itsmelcstuff

[itsmelcstuff]

From isolation to proposal

As a  newcomers to Canada experience a roller coaster of emotions, moving from known to unknown, from employed to unemployed, from being part of a community to being a nobody in the middle of a new culture, it’s always undetermined! It affects one’s physical, mental, emotion, Spiritual, Religious, social and subjective.

Philippines

The Philippines is a tropical island. It has only two seasons: the wet and dry season. Of course, with the thousands of islands to discover, such as Cebu and Palawan, a summery feel is a requirement for the best trip to this gem in the Pacific. The dry season starts in late November and ends in May. The rainy seasons starts in June and lasts till October. September and October are often the typhoon season in the Philippines.

Although foreign visitors think that it is always summer in the Philippines, the Filipinos think and feel summer in April and May—the hottest months in the Philippines. The sky is at its bluest and the water at its clearest during this time of the year. During these months Tours on Cebu are amazing and Island Hoping Tours are spectacular. If you are visiting Philippines in other months, private city tours and local home-cooked dinners are some great ways to explore the beauty and local lifestyle of this country.

Canada

When I first arrived to Canada

I came to Canada year 2011 as a caregiver.During my first days, everything was exciting and intriguing, simply because it is different.  Any problems are accepted as part of the newness.

  Canada is an amazing place.  I like it’s natural landscape. I can see the natural resources are preserved, the wild animals, the trees, mountains, oceans, and others. 

Experience about the transit was a memorable one to me because it is really organize, there are designated bus stops to load and unload passengers, there’s  a schedule for the bus to come.

 At  winter time,  I like it when snowing but hope it wouldn’t last long on the ground because it’s annoying if you slip and fall.

 I love spring time, It is so great! Different kinds of flowers is one of my weakneses.  I feel relax when I’m staring at them. I usually go to Elizabeth park, Vandusen gardens or any park that I could see flowers.

Summer is fun!  I love to go in the farm and enjoy picking up blueberries.  Having barbeque party in the park, go hiking, biking, camping.

I call The world is painted when falls.  The leaves from the trees turning into different kinds of colors and dramatically fall on the ground leaving its colors.

On my 3rd month in Canada, I began to feel lonely, I feel homesick, thinking about my home country and its qualities forgetting my reasons of coming here.   I miss my family so much and I cannot avoid myself not to get worried about them though i talk to them on video call via internet every night.

This is our motto “ A family together never part maybe in distance, but never at heart”. 

As months passed by,  feelings of rejection occurs on me. I was feeling isolated and depressed.  I have trouble speaking the language,  finding my favorite foods and handling a cold temperature.  I started to feel very old and thought about my status of living back home was over. There was lack of separation between work and home along with the lack of time for myself. I then generate anger towards my new country.

I’m under the  Live-in caregiver program so there’s a chance for me to become a permanent resident together with my family. When I earned the required (3,900) hours of work that was year 2013 I submitted my application for open work visa together with my application for permanent residency.  After three months my open work permit approved,  a year after my permanent residency was approved together with my family.

My family arrived here in Canada 2015.  We are very happy that we are together again.  They like Canada though, it’s hard for them to adjust too.

However, The feelings of rejection, isolation and frustration didn’t go away.  Two months after’ since my family arrived, I lost my job.  My  last employer released me.  I am not capable as a live-in caregiver anymore (they need someone to stay with their kid during the night) because i want to be with my family every night sleeping with them. I applied for my Employment Insurance and I got approved.  But it doesn’t took that long. I had it for six months.  I was so worried about financial matters, paying house rents, bills, transportation, foods and others.

I go to a non-profit organization who help  new comers to settle in Canada. So I applied as a member to them. First they require me to do the English assessment I got level 6. I want to upgrade my English.  In that non-profit organization they are giving free of English class. During the class we touch a topic about GOAL ........the result or achievement toward which effort is directed.  I was enlighten about the definition of GOAL I think this is the one I really need to st up.  My teacher let us to set our Own GOAL.  Goal-setting comprises a major component of personal development and management. Goals can be long-term, intermediate, or short-term. The primary difference is the time required to achieve them.

Short-term goals expect accomplishment in a short period of time. The time frame for a short-term goal relates to its context in the overall time line that it is being applied.  For example, a short-term goal for a month-long project in days;  whereas one might measure a short-term goal for someone’s lifetime in months or in years.  Planners usually define short-term goals in relation to long-term goals.

PERSONAL GOALS

Managing goals can give returns in all areas of personal life. Knowing what one wants to achieve makes clear what to concentrate and improve on, and often subconsciously prioritizes that goal. Goal setting and planning ("goal work") promotes long-term vision and short-term motivation. It focuses intention, desire, acquisition of knowledge, and helps to organize resources. Efficient goal work includes recognizing and resolving all guilt, inner conflict or limiting belief that might cause one to sabotage one's efforts. By setting clearly defined goals, one can subsequently measure and take pride in the accomplishment of those goals. One can see progress in what might have seemed a long, perhaps difficult, grind.

ACHIEVING PERSONAL GOALS

Achieving complex and difficult goals requires focus, long-term diligence and effort (see Goal pursuit). Success in any field requires forgoing excuses and justifications for poor performance or lack of adequate planning; in short, success requires emotional maturity. The measure of belief that people have in their ability to achieve a personal goal also affects that achievement. Long-term achievements rely on short-term achievements. Emotional control over the small moments of the single day makes a big difference in the long term.

PERSONAL GOAL ACHIEVEMENT AND HAPPINESS

There has been a lot of research conducted looking at the link between achieving desired goals, changes to self-efficacy and integrity and ultimately changes to subjective well-being. Goal efficacy refers to how likely an individual is to succeed in achieving their goal. Goal integrity refers to how consistent one's goals are with core aspects of the self.  A focus on goal efficacy is associated with well-being factor happiness (subjective well-being) and goal integrity is associated with the well-being factor meaning (psychology).  Shows that achieving goals that hold personal meaning to an individual increases feelings of subjective well-being.

SELF-COCORDANCE MODEL The self-concordance model is a model that looks at the sequence of steps that occur from the commencement of a goal to attaining that goal. It looks at the likelihood and impact of goal achievement based on the type of goal and meaning of the goal to the individual.[citation needed] Different types of goals impact both goal achievement and the sense of subjective well-being brought about by achieving the goal. The model breaks down factors that promote, first, striving to achieve a goal, then achieving a goal, and then the factors that connect goal achievement to changes in subjective well-being.

SELF-CONCORDANT GOAL

Goals that are pursued to fulfill intrinsic values or to support an individual's self-concept are called self-concordant goals. Self-concordant goals fulfill basic needs and align with what psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott called an individual's "True Self". Because these goals have personal meaning to an individual and reflect an individual's self-identity, self-concordant goals are more likely to receive sustained effort over time. In contrast, goals that do not reflect an individual's internal drive and are pursued due to external factors (e.g. social pressures) emerge from a non-integrated region of a person and are therefore more likely to be abandoned when obstacles occur. "Those who attain self-concordant goals reap greater well-being benefits from their attainment. Attainment-to-well-being effects are mediated by need satisfaction.  Example is, daily activity-based experiences of autonomy, competence, and relatedness that accumulate during the period of striving. The model is shown to provide a satisfactory fit to 3 longitudinal data sets and to be independent of the effects of self-efficacy, implementation intentions, avoidance framing, and life skills."

Furthermore, self-determination theory and research surrounding this theory shows that if an individual effectively achieves a goal, but that goal is not self-endorsed or self-concordant, well-being levels do not change despite goal attainment.

To help you figure out the things you do to set a goal is Using the 5 W....Who?, Where?, When?, What?, Why? and  Include How. These questions are the great help in achieving one’s goal.

I search for a job that i like. But unfortunately i didn’t find one.  Employers asking me a Canadian certificate or diploma. I was so upset how could it be happened that i could get one, I’m too old to get back to school.

Until one day, i go walk in  the Work BC and ask for help  to find me a job. So they let me filled a form for my records.  They send me to a case manager who will guide me.  She required me to go and attend workshops.  And continue to do the job search and should be recorded, and submit it to my case manager.  All the job search that i did, asking me to submit a Canadian certificate or Diploma. I finished all the requirements. Then the government approved my application for the grant.  They send me to school to get a course.

I was referred to Vancouver Career College to enroll in a program that will pave my way to my career choice.  Actually I’m almost done with it.  And I’m sure I could find a good job soon!

Any kind of rejection, no matter if it's in love, your career, friends, a book proposal or anything else, is not something that should affect how happy you are. Rejection doesn't feel great and sometimes it feels unfathomable but it shouldn't be something you permit to take away happiness from your life. The reality of life is that rejection will form a part of it––there will be occasions when your job application, your date request or your ideas for change will be rejected by someone, somewhere. It is a healthy attitude to accept that rejection is a part of life and to acknowledge that what really matters is finding the way to bounce back and try again.

Be brave to conquer any trials in life.  Think positively and find solutions to your problem.