jedi-starbird

[jedi-starbird]

a while ago I read this sci-fi short story from the 50s where a guy is kidnapped and interrogated by aliens using a very sophisticated lie detector, but he realizes that the lie detector works off technical truth, and with some careful phrasing and misdirection, he manages to make them believe that humans are a race of immortal, overpowered, omniscient telepathic beings. and it works.

my favorite part is when he tells them that humans are "capable of transportation without the aid of spaceships or any vehicles, just by using mental power to control physical matter". it's true, we can. it's called walking.

[jedi-starbird]

This is what I'm saying! These two bitches are the temple's best improv team. Their "Yes, and-" game is unparalleled, they are committed to peace, justice and the jedi way but most importantly they are committed to the fucking bit.

The funniest thing about this scene is that there is zero pre-communication about doing this bit, Obi-Wan just 100% flings himself into pretending that Qui-Gon is a notorious sadistic killer, like this horrible gremlin is faking LOOKING SICK at just the THOUGHT of what Qui-Gon might do if someone crossed him and Qui-Gon is playing right along, THESE TWO ARE THE WORST I LOVE THEM. (Star Wars: The Living Force | John Jackson Miller)

[jedi-starbird]

Introducing the Star Wars Reference Wiki!

Introducing the Star Wars Fic Reference Wiki, a wiki for fic writers by fic writers!

The Star Wars Fic Reference Wiki is intended as a way for fic writers and other fanwork creators to easily look up pertinent information without having to slog through dense paragraphs or comb through categories with dozens or even hundreds of entries with few indicators of what the pages are. Do you want lists? Do you want tables? Do you want easily digestible bullet points? We've got 'em!

We build pages from common questions we or other fic writers have, such as:

All these fics incorporate events from Jedi Apprentice, but what really happened to Obi-Wan Kenobi in Legends?

How do the stories in Revenge of the Sith and The Clone Wars mesh together?

Which characters are LGBTQIA+? Who are some LGBTQIA+ creators who have worked on a Star War? How about a timeline of LGBTQIA+ people and content?

BBY/ABY, BrS/GrS, BFE/AFE... what's the difference between these and all those other calendars? What calendar do characters use before the Battle of Yavin?

What are some idioms or kriffing swears this character could use to sound more Star Wars-y?

Does the GFFA have its own version of a grilled cheese sandwich with tomato soup?

What could be used as a pack animal in one of the many, many deserts?

Why does this fic call him "Yan" or "Glamnor" Dooku? Is her full name Padmé Amidala Naberrie or something else?

How many costumes does Padmé wear? What about other SW costumes?

What are some canonical design options for a Kiffar OC's facial tattoo?

Are these the droids you're looking for?

Are you constantly losing those handy tumblr posts compiling useful resources? We have a permanent page for that!

(Swears in light mode; LGBTQIA+ characters in dark mode)

We've only recently started building the wiki, and are creating new pages all the time! We'd love help or suggestions for new pages. Have you never edited a wiki before? No problem! We have a tutorial for that. Are you not super confident about your English? No worries! Other wiki editors are here to help! We have a Discord server for the wiki, and side channels for things like SW fic recs and general fan chat.

Thank you for initial brainstorming and showing us there was an interest in and audience for this wiki, from us (facingthenorthwind and immithrax) to you: @nimata-beroya, @cacodaemonia, @elismor, @genericficerblog, @seth-shitposts, @takadasaiko, and @virusq!

Many hands make great wikis, so please, come on over and join us, and check back to see what new things we have in store! If you find our pages useful, we'd also love if you could spread the word, so other people can make use of the resources we've worked hard to create.

[jedi-starbird]

my lightsaber design proposal:

do you all see my vision.

[jedi-starbird]

i’ve been thinking about codywan a lot and i couldn’t help myself

[jedi-starbird]

<Lavender>

Tranquility and healing.

[jedi-starbird]

Learning that Obi-Wan was as much a little terror as Anakin as a kid gives me life 😌

[jedi-starbird]

When I look at my blorbos I am not a scientist trying to study them in a lab but Sam Reich on the set of Gamechanger.

[jedi-starbird]

Obi Wan’s message meant that all the surviving jedi knew he was alive. They couldn’t know about anyone else but they knew he lived. He looms so large in their rebellion because of his message. Quinlan carved his own message into the wall of the safehouse for any jedi but knowing only of Obi Wan. He must have been thinking of Obi Wan. Obi Wan immediately knew it was from him. It was intended for him

[jedi-starbird]

Qui-Gon, making a spinach and kale smoothie: My body is a temple Qui-Gon, adding in space cocaine: I never claimed to be religious though

[jedi-starbird]

Broke: Anakin doesn't have any jedi friends his own age because he didn't fit in/Palpatine isolated him

Woke: Anakin doesn't have any jedi friends his own age because all his classmates keep trying to sleep with his Master and it's driving him crazy. If ONE more person asks him for Obi-Wan’s number he's gonna scream.

Ahsoka: Skyguy! Did you know the senior padawans put out a yearbook?? You'll never guess who won MILF (Master I'd Like To Fuck) of the year!!!

Anakin, not looking up: It’s Obi-Wan.

Ahsoka: ...huh did you already see it?

Anakin, with a thousand yard stare: It's always Obi-Wan. It's been Obi-Wan for the last 10 years Snips.

[jedi-starbird]

what do you mean you can't make it today?? i booked the double lobotomy at claire's weeks ago

[jedi-starbird]

Qui-Gon: C'mon, where's your sense of whimsy padawan? Obi-Wan: I don't know! I guess maybe one of the people actively shooting at us hit it!

[jedi-starbird]

‘Qui-Gon made Obi Wan get the worst padawan haircut specifically to nerf him because he was getting way too pretty and Qui Gon feared his slut vibes’ is my favorite silly little headcanon about them sorry

[jedi-starbird]

Qui-Gon: Substance Abuse? I would never abuse substances, I love them.

[jedi-starbird]

Picture this: Padawan Obi-Wan somehow ends up backed into a corner without his lightsaber. Panicking, he grabs the first thing in his pockets, the river stone Qui-Gon gave him, and just. fucking launches it at the bad guy's head in a one kit KO.

Qui-Gon turns up 10 seconds later like I found your saber! are you alright padawan?? w-why are you cleaning blood off your river stone???

He thinks it's hilarious once Obi-Wan explains and keeps giving him bigger and bigger stones.

Next time they end up in a sticky situation Qui-Gon just hands Obi-Wan a large rock like go forth my padawan :)

[jedi-starbird]

it's fucking crazy to me how high-ranking obi-wan is during tcw. letting this guy spearhead an ATTACK BATTALION is like handing dwight d eisenhower a rifle and a bangalore and letting him storm the beaches of normandy himself. absolutely batshit INSANE