jem-crystairs

[jem-crystairs]

Physical therapy is wild because they're always like "hey do this weird little movement" and you're like "hmm my brain doesn't seem to know how to activate that movement" and then they'll like trick your brain into doing it by making you do other movements first or making you resist against them moving you or some shit and your brain is like oooooh ✅ new movement unlocked. And then they tell you to do that movement 20 times a day and you do and it makes some part of your body you didn't even know was related hurt less. What the fuck.

[jem-crystairs]

[jem-crystairs]

Everyone shut up! It’s the ten year anniversary

[jem-crystairs]

girl help they are making me do my job at work

[jem-crystairs]

my camel straight up told me "man i am not carrying another fucking straw" like wtf asshole its just one straw whats your fucking issue

[jem-crystairs]

Mammu! Finius and Ferbingetorix built Rome in a day!

[jem-crystairs]

Being an adult in this recession and being like wow I am totally "splurging" on 3 new sets of cotton underwear and 3 pairs of socks like whoaaaaa hold your horses duke of the land where's all this money gonna come from

[jem-crystairs]

"30 years old isn't old man" what privilege do you live in where your life expectancy is far past 30 years

This post blindsided me so bad I spent a full minute staring at it in shock

[jem-crystairs]

Could yall stop shooting each other outside my window im trying to masturbate

[jem-crystairs]

i always click the "track package" button as soon as i get the email. "oh boy i wonder where my package is!" warehouse.

[jem-crystairs]

releasing a song like "telephone" nowadays would be unthinkable. we need more anthems about wanting to shoot your shitass phone because it sucks and annoys you and you're too busy dancing to talk to your lame boytoy

[jem-crystairs]

Arugula is some crap they found on the ground for real

[jem-crystairs]

Devastating! Art museum gift shop doesn’t sell prints of specific and unpopular painting that struck a cord with you!

[jem-crystairs]

Just saw a video analysis about if the Scooby gang could beat Light Yagami. I wasn’t worried about the gang but I didn’t realize how cooked Light was. Velma alone is way smarter than L, Freddy would instantly see through the trapped drawer that hid the Death Note and Scooby is such a wildcard overall, who is immune to the Death Note because he isn’t human. So even if he gets the rest of the gang, Scooby is coming with a vengeance.

Funniest scenario is Shaggy and Scooby trailing Light only to be confronted by him. Light tries to kill Shaggy but can’t because he would never just give away his name as “Norville Rogers.” Light thinks Shaggy is some genius playing fourth-dimensional chess with him.

[jem-crystairs]

Every time my extended family gets together in upstate ny, we (the Adults) all get wasted & at least 1 giant Family Scandal comes out…..tonight is that night..

[jem-crystairs]

you get to cut one basic need out of your life. you can still CHOOSE to partake in them and they will feel as good and refreshing as normal, but going without will no longer affect you negatively.

[jem-crystairs]

people in books and tv shows are always getting so upset they throw an untouched meal in the trash. that would never be me. i'd receive the worst news of my life and still be like Let me put this in the fridge.