jaesrri

[jaesrri]

This is the jam that won second place in the 2021 show. As you can tell from the label, it’s made from raspberries and gooseberries - (because I didn’t have enough of either to make a batch of jam) - and furthermore was filtered to preserve the jammy goodness without the niggling horror of raspberry seeds.

But when i went to collect it after the points-tallying, I saw that the competitor ID number had been swapped. Deliberately and with competitive intent, Competitor 75 had walked past the table, spotted the second place prize, and jumbled our labels so THEY would have more points to the Domestic category, catapulting them to contendorship in the Champion Cup.

The labels were taped down; I was most DEFINITELY Competitor 144; and the taped label with 144 on it had been in place for the jam-judging (Jam Made From Your Own Fruit.) Competitor 75 had unstuck the tape and swapped labels before the judges came around again for the final point tally.

But what were the damages? Although I swanned off with a disruptive first place in the Cakes Made From (your own) Vegetables Category, I was nowhere near dominating the Domestic category, so losing the points didn’t mean I missed my chance at the championship. My vegetables, while pleasant in their own way, failed to place higher than third. And community is important. And the comedy of it.

I said nothing on the day and made a Bit about it instead. I have gotten a lot of mileage out of the Bit.

Anyway, end result: the 2022 jam has to dominate. Watch this space.

[jaesrri]

a couple months ago i was bordering on an autistic meltdown bc i was too sweaty and my friend said "it's amazing. i've never met a person with a higher tolerance for pain and a lower tolerance for mild discomfort."

i think about that every single day now every time i'm experiencing any discomfort.

[jaesrri]

libsoftiktok going after a beloved inventor furry for some reason

if you're wearing a fitbit, you're using spottacus's technology. be grateful.

[jaesrri]

"The US could stop the genocide in Gaza tomorrow!" Yes. As the biggest weapons supplier, the US could stop the genocide. But so could the EU, and that's not getting enough attention.

Israel's economy couldn't survive without the EU, not even for a short time. The EU is Israel’s largest trading partner and the biggest investor in Israel (nearly twice as big as the United States) and the EU is the main destination for Israeli investment.

Firm economic sanctions by the EU would not be some long term pressure builder, they would have immediate effect. The EU could stop the genocide in Gaza tomorrow. They choose not to.

[jaesrri]

It's so very fitting that the final brawl between Holmes and Moriarty (at least, as portrayed in the episode "The Final Problem") involves no weapons and no wits. For all their cleverness, for all they act like courteous gentlemen in a sophisticated intellectual game, in the end they're unrefinedly pushing and choking each other before, as promised, they drag each other down from the waterfall. It's brutal, and revealing of how when you strip away their artifices they're fundamentally just people, engaged in the most basic fight: beat the other, whatever the cost.

[jaesrri]

It’s finally happened.

After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.

“I like your shoelaces.”

Oh. Oh no.

I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president…and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”

The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”

Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.

Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.

[jaesrri]

i was opening up the nature center and a little wasp flew by while i unlocked the door so i let him out. then i looked down, and there was a spider, a millipede, and two rollie-pollie bugs waiting at the door and they all walked out in a line like they’d been at a party together overnight.

it’s been two weeks and i can’t stop thinking about it.

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Me: I would like to adopt a cat.

GPS: Okay! Here are directions to the shelter you want to go to.

Me: Wonderful! -drives there-

Me: ...

Me: ...This is a grove of trees.

GPS: Yes. :)

Me: I put in the address for the animal shelter.

GPS: Yes. :)

Me: So...where is it?

GPS: Here. :)

Me: Just to be clear, I want to adopt a cat. Not have myself be adopted by the fey.

GPS: :) Have you considered following the stone path over this mysterious hill? :)

Me: ...Sure. Why fucking not.

Me: Huh. Look at that. An animal shelter.

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Transfems read this thread

[jaesrri]

Like to charge, reblog to cast

[jaesrri]

god I could be so wealthy if I had no ethics. that's so fucking frustrating. I'm living paycheck to paycheck because I'm not grifting vulnerable idiots on TikTok. I feel like I have the ability to very easily scam people. I could make a killing with AI. but god. I have morals and ethics and so I get to be poor as shit. I hate this fucking world

[jaesrri]

Facebook implemented this new thing in some groups where an AI will ask questions to the group, for the purpose of compiling answers and making an AI generated FAQ.

What Facebook failed to realize is that most of its users don't like AI in general and the Meta AI in particular is such an obnoxious piece of shit that even neutral parties hate that one in particular.

So everyone in every group I'm in has started feeding it bullshit answers on purpose. For example in a chicken group I'm in the AI asked how to train chickens to return to their coop in the evening and the most popular answers were usually hookers and blow.

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helen “trans people are perpetuating gender steriotypes” joyce is now upset that the scientific american is writing about how women were hunters too back in the day, not just mothers and caretakers. feminist win!

[jaesrri]

My husband was overjoyed that his misogynist coworker finally quit. THE next day a different coworker came out as transfemme.

Imagine being such a shit toward women that one of them just waits in the closet until the moment you’re gone.

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I made this so now all y'all have to look at it.

[jaesrri]

Getting revenge is fun but tormenting Danny is funnier

[jaesrri]

on the topic of Specialest Little Guys Ever, Kaladin IS pretty special, but it's interesting that unlike the Stormfather who chose lighteyed now-royalty powerful warlords to show visions and speak prophecy to, ensuring that the whole continent's agency wraps around the Kholins like a mantle, the Wind DID pick Just Some Guy to help survive long enough to become special so that he might someday in turn choose to help the spren