jessiebee721

[jessiebee721]

@tomgauld

[jessiebee721]

Alphabet Soup

Time – 8:26 I’m having the kind of day where your first thought when you’re running up up up the stairs from the subway,           balancing your purse,

                    your work id,                             the book you didn’t have time to shove back inside your purse,                                    and a bag of bananas, oranges and strawberries

 between your only two hands.

Chanting in your head ‘go and pee and tie your shoe, go and pee and tie your shoe, goandpeeandtieyourshoe’

while dodging hand trucks            and construction cones                     and dog presents along the sidewalk.

Braving the swarms of locusts and lawyers in the lobby,

tap dancing a little exercise as you unlock the office remembered from a time before you even knew doors of glass could lock. ‘Goandpeeandtieyourshoe.’

 Time 8:32 - Running through the halls, making note of the dust bunnies peeking out from behind the recycling bins,

                       Throwing fruit at a table in the rush to turn on my laptop and plug in in in

                                        Book, Jacket, Purse all stacked in the corner of my desk,                                                     Sign in and load the missed connections (37 since 4pm Friday)

Circle back for the fruit – because no man gets left behind, and it cannot be said that presentation doesn’t count.

           Dump the oranges,                       Lay the bananas,                            Wash the berries in their own smaller bowl,

Empty the dishwasher, Fill the dishwasher, Empty the coffeepot, Fill the coffeepot. ‘Goandpeeandtieyourshoe.’

 Time 8:41 - Back to homebase now,                              plugged in to prioritize,                                            attuned to the time sensitive “I’m WFH. Someone is Starting today. I can’t remote in.”

Run to the back, press the power, run to the front, update on the situation.

                  “Still can’t access”.

 Time 8:46 - Run to the back,                         soft system reset,                                   wait for the loading loading loading,                                             stare at the bluescreen.

“How do I fix this?” “Give me the code, I’ll give you the key.”

 Time 8:50 – 36 digit code copied down and retyped at home base.                        Pending Key.

Be productive. Check the emails mark the pco’s log the sketches file the rfi’s find the submittal answer. Alphabet Soup.

 Time 8:53 – Face the lock.                     “See attached Key.”                            Quickprint. Grab out of copier on way to the back again.                            (Make note that B&W still charging as if color. Follow up later.)

Insert the key.          Wait for the downloads uploads restart login homescreen. “Done. TY.”. ‘Goandpeeandtieyourshoe’

 Time 9:09 – Almost done prioritizing the emails. Almost caught up. . . .                  “I just don’t think it looks good if the lobby is empty on someone’s first day” . . . To the lobby I go…. ‘Goandpeeandtieyourshoe’

 Time 9:32 – “Sorry the 456, the NQRW, the MTA”                      A different kind of Alphabet Soup.                      “No Big deal – I just have to get back to my ~”“The new girl’s in the lobby, we never added her to the system. I’ll go get her now you stay here.                                                  T                     Thanksyou’rethebest.” … ‘Goandpeeandtieyourshoe’

 Time 9:40 – Shake hands, smile, joke about forgetting to add her to security –                       even though half an hour ago you didn’t even know there was someone to potentially add.                                 Wait up front through the tour.                                     The slow laps around the office you can see through the hall. Wait. Check the emails you can’t address until you’re back at homebase. ‘Goandpeeandtieyourshoe’

 Time 9:48 – “Thanksyou’rethebest”. “No problem.”                         Back to homebase to address the most pressing of the little red flags,                                      the red exclamation marks in the margins,                                              the red red red. ‘Goandpeeandtieyourshoe’

 Time 9:52 – Go pee. Tie your shoe.

v}�w��

[jessiebee721]

i hate you. i hate you for what you did and what i wake up to every night im not high or drunk or utterly exhausted before i pass out. i hate everything that happened. and im probably going to see you this break. you ruin everything. you made me dirty and tired and just so upset about everything…

[jessiebee721]

i cant keep doing this, looking back at this past week, in 5 nights i’ve gotten less than 12 hours of sleep. and im confused and lonely and bored and just plain tired. the cops were in my room earlier, and i feel so bad about what happened but i cant help but feel paranoid, they are gonna meet…

[jessiebee721]

this awkward quiet before i get tired, when all the lights are out, and my roommates asleep or not even here. because this is the time when i cave in, and tune into your thoughts displayed for the world to see on my computer screen. and i read about how i’m ruining your life, and how its all my…

[jessiebee721]

Tiny Vessels

Never has a song been more relevant to how i feel. Thanks for the hurt, the flipping this on me, and letting me be alone. If i saw you now i don’t even know what i’d do. I feel dirty and used. And I was beautiful, but I don’t mean a thing to you.

[jessiebee721]

Original Piece - "Shissou"

I wish I could just claim to be

Bankrupt of all originality.

And then you would need to see

There's nothing left behind of me.

For all the songs left to sing

I never finish anythin-

[jessiebee721]

Original Piece - "Tiny Vessels"

Where was I the moment you knew,

That what we could've had was through?

Wasn't I even worth a call,

Or, hell, a message on my wall?

Don't I deserve that much from you,

After all that we almost went through?

Memories were made and time was spent,

I gave you what you wanted till it felt like i was bent.

So now what was almost we, is just you and me,

And all we went through, is over 'cause of you.

[jessiebee721]

Original Piece - "Sketchnote"

Sak Passe. Epps, Mah Boulle.

Thinkin back now, man i wish i coulda stayed.

On top of my game in the 845,

Spent all our days cruzin down rt. 59.

Flashin back to June, chillin on the risers,

Standin shoulder to shoulder with all the other Tigers.

16 and me in a sea of 250,

Give anything to go back cause I know they all miss me.

Put in so much time makin' sure to Rock the Land,

721 c'mon give us all a hand.

People comin' up askin if my momma's Tirro,

Greatest feeling ever 'cause she's kinda like my hero.

Even on vacation, when i'm headin' off to Cali',

Man there ain't nothing like Spring in the Valley.

Home. Damn I miss home. Ain't been the same since I left you.

Home. Damn I miss home. Ain't been the same since I left you.

[jessiebee721]

Hip-Hop Reader #5 : Kiese Laymon - hip hop stole my black boy

A cipher, in regards to hip hop, is a freestyle rap battle. This word also holds meaning in regard to other aspects of society, but it is believed to attach its meaning to rap battles from the fact that it is another way to say zero. The author seems to grow throughout the piece as his understanding of the word cipher evolves. In his flashbacks to his childhood, you see that he doesn't really have a concrete understanding of the word, using it as a synonym along with his friends, but as he grows up and begins to question what it actually means and what impact it has had on him growing up, he develops almost his own meaning of the word.

[jessiebee721]

Hip-Hop Reader #4 : Bell hooks - gangsta culture

The typical man of the house is responsible for providing for the entire family, having a job and taking care of financial needs. This idea fits into the gangsta culture's portrayal of men perfectly. They all get money by either rapping or selling drugs or some other kind of illegal activity that provides for their family and glorifies them as well. Part of gangsta culture is not having to answer to the white man, and when gangstas work under the radar, they're not answering to anybody. This embodies their ideas in the most self destructive ways possible, by sinking down the social ladder, how can they expect to have power in a public sphere if everything they're doing to make money needs to be kept private?

[jessiebee721]

Hip-Hop Reader #3 : Imani perry - the venus hip-hop and the pink ghetto

The Black and Latino women featured in all hip-hop and music videos today are commodified, meaning they lose their identities as human beings and are considered mere objects for the men in the videos. By disassociating women from a person as a whole, they are instead presented as desirable body parts to be wanted after. The presentation of women as scantily clad reduces the impact of anything they say. When all they are wanted for is their bodies, their thoughts have no importance in the industry and they are considered less than human.

[jessiebee721]

Hip-Hop Reader #2 : Michel Marriott : Rap’s embrace of ‘Nigger’ fires bitter debate

KRS-One's opinion of rap's influence on the word nigger is that through repeated use and application of the word to almost every situation, the meaning of the word will change. He believes that if the word is desensitized through rap music, all negative connotations pertaining to race will disappear and the word will show up as just another negative word to be used on everybody.

Reverend Benjamin F. Chavis Jr. believes that there is no way to change that word. It "dehumanized" the black people of the past and there is no way to change that, and should be no desire to use such an ugly word. There should be no way to forget what that word meant, because then it lessens the impact of the word.

Both of these views are literally the opposite of one another, one wanting to desensitize and rewrite the meaning of the word, and the other refusing to let the past be forgotten. There is no way to rewrite a word and make it racially independent and remember how it was used back in the day specifically against a certain race.

[jessiebee721]

Hip-Hop Reader #1 : Sasha Frere-Jones - Ghost's World

The author feels that Ghostface's lyrics are different than the lyrics of typical rap artists today partially because they are able to fit in a lot of words into a small period of time. Ghostface is able to stay true to Wu Tang's style as well as incorporate more of his own individuality. Wu Tang's lyrics are typically made up of a lot of hidden meanings through both words and sounds, so that you are required to look deeply to understand the song. Ghostface does that but he also lets his lyrics go between being candid autobiographical vignettes and non sequiters. His lyrics manage to sound raw and unrehearsed, but the songs are never rushed or sloppy. Ghostface is able to blend together everything that makes a good, gritty rap album without sounding over commercialized in the opinion of the author.

[jessiebee721]

Critique #7 (2010's) "Lupe Fiasco & Skylar Grey" - Words I Never Said

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7pT66VLxggM

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I really think the war on terror is a bunch of bullshit Just a poor excuse for you to use up all your bullets How much money does it take to really make a full clip 9/11 building seven did they really pull it?

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This song was the second single released from Lupe's long anticipated album, Lasers, and is exactly what you've come to expect from Lupe, filled with conspiracy theories and social injustices pointed out for everyone to see. In this short verse alone, he talks about the war on terrorism, the government pocketing money, 911 and building 7 being possibly done by the government as well. It is believed that Lupe should get in trouble for throwing so much dirt around, and that made it hard for record labels to want to sign him, but the payout has been worth the risk, as Lasers sold 200,000 copies the first week of release.

This verse in particular sums up Lupe's feelings and what makes him such a controversy. The stanza has an AAAA rhyming style, the next stanza all rhymes together in the same way as well. This song is considered to also be a statement against his record company, who it is believed forced him to change alot of lasers against what he wanted to do.

[jessiebee721]

Critique #6 (2000's) "The Game & 50 Cent" - Hate It Or Love It

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tb0Zmn7ikwo

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Waitin on Sha Money to land sittin in the Range Thinkin how they spend 30 million dollars on airplanes When there's kids starvin Pac is gone and Brendas still throwin babies in the garbage I wanna know what's goin on like i hear Marvin No school books they use that wood to build coffins Whenever I'm in the booth and i get exhausted I think what if Marie Banker got that abortion I love ya Ma'

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Hate It Or Love It was released from The Game's debut album The Documentary on March 15, 2005. This piece was a collaboration between The Game & 50 Cent in every step of the process, and was actually considered to be released on 50's next album instead since he put so much work into it. Other people who put a lot into this single were Cool&Dre, Dr. Dre himself and B.G. Knocc Out. Everyone involved felt this would be a big hit the first time thye heard it, and insisted to the company it be released as a single, and it was the third single released from The Documentary. This piece is considered by most to be The Game's greatest hit.

This song talks about the pain and struggles faced by both The Game and 50 growing up "on the streets", as well as the inequality in the world today. Both rappers talk about how they used to face many illegal choices growing up and how far they have come. The first line of the piece literally says "Growin up i was confused", and it could be talking about anybody who grew up without luxury. In the last verse, which was actually the first thing The Game wrote for this song, he questions how people can spend money on planes when there are children starving, and earlier in the song says that the wood used to make children's school books is instead being used to make coffins, addressing the inequality in the eyes of priorities of the government.

The rhyme structure of this piece is AA-BBB-CCC-D, using mostly slant rhymes. The last line, since it doesn't rhyme with the rest of the piece at all, would usually be critiqued but since it goes thematically with the line before it, and it's literally him telling his mother that he loves her, that line fits into the piece. The chorus is sung by 50, and is popularly remixed by Mary J B.

[jessiebee721]

Critique #5 (1990's) "Puff Daddy, Faith Evans & 112" - I'll Be Missing You

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWuBS1HmI3M

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Seems like yesterday we used to rock the show I laced the track, you locked the flow So far from hangin on the block for dough Notorious, they got to know that Life ain't always what it seem to be (uh-uh) Words can't express what you mean to me Even though you're gone, we still a team Through your family, I'll fulfill your dream (that's right) In the future, can't wait to see If you open up the gates for me

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March 9, 1997 Notorious B.I.G., prominent rapper and close friend of Puff Daddy, was murdered. As a response to that, Puff Daddy released I'll Be Missing You on May 27, 1997, less than three months later. This song topped charts in 7 different nations, and was the only rap song to debut at #1 on Billboard 100 until Eminem's Not Afraid in 2010. I'll Be Missing You sampled The Police's Every Breath You Take in the chorus sung by Faith Evans and used the beat from the African spiritual I'll Fly Away.

The lyrics are clearly in response to the death of Puff's close friend, Notorious. Notorious is mentioned by name throughout the song, including in the fourth line above. The song reflects both on past memories and how things have changed in the present due to Notorious' untimely death. The rhyme scheme is slightly a-typical, in an AAA-B-CC-DD-EE form, however the strategical meshing of lines and not breathing at the end of the "B" keeps the flow going. This song, 14 years later, is still heard all of the time in response to the passing of loved ones, the words are timeless and this piece will most likely be known for many years to come.