j-l-kepler - Tumblr blog

[j-l-kepler]

English added by me :)

[j-l-kepler]

Me, watching my kitten hold still for a suspiciously long time: Ollie, are you peeing on my floor?

Ollie: Not

Me: Are you sure?

Ollie, grunting through time and space to push out a chocolate mcmuffin wider than he is tall: Not

[j-l-kepler]

Pour one out for a real one.

[j-l-kepler]

my brother sent me this photo of his cat and i’m gonna lose my mind. he looks like a kingdom hearts character 

[j-l-kepler]

[j-l-kepler]

[j-l-kepler]

Avoiding Chub Rub this Summer

Hey so if you're a person whose thighs touch when you walk and you want to wear skirts, shorts, or swimsuits this summer without chub rub this is the quick guide from a fat person who enjoys wearing skirts.

For those who don't know, Chub Rub is a painful burn that’s caused by friction, which generates when bare thighs rub together during walking and running and is exacerbated by heat and sweat.

There are two main ways to avoid Chub Rub, broadly speaking.

The first one is:

Physical Barriers work by keeping your thighs covered in fabric so they don't touch and chafe.

Bike Shorts -Pro: Comfortable, stretchy, has pockets. Perfect if your skirt is longer than your shorts and not sheer. Super good in the winter. -Cons: Hot, almost never come in neutral or skin tones, so they’ll show up under anything sheer.

Bandelettes- Thigh bands that stay in place with a silicone strip. They can be cute, like garter belts, or simple. -Pros: Comfortable. Can be sexy, More discreet than shorts, Excellent choice if you want an exposed midriff. They stay in place all day. Easier bathroom access then shapewear or bike shorts. -Cons: No pockets. May not be wide enough to be effective for extra good thighs. Silicone bands that hold them in place can pull hairs and be painful.

Shapewear -Pros: Almost always come in skin tones. Shape the booty, slide really well. Cooler than bike shorts. -Cons: Extra difficult bathroom access, often high waisted and long so they don’t work well with short skirts. rarely have pockets.

The big con to this category is that you're limited in how short your skirt can be since for the shorts and bandelettes to work they need to be long enough to cover all parts of your thighs that touch when you walk. Depending on the shape of your legs, thighs, and your gait that could mean your shorts are pretty long. For me, I'd need my shorts to be almost knee length to be effective.

Knee length shorts under mini skirts aren't for me. Which is where the second category comes in!

The title says it all. These are various kinds of gels and stuff that you apply directly to your thighs to keep they sliding smoothly past one another without chafing.

The big pro of this category is that all the products are Invisible so they work with every fit, no matter the size of the thighs! They’re even useful when wearing swim suits. Just remember to reapply after you get out of the water. The cons are that some formulas can cause breakouts, and most will need to be reapplied several times throughout the day so you’ll have to carry it around with you. None of these specific brands gave me breakouts, but my skin is not your skin.

There are other anti chafing gels and creams and sticks out there, but these are ones I've tried and like very much.

Monistat anti chafing gel Lasts: 3-5 hours Invisible, cooling, feels great on the skin. Works even through high heat and sweat. I’m sensitive to textures and the powder-like feel of this stuff when it’s dry is amazing. I'm not sure if it's "waterproof" but I sweat in my thigh area a lot and this stuff really sticks it out like a dream. It lasts far longer then I do between bathroom breaks so I just reapply it each time I use the bathroom and let it dry on my thighs for a minute.

Megababe Thigh Rescue Lotion Anti-Chafe Stick Lasts: 3 hours The deodorant stick makes application easy and fast, It goes on smooth and feels fine! Comes in a mini version that makes it easy to keep on your person and reapply through the day. The big con is that this stuff melts kind easy on hot days. which makes a mess in your bag or pocket. It doesn’t do great with sweat and will need to be reapplied more often. It's unscented.

Skin Slick spray Lasts: 4-5 hours. This comes in an aerosol can so it’s not an option if you’re flying. Outside of that, it’s great. Feels nice and keeps your thighs cool. Goes on fast and easy, works well even when you’re sweating because it’s designed for sports. The best option for beach days.

To finish this post off here are some commonly suggested chub rub hacks i don't recommend and why. Deodorant- ineffective and if you use the wrong kind, it can actually make it worse. Baby Powder: Okay so this a mixed bag. Over all, it does work pretty well for a short time. And who can deny that there isn't much that feels better then a healthy sprinkle of baby powder down your shorts on a sweaty day. It soaks up your sweat and makes you feel cool and dry. The problem is that it doesn't work for very long before needing to be reapplied, by which time the previously applied powder is clumping. Not to mention it leaves white powder all over the place. I'll be honest, I often put this stuff in my bag when I'm going to be outside all day in the hot sun. At pride, summer festivals, hikes, camping, fairs, I always have it with me just in case. But I have to be a little desperate to bust it out because it makes such a mess and smells so strongly. It's a last resort.

The Chub Rub Patch- This is the absolute worst thing I've ever tried for chub rub. It's essentially a large band aid with no pad that you stick on your inner thighs. Throughout the day, the edges of these patches kept getting caught on one another and starting to peel and stick to my other thighs which gave me worse chub rub then if i had used nothing. I thought maybe I applied them wrong, so I tried them again the next day, this time taking care to make sure my thighs were clean and dry before applying. Same thing happened. And they hurt to take off. Like a band aid. They're single use, and pretty expensive. They come in one size, so they won't work for a lot of bigger thighs. These suck. They're ugly as fuck too. Do not use these things.

Body/baby oil- This is a very effective way to fry up your thighs. After a day of walking around you're thighs will look just like fried chicken.

Body Lotion- a move i've only ever seen attempted out of real desperation. This is a bad idea. The lotion rubs in so fast that you won't get ten steps before needing more. If you're chub rub is bad enough that you're trying this hack, it's time to find a pharmacy and get some Monistat anti chafing gel. I once saw a woman at a pride tie two trash bags around her thighs and it worked better then lotion.

Happy Summer Everyone! And don't forget sunscreen! Especially if you have dark skin because dark skinned people are significantly more likely to die of skin cancer in the USA and Europe then light skinned people. Even if you don't think you'll burn that day, you're still being irradiated by the sun!

[j-l-kepler]

David and Catherine have got a new business…

[j-l-kepler]

i’m such a “i want your attention” but “won’t bother you” kinda person

[j-l-kepler]

Wow wtf HIV/AIDS was discovered by Flossie Wong-Staal, an Chinese-American woman, and she’s the reason the HIV test even exists. AND THEN she invented the molecular knife that lead to treatments for HIV/AIDS. And she’s STILL ALIVE. We don’t hear about the contributions of Women of Color enough, my word. Madness.

[j-l-kepler]

i always forget how fucking adorable gen 3 sandshrew is

is baby

[j-l-kepler]

ARMPIT TUTORIAL!!!!!!!!!!!! was posting this on twitter but popping it up here too in hopes it's helpful for folks here too! :>

[j-l-kepler]

my blog is a safe space for me. the rest of you are in danger i think

[j-l-kepler]

horrible news guys…. i want to be in love

[j-l-kepler]

Bothersome beast, comforting friend

[j-l-kepler]

sure, i'll drink the pink swirly potion that released a little heart shaped cloud when you uncorked it. what's the worst that could happen

[j-l-kepler]

this is what GOOD pussy sounds like [geiger counter noises]