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Stage 4 lockdown

It has now been two months since I’ve started working. It has been quite a wild ride to say the least. Had the first two day of training and then the next few weeks have been working from home. It has definitely been challenging and i wasnt expecting it to be this way. A lot has definitely happened in the last two months but not as much as it was in the beginning of the year. We are currently half way through the stage 4 lockdowns... yup.. Melbourne reached stage 4 lockdowns because there were a few idiots who couldn't keep it in there pants at the quarantined hotel.

I think with the additional mask wearing and people not being able to see anyone, it definitely has been hard not being able to see anyone but honestly i’m kind of loving the working from home aspect but i have to say that the training could be done differently. I’m all for learning on my own and doing everything myself but it comes to a point where you need to actually be taught what to do in order to be able to do your job effectively....  also.. started talking to a cute guy, low key crushing a bit.. just a tiny bit not much, but i’ve definitely been enjoying our video calls and late night random dnm sessions. 

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Here we go

So it’s been quite awhile since i last typed, it feels like that anyway. I am starting work in a few days. I actually feel nervous and I think I’ll always be nervous starting a new job.I was quite surprised that I even got this job honestly.. Not sure if it was luck or if my abilities are more than I think they are. Still feeling weird about the past few months... I can’t believe I’ve been a single woman for about 6 months and counting now. I really didn’t think i’d be single again if I’m being honest. Still weird to think about but past few days i’ve been feeling so blissful honestly.. Not sure if it’s the addition of jogging which means extra endorphins or... but I’ve been feeling good...... it almost feels too good but at the same time i definitely enjoy it.  *Update* I was actually not nervous at all LOL as i thought it would be. I want to document this journey so I need to make sure I am writing on this blog every few days at least. The company culture is definitely different to the one I was in previously. Let’s give it a month to see how it goes. It seems as though they are going through a company restructure by the looks of things and are hiring so many people at once.  It’s actually kind of daunting to see how many people they are hiring during this busy period honestly. They use this app called Dingtalk which has all all kinds of differnt features inside it.. kind of crazy honestly. First day was actually not too bad, content overload which is the usual, second day learnt how to post an ad on ebay and then learnt about the reporting systems used to look at sales and profit margin... which was interesting.. They said that the team might become so big that they need to split up everyone in different places to manage different areas.. I mean being a marketing assistant in an e commerce company isn’t so bad.. since i’ll be learning a lot for sure... Today is sunday and i’ve made it a goal for myself to practice cook to upskill myself there as I realise, I can cook basic stuff but if i really want to learn i need to start doing it myself. As much as i love parents and appreciate them cooking but I’m a very independent person who wants to learn how to do everything by themselves... I’ve grown and have been taught that way...  The pandemic in aus has now gotten a lot worst so we shall see where everything heads this week. Masks are compulsory from wednesday if you need to leave the house for various reasons. Oh.. I had a call with my ex a few days ago.. and well that was quite interesting. It definitely solidified that I am indeed over him.. I thought it would take me much longer if i’m being honest... I didnt think i would be over him during this time. It also made me realise that it was best for both of us to go our separate ways..  It was also interesting to hear what reasons he would tell people why we broke up.. because we all know in an event of a breakup there are always 2 sides to every story.. and his reason was valid- we distanced- mine was definitely too complicated.. So i’m definitely going to be using that reason from now on, so much easier to say that than what i’ve been telling every guy i meet. OOLOL....

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To a new book.

Beginning of a new book..

Can you believe that we're in June already? This year has definitely turned out to be the roller coaster that you see from a far and dread going on it as you're lining up but feels exciting and exhilarating once it's done. 

 Let's start off with my year so far. As cliche as this next part is going to sound but boy has it been a journey and abit.

 -Ended a 2.5 year relationship and so I thought to myself surely things can't go worst from here. 

-Handed in my letter of resignation for the end of March; end of March comes around and here we are about to enter a lockdown. Decided to give these good old dating apps a try, just for fun- nothing serious at all. It's opened my eyes to the scariest reality that it's come to this point where swiping left and right is how you could potentially meet our partner? For me it solidified 99% of the stereotypes that I assumed I would be meeting on these apps. It also opened my eyes to the fact that I want to organically meet someone in real life as oppose to swiping right and then texting eachother.

 Look, each to their own. It's just not for me. This quarantine has made me realise that I love the human connection that we get without realising it; the smiles, the good mornings from our neighbours, the hugs and kisses and lastly the bond between a normal human that is ingrained in all of us. 

 Though there are some days I definitely want to be left alone and just enjoy the comfort of myself but during this pandemic it's made me realise how precious the human connection is. 

 We're about 3 months into the quarantine now and I want to address the fact that we've been through a Bush fire and a Pandemic. With what's been happening all around the world it's honestly feels like the world is crying out for help one last time before it throws in the towel. It still baffles me to think that right now we're all globally going through the same motion and seeing how each country responds to it, is eye opening. 

 Personally this quarantine has brought more clarity to my mental and physical health. With what had happened prior to the lockdown it was like the world was telling me that this book ending now, let's write a new one. It truly has felt like that. 

 Though there are some days where I go through the motions of sadness, confused,dazed or even annoyed but the best thing about it, it never lasts long and it's only made me stronger through this quarantine. I've never appreciated the little things in life so much up until I was faced with the reality that it could be taken away from me. 

I've been out and about in nature about 50% more than I was previously but this time it was different... I'm not sure if it's because I've gone through a breakup and am searching for the meaning of work..but all I know is i've been loving going on walks, waterfalls and exploring nature more. It's not only been refreshing but also a soul soother. 

 To the first post and many more.

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[itsjayeee-blog]

13 January 2015

Well today was full of rains and storms but i loved it. I am definitely what you call a winter baby i love the rain i love the gloomy weather in fact it makes me even more motivated than normal weather. I'm not so much a summer person but i have to admit i do love the sun and the sunsets because they look absolutely gorgeous. Today seemed to be a day where everyone around me is experiencing something negative. I'm all about positive vibes but it's hard to be the positive one in the group when everyone else around you has a black cloud on top of their heads. Despite everyone else being so negative and not being happy today, i found that through the storm and cloudy weather my other half is bringing me back to life. It's honestly such a cliche shit to say true? but he is honestly the burst of colour that never fails to brighten up my day. Below is a picture of a beautiful sunset near my house, i absolutely love sunsets and sunrises.

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Ballerina decks by Henry Leutwyler

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12 January 2015

Yet another day has passed and what am i doing? sitting here in my room typing this... Today wasn't all that well but hey it's better than most days. I had received a small package in the mail today which was fun, it's my new lime crime lipstick colour in ' airborne unicorn' and i must say it's definitely out of my comfort zone but i really love it, i love purples,pinks,blacks,reds you name ill love it, except orange undertone lipsticks, i look horrendous in them for some odd reason.  You know about 3 months ago i was keen and eager to start uni, but after getting my results, i was less than eager and keen i was depressed,shocked and in disbelief... The hard work that i had put in did not match the score at all, and i realised that sometimes the effort that you put in you don't always get back in return. Took me a few days to suck it up but i moved on, nevertheless im still somewhat sad because i wanted to get a score that reflected my efforts and my hard work to prove myself wrong and to make my parents proud but hey, life doesn't always go the way you want it true?

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1 week already?

Okay.. So it's been a week since 2015 started and i havent written in it and i know i know, so much for for saying i'll write in it but honestly nothing exciting has been happening in my life... Except for today i had received some of my lime crime lipsticks and i was beyond excited. Probably the most exciting-EST thing that has happened all week. Man, i really need to go out more don't i? welp... anyways i'm super excited that i'm giving two to my best friend because both of us love makeup, drugstore, high end, low end we  love them all and to be able to share that love and passion with someone else is amazing! Anyways i brought them in a bundle of three with the colours: Glamour 101, Retrofuturinist and Centrfushia. I absolutely love all three but i love the Retro one enough to buy another one too! Can't wait to post up the pictures later on, but i love this pink,it's dark but bright but pink , love it! Well that's all for today until tomorrow or hopefully when i receive my other packages with Anatasia beverly hill brow stuff, which i am super keen about.

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First of the First -Twenty Fifteen

This year i plan to restart tumblr, as a journal for myself and maybe a goal setting reminder. But more of a diary to keep track of this year. I wan to be able to write in this often as i can unless my days are boring as hell of course. It's new years and im basically in my room typing this right now at 12:29. Have to admit it feels good to be able to type what im feeling. I was really keen for 2015, but not so much now, i'm somewhat happy but eh about it. Well guess this will be it for the first post, we'll just leave it at that why dont we. till next time   -jayee