jeremiethrough

[jeremiethrough]

hi,

in the past few days, i feel like i’m not on track anymore. after everything in school, what’s next? i’ve been thinking a lot about this because i don’t have a sense of goal anymore. should i take the RMP boards or enroll in a bootcamp to learn data science? i don’t know what to do. i love my job and where i am because i always meet different people from various regions for site visits, but there’s always a void in me and i don’t know what will fill it.

maybe it’s about earning more? it’s really hard to save here in the philippines. yet, i’m still very thankful because i see my family weekly and do church stuff, which is fulfilling.

anyway, i have time to write this because i’m already done with my work and have nothing else to do at the moment. tonight is miss universe PH coronation night! are you excited to see who will win?

back to my thoughts, i don’t know what i’m feeling right now. maybe the answer is having someone in my life again to add some thrill? i really want that, just like with LBB. i miss that person. i wish them well. deep down, they have a special place in my heart. hoping to see them again this year.

i’ll stop here for now. i’ll be back.

[jeremiethrough]

naging school idol ka na ba for someone?

Siguro. For being top always in class haha

[jeremiethrough]

the first few months of this year were really tough for me. back in college, i didn't really face much failure, but the working world has been a whole different ball game. i ended up leaving my first job not because of the work itself, but because of the toxic people i had to deal with. it just wasn't the right environment, so i decided to move on. i had a gut feeling there had to be something better out there for me.

it took me two long months to land a new job, but it was totally worth the wait because i'm in a much better place now! thank you, God! while i was in between jobs, i spent a lot of time with my family and got involved in ministry work. i really needed that break after all the stress and exhaustion from my previous job. working the graveyard shift just wasn't my thing.

now, i'm having a blast in BGC, Taguig city. i absolutely love the vibe and atmosphere here, even though the cost of living is pretty steep. but hey, i'm living my dreams! i also enjoy traveling to different places for site visits. apologies for being mia over the last few months, but i'm back on my feet now. let's dive back into having fun!

[jeremiethrough]

my last memory with you is the bus station. in the quiet hum of the bus, our fingers intertwined, creating a delicate dance of connection. Time seemed to pause as the world blurred, leaving only the warmth of our touch and the unspoken intimacy that echoed through the shared silence.

[jeremiethrough]

[jeremiethrough]

@rbhvleo // roberto ferri // mothering by ainslie hogarth // rainer maria rilke // ? // planet of love by richard siken // a self portrait in letters by anne sexton // indian summer by ron hicks

[jeremiethrough]

After 5 days of sick leave. Here we go again.

Hello December!

[jeremiethrough]

i'm worn out

my doctor has advised me to take sick leave till December 2, therefore I'm on it now. I'm not this person. I'm not weak; in fact, I'm too energetic to handle things, but this time, I feel like I'm about to give up. My work environment is extremely demanding and taxing, and I believe that my TL is underappreciating of all of my efforts. Despite my best efforts, I received a 2.72/5 on my third-month evaluation from him. Still my sister encouraged me to keep trying and to give it my all. My family gives me constant solace.

my hectic schedule has probably contributed to my recent weakness because I work graveyard shift and must go to several errands like as Manila, QC, and Subic in order to complete important tasks. Although enjoyable, yet my body is tiring.

i also miss going to my usuals from my time in Laguna. My family and friends are missed. I miss home. I don't feel at ease.

as for me, these are some of my best pictures. i may appear to be doing well to you all, but I'm not. Send hugs.

[jeremiethrough]

Gusto ko na mag-samgyup. Wala ako maaya.

[jeremiethrough]

Omsim 😂

Kapag off, di na dapat lumalabas ng apartment. Magastos.

[jeremiethrough]

Kamusta araw mooooo

Fine. I’m travelling tomorrow.

[jeremiethrough]

Sana sa susunod na pagpunta ko sa baguio, sa tamang tao naman. 🙏

[jeremiethrough]

whatever was left, that was ours for a while.

sunrise - louise glück

[jeremiethrough]

💯

““We all must learn to be happy with being alone; that is when things begin to change.” - Tyler Joseph”

—

[jeremiethrough]

I'd say I'm in the midst of moving phase. Teardrops of sadness and joy were so usual for me nowadays- in my apartment, at work (which I usually have to learn on my own), eating, and having fun on my own. I'm in a phase where I go to the supermarket alone, eat alone, go to laundry alone, and buy everything I want by myself. Lonely yet flourishing.

Being an engineer in my field is a huge accomplishment for me. Most of the time, I need to be smart and knowledgeable, which is thrilling. More to the point where my co-engineers really have a kind of life where they go to the bar (which I refer to them as bar boys and bar girls cuz they were from i think an elite class). I’m having fun here tho and most of the time I’m going with them.

Again, i’m moving forward towards growth but I miss you.

[jeremiethrough]

i miss you

[jeremiethrough]

Self improvement is great but ultimately? you have to accept your self. Yes you can eat better, exercise more, read more, set boundaries, love your self, but it all comes down to this. Some days you won’t have the energy to do any of these things. And you’ll look in the mirror and think that this is not enough. That’s a lie. The biggest love for self is to live slowly. To rest. To really rest. Have a nap. Eat what makes you feel good. Read if you want to. Embrace yourself and accept that you cannot and will not be ever be perfect. Accept that you are good enough. You don’t need to keep busy all the time. you don’t need to go out all the time and post on instagram. You don’t need to journal if you don’t want to. You don’t need to make art if you don’t want to. Breathe, give yourself grace and compassion. Give yourself the love and tenderness you so badly need. Be gentle with yourself. You are trying and it is good enough. You are good enough.