islifeoverafterfifty

[islifeoverafterfifty]

Lessons I learned in High School, (At Age 64)

Who would have thought that I would finally learn to love myself in high school? Not when I was a teenager, when peer pressure, cliques, gossip and a bad reputation can ruin a young girl, but at the age of 64. I can’t believe it – but it’s true – I went back to the high school I graduated from 47 years ago, to work in the front office this past year. And after years of chasing my elusive…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

The Softer Side of Dull

I recently became aware of a Facebook group called “Dull Women’s Club”, and it has close to 350,000 members!  I read a couple of the posts from different members and was (mildly) amused enough to join the group.  The content consists of people posting a photo of themselves and then describing the rather mundane lives that they are completely content with.  Members describe their favorite…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

Our Friday Night “Safety Meetings”

A few years ago, a group of us women, in – or approaching our sixties, formed to meet on Friday nights during Happy Hour. How it came about: One of the husbands of the women apparently attended a “safety meeting” on a weekly basis with a group of his men friends. This group held a certain degree of mystery – we wondered… did they really discuss safety topics? Were there guest speakers? Were…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

It’s Been 7 Hours and Thirty Days…

I keep counting the days. I think that — in my mind, maybe as the number grows – it will hurt less. But it doesn’t. Hurt less. It hurts different – every day the grief morphs into a new version of sadness, anger and barely-able-to-contain irritability. The Five Stages of Grief that you read about is a neat and tidy timeline. One where you progress from one stage to the next until you are…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

I Don’t Want to Live in “A Country Divided”

I have never been a person who talks politics. I’ve never been a person to state my party preference privately or publicly. I don’t even claim a political party; I have been registered as an Independent for as many as years as I can remember. I have always voted for a candidate not a party. There have been Republican politicians that I have liked or at least supported, and there are Democrats…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

I Love Being Old

It’s the best – Truly!  I had always sort of dreaded getting old, and dare I say – was even fearful. Seriously – to the point of preferring an early tragic death, (preferably painless because I am also afraid of pain and suffering) to avoid the inevitable decline of aging.  But lately, I have come to realize that aging happens slowly, seeping in a little bit at a time. I am pretty sure God is…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

Christmas is Hard…

The holidays are not all merry and jolly. In fact, for some, this is the hardest time of the year.  That is me – I am “some”. I delicately straddle the days leading up to Christmas and New Years – Wanting to enjoy the beautiful and fun parts: the decorations, lights, music, parties and young children’s wonder and delight over the prospect of Santa Claus making a visit to their house Christmas Eve…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

I Am Exactly Where I Am Supposed To Be Right Now

Do you ever have those moments, days, weeks, or years that feel like a never-ending doomsday? Maybe you got a flat tire on the way to work, or the suspicious-tasting salmon-skin sushi roll last night, landed you in the bathroom until the wee hours of the morning.  Or you keep getting sick; virus after virus, until you end up with a serious infection.  Maybe you get laid off from your job – right…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

What Do Our Halloween Costumes Say About Us?

A witch, a princess, a rock star, a super hero, a ghost, a zombie, a nurse, a fireman or a human-size taco? What will you be? It’s that time of year again – where we may or may not be dressing up for Halloween.  If we are not thinking about it for our kids – or grandkids, we may be thinking about a fun or scary disguise for ourselves.  Some people dress for their workplace – I always love that,…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

Longing to Belong

Belonging, longing to be longed for, longing to belong, longing to be loved and included.  These are the feelings and unattainable qualities I have chased for as long as I have had memories.  Other people usually do not see this; they see a friendly, outgoing and positive person. Someone who is likeable enough.  A person who strives to be fun, witty, and kind – and almost inevitably striving to…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

It’s Homecoming Season

Does going home to your childhood places comfort you? I have been doing a lot of coming home for the past 3 years. First, I returned to my home town of Petaluma after living in other cities, and in one case – another country, for the ten years prior to that. It would be an understatement to say that I was both chasing adventures while running away from things, people, feelings and difficult…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

Raw-Dogging: The No-Stimuli Way To Fly

Recently I have been hearing about a new trend called, “raw-dogging” in relationship to flying on airplanes.  This trend popularized by TikTok, is also known as, “barebacking” and involves taking a commercial airline flight, usually of at least two or more hours, with zero sensory stimuli.  This practice entails sitting through the duration of the flight with no in-flight entertainment, no…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

Second Date Update Stories

Okay – let’s just say it’s been a while since I had a first date. I have not actively pursued dating in a few years – I am actually quite content with my life and it no longer feels like something is missing that I need to seek out. I did, however, date quite a lot in the years before that – some were from dating sites, some were friend-referred dates, some were chance meetings in the grocery…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

The Things We Did Back Then… And Are Still Alive To Talk About It.

Ever been asked, “Why in God’s name did you drink out of a dirty garden hose when you were little?”  Because we weren’t allowed to come in the house once we were outside!  I was a child of the sixties – when we were home all day-every day in the summer, my mother sent us out right after breakfast and we didn’t get to come back in the house until it was time to wash our hands for dinner.  Even at…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

If You Had All the Money in the World - Where Would You Travel to First?

If I could give only one piece of advice from my own life – it would be to TRAVEL!  As with many others, I have not been able to travel much since COVID.  But this year I have at least three trips planned and I am beyond excited!  The packing and planning, the anticipation of the unknown, the ability to unplug from my daily schedule, and the new people I may meet.  I stay in touch with so many of…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

Advice I Should Have Listened To In The Last 50 Years

So many pieces of advice are given with all the best of intentions.  People who have experienced more life, (or a very different life than you), want to impart their hard-earned wisdom to make your path a little easier.  I find myself doing it; giving someone advice based on my own missteps.  But the reception given to this type of suggestion is usually tepid at best. If the person I am trying to…

[islifeoverafterfifty]

Pick Me, Choose Me, Love Me…

This memorable quote from Grey’s Anatomy iconic scene, where Meredith begs Derek, (McDreamy) to choose her over another love interest, resonates to my core. I imagine that people the world over, felt her pain, desperation, intense longing and lump-in-the-throat emotion, hearing Meredith asking point-blank to be the person Derek wants to love for all time. Oh! To be someone’s first choice… in…