jellypear

[jellypear]

bruce storming into the manor because with WE in the news there’s been an influx of rumors and scandals and it’s fine if you make up lies about him that’s what he does for a living. but coming after his kids?

they’re all used to sly remarks being made about their backgrounds, things alluding to stereotypes and the such. but to outright claim that dick isn’t even an american citizen? too far.

he confronts dick, tells him he’s sorry about all this and he’ll have this rumor taken care of asap. he’s halfway done dialing the daily planet when dick is just nonchalantly like.

“rumor? b in their defense, i’m not a us citizen. i mean at least i don’t think i am?? i mean i never took the test.”

and bruce pauses and is like. what are you talking about of course you are you were born her- ohhhhhh. ohhhh yeah. oh yeah so actually i did in fact take you in on a whim cause the night your parents died the world traveling circus just so happened to be in gotham. and now he’s spiraling about how he could’ve let something like that slip.

he thinks to himself - did i just. never do that paper work? was there even paper work? how did he graduate high school- (it’s cuz ur rich bruce) and then he’s deleting clark’s number and starts dialing harvey’s instead.

jason listening in the back is like dude you voted this year and dick is like i think i’ve run for office ???

[jellypear]

[jellypear]

a sitting platypus

[jellypear]

have you lot heard about the tiktoker who’s taking on the actual government over a parking ticket? because she’s a hero

[jellypear]

[jellypear]

[jellypear]

Literal TEARS in my eyes rn

[jellypear]

remember when the tumblr ceo stalked a random trans woman offsite and posted about her on his blog and nothing of consequence for him ever happened of that. and tumblr admitting that they were banning trans women unfairly and then they kept doing that. like transfems you follow will suddenly disappear one day and sometimes the ones with bigger followings will reappear and get spread but you still will have mutuals who you just haven't seen for years because they were deleted without warning. and like shit just continues as if that didn't happen and it isn't still happening

[jellypear]

games where they have different art style for male and female characters where the men are photorealistic and the women look like smooth porcelain dolls. sorry i was watching the resident evil 9 trailer

[jellypear]

Easily the most annoying kind of vampire in the world are the ones where you finally corner the fuckers and when you're going in with the stake they start spouting off sociology 101 bullshit to try and weasel out of it. "Oh, no ethical consumption under capitalism," "oh, the rich are the real vampires if you think about it-" yeah, yeah, you ate like fifty homeless people, asshole. Hold still

[jellypear]

my roommate is a beast who can down 3 litres of hard cider, 6 energy drinks and an entire meat feast pizza in an hour. meanwhile i get a tummy ache if i walk too fast. i personally like to think this is the difference between dwarven and elven constitution.

[jellypear]

Moldy/unmoldy doomed yaoi or yuri?

you got it boss, here’s your doomed strawberry yuri

[jellypear]

no caption just vibes

you can watch the whole thing here!

[jellypear]

okay I’m gonna take a nap guys

[jellypear]

noncon but that girl eagerly consented to fucking the dragon. she really likes dragons actually. what she didn’t consent to was being filled with eggs at the end of it

[jellypear]

the tables have turned: my cat is ill and he's not a very good patient

[jellypear]

while I don’t agree with that referring to men in their 30s-early 40s as “old man yaoi”, I UNDERSTAND why many people who primarily consume honest-to-goodness BL manga are quicker to call it that, because there is just such poor representation for men that aren’t hairless dehydrated 20-something twunks. They’re wrong, but I get why it happens.

I also understand that “middle-aged yaoi” isn’t as fun to say as “old man yaoi”, even when it’s more technically accurate.

So I would like to propose new vocabulary: Grown Ass Yaoi. yaoi that’s grown ass men. they’re not old but they’re not young adults either. you get me? Grown Ass Yaoi