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its-quiet-colter · 4 months ago

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AHHH I LOVE IT !! i’m so invested in this fic series and ough the reader gets to be a dad again 😭🥺🥺🥺

Lying eyes – Part 3

“Is it true that you and Joel are…” she begins, sounding a little uncertain before whispering the last part, “…gay?”

You never thought you'd have to lie to your daughter about something like this in your life, but here you are, wondering if you should be honest with her.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Male!Reader Word count: 14k words

Warnings: adultery, christianity, young!Joel Miller, SMUT!, 18+ MDNI!, fic takes place in mid 2000s, non-outbreak AU, reader is married and has a daughter, top! Joel Miller, bot! Reader, no use of Y/N

To part 1 — To part 2

“Is it true that you and Joel are…” she begins, sounding a bit uncertain before whispering the last part, “…gay?”

“No. Wh – … What made you think that?” You respond. Your eyes dart to the left before frowning as you study her expression, a slight panic spreading through your body as your stomach sinks, expecting the worst. There's a slight gleam in her eyes before they look down.

“Well… Mom wouldn't stop calling you two some… pretty tasteless words while speeding down the highway. Actually, she wouldn't stop talking at all, even when I tried to say something. She just kept going on and on about how disgusted she was by you and Joel being “lovey-dovey” – her words, not mine – and kept cussing you out in front of me. I just wanted her to shut up… And then she randomly told me that she's pregnant.”

“Huh. So she did.” Nodding, you think about what to say in this situation. You take a deep breath and rub your hand over your face.

“Did you know?” She reaches for your arm, her eyes staring at you.

You nod, trying not to overshare, and put your hand on hers. She's too young to go through all this anyway. But you need to know what else Bridget hasn't been able to hold in. So you ask in a quiet voice, “Did she say anything else?”

“Well, yes. She said it is my half-sibling. Like I said, she wouldn't stop talking, it actually scared me a lot…” She shudders a little at the memory.

“Come here.” You pull her in for a tight hug. “I'm sorry you had to go through that, Star. Thank you for talking to me about these things.”

She is silent for a moment, hugging you gently. You rub her back.

“Thank you.” Her voice is soft, muffled by your shoulder.

After a while, she stops hugging you.

“Dad?”

“Yeah?” You ask as your head tilts to the side.

“By the way… if. And only if you did happen to have feelings for my best friend's Dad… I wouldn't mind.” A mischievous grin tugs at the corners of her lips.

“Star.” You give her an annoyed look, realizing what she had just started.

“No, I mean it! I'd love to be Sarah's sister, she's the best. And Joel's ok too, I guess.”

“Alright, enough.” You roll your eyes and get up from the couch, hiding a small smile as you turn away from her. “Let's get ready for bed.”

“Noooooo, please tell me about your crush.” She stands up on the couch, jumping from one leg to the other. “I can tell you about mine if you tell me about yours.”

A sigh escapes your lips, you're already tired, so her usual playful teasing gets to you faster than usual. It's not because she's completely right in her assumption. She's pushed you so far that you're actually using your secret technique to get her to stop. By saying her first name in a stern tone. “Rosa. Bed.”

“Oh crap – ok, sorry, I won't say any more.” She gets off the couch and kisses you on the cheek before running upstairs to her bedroom.

“Good night!” You shout after her.

Before the door to her bedroom closes, you hear a faint reply. “Good night! Have some sweet dreams about Joel, Space Boy!”

With your mouth wide open, you're left standing there all alone, dumbfounded.

When did she grow up to be so cheeky with her old man?

You shake your head and look out the window, noticing a new car parked on the side of the road near your house.

Maybe one of the neighbors just got a new car.

You shrug and head upstairs after turning off the lights and locking the front door.

The divorce process takes much longer than you'd hoped. Bridget's idiotic action actually gets her in big trouble. The judge gives you and Rosa a restraining order against her in case she tries something similar again before her trial for kidnapping Rosa.

Even though this is a difficult time for you, you try your best to comfort your daughter as much as you can. She seems to be struggling a lot more, she doesn't have her usual energy and some days she even loses her appetite. But there's nothing an early birthday present and some father-daughter time can't fix. Her smile begins to make more appearances as time goes on.

During Bridget's trial, Rosa expresses that she no longer feels comfortable with her mother, voicing her inner thoughts and feelings about how Bridget's actions have affected her. She'd talked to you about this before the trial, too, and you'd encouraged her to be as truthful as possible when the time came.

Still, it felt strange to see her play all the cards in front of Bridget in court. You swear you could see your soon-to-be ex-wife's heart break as she testified. Oddly enough, you feel sorry for her. The hammer falls: Her sentence is 20 years.

She'll have a lot of time to think about what she did. The time in court with her isn't over for you, though. There have been some disagreements between you and Bridget over property that will have to be settled in court.

As the days and weeks pass, you notice the car you'd seen parked in front of your house, the one you'd dismissed as your neighbor's, everywhere. It feels like it's following you. But you don't really have much time to think about it, your own head is filled with the things going on around you.

Work keeps you busy, the final stretch of finalizing the divorce with Bridget is painfully close, so weekends are the only days you can relax and enjoy time with your daughter. She seems to be doing better after all of this, accepting her mother's absence and enjoying her time with her friends and with you.

You're glad you gave her the flip phone early. She texts you from time to time when she's out with her friends. And it always makes you laugh because she just sends the most random things she can think of.

It still takes you a while to get used to Bridget's absence. You miss her, you miss the woman she used to be. It's a kind of empty feeling, but it's followed by a certain pride and contentment. This bittersweet feeling follows you everywhere you go, like a loyal dog.

The Miller house always welcomes you and Rosa with open arms when things get unbearable. Sarah is as lively as ever. And then there's Joel. He plays the whole “just friends” part amazingly well.

To everyone else, it looks like there's nothing going on between the two of you. And there's some truth to that. The two of you are keeping your promise to wait at least until the divorce goes through. But the feelings you have for each other are still there.

And it's killing you.

The movie nights at his place have changed over time. Rosa and Sarah have joined you, which is probably for the best. You've fantasized about sitting alone with him, watching movies with a couple of beers in your system. It always ends with you needing a cold shower to cool off.

Tonight is one of those nights when you're glad you're not alone anymore. As you prepare some snacks, you find yourself alone in the kitchen with him. His gentle smile has an underlining longing to it. But so does yours. You exchange glances from time to time, your gaze wandering between his eyes, lips, and hands.

As you rinse the cutlery you used to eat a beautiful take-out dinner, the towel you reach for falls to the floor. You groan as you reach for it and catch a glimpse of him looking at your ass as you bend down to pick it up. He clears his throat before returning to his snack preparations. A smirk spreads across your face as you finish drying the last fork and store it in the drawer.

“Space Boy, what do you think about taking the girls to see Shrek 2 next weekend?” The smell of homemade popcorn fills the air as he pours it into a large bowl.

You laugh. You find the idea of Joel watching Shrek, of all movies very amusing.

“Shrek 2? Are you serious?” You gently close the drawer and hang the towel on the handle.

“Yes. I am. The first one was hilarious.” In a deadly serious voice, he crosses his arms before raising an eyebrow. “Are you too good for Shrek 2?”

“No, no. Not at all. Just didn’t think you’d like it, that’s all.”

“Isn't my whole thing that I love trashy movies?” He grabs the large bowl of popcorn and another smaller bowl of M&Ms.

“True. I'm sorry.” You grab the soda bottles he left out on the counter and follow him into the living room.

“Ah, the two knights in shining armor. Art thou ready to watch this?” Rosa blinks dramatically as she holds up the VHS box of Robin Hood, starring Kevin Costner. Joel still had old VHS tapes and the player at home. He didn't see the point of buying DVDs of movies he already owned.

“Yes, milady, but we need to, uh… get the beer from the… icebox.” You curtsy and place the bottles on the couch table.

Sarah and Rosa burst into laughter.

You leave them, smiling crookedly to yourself as you shake your head. When you take the two bottles of beer out of the fridge, the glass is cold in your hand. You close the fridge with your foot and make your way out of the kitchen, only to bump into Joel.

“Oof.” You almost lose your balance as you stumble back a little. Joel grabs your arm to keep you from falling back.

“Steady there. Don’t want the beer bottles to fall and spray everywhere.” He smiles, maybe holding on to your arm a little too long. Your glance lingers on his lips, noticing the slight twitch.

I wish I could kiss him right now.

You clear your throat and nod, “Thanks. I'd hate to have to clean up that mess.”

He finally lets go of your arm and rubs his palms over the fabric of his shirt.

“Got clammy hands, Miller?” You grin before stepping around him and heading back out of the kitchen to the girls. He joins you a minute later with four glasses, stepping around the guitar standing next to the couch. Sarah is rewinding the tape since the previous person who watched it forgot to do so.

“Do you need a bottle opener?” Joel asks as he sits down on the couch next to you and puts the glasses on the couch table.

“Nah, don't worry, I got it.” You wrap your thumb around the neck of the bottle, leaving about a thumb's worth of space between it and the cap, and use the top of the other bottle to open the first bottle. The cap falls to the floor. You put the open bottle on the table in front of you and pick up the cap.

“Impressive. Now, how are you going to open the second one?” His head tilts slightly to the side as he raises an eyebrow. Rosa watches you with amusement as Sarah continues to stare at the TV, waiting for the tape to rewind. You look around and notice a small remote, which you pick up and use with the same technique as before to open the second bottle.

With an even bigger grin on your face, you hold out the second bottle for Joel to take. He whistles and nods once before grabbing it and taking a big gulp.

“I don't know why you're so impressed, Dad. I've seen you open two bottles by kicking them together.” Sarah observes dryly, getting up from her spot on the floor as the tape is finished rewinding.

Joel chokes on his beer, which gets a laugh out of Rosa and Sarah. The girls share a knowing look before staring at him.

“I, er – I don't know how to – how to open them up like that, though.” He stammers, his cheeks turning a shade redder. You smile to yourself and grab your own bottle from the couch table.

“It’s called flirting, Sarah.” Rosa taunts you as she sticks her tongue out at you.

This time, it's you who's choking on the beer.

“Rosa!” You choke out, spilling some of the drink on your sleeve.

“Whaaaaat? Oh my God, Rosa, you're right!” Sarah gasps, covering her mouth with both hands.

“ Alright, you two. Enough goofing around, or we're gonna have to cut this movie night short.” Joel threatens, grabbing a napkin and handing it to you.

“Aw, you’re no fun.” Rosa protests as you wipe the beer from the sleeve of your shirt.

“Fine.” Sarah rolls her eyes and turns around.

You get up from the couch one last time to turn off the lights as Sarah hits play on the VCR player. Both girls make themselves comfortable on the floor with some blankets and pillows, so you join Joel on the couch.

He covers your lap with part of the blanket he's using himself, his eyes darting between the girls to make sure they're not looking before he slips his hand under it and secretly holds your hand underneath.

You intertwine your fingers with his, feeling his rough skin against your fingertips as they brush over his callouses.

The movie is fine.

You finish your beer rather quickly, which sends it straight to your head, your whole body now feeling fuzzy. Joel's hand squeezes yours tighter at an embarrassing moment. A smile spreads across your face. Out of the corner of your eye, you could swear you see a slight turn of Rosa's head. Your eyes peel away from the screen to look at her, but when you do, her head is turned to watch the screen.

With your free hand, you reach for some popcorn and snack on it.

Kevin Costner is not exactly the person you had in mind to play Robin Hood. And the fact that he doesn't even try to fake a British accent actively bugs you. But the story is your regular old Robin Hood tale. Guy steals money from the rich, has a love interest, shoots an arrow through another arrow. It's nothing special, but it's fun.

And yet, just like clockwork, the moment the movie starts to get interesting, you nod off, the conversations coming from the television muffled as your eyes involuntarily close. It's hard to stay present and awake. Your body, as well as your eyelids, feel extremely heavy.

It's a battle between you and sleep as they fight on the screen in front of you. And you lose that battle. Your body relaxes and you miss the end of the movie, only waking up when Joel gently shakes you.

When you wake up, you take a deep breath through your nose and keep your head leaning against whatever soft thing it's resting on.

“Space Boy…” Joel whispers close to your ear as he tries to wake you up.

“Hm…” You finally open your eyes. Your head is resting on Joel's shoulder, so you quickly straighten up and blink as you look around.

Rosa and Sarah are lying on the floor, asleep. You let out a sigh of relief before stretching your arms into the air.

“Sorry I fell asleep, Joel…” You apologize quietly so as not to wake the girls.

“It's alright.” He chuckles softly before adding in a whisper, “I've gotten used to it.”

“At least I wasn't the only one this time.” Smiling, you get up from the couch.

“Yep. They've been out cold about the same time as you.” He stands up, too, and switches on the standing light next to him and turns off the TV with the remote.

“I should probably head home. I can't sleep over tonight.” You gather the glasses and empty snack bowls as quietly as possible, then take them to the kitchen.

“Rosa can stay, though.” He comes into the room after you, holding the two empty beer bottles.

“Are you sure?” You turn to look at him and take a step back to keep your distance.

He smiles and nods before setting the bottles down next to the sink, the sleeves of his shirt riding up his bicep a little as he does so. “I'm sure Rosa would want to stay.”

You gulp down your spit before answering with a forced voice, “Yeah, you're right.”

His head is slightly lowered, wiping his hands on the towel you'd hung up earlier, his eyes glancing up and down at you as his smile fades. He clenches his jaw and thinks about convincing you to stay with him. Just for tonight.

You bite your lower lip nervously, your heart racing in your chest.

“I'll get going, then…” you mutter quietly as you make your way to the front door. You grab your jacket off the hook and unlock the door with your other hand.

You put your jacket on.

Joel accompanies you, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed. You step outside. The air is a little chilly. Just as you turn to say goodbye, a slight reflection catches your eye. There is that damn car again. And it's blocking half of Joel's driveway. You turn to Joel with a frown on your face.

“Joel. Please be careful.”

He shakes his head in confusion, frowning. “Yep?”

“Don't be too obvious, but do you see that car blocking your driveway? I've seen it parked around for weeks, maybe even months, but I've never seen anyone get in or out of it. Yet it always seems like it's there, kinda just waiting for me.”

Joel's gaze shifts for a second as he crosses his arms.

“If that car really is following you, I'm not too comfortable with you walking home alone.”

“I'm more worried that it's waiting for the perfect time to take Rosa…”

He remains silent for a short while, one side of his mouth pulling to the side as he thinks.

“I'll check if someone is in the car and ask them to move it. You go on home.”

You nod. “Thanks, Joel. Good night, see you tomorrow.”

“See ya, Space Boy. Let me know when you get home. And lock your doors.” With that, he pulls the keys out of the inside of the door and shuts it behind him. You make your way home, always looking back to keep an eye out for him. Your stomach turns with every step you take.

Joel walks toward the car with his hands in his pockets. When he's almost close enough to knock on the tinted windows, the headlights come on and the car drives off in the opposite direction you're going.

You stop and look at Joel and wave. He waves back, standing on the sidewalk watching you walk home. With the car out of sight, you breathe a sigh of relief and continue walking.

You get home safely and make sure to lock the front door twice before sending him a message.

That night is filled with nightmares of that car kidnapping Rosa and Sarah. You toss and turn as you run after it in your sleep. No matter how fast you try to run, your legs move as if you're just learning to walk. You're just about to catch up to the car, which stops at an abandoned mall.

There's gunfire. As you look in the direction of the sound, you see Joel lying on the ground, bleeding to death.

Your eyes shoot open as you sit up in bed. With a pounding heart and heavy breathing, you grab the covers and stare at the blanket. Seeing him on the floor, his eyes staring at you lifelessly, makes you afraid of losing him without telling him how you really feel about him.

Bridget could hire someone to assassinate him.

You shake the thought out of your mind. She wouldn't do such a thing. Even though she's done some questionable things recently. Besides, she's in jail and broke. You sigh and rub your hands over your face.

After calming down, you are able to fall back asleep.

Some time passes, days come and go. You go to the movies with the girls and Joel to see Shrek 2, and it isn't half bad. You're still stressed about the whole situation, your sleep is light, and your stomach hurts ever since Rosa was kidnapped, so you've started taking medication for anxiety. Thankfully, there have been no new sightings of the car, and the divorce between you and Bridget will finally be finalized next week.

That is, until this afternoon, when you begin to feel followed again.

A red car pulls up behind you and parks in front of your house, next to your driveway, as you return home from grocery shopping.

The thing that jumps out at you is that it has dark, tinted windows, just like the other car. Maybe it's here to finally take you out. But it's not the same car, so it could just be your paranoia acting up. You watch it for a while as you unload the car and notice that you never saw anyone get out of it. Keeping it in your line of sight, you notice Denise walking across the street on her way home.

“Hey, Denise!” You wave to get her attention. She stops and smiles at you.

“Hello!” She waves back.

You run towards her, still making sure not to let the car out of your sight.

“Listen, I know this is an odd question, but do you know whose car that is?” You point at it as you ask her.

“No, but I've seen it around lately.” After she turns to look at it, its engine starts and it drives off.

“That...was weird.”

“It was.” Her eyes squint as they follow the car.

“Shit. I shoulda written down the license plate in case I see it again.”

She quickly pulls out her mobile phone and hits the buttons on the keypad. “I think I remember, just a sec.”

“Oh, that's good. Could you send me what you remember then?”

“On it. And I'll be keeping an eye out too. I don't want anything to happen to the kids.”

“Yeah... We should ask people to do the same then.”

“Will do, I'll put up some flyers.”

“Thanks, Denise. I'll see you around.”

“See you.” She gives a little wave before heading home.

As the rest of the day passes, you notice some flyers warning the neighbors about the car appearing on the light posts outside. When Rosa comes home from school in the late afternoon, she asks you about them.

“Dad, have you seen the papers on the light posts all the way down the street to the cul-de-sac?” She takes off her shoes.

“I sure did. I talked to Denise about a car hanging around the neighborhood, and she came up with the idea.”

“Oh, that's kinda scary...” She hangs her jacket by the front door.

“Yep. Don't forget you can always call me or the police if anything bad happens, that's why you have your phone.”

“Hah, yeah. I think I'm slowly running out of credit though...”

“Ok, I'll get you some tomorrow after work. Make sure you don't spend any more until then, you can use the landline to call Sarah, I promise I won't listen in.” You cross your heart as you walk into the kitchen.

“Thanks, Dad.” She follows you and grabs an apple from the fruit bowl before washing it and giving you a peck on the cheek.

You do as you promised and buy her some credits for her phone on your way home from work the next day. Denise calls to tell you that some people have seen the car parked in front of Joel's and your house, which worries you, but you yourself don't see it anymore.

It's been three days since you last saw the car. And the weekend makes you even more excited about the coming week, because it may be the last time you'll have to go to court.

Just as you're leaving Mass that Sunday with Rosa, Pastor Jorge walks up to you and beckons you over.

“Excuse me, son. Could I have a moment of your time?” He fakes a smile, trying to remain professional in front of everyone.

“I'm sorry, Pastor, but I must be going.” You answer coldly, holding onto Rosa's shoulders as you try to leave the church with her.

He grabs your arm and stops you. “Please. It's important.”

You think for a minute and sigh, “... Fine. Rosa, wait for me with Mrs. Adler, I'll be right back.”

He guides you to his makeshift bureau in the church.

“Please, take a seat.” He gestures to the chair in front of his desk before sitting down in the chair behind it. Behind him, a huge painting of the Son of God looms over him, as if judging him for his mistakes.

You pull the chair back and sit down, your anger rising the longer you look at his face. He opens the drawer of his desk and searches for something.

“What did you want to talk about?”

“This.” He pulls out an envelope and takes out a stack of photos, placing them on the desk. Your confusion clears when you pick them up and look through them. They're photos of you, taken from inside a car. They're stalker pictures, basically. Some are of you hanging out with Rosa. With Rosa and Sarah. And finally with Joel.

The majority of them are actually of you and Joel. But they're all neutral. You get to the pictures of the night you watched the Robin Hood movie over at his place. How you're sleeping with your head on his shoulder while he's just watching TV.

“I don't understand. What are these?” You frown as you drop the pile of printed papers on the desk in front of you.

“I must apologize.” He retrieves the stack and slides it back into the envelope before folding his hands in front of his face.

“Yeah, tell me something I don't know.” You jab at him.

“I see the irony there. But no, that ain’t the only thing I need to apologize for.”

“Then spit it out. I don’t have all day, Pastor.”

“You see, Bridget contacted me from prison. She insisted that I hire a personal investigator on her behalf. To investigate your... relationship with Joel. Now, I know. I shouldn't have done it, but you have to understand, she was really persistent.”

His shoulders tense a little before he continues, “Nothing the P.I. brought back indicates anything going on between the two of you. I'm sure Bridget was just grasping at straws, so you needn't worry any further, I've called off the private investigator.”

You clench your jaw as your face slowly displays the anger that's been building in your chest and spreading throughout your body.

“You have the gull to hire a P.I. to stalk me when you know Bridget and I are getting a divorce because of your doing?!”

“… I am truly, very sorry. For the pain I’ve caused you and your family.”

You let out a snort of derision as you stand up to leave, but pause before opening the door.

“Before I leave. I just wanted to gently remind you that I could ruin your career in a heartbeat. Don't forget the position you're in, Pastor.” With that out of your system, you open the door and leave the church, looking for Rosa outside.

She's standing by the cars with Mrs. Adler, looking a little bored as the older woman keeps talking about something.

“There you are, dear!” Mrs. Adler's smile fades as soon as she sees your expression.

“What happened, Dad?” Rosa perks up and walks over to you. You take a deep breath and try to smile.

“Everything's fine, Star. Thank you for looking after her while I was away.” You gently touch Rosa's arm and nudge her toward your car.

“Dear, are you sure everything's alright?” Mrs. Adler tries to get anything out of you, shouting after you.

“Yes, don't worry, Mrs. Adler. Have a nice Sunday.”

Thankfully, she stops asking questions, but Rosa remains worried and waits until the two of you are in the car.

“What did Pastor Jorge want?” She asks as she fastens her seat belt. The rhythmic hum of the engine begins with the turn of the key. You remain silent, keeping your eyes on the road as you drive home.

“Dad? Did you not hear me?” She inquires once more.

With a wounded voice, you try to keep it together as you pull into the street where you live, “I did. I just... can't answer. I'm sorry, Star. Please give me time.”

“Alright... But don't make me call Joel again.” Her tone worried.

“Don't worry.” You park in the driveway of your house and pull the handbrake after you've turned off the engine.

“I'll be inside.” She kisses your cheek and caresses your arm before leaving you on your own in the car. You hold on to the steering wheel and rest your forehead against it, making sure to take deep breaths. The grip you have on the wheel makes an audible sound as the leather is pressed against the hard plastic underneath.

Minutes pass. But your anger lingers under your skin, like some leeches wriggling just below the surface. You need to get away from it all for a day.

As the motor of the car starts, you keep your foot on the clutch, grab your phone and call Rosa. She picks up within seconds, having probably been waiting for you to come into the house for a while.

“Hello? Dad?”

“Star, please call Joel and head over there. I'll be back later.”

“What –” You hang up and shift into gear to back out of the driveway. Rosa runs out of the house, watching you leave.

Your phone keeps ringing as you drive through streets with buildings on either side, the landscape soon changing to ranches and fields with various shrubs and trees. You pull into a parking lot next to a popular hiking trail and park.

As you take a deep breath, your phone rings once more, so you finally look to see who's calling. It's Joel.

You grab the phone and take the call, holding it to your ear as you get out of the car and walk down a trail you've been on before.

“Space Boy? Is everything alright?”

Hearing his voice calms you down a bit. As you continue walking, you take a deep breath and press the palm of your lower hand to your forehead.

“No, Joel. I’m fucking furious.”

“Did he answer?” You hear Rosa's voice asking in the background.

“Yeah, just give me a minute.” He answers her question. Your feet just keep walking, the sun pleasantly warming your skin.

“Ok, I'm alone now. What happened?” Joel's voice is full of concern.

You let out a frustrated huff. “Where do I start?”

“Why don't you start with what made you so upset?”

“Alright…” You take a deep breath, taking in the woody scents around you to calm yourself and collect your thoughts before continuing, “Remember I told you about the car that was following me a couple of weeks ago?”

“Yeah, the car that just drove off before I got to it?”

“Exactly that one. It was a personal investigator trying to get pictures of us.”

“What – Who would hire a P.I. to do that?”

“Pastor Jorge did so. At Bridget's request. After Mass, he pulled me aside to show them to me and apologize for what he'd done. What a fucking joke.”

Joel sighs on the other end of the call. “Where are you right now?”

“I'm down by that hiking trail I told you about. I'm so mad, I just need to walk it off…” You stop and look around, suddenly not recognizing where you are. “Shit.”

“Shit?”

“I might’ve taken the wrong path.” You start retracing your steps, going back the way you came.

“Space Boy, one of these days you're gonna give me a heart attack. Do you think you'll be able to find your way back?”

“Yeah, there's usually an intersection with three different paths, I guess I went the wrong way.…” As you say this, you come to an intersection, the familiar path making you feel relieved.

“Hello? You still there?”

“Yep! Sorry, Joel. I found the right way, I’ll be heading back home.”

“Thank fuck. Stay safe out there. And come straight to my place, please. Tonight, Rosa and you are staying over.”

“But –”

“No buts or ifs.”

You sigh and smile to yourself. “Fine.”

“See you soon.”

“See you soon…” You reply before hanging up.

The day has finally come. You're a free man, and you get to keep custody of Rosa. Bridget's kidnapping only helped you in the divorce, since she'd gone against the previously agreed upon custody plans and put your child in active danger by fleeing the police at high speed. You also get to keep the house and your car. Not that you'd grown to dislike your dream house, but being able to see Rosa was your top priority in this case.

There were also rumors that Pastor Jorge was transferring to another church, which made you laugh when you first heard about it.

With what little energy you have left, you make your way to the Millers' house, where Rosa has been staying during the finalization of the divorce. You tug lightly on your tie to loosen it around your neck as you ring the doorbell. You roll your shoulder a bit as you massage it with your free hand.

The door swings open and Rosa jumps at you, hugging you tightly.

“Dad!” She smiles happily as she looks at your face.

Even though you're completely drained, you manage to smile back at her in a more sincere way than you originally thought possible. Joel and Sarah stand behind Rosa in the doorway, curious about how it all ended.

“Hey guys. Good news, it's finally done and Rosa is staying with me.”

You notice a hint of excitement in Joel's expression that makes your stomach flutter. This feeling has become unbearable for you, the exhaustion in your bones only adding to it.

“This is great! We should celebrate together tonight.” Joel suggests.

Rosa finally lets go of you and walks back inside, waiting for you to follow her. You snicker and walk in after her with slow, heavy steps.

“Sure, but let's not overdo it, I'm really exhausted from everything.” You remove your suit jacket and hang it up. Sarah and Rosa sit on the leather couch in the living room and chat excitedly.

Joel gestures with his head to follow him into the kitchen as he speaks, “Of course, Space Boy. What would you like for supper, though? Takeout? My homemade chicken fajitas?”

“Uh, the fajitas. They’re my favorite.” You lean against the kitchen counter after following him into the room. He stares out the window as he stands by the fridge, his hand resting on the handle. You watch him, wondering what he's thinking about. There are steps heading upstairs, Rosa and Sarah must have gone up to Sarah's room.

In a quiet tone, he begins asking you, “Space Boy, do you think… we could work out together?” He walks toward you, his expression pained.

Your gaze remains fixed on his eyes. He places his hands on the kitchen counter behind you, one on each side, to get as close to you as possible.

“I… I think it could. But –” Your heart aches, but it starts to beat like crazy in your chest. You can feel his breath brushing against your skin, and you feel the blood rushing to your face.

Being in Joel's presence is intoxicating. You want to spend more time with him, kiss him and more, but inside you're still in pain from Bridget. His thumb softly brushes against your hand, as if to ask permission to kiss you, his other hand reaches for your tie and gently pulls at it.

“But I need more time, Joel.” A shudder runs through your body as you look at him with lidded eyes. He steps back with his hands in the air, his face not as close to yours as before.

“Oh. I’m sorry, I thought… since you’re finally divorced…”

“No, please don’t take this the wrong way. I'd love to. But I’m… I’m so done.” Your shoulders slump as you spit out these words, “I need some time to heal.”

He remains silent for a second, caressing your cheek before sighing, “Ok. I'll wait.”

“Thank you…” You frown and rub the left side of your chest, it starts to feel tighter, “I... I'm sorry, I think I need some time to calm down... I don't feel too well all of a sudden.”

“Here, sit down.” Joel pulls out a chair and helps you sit down, grabs a glass and pours you a fresh cup of water. You take a few deep breaths, your head spinning at the slightest movement, but as soon as you drink some water and focus more on your breathing, it calms down.

“Yeah, I won't be staying too long tonight.” You chuckle, feeling every fiber of your being screaming for some rest.

“I get it. You looked like you were just dragging yourself around the last few weeks.” He starts to prepare the food so you won't have to wait too long, marinating the chicken while he chops the different colored peppers, onions, garlic, and the rest of the vegetables for the fajitas.

“I’ll get out of your way.” When you're able to stand, you get up and lie down on the couch. Your body feels heavy when you do, an involuntary nap forcing itself upon you.

You wake up to the girls coming down the stairs. A wonderful smell of freshly cooked food fills the air.

“Space Boy, food’s ready.” Joel comes out of the kitchen, a towel slung over his shoulder as he clicks the tongs in his hand.

The food is absolutely delicious, and thankfully the nap gave you enough energy to walk home afterward.

The date is October 6th, 2005.

It's been a year and a half since you finally became single. Rosa and Sarah turned 16 this year, and you, like Joel, are dreading the big 4 approaching in two years.

“We're gonna be late for the concert if you don't hurry!” She stands by the door with her arms crossed.

“I’ll be right there! You can get the car started, I'll be right there!” You quickly throw on a denim jacket that was gathering dust in the back of your closet. Rosa had surprised you with some Santana tickets for his Embrace Your Light Tour and an overnight stay in a hotel near the arena, which she made you book and pay for yourself. It's an hour and a half drive to the SBC Center in San Antonio. Since Rosa wanted to be the driver with her freshly obtained license, you would have to leave sooner than if you were behind the steering wheel.

The revving of the car's engine cuts through the chirping of birds. Rosa gestures that you'll be late again by pointing at her wrist. You get into the passenger seat and fasten your seatbelt.

“Did you bring the tickets?” You ask as she starts to back out of the driveway. The car stops abruptly.

“Shit, I didn’t!”

You get out of the car and run back inside, grabbing both tickets from the coffee table and making it back to the car in record time.

“Let's go, come on.” You place the tickets on the dashboards before quickly buckling your seat belt.

“Ok, ok. Eh, nobody’s behind me, I can go. I think.” She frantically looks between the rearview and side mirrors to make sure there's no one behind her, and starts driving when she's sure she can get out.

You help her with the directions, and soon she parks the car, albeit a little crookedly, in the parking lot of the arena. You take the tickets and put them in your pocket. Rosa gets out of the car and walks with you slowly towards the building, checking her phone once.

There are a lot of people around, heads bobbing up and down as they walk in the same direction. You feel a tug on your sleeve.

“Dad, I saw Joel and Sarah over there.” Rosa points in a general direction of the crowd, holding onto your arm to prevent being separated from you.

“What? Oh my God, I didn't know they were coming! Joel!” You yell, smiling as you spot him. Throwing your hand in the air, you wave it from side to side, trying to get his attention.

His head turns in your direction, and when he notices you after scanning the crowd, his face lights up. A big smile is plastered on your face as you slowly make your way to you, walking around groups of people who are blocking everyone's way.

“And you still expect me to believe that you don’t have feelings for him?” Rosa remarks sarcastically before they finally reach you. You look at her with a bored expression, noticing her mischievous look.

“Star, I’ve told you countless times already… — Hi! Joel, Sarah! What a coincidence to run into you two!”

“This is no coincidence at all! We planned this, hehe!” Sarah grins before giving Rosa a big hug.

“You little shits.” Joel puts both hands on his hips in disbelief before reaching out to shake your hand.

“Well, this is actually a pleasant surprise. I talked to Rosa about inviting you both, since I'm pretty sure you like Santana, but she convinced me not to. Makes sense why now.” You smile at Joel, both girls now walking ahead of you to the line of people waiting to get in.

He stands next to you, looking around excitedly. You can read his emotions pretty well by now, and whenever he gets this excited, his eyes get a gleam in them.

“I do have to admit, I think I'm going to enjoy this a lot.” He mumbles, his lips forming a small smile.

“Maybe it’ll motivate you enough to finally pick up that guitar that’s been gathering dust in your living room.” You scoff and nudge him with your elbow.

“As if! I practice regularly.” He crosses his arms defensively. “Are you sure? I’ve never seen you play before.”

“Well, that’s because I don’t like playin’ in front of other people.”

“I’d still love to hear you play something on it once, though.”

He frowns and thinks before nodding.

“Aight. Next time you’re over, I’m playing and singing you a song.”

“Oh, how nice. My own private concert.” You laugh.

Your group makes it through the front doors after showing your tickets to the guards at the ticket booths, and you make your way into the crowd of people standing around waiting for the show to begin.

When it does, you stare up at the stage in awe as you watch Santana skillfully strumming his guitar. That is, until the girls have to take a bathroom break.

“I told you to go to the bathroom before we left.” You hold on to Rosa's arm as she holds Sarah's hand, Joel right behind you as you walk to the back of the crowd, the bathroom signs glowing above the doors.

Rosa and Sarah go to the restroom, leaving you and Joel alone, waiting at the back of the arena, close to the door. A particular part of the song Santana is playing has the crowd screaming with excitement.

While his eyes remain focused on the stage, Joel's eyes light up. Your hand fidgets with the button of your sleeve. The denim behind it feels a little cold against your fingertips, your attention on him instead of the show. The soft light from the front highlights his features. His beautiful eyes and his enthralled expression.

The concert is fun and all that, but for you, the highlight is seeing him. It's like he's looking at his lifelong dream, and you get to witness that moment all to yourself. As the music slows down and the two of you are in a more private place, you feel the urge to kiss him.

The moment just feels right.

You pull Joel's arm, drawing his attention away from the stage, and kiss him as the lights dim around you. His lips are hot and soft against yours. You wrap your arms around him, and his arms wrap around your waist.

When he pulls away from the kiss, your gazes meet. You stare into each other's eyes for a moment that feels like it could last a lifetime. The beating of your heart is louder than the drums in the song.

“Joel. I love you.” You gently smile. “I – I love you, too, Space Boy.” His arms wrap tighter around you, and he kisses you again. The moment feels intimate, even though there is a crowd of people around. Their focus is on the performance and the music, not on you.

Rosa and Sarah shriek as they return from their adventure to the bathrooms and see this public display of affection, “Oh my God! Finally!”

You pull away and hide your blushing face behind your hand, Joel scratches the back of his head while his other hand holds onto the fabric covering your arm. Rosa and Sarah don't waste any time and pull you and Joel into a big group hug.

“We’ve been waiting for sooooo long.” Sarah rolls her eyes dramatically before lightly punching Joel's arm.

Joel reaches for your hand, holding it tightly as you make your way back into the crowd, your other hand holding Rosa’s.

The concert is over pretty late, but you are still full of energy as you drive to the Fairmount Hotel, where you have a room reservation. Rosa falls asleep in the passenger seat within seconds, giving you 15 minutes to think about what happened during the concert.

A warm and comforting feeling spreads through your stomach. You've finally told him how you feel after making him wait for two years.

“I’ll be damned.” You say as you drive up to the hotel and notice Joel's car parked right next to yours. They arrived almost at the same time as you, probably having taken a different road. “Rosa, wake up. We’re here.”

You get out of the car as Joel and Sarah lock theirs.

“Was this part of your plan, too?” You ask.

“Actually, this is pure coincidence.” Sarah answers sleepily.

Rosa finally gets out of the car and notices the pair standing next to you.

“This is so cool! Can we sleep in the same room?!” She asks with the biggest puppy eyes.

“Nope. Out of the question. You both are still underage, and you’ve been kidnapped in the past, young lady.” Your answer shoots out like a bullet from a revolver.

“Aw… what a shame.”

Joel laughs before walking to the hotel's front desk. You check in and head for the stairs. Joel and Sarah's room is on the third floor, yours and Rosa's on the second. Tired and a little deaf from the loud music of the concert, the four of you walk up the stairs, stopping on the second floor to wish each other good night.

The beds in your room are comfortable. Rosa falls asleep immediately, her face buried in the blanket that covers her. You stare at the ceiling, your arms behind your head. Sleep is actively avoiding you as you think about Joel. You have to talk to him, ask him if he'd like to go out with you.

An hour passes, and you finally gain enough confidence to knock on his door. With soft, silent steps, you leave the hotel room, taking the key with you and locking the door behind you so no one can get in.

“Space Boy?” Joel’s hushed voice greets you as you’re halfway up the stairs to the third floor.

“Joel?” You look up and see him standing a few steps ahead of you.

“Did we have the same idea?” He laughs quietly, scratching the back of his head nervously.

“It depends. Were you also going to ask me out?” You chuckle.

“I sure was.” He holds on to the handrail on the side, shifting his weight from one leg to the other.

“Well, I guess that’s a yes from the both of us, then.” Relieved, you cross your arms, the air in the staircase colder than in the rooms.

“It is.”

You look around before taking the last few steps to stand at the same height.

“Talk tomorrow?” He asks before holding your hand.

“Talk tomorrow.” You smile and plant a kiss on his cheek.

“We’re going on a date this Saturday. I know a place outside of town that's wonderful for stargazing. Clear your schedule. Sarah and Rosa are staying with friends anyway.” He'd told you in secret the next morning before you left the hotel. The girls slept quite late, so you had time to talk to him briefly in the staircase.

You agreed in a heartbeat, finally allowing yourself to see him as more than just a friend. It made you really excited.

And today was finally the day.

“Star, you know Joel and I are going out tonight, but don't hesitate to call me if anything happens, or you need any help.” You walk up and down the house as you get ready, stopping at a mirror to check if you still look good or if you have just been cursed to be the ugliest creature in the world. Each time you check, you adjust your hair.

“Yes, Dad. I know. You need to learn how to relax, jeez. Also, you look fine.” Her head pokes through your bedroom door as she rolls her eyes.

“I'll relax when I know you're safe.” You adjust your shirt and follow her downstairs.

“And I will be.” She kisses your cheek as she slips into her jacket.

”You better. I don't want to see another scratch on my car, either.” You warn her jokingly.

“Aw, there goes my plan to drive into every mailbox I come across.” She blinks a few times as she pouts and starts putting on her shoes.

“Damaging other people's cars is more fun anyway. Do what I did when I was younger, kick off some side mirrors.”

She gasps dramatically, “Father!? I didn't know you were such a rule breaker.”

You laugh and pat her head.

“Love you, Dad. You two have fun tonight!” She hugs you tightly.

“I love you too, Star. And you, too. See you tomorrow.”

Rosa leaves the house around 5 in the afternoon. You sit on the couch, anxiously looking out the window, waiting for Joel. He picks you up in his pickup truck half an hour later.

“Hi, Space Boy. You ready?” He smiles at you as you get in and close the passenger door.

”I sure am! I’m excited to see the stars tonight, the forecast said we’d have clear skies.” You fasten your seatbelt.

“Well, I have a few other things planned besides stargazing, but I can't tell you any more than that.” He grins as he starts driving down the road.

He drives on some ranch roads and goes off-road at the end of the trip. Parking in the middle of an empty field, he quickly gets out.

“I’ll be right back, I need to set up the last few preparations.”

“Ok.” You stay in the car and watch him walk away.

“No peeking!” He yells when he notices your head turning to look at what he's doing outside.

“Fine!” You chuckle as you look up at the sky through the windshield. The sun has almost completely set, the horizon painted a warm orange that turns dark blue the higher you look.

Five minutes later, Joel knocks on your window before opening the passenger side door. You get out of the car and look around. He's set up a tent, filled with blankets and pillows, a backpack tucked inside one of the pockets.

“That's for later,” he says as he gently pushes you in front of him and leads you to the back of his pickup, “you're going to have to climb into the back of the truck.”

“I didn't know we were camping, I didn't bring anything!”

“Don't worry, I thought of everything.”

You frown before climbing into the back of the truck. A blanket is spread out on the back, held in place by a couple of six-packs of beer. Two pillows are placed against the rear panel.

“Come on. Lie down, I’ll grab us two beers already.”

You pick up the pillow and move it down a bit to get a good view of the sky. The first stars are already appearing. Joel lies down beside you after handing you an open can of beer.

“We’re a bit early, but this way we can see them appear one after another.” He notes before taking a sip of beer.

“I can already see the big dipper over there, actually.” You point to the seven brighter starts, tracing the general shape.

“Shit, I didn’t know you knew constellations.”

“Haha, I don’t. That's actually the only one I can point out. It's pretty easy to pinpoint out of all of them.”

“Huh. I should’ve gotten a map or somethin’ so we could look for them together.”

“I actually don’t think we need one. We can make up our own.” You drink some beer, holding your head up a bit so you don't spill it on yourself.

“That actually sounds like fun.” He looks around for a moment, thinking. You watch him for a bit before looking up to the sky yourself.

“I got something. You see that cluster of stars over there?” He points somewhere, and you move closer to his head to see where he's pointing.

“Yeah, I do.”

“If you connect them like this…” He traces an oval shape and a longer line that ends in a few dividing lines. “It’s a guitar!”

“Oh, I see it! That’s a nice one, let me try.” You look around, trying to find something good.

“Alright, this one is a bit stupid, if you connect those over there, it sorta looks like a turd. I’d like to name it Pastor Jorge.”

“Pff – You did not just call him a piece of shit.” He lets out a full belly laugh before sighing.

“I did.” You smile and look up at the sky. By now, the sky is completely dark, the lack of light around you allowing you to see every little glowing speck. You take a deep breath, smell the fresh air, and allow yourself to think of nothing.

“I think I found the guitar pick over there. That or it's the Illuminati.” He jokes, pointing to a cluster of stars forming a rounded triangle.

“I sense you’ve got a theme going. Hm… Oh! I found a little heart.”

You both fall silent for a while, just drinking a few cans of beer and enjoying each other's presence. And so hours go by, the air slowly getting colder.

“Joel, thank you for this. The view is beautiful…” You break the silence as you watch the stars flicker in the darkness of space.

“It is.” Joel whispers.

When you turn your head to look at him, you realize that he's been staring at you the whole time.

“That was the corniest thing you've ever said to me. Ever.” You roll your eyes jokingly, but can't keep a creeping smile off your face.

He pushes himself up on his elbow, his hand caressing your cheek before leaning down and kissing you gently. You hum and close your eyes, reciprocating the kiss. It all feels so magical.

You roll towards him, your hand resting on his chest, and he pulls you closer to his body. Even though it's a bit cold, his body and his kiss warm your entire body, making you shiver with excitement as he deepens the kiss.

You find yourself pressing your body into his, seeking his touch and warmth. Your heart could jump out of your chest from the speed at which it is beating. The blood rushes to your face and slowly to a different part of your body.

“Fuck, I’d almost forgotten how great this feels…” You suck on his lower lip as a low groan rolls up your throat, pulling him closer as you wrap your arms around him. His hands explore your body over your clothes, your erection growing slowly.

“Let’s get into the tent, it’s getting a bit chilly out here.” He pants as he whispers close to your mouth after pulling away. You could feel how hard he was against your thigh, your need to finally get him out of his clothes taking over.

“Yeah, you’re right.” You push yourself up and climb out of the truck bed, making sure not to lose your footing. Joel follows you, grabbing your hand before leading you into the tent. Before letting go of your hand, he reaches into the tent and flips a switch that turns on some string lights that are wrapped around the poles that hold up the canvas of the tent.

There is something magical about these lights as you slowly climb into your temporary shelter for the night. You had taken off your shoes before entering, so as not to get any dirt on the blankets. The floor is soft, thanks to a thin but comfortable mattress underneath, and the tent itself is quite spacious.

You sit off to the side, hugging your knees to make room for Joel to sit inside as well. He zips up the flap of the tent.

“This is so cute, the lights look like stars you can touch.” You reach for one, feeling the cold, smooth glass against your fingertip.

“I’m glad you like it and that you didn’t peek into the back before we drove off.” His face has a softness to it, the dim light illuminating your favorite features. “The tent was half set up already, just so you wouldn’t have to wait too long.”

You shuffle to sit more comfortably. “I didn’t take you for such a romantic.”

A look of embarrassment washes over his face for a second before turning into an enamored one. “We never went on a proper date before, so…”

“Yeah, my bad. We’ll need to make up for the lost time, then.” You shuffle closer to him, resting your hand on his, before you whisper, “We can start by finishing what we started in the truck.”

His body shivers visibly. It makes you chuckle, and when you look into his eyes, his pupils are like a dark abyss you'd jump into without a second thought.

Without saying anything, he kisses you in the most tender and heartfelt way you've ever been kissed, his hand gripping your upper arm. He pushes you to lie down, making sure your head doesn't hit the floor too hard. Your hands hold on to him, pulling his weight to feel his body against yours.

The air in the tent quickly warms as he plants open-mouthed kisses on your neck, leaving you panting beneath him. Your pants tighten as your hands squeeze his ass, his cheeks soft and squishy as you knead them. A subtle motion of his hips as he pushes himself up on his elbows to look at you feels electrifying, causing him to start grinding against you, heavy pants falling from his lips.

Your fingers slowly undo the buttons on his shirt as you become harder from the friction of his jeans against yours. His breath mixes with yours before kissing you with tongue, the muscle tracing the edge of your front teeth for a second. Everything is back the way it's supposed to be. His touches and taste are intoxicating, making your head spin.

He begins undressing you, and soon you're both naked, your clothes clumped together in the corner of the tent. Joel sits up and pulls you up to sit between his legs, your back resting against his chest as his arms wrap around you to grab your erection, stroking it lazily with a loose grip. You feel his hard, twitching boner pressing against your lower back, making your stomach flutter with excitement.

Breathy moans escape your lips as you watch his hand rub you, he kisses the back of your neck. You grab his legs to ground yourself, resisting the urge to thrust into his fist.

“Did you ever jerk off thinking about me when we were just friends?” He whispers shamelessly, his hand tightening around the base of your cock.

“N – No. I haven’t jerked off since we – hah – got caught by Bridget, to be honest.” You gasp as he moves his hand up your shaft in a drawn out, aching motion.

“Then it’s about time. I could see how stressed you’ve been the past year, let me help you relax…” He softly blows some air behind your ear, making you shiver.

“Fuck – But if you get me off right away, you’ll need to wait for me to recover…”

“Hm, you’re right. I can still get you ready, though.” He reaches for his backpack and takes out a bottle of lube. With a touch of urgency, he asks, “Could you sit sideways on my lap, please?”

You nod and sit on his lap with your legs angled, and one of your arms resting on his shoulder.

“Tilt your hips a bit… like that.” He kisses your cheek before smearing some lube on his fingers, his hand slipping between your legs. His other hand is on your back to support you. The lube feels cold and wet as his fingers prod against your anus, one slowly pushing in, the feel of his calloused finger entering you strange yet familiar. A heat begins to build in your lower abdomen.

As you relax, you close your eyes and concentrate on how he is making you feel. He stretches you out, slowly working his way up to three fingers, occasionally curling them to brush against your prostate. The whole thing somehow overstimulates you after such a long time without pleasuring yourself.

“Joel… Please, that’s – ahn – enough… I need you.” You whine as your cock begs to be touched, pre-cum leaking from the tip and running down your shaft.

A guttural growl leaves his lips before he pulls his fingers out of you and lays you on the floor. Kneeling between your legs, he pours some lube on his own neglected hard-on and spreads it all over it with his hand, stroking it a few more times with his eyes closed. He pushes a pillow under your hips, his legs bent underneath yours. He kisses your temple as he slowly penetrates you, the head of his cock slowly spreading your hole apart.

The sensation sends your body into overdrive, your cock throbbing in anticipation. Since it's been a while, he stops when he's completely inside you, letting you get used to the feeling, but also using it as an opportunity to enjoy the feeling of you around him. You groan, hiding your face behind your hands as you feel it burning like a thousand suns. The heat your body is producing is driving you crazy.

“Have you gotten shy since the last time we – hah – did this...?” He teases you, his voice hushed but full of need.

There's no way you can answer this question, your body feels like it's on fire with lust. He chuckles at your breathy, moaning silence and slowly begins to move, his breathing getting heavier as he goes. You quickly become a mess as he finds the right angle to press against your prostate, sending waves of ecstasy to your brain every time it happens. You don't know what to do with yourself or where to put your arms, your hands automatically grab the sheets you're lying on.

“Hah… You feel so good…” He groans as he thrusts deeper into you, his eyes lidded as he watches your face closely. His hands grab your hips for a better hold, since you've started to slip away from him a bit. You let go of the sheets and hold onto his upper arms, feeling his muscles under your fingertips.

“Too much – ah – slow down a little, please.” Eyes squeezed shut, you whine and bite your lower lip as your fingernails dig into the skin of his arms, leaving crescent-shaped marks. Your legs wrap tightly around his hips, slowing his thrusts but keeping him deep inside you.

“Sorry, I just got so excited to finally have you all to myself again…” He whispers, resting his forehead on yours. You finally notice how fast his heart is beating when you gently press your hand to his chest. You open your eyes to look into his, your own heart pounding in your ears.

“Fuck – I love you so much, Joel.” Cupping his cheeks, you pull him closer to shower his lips with kisses and loosen your legs to allow him to thrust faster again. He does so happily after hearing your confession of love once more, those words as sweet as honey to his ears.

His hands leave your sides, and he props himself up on his elbows to get into a more comfortable position. He slides his forearms over your shoulders, sliding them under your head, giving it more support.

He groans against your lips, the sound of skin against skin increasing in volume as his thrusts turn into pounding, forcing you to try to muffle your moans as your head gets lighter, your orgasm creeping closer. The air inside the tent is now hot and humid from your sweaty bodies. The fabric walls around you rustle with each quick thrust.

Joel notices your feeble attempt at remaining silent. Your moans are not stifled at all, they just get stuck in your throat, so he decides to thrust deeper into you, breaking your focus and leaving you gasping and moaning his name for the whole world to hear.

Your fingers dig into his back, leaving scratches that are going to leave marks all over him. You feel like you're losing your mind, your thoughts a jumbled mess of emotions.

“I’m so fuckin’ close, Space Boy.” He moans next to your ear as his breath hitches.

You don't get a chance to answer as he wraps his hand around your cock and strokes it, one, two, three times, before your orgasm washes over you. You paint your belly with your own release. Your legs tighten around his hips again as they shake a little.

His brow furrows as he's about to reach his own orgasm, a moan catching in his throat as he thrusts erratically into you. Soon after, he reaches his release deep inside you.

“You’re all mine… finally, all mine.” He sighs, his movements slowing as he rides out his high.

“I am…” You slowly catch your breath, caressing his back before smiling as you gently cradle his cheek, your body tired and drained. You press a tender kiss to his lips, finally relaxed, finally free.

That night, spooning Joel as you drift off to sleep, you sleep better than you originally anticipated.

And so another year goes by, and it's the year 2006.

Joel and you enjoy going on secret dates together, but you always make sure to be there for your daughters when they need you the most, which they often do. They're applying to colleges all over the country and working on the side to save some money for a place together.

One day, when the girls are on a much-needed break before a trip to the northern states to do some college tours, Rosa is in her bedroom. You are preparing a snack for her when you get a call from Bridget's parents. You hadn't heard from them since their daughter was thrown in jail. But you held no grudge against them, they never treated you any differently.

Bridget had not contacted you at all for a year and a half. Not that you needed her to, but you were curious how she and the baby were doing. She hadn't even told you its gender or what it was called, and Rosa had asked about it several times, always sad when she heard the same answer.

“Edith, hello! It’s been so long.” You answer, holding the phone between your ear and your shoulder.

“Hello, dear. It has. I'm so sorry we haven't talked in so long.” Her voice sounds pleased to be talking to you again, but there's a subtle worry in it.

“Oh, don't worry about it. It's nice to hear your voice again after so long. How have the two of you been doing?”

“We've been doing just fine. Say, do you have a minute? We need to talk about something important.”

“Of course. What is it?”

“Dear, I know this is no subject to discuss over the phone, but Bridget has requested that we talk to you about something.”

“Oh? I thought she never wanted to talk to me, ever again.”

“Yes, but you see, she's had a change of heart after seeing how what she'd done to Rosa affected her… And now she's asked if you would consider adopting Cooper. He can't stay with her in prison much longer, and she thinks you'd be a better parent than she could ever be. And John and I are getting too old to take care of such a young child…”

Your stomach sinks as you hear this, but then you remember how important this information is to Rosa. “… Just a second, I heard what you said, and I'll come back to it, but I think Rosa would like to know about her baby brother.”

“Of course. I’ll wait.”

You walk over to Rosa's bedroom, a little stunned, and knock on the door, opening it only when she tells you to come in. She's lying on her stomach in bed, playing something on her Nintendo DS that she'd been saving up for.

“Star, I just wanted to tell you, that you have a baby brother.” You hold your hand over the microphone on your phone, while holding it further away from your head.

Her eyes light up with excitement and she sits up in bed to face you. “Thank you! I've been waiting for this information for almost two years! What's his name?”

“Cooper.”

“Cooper. I like that name. Is that Mom on the phone?”

“Nope, it's your grandparents. But I still need to talk to them about some things. You can call them later.”

“Alright. Say hi to Gran and Gramps for me.”

“I will.” You step out of her room and walk into yours, closing the door behind you.

“Hello, Edith? Are you still there?”

“Yes, dear. So, what are your thoughts?”

“I… need some time to think about it… Is it alright if I call you back in a day or two?”

“Of course, dear. I understand.”

“Thank you. I'll give you a call when I've made up my mind. Oh, and Rosa says hello.”

“Alright, talk then! Bye and say hi to Rosa for us, sweetheart.”

“I will, bye,” you smile and hang up. Later, Rosa calls her grandparents and tells them about the trip she's going on starting tomorrow. You sit anxiously in the living room for the rest of the day, trying to figure out what to do.

The thought of adopting Bridget and Pastor Jorge's son doesn't leave your mind, even when you're having your date night with Joel the following night. You managed to have the weekend to yourselves again, since Rosa and Sarah had left to do several campus tours in the upper states together and Tommy had been busy with his own life.

This time it was your turn to prepare for the date night at your place and you've managed to cook a delicious meal together. The candlelit dinner gets Joel in the mood to finish with you for dessert as you load the dirty dishes into the dishwasher. He'd somehow managed to get you on the kitchen counter, your back pressed against the hard marble. Your legs are wrapped loosely around his hips. He notices your wandering mind when you are in the middle of making out. There are no whiny pleas coming out of your mouth, no hot remarks, your touches aren't as needy, and your eyebrows are more furrowed than usual.

“Space Boy, is everything ok?” His voice interrupts your train of thought. You let out a frustrated breath before grabbing Joel's shirt and pulling him closer as you kiss his lips again. Your body is still visibly reacting to the attention you were receiving, your cock achingly hard against the seam of your pants.

“Everythin’s fine… fuck.” You slur your words as you whisper against his lips, his hand firmly squeezing your thigh close to your crotch, pressing your leg down against the hard surface you're lying on.

“You sure…? I can tell there's something on your mind.” Joel hesitates and seems a little concerned.

A groan of discomfort passes your lips before you finally give up and let go of him, your hands rubbing your face as you roll your hip up to grind against him one more time.

“I didn't want to bring this up tonight, but if I don't, it's just going to eat me up from the inside.”

Joel raises an eyebrow as he looks down at you and stands up straight, helping you to sit upright on the counter. His hands rest on your thighs, caressing them gently as you speak.

“Bridget's parents called me to ask if I would consider adopting and raising the kid, and I don't know what to do.”

“… What was your initial answer going to be?”

“Well, fuck no, of course. But then I got to thinking. Rosa’s gonna be out of the house in no time, and I did want to have another kid before all this happened…”

Joel snorts at the last thing you just said, making you realize what he just thought about. He likes to bring up the fact that you, an almost forty-year-old man, had begged him on several occasions to get you pregnant in your fucked out condition.

“… Don’t bring that up again, I’m still embarrassed about it.” You hide your face in your hands and bump your head against his chest, groaning in agony at the utter humiliation.

“I won’t, I won’t.” He laughs before patting your shoulder. “As long as you don't resent the kid, why don't you just go for it?”

“You’re right… He’s still Rosa’s brother, after all. Thank you, Joel. I think I’ve made up my mind.” You sigh, smile and kiss him on the cheek.

“Would you like to make a quick phone call, then?”

“No, I can do that tomorrow. I have something else on my mind right now.” You slide your hand to his hip, slipping your thumb under his shirt to press against his skin.

“Hah, right, dessert.” He lets out a small chuckle before following your body down onto the counter, his tongue licking up your neck as he leaves open-mouthed kisses all over it, marking some less obvious spots.

You have plenty of time to let the hickeys heal up before the girls come back, and you couldn't care less if people bring it up. You've been divorced for a while now, you could lie about seeing a new mystery woman.

The feel of his hot breath against your skin, his clothed erection pressing against yours, makes your mind go blank. His hands slide under your shirt, caressing your most sensitive areas. Your pants feel so painfully tight that it makes you whimper.

“Let me help you with that…” He says close to your ear before unbuckling your belt.

“Hah… Are you sure you want to do this here?” You breathe as he continues to unbuckle your pants, the metal parts of your belt rattling against the marble countertop. You sigh in relief as your cock feels less restricted.

“I’m certain I want to do this here. Can't you feel it? The counter is at the perfect height.” He smirks as he grabs your hips and thrusts against you, sending an overwhelming sensation of pleasure through your entire body.

“Oh fuck.” You gasp, the wet patch on the front of your underwear growing larger.

He chuckles at your reaction before his face drops when he realizes something and hits his forehead with the bottom of his palm.

“I didn’t fully think this through… We don’t have any lube here, and we’re already like this…” He groans in frustration, slapping his hands down on the counter as he pushes himself up, mentally preparing himself to make his way upstairs to retrieve the bottle of lube from your bedroom.

With whatever brain activity is left in your horny head, you think for a second before blurting out, “Coconut oil! There's coconut oil on the shelf back there that I never use.”

Joel does a double take before looking in the direction you're pointing.

“Here?” He takes a few steps to the side and holds his hand up to one of the shelves.

“Yep.” You push yourself up on your elbows, watching him with a flushed expression.

He turns and looks for it, pushing a few things around before grabbing the jar. “Found it.”

“Finally… come back over here, I’m growing impatient.” You groan.

Joel grins and sets the jar down on the counter beside you. “I guess dessert will be coconut flavored, tonight.”

You roll your eyes before lying back down. Joel grabs the waistband of your pants and underwear, pulling them off and tossing them to the floor. He whistles at the sight of you, the tip of your cock dripping with pre-cum as it twitches.

He opens the jar of coconut oil and frowns.

“Should I just…” He gestures with his hand holding the lid as if dipping his fingers into the solid mass before continuing with the question, “… dip my fingers in there?”

“Yeah, we can put that jar aside so I don’t use it for cooking…” You watch as he takes some oil on his fingers and melts the white substance between them.

He sets the jar and lid down next to you and uses his fingers to stretch you out as he usually does, starting with one finger at a time. You rest your legs on his shoulders as you arch your back in pleasure. The hand on your leg, holding it in place, squeezes it tightly. His fingers curl in just the right way so that you're about to come untouched. In a panicked state, not wanting to do so yet, you moan out loudly, “Wait, please stop – mh!”

He hums as he pulls his fingers out, watching your legs tremble and your body and dick twitch, enjoying seeing you in this state. That was close. You breathe heavily, your eyes wide open and your mouth agape.

“You ok?” He asks, leaning down to kiss your cheek.

“Hah… ah… Yes, sorry… I was just about to come…” You gulp as you try to catch your breath.

“Oh.” He chuckles and unbuckles his pants, not even bothering to undress himself at this point. He scoops some more coconut oil into this hand, which immediately begins to melt in his hot palm, and spreads it over his erection, making sure to cover its entire length. “Let me know when you’re ready.”

The world finally stops spinning around you, so you nod. “I think I should be fine, now.”

“Good… I’m so fucking hard right now, that it hurts…” He exhales and positions himself to push the tip inside your hole, the sensation a little different with the chosen lubricant. It doesn't feel as wet as usual, it actually feels silky and somehow like there's no barrier between the two of you, which makes you nervous that you might like it a bit too much.

He pushes all the way in, but doesn't stop like he usually does, just moving in and out of you slowly. "Fuck... that feels amazing."

A gasp gets stuck in your throat, Joel grabs hold of your hips and you lock your legs loosely around his. It feels so intense that your eyes roll to the back of your head.

“Space Boy, is it ok if I start going faster, already?” He asks in a hushed voice.

“For the love of God, yes! Please!” You close your eyes, humming and moaning.

“Jesus – Fuck.” He buries his face into your shoulder, picking up speed as his thrusts get deeper and harder. With each blow to your prostate, a hot knot forms in your lower abdomen, and the pleasure reaches your head in waves, leaving your head empty. At this moment, you and Joel are the only two people in the world. You exist only for each other, like a matching set of salt and pepper shakers made to fit together.

His grip on your hips gets stronger, so strong that it starts to hurt a little, but at this point it's a pain that feels good. He moans between heavy breaths, beads of sweat forming on his forehead as he thrusts into you with determination. His head hangs low as his eyes squeeze shut.

“Space Boy… I’m so fuckin’ close, baby…”

And so are you, this whole experience is something new to you, you never thought the both of you could feel this good just by changing what you use as lube. You arch your back, holding Joel's hands that don't let go of you, the spot on your hips slowly bruising. Your head clears completely, a hazy feeling taking over after your orgasm washes over you.

Your shirt is covered with your own cum and you feel Joel's entire weight resting on top of you, his chest heaving as he comes down from his high as well. It's only now that you realize he's come at the same time as you, his ejaculation adding a hot, wet sensation as he moves slowly inside you.

Breathing heavily, your hearts still beating fast in your chests, you are both a mess. You keep your legs wrapped around his hips, enjoying the closeness and the feeling of him still inside you.

And so the night passes with much experimentation with this newfound passion between the both of you. The next day you're barely able to walk, so you stay in bed with Joel, listening to his heartbeat and cuddling with him.

“Joel, could you pass me my phone, I still need to call Edith…” You remember what still needs to be done.

“Sure, here you go.” He reaches over for your phone and hands it to you. You adjust the pillow behind you and sit up as best you can to make the call.

You dial the number and put the phone to your ear and listen. The dial tone beeps a few times before Edith's voice comes through the speaker.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Edith. It's me. I've been thinking a lot about what you asked me, and I've made up my mind.”

[TO PEDRO PASCAL CHARACTERS X READER MASTERLIST]

#space boy gets me every time #also fuck pastor jorge for sending me through so many different emotions with that PI #and the smut and the fluff !!! omg #so cute #i wanna go camping with joel #🥺🥺🥺#pedro pascal x male reader #joel miller x male reader #joel miller #reblog

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