irishbreakfst - Tumblr blog

[irishbreakfst]

How to get your SHITTY FUCKING AMAZON TV to stop demanding you uninstall apps you're ACTIVELY USING to free up storage for their UNREMOVABLE APPS THAT YOUVE NEVER EVER USED

[irishbreakfst]

you think you’re a better kisser than me??? you think you’re a better cuddler? come over here and prove it punk

[irishbreakfst]

"We call it vff," said the alien. "It's - it's hard to describe to a species without vffsense. Imagine trying to describe light to a species that never evolved eyes. But there are forms of life that are only perceptible with vffsense, and they've visited Earth and fed on life as long as it's existed here."

There was a pause.

Then the human said, "That's the worst thing you've ever said."

"Don't worry about it."

"I think I have to, now."

"No, because - well - you have a species of spider which pretends to be an ant, correct? It's not capable of understanding the fact that it's mimicking an ant, but it instinctually mimics an ant in order to deter predators."

"Sure?"

"Humans produce a vff to mimic varths, predators only perceptible through vffsense. The organisms that would like to feed on you are terrified of varths, and so they leave you alone. You aren't aware you do it, you don't have the capacity to understand you're doing it, but you evolved to instinctually do it to deter predators you can't see."

There was a pause.

Then the human said in a very soft and thoughtful voice, "And are there varths on Earth?"

"Yes," said the alien. "Everywhere. But don't worry about it."

[irishbreakfst]

[irishbreakfst]

[sits up suddenly in a cold sweat] what if my corpse doesn't rot

[irishbreakfst]

good sensations can sometimes be extreme, and i know i personally enjoy a good few of those, so i wanted to know which of these types of pain are the most commonly enjoyed :)

basically my question is. am i such a touch deprived weirdo that i'll enjoy fucked up sensations no one else likes or am i normal

[irishbreakfst]

‘Autumn Vision’ by Victor Prouvé, c. 1899.

[irishbreakfst]

“what’s the song of the summer” ?? it’s DANCING IN THE DARK by bruce springsteen for the 40th year in a row

[irishbreakfst]

$10k until evacuation!!!

This Palestinian family is only asking for $10K to help them escape! That’s a goal that’s very manageable. Please donate, any amount counts, and if you can’t make sure to share!!!

[irishbreakfst]

interesting fact i have titanium in my spine

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[irishbreakfst]

The most wretched tragedy is that we let those 18th century ponytails with bow ties for men get out of style

[irishbreakfst]

It is done!

[irishbreakfst]

Greater Tokyo transit map

[irishbreakfst]

10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU (1999) dir. Gil Junger

[irishbreakfst]

girl what the fuck is happening to Drew Carey ?

[irishbreakfst]

“If you have time to watch Netflix you have time for a side hustle” my side hustle is relaxing so that my body and brain can heal from by this nose-to-the-grindstone bullshit. I refuse to feel guilty for being a human with the need to relax sometimes. my side hustle is no.