its-captain-sir

[its-captain-sir]

you tell any adult over the age of 50 that you're looking for a job and they're frothing at the mouth to offer insight bc they think your young and/or lazy ass has never even conceived what they're about to tell you. and it's printing your resume onto a very disposable piece of paper and walking into the workplace and handing it to a random employee

[its-captain-sir]

Double Income No Kids used to be seen as a kind of lavish lifestyle, now it’s like…a requirement to have any remote chance at financial stability

[its-captain-sir]

one of my favorite moments of my mom is when i made her play undertale in 2021 on the switch and when she fought mettaton for the essay question “what do you like most about mettaton” she (agonizingly slow with the on screen keyboard) typed out “his sparkling wit”

[its-captain-sir]

well. i've been keeping myself busy i can tell you that much.

[its-captain-sir]

sorry to be brave on the internet but I think food labels should list every single ingredient and that there should be harsher penalties for mislabeling and deceptive labeling

[its-captain-sir]

continually astounded to learn that someone around me is actually for real christian. like. aren't you supposed to grow out of that

[its-captain-sir]

we need to legalise learning for adults

[its-captain-sir]

i don’t get ppl who are fine w period pussy. smelling like wet parking lot pennies

[its-captain-sir]

Hey everyone, remember that being sick or healing from injuries is a hard time for your body. You have to eat a lot and lay still and be kind to yourself! [large neon sign that says HYPOCRITE descends from the ceiling and points at me] Hey what the heck what's this who put that there

[its-captain-sir]

fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this

[its-captain-sir]

[its-captain-sir]

Stolen from reddit where it wasn't being properly appreciated

[its-captain-sir]

“Hot and bothered” in the sense that it is 90 degrees out and I am extremely annoyed

[its-captain-sir]

worlds slowest fanfic author tries really really hard

[its-captain-sir]

worlds slowest fanfic author tries really really hard

[its-captain-sir]

worlds slowest fanfic author tries really really hard