jakesbitch

[jakesbitch]

he’s so baby

[jakesbitch]

So I used to belly dance and sometimes I think about what it’d be like to teach the boys how. Here’s how I think it’d go.

Josh: Enthusiastic but gets distracted 5 minutes in. Absolutely loves the hip scarf. His favorite thing to learn is the hip shimmy just because of the jingle noise.

Jake: Acts like he’s not interested, but fucking loves it. Gets upset if he can’t get a move down right. Loves learning arm moves

Sam: 100% not fully interested but is the one that’s actually good at it. Making jokes until he learns about some of the props. Wants to learn how to balance a sword. Try’s to poke everyone else if given the sword

Danny: Is focused and actually trying to learn. Gets most of the moves right. Really fucking good with veil work. Nails the body rolls every single time.

Bonus: Jake and Sam are obsessed with trying to learn how to do the stomach roll thing (no clue the proper name) just cause it freaks so many people out

[jakesbitch]

I AM LOSING MY MIND

[jakesbitch]

the feminine urge to have this man's children

[jakesbitch]

Here's some cute gifs of Jake being Jake

[jakesbitch]

I saw a comment on tik tok that said that

Josh was born to smile

I think about this a lot

[jakesbitch]

i don’t want kids and hate the idea of being pregnant but i passed the ultrasound room at the doctor today and was like “aw wouldn’t it be cute to go w jake and see our lil kid how tender and sweet would that be” and i want to rip out my brain after that

WHAT ARE THESE MEN DOING TO US

[jakesbitch]

Christmas Morning - Jake Kiszka

Title: Christmas Morning

Synopsis: The best way to spend Christmas morning was with your little family.

Warnings: None. Just fluff. Dad Jake as well.

Word count: 825

Authors note: Enjoy this dad Jake fic. I really hope you all like it!

_____

High pitched giggles echoed from down the hall, quickly approaching with feet slapping against the hardwood floors. The two who were responsible for the noise were racing down the hallway to your bedroom. If you hadn’t known what today was, you’d be scolding them right about now. A few seconds later, you could hear the loud whispers of your eldest telling her younger sister to be quiet before turning the doorknob slowly. You quickly shut your eyes and pretended to be fast asleep. The silence from them creeping up to the bed was interrupted by your two girls jumping onto their father, startling him awake. 

Keep reading

[jakesbitch]

Josh: i love sleepovers Jake: this isn’t a sleepover, you’re in the hospital Josh: then why do i have this nightgown Jake: that’s a hospital gown Josh: truth or dare Jake: Josh: Jake: dare

[jakesbitch]

good morning what the fuck

[jakesbitch]

I love this photo and it's context

"Do you have anything less offensive then purple? "

[jakesbitch]

the boys with nose rings 😋

[jakesbitch]

i am in tears rn 

[jakesbitch]

For @ageofflowerpower 💛

[jakesbitch]

spectacular

[jakesbitch]

GUYS THIS IS SO CUTE

[jakesbitch]

📸: @gretavanfleet