jercmiah - Tumblr blog

[jercmiah]

his frame is hidden underneath a dark green, matching sweat suit  -   irritating courtesy of his mother -   with beads of sweat melt down his visage as his arms push upward with him, running at a steady pace.    for a man who  HUFFS AND PUFFS    merely when he walks up a flight of stairs ,   it’s quite surprising he was able to quicken his pace fast enough to catch up to   melisa when he sees her with a bundle of leashes in her hand.   “ hey , mel ! ”     there’s a gloomy story behind this,  in spite of the smile on his face as he approaches her.   a feeling of dejection  ;   loneliness     that creeps into his bones so quickly   &    a tendency to cling on to the first person he sees in hopes that it heals his isolation of some sort.          ALAS ,  a gloomy story he shakes off .     “ drop the dogs off somewhere ,  let’s light up . ”     he’s aware it isn’t that easy, what it being her job and all,    but imagine it was.     “ you smoke ?   do they  smoke ? ”      

                    starter for @oceanvd​   |   mel.

[jercmiah]

incoming txt ➥ n & j

NEZ: sir ??

NEZ: in what context ??

JEREMIAH: come on man dont make it weird.

JEREMIAH: you know what? love doesn't need context.. im not going to explain myself to you

[jercmiah]

incoming txt ➥ open

LANA: ummm

LANA: idk jeremiah this is like soooooooo incriminating i'm in a Lit Ral state of shock n i'm panting into gunner's stolen inhaler to retrieve some of his horse cock nutrients

LANA: i think u DEFINTELY popped a bonie all like BOING when u saw tht image

LANA: n the audience? well? what do they think? let's find out!

LANA: [ sent a voice note: Lana, in a nasally voice, clearly pinching her nose: "Um, hieeeeee, my name's Melvin and I, like, totally agree, Jeremiah's got a bonieeeee". ]

LANA: idk abt u bt he sounded super convinced 💔 sick of all ur lies 💔

JEREMIAH: no.. keep gunner's inhaler and horse cock out of this, you monster. it's between you and me.

JEREMIAH: and spongebob and patrick.

JEREMIAH: shit, don't ask the audience. https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DB20mHjNJts/hqdefault.jpg

JEREMIAH: 😂😂😂😂

JEREMIAH: [ sent a voice note: "Oh really? Why don't you fuck right off, Melvin" ]

JEREMIAH: ur right. :( i didn't think of it that way but melvin really made some good points. send a pic of him, you know, so i can put a face to the name.

[jercmiah]

incoming txt ➥ lara!😃

LARA: OMG????

LARA: wow learning sm about u today jer bear!!!

LARA: hey i dont judge!! everyone has to get their rocks off somehow

LARA: the contents a bit surprising but i guess thats a good thing

LARA: being surprising i mean i like surprising :)

LARA: it must b hard to hear the word nickelodeon tho :/

LARA: omg did i just get u hot n bothered saying it???

LARA: my bad hope ur not in public LMFAO

JEREMIAH: come on haha

JEREMIAH: the content?

JEREMIAH: really? i mean, i got plenty more where that came from, not in a weird way though. i mean i can probably find some for you if you want me to?

JEREMIAH: ya it's a little hard. everyone's like "let's talk about nostalgic tv" and im all "no i dont want to pop one when thinking about ned's declassified."

JEREMIAH: sorry, idk that was disgusting.

JEREMIAH: good thing it wasn't the nick intro song though, amirite, i'd have to find the closest bathroom. haha 😅

JEREMIAH: fuck that was gross too.

JEREMIAH: but no, seriously, i find NORMAL things hot - not anything like that. i'm a bit of an axillism, you know.. oh and don't leave me around the eiffel tower. just normal things

[jercmiah]

incoming txt ➥ spam??

LYDIA: STOP

LYDIA: STOP

lydia: CANCEL SPONGELOVE

LYDIA: i dnt undrstnd i txt'd stop like it told me 2 bt i keep getting these studpid pics every hr ??? i even blocked the last numbrs ???

LYDIA: where is ur customer service ???

JEREMIAH: i said sorry

JEREMIAH: ohhh hahahaha

JEREMIAH: no, lol it's not a spam text

JEREMIAH: wait did you sign up for... a subscription to get texts of spongebob hooking up with patrick before?

[jercmiah]

    jess

𝐟𝐭  .     𝐣𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐚𝐡  𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐬

 “     𝐬𝐨  …    ”    she  folds  her  hands  across  her  lap  before  she  continues  to  talk  .  her  face  is  unreadable  .    “   at  this  point  ,  you  must  know  that  i  know  and  as  we  both  know  ,  i ‘ m  not  really  good  at  keeping  things  secret  …  “   she  shrugs  .  she  wouldn ‘ t  really  sell  him  out  to  the  pigs  ,  but  she  needs  a  favor  .  “    unless    …    you ‘ re  willing  to  expand  your  catalogue  ,  you  see    …    i ‘ m  not  really  a  weed  kind  of  girl  .   “ (    @jercmiah​    )

             “  jess ,    you're threatening me ?  ”         it was clear   .  frankly he was more hurt than concerned     &    had he not been certain his mothers would   (  kill him  )    if they found out all of their gifts the past few years have been bought with money given to jeremiah in return for pot ,   he would have probably continued tempting it.   “ alright ,   hit me.   i can get you some uppers ,  caps,   oxy.  nothing too crazy . ”       jokes on her -    he would have done it even without the threat.

[jercmiah]

incoming txt ➥ open

ALAÏA: bestie..what the fuck

ALAÏA: im dead. like deceased. call the mortician because I can't with the spongerick ship

ALAÏA: like not to get weird but think about that smut. I'm interested now.

ALAÏA: all i gotta say is.. so. many. holes.

JEREMIAH: spongerick hahahahhh

JEREMIAH: "not to get weird but think about spongebob and patrick sleeping together"

JEREMAIH: listen its ur classic friends to lover tale, man. shit's romantic too, personally i refuse to believe WE'RE weird for thinking about it

JEREMIAH: and ur right, the holes.

JEREMIAH: but it's more than sex i mean it's the dynamic we gotta take into account

[jercmiah]

incoming txt ➥ e & j.

elijah: hi

elijah: is the inside joke that u guys are larping as spongebob n patrick?

JEREMIAH: hey whats up

JEREMIAH: no wtf?

JEREMIAH: dude i larp as squidward, nothing more nothing less.... do i give u spongebob vibes?

[jercmiah]

incoming txt ➥ jeremiah

BEAU: that could be us but ur playin......

BEAU: https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LOtA-iMPB70/maxresdefault.jpg

JEREMIAH: hey just say the word man. you beautiful chiseled talented english god. just say the word

JEREMIAH: never took u for a brony but i dig it. yeah i can get behind it.

[jercmiah]

        cherry !

    “  hey !  ” she exclaims, giving him a gentle nudge in the arm. sure, she’s in a stressful situation but the presence of a friend in a time of need always seems to make the moment a little brighter for her, like there’s some light at the end of this tunnel. the sound of the line disconnecting on her, however, brings about a sigh. it seems like the towing company is still a ways away and that they’re sick of her worried calls. “ this car is a classic. and there’s no way i’m getting rid of her. betty’s been with me since, well, forever. sure she has some problems, but who doesn’t? she gets me from point a to point b on most days. that’s all that matters, right?  ” she knows he’s right, deep down, that it’s time to send betty off to that scrapyard in the sky, but she won’t ever be able to part with something that’s of such sentimental value to her. “ i’m not blowing her up … none of that. we can fix her up again, good as new. i know it.  ”

“ betty, eh ?   named after the legendary  BETTY WHITE  since they were both probably around in 1800 BC. ”       no ,    he will not slow down with the eldery jokes .     he will,  however,  ease up on the comments insinuating that betty was useless after cherry’s speech.  (  he gets it.  )   in fact hidden in his closet, beneath old school papers,  empty cans of diet coke and other suspicious substances,  sits an aged skateboard  ,   literally on its last leg;  one he just can’t find himself getting rid of.   “ right,  okay. fine.  let me have a look then, yeah ? ”    bad idea,  but he walks closer to the vehicle anyway,  inspecting it.    “ i think i watched enough teen dramas to know that you just pop the hood and,  i don’t know,   pull something. you called a towing company,  right ?  how far are they ? ”

[jercmiah]

incoming txt ➥ open

JEREMIAH: https://img.wattpad.com/cover/209720022-288-k372020.jpg

JEREMIAH: shit

JEREMIAH: i'm sorry

JEREMIAH: i can't even explain it really it was meant for someone else

JEREMIAH: im not into that just so u know like i dont get off on that or anything it was a joke for a friend

[jercmiah]

did someone say bring in a depressed stoner who also thinks he’s funny??? no?? oh ok.

                  Look at them, they’re just staring at me                        Like come and watch the skinny kid                      With a steadily declining mental health                       & laugh as he attempts to give you                            what he cannot give himself

                                         MEET JEREMIAH.

tw .    mental health,  depression, drugs

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[jercmiah]

✉   –   jeremiah & noah.

noah: so i watched this movie where a lot of people get really old on a beach

noah: thats the whole movie

noah: called old

jeremiah: shit man so like.. just a documentary about florida? probably a dope movie to get high to.

[jercmiah]

cherry​ .

open to  :  all  / @irvingstarters​ location  :  idk on the side of some road somewhere 

     all seemed well that morning as she decided to head out to the beach to enjoy a rare saturday off. her parents didn’t need help at the store and obviously there was no teaching to be done on a saturday, so she was free as a bird. that is, until her beloved vintage punchbuggy did that oh so endearing thing it tends to do where the engine starts to sputter and soon after completely halts, smoke flying out the exhaust in a way that’s all too alarming. it’s been fixed before, and she knows it likely can be again, but it’s always only a temporary patch for a car that should’ve been let go of long ago. only she’s too attached to get rid of it, the car being the first major purchase she ever made with her own hard-earned cash. she’s on hold with the towing company when another car approaches, pulling over just behind her. “it’s okay !  ”  cherry insists,  “ it just looks a lot worse than it actually is. but i’ve got it all under control.  ”  does she though. 

ah ,   that yellow broken down car on the side of the road could only belong to one person.  cherry.       quite possibly one of the kindest people he knows,   in fact her cheerful energy could almost immediately bring a smile to jeremiah’s face.   no matter how low he was feeling prior.      hence why he didn’t hesitate to pull up behind her,   his lips turned upward into a grin as he parks his   - okay, his mom’s -    2018 subaru impreza behind the volkswagen beetle.     “ cherry, tsk  ”     he says,   attempting to make his timbre sound filled with evident disappointment but it quickly fading when a chuckle falls out,    “ i don’t mean to laugh. ”    which is always the respectful thing to say   right after    you laugh.    “ it’s a horse and buggy almost,  a   serious danger   to society.   it’s about time for you to move on, huh ?    hey ,  listen,       we’ll give ‘er a proper send-off.  fucking blow it up     or sink it      or  -   i don’t know  -  you wanna funeral ?  ”     by now he’s by cherry’s side,   a hand reaching out to pat her back.     “ we can give ‘er a funeral. ”

[jercmiah]

@cvastals​   |  lara williams .  |  kahlo’s cafe .

his tongue is poked out slightly,   using the organ to test the temperature of his coffee before growing a pair hefty enough to actually take a sip.  although that pair shrank when his blue hues glanced upward to see lara walk into the cafe.        “ lara ,  hey ! ”    it was immediate, a habitual greeting that he forced out for fear that he would, instead, say nothing.  barely giving the girl time to fully walk in.        and yet,   so far so good;   there was no quiver in his voice like usual when he first approaches her.  he stands from where he was sat,  abandoning all of his belongings - laptop, cell phone, shitty anime drawings and all - at the table.   “ i wanted to ask you something, . ”      he starts, before even getting close to her .       “ so like a year ago i - well, i don’t know if you remember, but i went to splash zone and i think -  it was last year -   i think i left my sunglasses somewhere near the slide you work at ?  i was wondering if maybe you’ve seen them ? ”       he wouldn’t define the conversation starter as a lie,  by the way, especially because he had lost a pair of sunglasses at splash zone when he was a kid.   instead,  an excuse.    “ they’re not that important, well, they were my grandad’s but he’s got alzheimer’s so it’s not like he’ll remember. ”    a pause,  an awkward grin forming across his lips.  “ i’m kidding !    about the alzheimer’s,  he doesn’t -  anyway, how are you ?  ”

[jercmiah]

   @cvastals​​   /  frankie noel.

           ah ,  fannie’s !      he wouldn’t necessarily consider the place his STOMPING GROUNDS   -  what with it not being his place to stomp, but he would certainly consider it his happy place .   in fact when he’s in immediate need of an endorphin release,   fannie’s is his go-to.   perhaps much to frankie’s dismay as it usually ends up with jeremiah drunkenly banging at his bedroom door.   but not today .    while , yes ,  he still finds himself banging on his friend’s bedroom door , it’s not because he’s drunk .   it’s because it’s past 2pm.    “ frank, ”    his timbre is light, whispering, despite the loud sounds that emit when his knuckles make contact with the door between them.    “ get up, man !    i can’t drink without you, it’ll just look pathetic. ”

[jercmiah]

text ➟

Lily: who the fUCK DECIDED 6AM WAS A GOOD TIME TO BLAST MUSIC

Lily: whoever it was, i hope you fall of a bridge and learn to use fuCKING HEADPHONES

Lily: thank you for coming to my ted talk

JEREMIAH: no but you gotta consider right..

JEREMIAH: was it good music at least? like... maybe add it to my playlist good?

JEREMIAH: that looked incriminating... i swear it wasn't me