jakdsmaygar-blog

[jakdsmaygar-blog]

The headline is where most of us blow it

Forget everything you think works in a headline, everything you've ever read, and everything your friends tell you. The majority of it is BS. Read what's coming here, and you'll be way ahead of everyone else.

Along with your main profile picture, the headline is the first thing women look at, and it doesn't even have to be good Dating sites for bisexuals to draw women in. Yeah, I know that doesn't make sense and it goes against what everyone else is saying.

Let me explain. The fact is that your headline isn't going to get women to respond to you; you just have to make sure that it isn't so bad that it keeps them from reading your profile.

When we used popular, catchy, cute, funny, or romantic headlines the number of women who contacted us dropped-which meant that everything we'd ever read on headlines was wrong.

Your pictures are what are going to get them to look further, and the headline can prevent this. So, keep the headline simple.

But I thought I was supposed to be different...

Yeah, it's a good idea to separate yourself from the crowd, and you can do that in the headline but it's too risky so early in the process. You ARE going to show your uniqueness, but you're going to wait a little bit. Get your hooks in first.

The problem is that there are principles that apply in attraction that people misapply when writing their headlines.

Qualifying a woman is a necessary step in attracting any woman, but attempting to qualify in the headline always backfires.

Headlines like "Yeah, you're beautiful, but what else do you have going for you?" Or "What do you have to offer?" are written and proposed by wannabe players and guys who don't understand how to apply the principles of attraction. These guys just come off as rude, arrogant and socially inept. She has no reason to qualify herself to you yet.

You will make her qualify herself to you, but you need to lay the groundwork first and build attraction, otherwise you're going to get blown out right away. You have to get her interested first. You're going to make your headline innocuous, build attraction in the profile, and ask her to qualify herself in her first response to you. Sometimes she will, sometimes she won't, but either way you win because you've shown her that you're selective and expect a lot from your women.

How about making a connection immediately with a movie quote or famous quote? Don't do it. Yes, it creates an immediate shared interest, and shared interests do bond people, but this is another case of misapplying basic principles.

The problem with movie quotes, quotes from famous people, or your favorite mantra is that they weed out people who might be interested in you if they'd gotten far enough to read your profile. But they didn't identify with the quote and clicked right by you.

Using your headline as a screening process.

With that said, there might be times when you want to use your headline so it selects for a certain kind of woman or someone with a particular interest.

If you only want to date Trekkies, go ahead and put a Star Trek quote in your headline.

Likewise, if you are looking for something specific, say a third for you and your girlfriend, a headline that says "Hot couple looking for a third." is going get women who are already looking for a threesome to respond.

But if you can get someone to read your profile, and mention in the profile that you're looking for a third, you are going to be able to get women who weren't initially interested in a threesome to consider it. Opens up a world of possibilities, doesn't it?

Using your headline to attract someone with common interests.

Headlines like "Cook looking for a taste tester," and "marathon runner looking for a partner," drew in the second most responses, so they work. And they have the advantage of attracting someone with a common interest. We didn't test these as much as we did some other headlines, so the data are not as clear-cut. But we think that if you're going to write a headline on your own, common interest headlines are a good start.

Obviously, the number of women who respond is going to go down, but that might be compensated by the fact that you have a certain connection with those who do. Also, we had women who wrote to us even though they didn't share an interest we listed in our headline.