]

                           ♥    POWERPUFF GIRLS    ♥

Buttercup 

top 

jeans

Blossom

top 

jeans

Bubbles

top

jeans

if someone want, I can put the girls to download, just ask me

[iramtamez-blog]

[Sims 4] iPad Air|Pro|Mini

iPad for your sims. Hope you’ll like this.

includes 3 mesh: Air, Pro and Mini

Category: Electronic/Computer 4 Swatchs

Download Here

[iramtamez-blog]

+1000 followers gift - Patterned wallpaper  ♡.

23 swatches.

Can be find under Wallpaper & available for all wall heights.

Tag me in your posts if you use them, I would love to see your sims in these.

DOWNLOAD (dropbox)

TOU. please do not re-upload or claim as your own.

credit - @madmono for the conversion

[iramtamez-blog]

Upper East Side District 2

This home is considered one of the oldest in the area and stays true to its historical values with the unbelievable character and charm.

You will need: Spa Day-Get Together

DOWNLOAD TOU

CC: |Door|Door2|Window|Window2|Window3|Wall|Wall2|Pediment|Column| |Floor|Fireplace|Kitchen|Light|Shelves|Clothes|