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jiminomenon · 2 months ago

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congrats on 800 btw 😍💙💙💙

۶ৎ A DREAM WITH A BASEBALL PLAYER — yu jimin.

⌗ in which— karina’s a shy, socially awkward girl with a huge crush on you, the campus's popular baseball player. she’s never had a real conversation with you, but with all her embarrassing attempts to get your attention, she can’t help but wonder—how did she fall for someone who doesn’t even know she exists?

pairings. loser!college student!karina x gp!baseball(softball? baseball for the plot)player!reader

warning(s). 18+ (smut), loser!karina...shes like really down bad (anon dis is 4 u), minor injury (karina gets hit with a baseball, but she’s fine!), secondhand embarrassment, mutual pinning (kinda? ur nonchalant), drunk sex/drunk reader ☹️, dry humping, pet names (pretty girl & baby), finishing inside bc why not, and let me know if there's more!

word count. 7.7k

authors note. happy 800 chat

karina had seen you around campus, of course. how could she not? you were everywhere—on posters for your team, casually chatting with her inner circle of friends, and always looking good doing it.

she was a senior in college and had a lot on her mind, but somehow your name had a tendency to float into her mind more often than she wanted to admit. and not because she thought you were a great baseball player but because… well, she might have had a little crush on you.

she’d tried to ignore it at first—tried to focus on her own life, her studies, and the fact that graduation was creeping up on her faster than she’d liked. but every time she saw you on campus, every time her eyes accidentally locked with yours during a class, her heart would skip. it was like a punch to her gut, and she hated how giddy it made her feel.

at first, she tried to chalk it up to being starstruck, to the fact that you were the school's top baseball player, one of the best, and everyone knew who you were. it wasn’t anything serious, she told herself. just a passing fancy. but that didn’t stop her thoughts from wandering back to you when she should’ve been doing something else. she’d catch herself imagining what it would be like to casually run into you, maybe sit next to you at a coffee shop, or even get invited to one of your games.

you would have conversations inside her head. ones that would last for hours as she imagined all the different things you two would talk about. sometimes they were deep and thoughtful; other times they were silly and fun, and sometimes you would say things to her that made her heart pound and her cheeks flush.

she tried to brush it off, to tell herself it was silly—you probably didn’t even know she existed. you probably didn’t even think twice about the random girl who always seemed to be watching from a distance.

but one day, everything changed.

you’re late—shocker, right? it’s always the same story: running from class to practice, your mind racing with plays and strategies, your feet pounding the pavement of campus. it’s the first day of the semester, and you're already behind.

of course, as if on cue, someone steps right into your path.

you crash straight into her, your shoulder knocking hers as you both stumble. her books tumble to the ground in a flurry of papers, and you mutter an apology as you bend down to help her gather them.

it takes you a moment to realize who she is.

her dark hair falls in waves around her face, obscuring her features as she frantically grabs at her scattered belongings. you can tell she's frustrated, but you don't really understand why until your eyes fall on the cover of the book you'd picked up—it's a college textbook, one for a class that you just so happen to be enrolled in.

which was also kicking your ass.

she freezes as your eyes meet. you recognize her instantly—she sits near you in class. she's quiet but always seems to pay attention, taking notes with pen and paper instead of typing away on a laptop like everyone else. she also stares at you sometimes—or, at least, you think she does. sometimes it feels like you're being watched, and when you look back, you catch her quickly glancing away.

“uh, sorry about that,” you say, your voice a little more tense than usual as you hand her the book.

she seems to snap out of her trance and takes the book from your hand, still blushing slightly. “it’s… it’s fine. really.”

a moment of silence passes between you two as you both stand there awkwardly, neither sure what to do next. then, you start walking away, but just before you turn the corner, you look back, and there she is again—staring at you, her eyes wide and startled, like a deer caught in the headlights. you raise an eyebrow before continuing on your way.

after that day, karina can’t stop thinking about that moment. she knows her friends are starting to catch on to her little obsession. they’ve all seen how she gets when your name comes up in conversation.

at first, giselle was the only one who seemed to notice. she’d raised an eyebrow when karina mentioned you, casually saying, “oh, so the baseball girl, huh? the one you keep staring at from across the room?”

karina had brushed it off, but giselle’s knowing smile lingered. “it’s so obvious, rina. you’ve got it bad.”

karina had laughed nervously, refusing to admit it out loud. “i don’t have it bad. i just—she’s cute, that’s all.”

giselle just grinned wider, not buying it for a second.

then there was winter, who was the more analytical one.

karina knew it wouldn't take her long to notice something was up, so she did her best to keep her feelings to herself. but that proved to be impossible, and when winter had quietly said, “you know, you always seem to gravitate towards the baseball field when we’re deciding where to study outside.” karina knew she was doomed.

she was blushing so much that even she noticed. she stammered a little, trying to explain, but winter just laughed and gave her a knowing look. she patted karina's arm reassuringly. "it's fine," she assured her. "we all have crushes sometimes, even me."

karina shook her head and muttered something about not knowing what she was talking about. winter gave her another sympathetic glance and didn’t press the issue further.

the final nail in the coffin was when ningning, bless her heart, bluntly asked, “are you, like, in love with that baseball player?”

karina had nearly choked on her coffee. “what? no! of course not!”

but ningning just shrugged, unfazed. “okay, just wondering. you talk about her a lot.”

so, yeah, her friends knew. and they weren’t exactly subtle about teasing her. but despite their teasing, karina couldn’t shake the feeling that she was completely invisible to you.

until the jersey incident.

it was a saturday morning, and karina was rummaging through her closet, trying to find something comfortable to wear to the library. finals were looming, and she was determined to spend the entire day buried in books. she grabbed the first thing that felt soft and oversized, a faded jersey she’d found at a thrift store, and threw it on without even bothering to look at the name on the back.

she met winter at the library, and as soon as she sat down, winter’s eyes widened, and she burst out laughing. “oh my god, rina, you’re not serious, right?”

karina frowned, confused. “what are you talking about?”

winter pointed at her back. “turn around and look at the mirror.”

karina reluctantly got up and walked over to the nearby restroom. she caught sight of her reflection, and her jaw dropped. emblazoned across the back of the jersey, in bold letters, was your last name.

her face burned as she realized what had happened. she’d been so oblivious that she’d accidentally worn your jersey to the library. again! not just any jersey—one with your name plastered on the back!

she didn’t even know that it was yours.

“i can’t believe this is happening,” she muttered to herself, mortified. she briefly considered taking it off and braving the cold, but she had nothing else to wear, and she really needed to study. so, with a sigh of resignation, she returned to her table, trying to ignore winter’s amused grin.

the entire day was a blur of anxiety. every time someone walked past her, she felt like they were staring at her, judging her for wearing your jersey without even knowing it belonged to you. she kept her head down, trying to focus on her books, but her mind was racing with thoughts of you seeing her and thinking she was some kind of obsessive fan.

then, as if summoned by her own paranoia, you walked into the library.

karina’s heart skipped a beat. she tried to shrink into her chair, hoping you wouldn’t notice her, but it was too late. you’d already spotted her, and a look of surprise crossed your face. she gulped nervously and averted her eyes, desperately praying you wouldn’t recognize your own jersey. but no such luck—you were already walking towards her.

your face split into a grin.

"hey," you said, coming to stand beside her, “nice jersey.”

karina’s cheeks flushed red. “oh, uh, thanks,” she stammered, avoiding eye contact. “it’s just… comfortable.”

you chuckled, and karina wanted to disappear into the floor. “yeah, i can see that. i didn’t know you were a fan.”

“i’m… not really,” she mumbled. “i just found it at a thrift store, and i didn’t even realize it was yours until today. i’m so sorry.”

you grinned, and karina couldn’t help but notice how cute you looked when you smiled. “no worries,” you said. “it’s actually kind of funny.”

you lingered for a moment longer, and karina was sure you were about to say something else, but then your friend called your name, and you turned away, waving goodbye. “see ya around.”

as you walked away, karina’s heart pounded in her chest. you thought she was a fan. and you had smiled at her. it was a small interaction, but it was enough to make her float for the rest of the day.

the next encounter was even more embarrassing.

you were working with giselle on a project, and for some reason, giselle’s apartment had become the designated workspace for your group. karina, not even getting the slightest heads-up about that you'd be coming, had walked into their shared living room, ready for a casual movie night, wearing that same jersey again.

you were sitting in front of the couch, your legs crisscrossed applesauce in front of you, your head bent over a laptop, and your brow furrowed in concentration. you looked up when you heard the door open, and when you saw her standing there in her oversized jersey and fuzzy slippers, you glanced over at giselle, raising an eyebrow.

karina froze, her mind blank with panic. she hadn’t expected to see you here, especially not again so soon after the first time. she stood awkwardly by the door, trying to think of what to do next, but it was too late—you had already spotted her, and there was no way to get out of this without seeming like an absolute weirdo.

you stared at her for a long moment before recognition flashed across your face.

"oh! karina, right?" you said, a very small, almost teasing smile forming on your lips.

she nodded slowly, feeling the blush rising on her cheeks.

karina’s eyes darted between you and giselle, a silent plea for escape radiating from her. "uh, hey," she stammered, her voice barely audible. "i… i didn't know you guys were here. i was just, uh, gonna watch a movie." she gestured vaguely towards the tv, a pathetic attempt to salvage the situation.

giselle glanced at the screen and then back at her. she was obviously fighting the urge to laugh, but karina appreciated it nonetheless. "yeah," she said, giving her an amused look, "we're working on a group project here, if that's okay with you. or, well, i guess y/n is, technically. i'm just sitting here and making sure she doesn't fall asleep."

you rolled your eyes at that, but karina could tell from your tone that it was all in good fun. she'd heard you bicker like this before—in class, between practices. giselle always teased you, but it seemed to go both ways. you always seemed to give as good as you got.

you shrugged. "yeah, it's okay with me." you turned back to karina. "you can watch your movie here if you want. i don't mind."

karina hesitated, unsure what to do next. it would be weird to say no, but she was still a little flustered by the fact that she'd worn your jersey two times in a row. and now she was about to be forced to watch a movie in the same room as you while wearing that very same jersey. it felt like her whole world had been turned upside down in just a few days, and she wasn't quite sure how to deal with it all.

but you just smiled, gesturing towards the empty seat next to you on the couch.

karina slowly made her way over and sat down beside you, trying not to look as nervous as she felt. she felt incredibly self-conscious in that moment. the rest of the evening was a blur of awkward small talk and forced smiles. karina tried to focus on the movie, but her mind kept wandering back to you. she was painfully aware of your every move, of the way you chewed on your pen when you were thinking, of the way your eyes crinkled when you laughed.

she couldn’t help but wonder what you thought of her. did you think she was trying to get your attention? did you even care? or were you just being polite? she could barely concentrate on the movie, her mind racing with questions and fears.

okay. maybe the last encounter wasn’t that embarrassing. maybe. because even if it was awkward, you seemed to be fine with her.

karina wasn’t supposed to be here. ningning had practically dragged her to your baseball practice, saying something about her "lack of fun activities" and that she needed to get out of the house on a nice, sunny saturday afternoon. but then, just before they left, ningning had whispered with a mischievous grin, "and so you can make a move on y/n." karina's face instantly went hot, and she knew—she knew—that ningning was up to no good.

it's not that she didn't want to ask you out or that she hadn't considered it before, but the thought of doing it in front of an audience was mortifying. what if you said no? or what if you said yes but only because everyone was watching? what if she said something stupid or made a complete fool of herself? she wasn’t ready, so instead, she decided to stay quiet and avoid making a scene.

she knew that it probably wasn't a good idea to come to your practice after all the embarrassing encounters you had shared; she was probably actually starting to seem like an obsessed fan, but there she was, watching you pitch in the field, sweaty and focused, your hair falling in your face as you wind up, the ball leaving your hand at just the right moment and hitting the center of the catcher's mitt with a loud "thwack" as it came crashing down.

"go talk to her," ningning whispered again, practically bouncing beside her.

karina shot her a panicked look. "no way. i’m not—"

before she could finish, you made eye contact with her. karina froze. she gave a stiff wave, offering a nervous smile, but when you didn’t approach her, she quickly looked away, fidgeting with the strap of her bag. she was hoping you would approach her first. or that you would be so distracted by practice that you wouldn’t notice her. or that maybe—just maybe—she was being paranoid and you wouldn’t think twice about it.

ningning was still pushing her forward, and she knew that there was no way she was getting out of this. but as she watched you run and swing and laugh with your friends, she knew it was only a matter of time until you saw her. she could feel it in the pit of her stomach—like a storm brewing, an electric charge building.

your eyes locked once again, and her stomach did a somersault. this was it. she couldn't hide any longer.

she took a deep breath and gathered her courage. she was going to have to make a move, no matter how humiliating it might be. she wasn’t sure where this boldness came from, but she took a deep breath and strode forward. she didn’t stop walking until she reached your side. you gave her a questioning look, obviously surprised by her sudden approach, but karina wasn't about to let herself be intimidated.

"hey, i, uh," she stuttered, trying to keep her voice steady. "i wanted to say, um, and, well… did you want a water?"

that wasn’t exactly the question she was planning on asking, but the words were out of her mouth before she could stop herself. she cursed silently. why did she always end up sounding like an idiot around you?

you blinked. “i’m good, karina.”

that was all you gave her before tossing the ball to one of your teammates.

she deflated slightly, trying to hide it behind a forced grin, nodding. her cheeks felt like fire. she turned away, but just as she started walking, she heard you call, "actually, wait! uh, could you pass me some water?"

"yeah, sure!" karina spun back around, nearly tripping over her own feet.

you held out a hand, and she placed the bottle into it, careful not to touch you. she didn't want to make things more awkward than they already were.

"thanks," you smiled, taking a sip.

karina nodded again, feeling a little bit ridiculous. was she imagining it, or were you blushing too?

you cleared your throat awkwardly. "so, are you coming to the game this weekend? it's the final."

"oh, yeah." she perked up at the mention of your game, eager to continue the conversation, and you visibly relaxed. "we're all gonna be cheering you on."

your lips curved into a smile. "that's cool. i could use the support."

karina grinned back. "we wouldn't miss it for the world."

you laughed. "good to know."

the two of you stood in silence for a moment before karina spoke up again, her nerves returning. "well, um, i'll see you at the game, y/n."

"see ya," you replied, giving her a small wave.

she turned and hurried back to her spot, her heart pounding against her ribs. had that been enough? was it too much? had you noticed the way her hands trembled or the fact that she was sweating despite the cool breeze? did you know that she couldn’t stop thinking about you, even though you barely knew each other?

she tried to shake off the doubts, but it was hard not to feel a little embarrassed. she had been so desperate to talk to you that she'd ended up sounding like a total dork. she was sure you were probably laughing about it now, telling your friends what a weirdo she was.

but before she could dwell on it too much, the sharp crack of a bat meeting a ball rang out across the field.

karina barely had time to register the sound before something hard smacked straight into her shoulder. she gasped in pain, instinctively clutching the spot where the baseball had made contact. she yelped, stumbling backward as pain bloomed across her arm. "ow—what the—"

ningning gasped dramatically. "oh my god, karina!"

you spun around at the commotion, eyes widening when you saw her clutching her shoulder. "shit—are you okay?"

karina barely had time to respond before you jogged over, concern etched across your face. she felt her heart slam against her ribs. great. not only had she embarrassed herself earlier, but now she was getting pelted by stray baseballs in front of you.

"i'm fine," she mumbled, trying to wave it off despite the throbbing in her arm. "it's just a bruise, i think."

"hyunjin was supposed to be watching where he was hitting!" you glared in the general direction of your teammate, a tall guy with a sheepish grin, before turning back to her, the worry still evident in your eyes. "let me check it out."

she hesitated, but before she could protest, you reached out, gently taking her arm to inspect the damage. karina swore her brain short-circuited at the contact. you were touching her. you were touching her.

"doesn't look too bad," you said, thumb grazing lightly over the spot. "but you should ice it later."

karina swallowed. "y-yeah. good idea."

your teammates, however, had no intention of letting this go. a few whistles rang out across the field, accompanied by hollering and laughter.

"get a room!"

"hey, y/n, you should kiss it better!"

"looks like y/n's got a girlfriend now!"

your face went red as the taunts continued. you rolled your eyes, dropping her arm and taking a step back. karina missed your touch immediately.

"ignore them," you muttered, glancing back at her with an apologetic smile. "they're just messing around."

karina, still reeling from the fact that you’d touched her, felt her cheeks burning, even more so when the laughter intensified. she could barely look up at you, embarrassed to the core. she almost wanted to disappear into the ground.

the weekend came, and karina was in the stands at your game, bundled up in her jacket, shivering slightly against the cool air. the stadium was packed with people, cheering and shouting as the players warmed up. she had never been to a game before, and she had to admit, she was a little excited.

ningning sat next to her, grinning widely. "this is so exciting! i can't believe we're actually here!"

giselle nodded. "me too. i've never been to a college baseball game before regardless of how many times y/n tried to convince me to go.”

winter smiled, leaning forward. "same! i hope they win! i heard the other team is undefeated."

karina could barely focus on the game itself as her eyes kept drifting to you on the field. you were out there, throwing some warm-up pitches, looking good in your uniform, your muscles flexing under the jersey. she had seen you play before (through videos), but up close, it was a whole different experience. it was hard not to be impressed.

when the game finally started, karina was on the edge of her seat. she didn't even realize she was gripping the edge of her seat until ningning whispered, "relax. it's only the first inning."

the game went on, and as it did, karina couldn't help but notice something was different. every time your eyes locked, you'd flash her a smile. a small, shy, almost hesitant smile. but a smile nonetheless.

and she'd smile back, feeling the butterflies in her stomach flutter wildly.

then came the final inning. your team was behind by just one point, and the crowd was on edge. it was your turn to bat, and karina could feel her heart hammering in her chest. she bit her lip, gripping her jacket nervously. this was it. this was the moment.

the first pitch came, and you swung—missed. the crowd groaned in disappointment.

you stepped back, adjusting your grip on the bat. karina’s palms were sweaty as she watched you prepare for the next pitch.

second pitch. you swung again, and this time, you made contact. the ball soared through the air, and the crowd went wild as it sailed toward the outfield. karina stood, her heart pounding, watching as the ball seemed to hang in the air forever. but then—it landed right into the outfielder’s glove.

she fell back into her seat, deflated. it was over. you had lost.

ningning slumped. "oh, well."

"maybe next time," giselle said.

but winter, ever the optimist, nudged her, giving her an encouraging smile. "i'm sure they'll win next time."

karina just nodded, not quite believing it herself.

"well, i guess that's that," giselle sighed.

you stood there for a second, disbelief crossing your features, before you took off your helmet and walked back to the dugout, head hanging as your teammates patted you on the back and murmured words of encouragement. she had really wanted you to win, and the way your expression had shifted after missing the second pitch broke her heart.

she wanted to go to you, but what could she say? she didn’t even know if you’d want to talk to her.

as the crowd slowly began to leave, karina stayed behind, watching as the other players headed off. she noticed you standing by yourself near the edge of the field, staring down at the ground. she hesitated for a moment before gathering her courage.

"y/n?" she called softly, stepping toward you.

you looked up, your face a little red and sweaty, but when you saw her, a small, tired smile tugged at your lips. "hey, karina. thanks for coming."

karina smiled awkwardly, then bit her lip, trying to figure out what to say. "you played great, even if… you didn’t win."

you chuckled. "thanks. i guess it just wasn't my day."

there was a pause, and she didn't want the moment to end, so she decided to go for it. "so, um, if you want to hang out—y’know, after the game? i could get us something to eat or ice cream or whatever. it might help?" she offered, biting her lip nervously.

you looked at her, eyes widening in surprise, and karina's heart dropped. had she been too forward? were you just being polite earlier and didn't actually want to spend time with her?

she opened her mouth to retract her offer, but before she could say anything, a smile spread across your face.

"i'd love that," you said, and she swore her heart skipped a beat.

karina felt like the luckiest girl in the world.

it’s strange how quickly things change.

the first time she calls you just to talk, you think it’s a mistake. you’re halfway through lunch when your phone buzzes, the vibration against the table pulling you from your thoughts. you glance at the screen, and the name staring back at you is karina. for a split second, your mind goes blank, and you freeze.

why would she be calling you? you can’t figure it out. you and her… you’re just figuring this out, right? you’ve been dating for about two months now, but still… you were expecting the casual texts and the occasional cute little memes she sends you, but a phone call? out of nowhere? that wasn’t on the schedule.

your first instinct is to ignore it. you tap the screen, ready to swipe it away without a second thought. it’s probably just a mistake—maybe she’s calling someone else and accidentally dialed you. it happens.

but then, for some reason, you hesitate. maybe you should pick up. what if it wasn't a mistake, and she was really calling you? what if she was trying to ask you something and didn't want to do it over text? what if there was an emergency? you can't help the small bubble of curiosity rising in your chest, so you hit the answer button and press the phone to your ear.

"hey, y/n," karina's voice greets you cheerfully, and you feel your heart flutter at the sound of her voice. "sorry for bothering you."

"no worries," you manage to reply.

"i was just thinking about you. i wanted to hear your voice.”

the way she says it catches you off guard, and for a second, you think she’s joking. but no, she sounds serious. she was thinking about you? like, genuinely thinking about you? you try to laugh it off, but it comes out more awkward than anything.

“uh, okay,” you respond, swallowing thickly, unsure how else to respond.

karina thinks it’s kind of unfair how you make her feel things like this.

you’re not flashy. you don’t say much. you never have. she knows this. but still, sometimes it gets to her — the way you can be so quiet and still make her feel like her whole chest is full.

like that night last week.

you’d had a game, and she knew you’d be exhausted. so she stayed up the entire night — grinding oats and mixing protein powders, googling “energy-boosting snack ideas athletes like,” and watching five different videos until she got the recipe right. she shaped every bar by hand, wrapped them neatly, and even wrote little notes on the bags, just something dumb like good luck today, don’t skip stretching.

you didn’t even look at the notes.

you had your earbuds in when she showed up to hand them over to your team, looking bleary-eyed but proud. all you did was thin out your lips, nod once, and mutter, “thanks.”

and then you kissed her forehead so quick she almost missed it and walked off like you didn’t just turn her insides to glitter.

she stood there, holding the tupperware lid, heart thumping against her ribs, unable to stop the grin spreading across her face.

it was embarrassing.

like when she helped you finish that impossible assignment. you’d been half-dead after practice, forehead pressed against your laptop while groaning like a wounded animal. she told you to go nap. you didn’t argue.

and when you woke up, groggy and blinking, she’d already finished it. sorted the references, checked the formatting, and saved everything neatly on your desktop.

she was actually kind of excited. proud. nervous.

but you looked at her like she’d just handed you a baby goat.

“why would you do that?” you’d asked, blinking hard.

she shrugged, cheeks burning. “i thought it’d help.”

you stared at her a beat longer before muttering, “you’re weird.”

but then you reached out and tugged on the sleeve of her hoodie so gently she barely noticed until your fingers brushed hers.

it’s the small things, really.

like how you always walk on the outside of the sidewalk, even when you don’t realize it. or how you’ll sometimes wordlessly pull her in by the strap of her bag when a bike rides too close. the way you toss your keys into the same bowl in her apartment even though you don’t live there. how you sometimes lean against the kitchen counter while she talks about her day, eyes half-lidded, like you're only half-listening—but then you’ll say something hours later that proves you heard every word.

how you never say i love you, but once, when she was stressed and crying over a project she thought she ruined, you wordlessly pulled her into your lap and said, “don’t be dumb. you’re the smartest person i know.”

and she knew, somehow, that that was your way of saying it.

her friends don’t get it. they ask why she’s so into you.

“she doesn’t even post you,” ning pointed out once, half-joking, half-serious. “is she even into you like that?”

karina had smiled, soft and small, and just said, “you don’t see the way she looks at me.”

because they don’t.

they don’t see how you never let her walk home alone, even if it means waiting an hour. or how you always notice when she forgets to eat, sneaking an extra granola bar into her bag like she won’t find it later and blush. they don’t see the way you fidget when she’s upset, like you’d do anything to fix it even though you hate talking about feelings. how you always, always pick up the phone on the first ring, even if all you say is a low, gruff, “what’s wrong?”

they don’t know how many quiet nights she’s spent curled into your side on the couch, your thumb brushing over her knuckles without a word. how you let her decorate your desk with tiny, sparkly trinkets even though they don’t match anything. how you’ll kiss her wrist when you’re half-asleep, like it’s a reflex, like loving her is something you do without even thinking about it.

"i just think it's weird how you basically obsessed over her for months, and now that you're together, she acts like it's nothing. i mean, don't get me wrong, i'm happy for you guys. but i'm just surprised, i guess. that's all."

it's not a fair comparison, and karina knows that. because it's different now. she's not obsessing anymore.

she's just falling.

karina is more shy than people think. she doesn’t throw herself at you. she just… gravitates. her pinkies always finding yours. her head always leaning toward your shoulder. she lives in the tiny pockets of space around you, content just to be near.

it drives her crazy because karina doesn’t like inconsiderate things.

not big, dramatic betrayals. just the little, accidental kinds. the ones that sting in ways you can't really explain out loud.

like when she brought up her study plans earlier in the week, fingers loosely laced with yours as you walked her across campus. her bag was heavy with textbooks, and she was talking about how she had two essays due, a group presentation, and an exam in the next five days.

you’d frowned at that. hummed once. she thought you might say something about how she needed to rest more or offer to make her coffee in the mornings again.

but you just hummed. and that was it.

you never brought up your game.

you didn’t even ask her to come.

she told herself not to be upset. that ningning was getting in her head. that you were probably distracted. focused. she knew how seriously you took baseball, how tunnel-visioned you got before games, and how sometimes even brushing your knuckles against hers was the most affection you could offer when your head was crowded.

still.

she watched it live on her laptop anyway. volume low. hoodie sleeves pulled over her hands. she saw your team win. she saw you run the bases with that crooked grin you always wore when you were proud but trying not to show it.

she smiled, too. softly. alone.

and then she turned the volume off again and went back to highlighting her notes.

you don’t text her after.

not even a we won. not even a you up.

she tries not to mind. earbuds in, another textbook propped open.

she thinks about sending a message first. congrats! or that was amazing. i saw the whole thing. or, even, i miss you.

but it feels a little silly. a little desperate.

so she doesn’t.

it's not like she's clingy.

she's really not.

she knows how it can look. how she always finds excuses to be near you, how she leans her head on your shoulder during movies and laughs too loud at your dumb jokes, and how sometimes she just can't help herself and has to tell everyone in earshot that you're her girlfriend.

no, no, no. enough of that. she's supposed to be studying, burying the almost-message. the wish that you’d notice how tired she is too. how stressed.

she spends the rest of her night studying in bed, hair pulled into a messy knot, black glasses sliding down her nose, highlighters bleeding through flashcards. her room is a mess. empty mugs stacked on her windowsill. papers crumpled at the foot of her bed. her laptop fan is wheezing because the piece of shit is nearly on its last life.

she doesn't move much, except to flip through her annotated reader or scrawl out the answer to another practice question with a pencil that’s down to a stub.

she’s halfway through rewriting her presentation outline for the third time when the knock comes.

a sharp, clear sound at the front door of her apartment.

karina jumps a little, startled out of her haze, blinking at the sudden silence that comes when she pulls one earbud out. she glances at the clock. it’s late. too late for a package, and her roommates aren’t expecting anyone.

she rises cautiously, stretching out her stiff legs as she pads through the hall in her socks. the knock comes again, knocking like they're trying to break the door down. karina almost doesn’t open it—because honestly, who shows up at a stranger's apartment at midnight without any warning?

but then you mumble her name through the door like a whine, and she’s gone, flipping the lock with a sigh and a half-smile already tugging at her mouth.

“there she is,” you slur, leaning against the doorframe. “my girl. you look—oh my god. you look so cute. are you real?”

“shh—” she hisses, yanking you inside quickly and shutting the door before your noise wakes the rest of the apartment. “y/n, it’s like two in the morning. can you not be so—”

“you didn’t come,” you say, suddenly pouty. “i looked for you.”

her stomach sinks. oh.

you had wanted her to be there.

she wants to slap herself. she shouldn’t have doubted you. she shouldn't have assumed you didn't want her there.

but why couldn't you have said something before?

she sighs, hands on your shoulders as she tries to steer you toward her room. “come on. you’re loud. everyone's sleeping."

you grin like a troublemaker. “but i won.”

when you reach her bedroom, karina flicks on the little lamp by her desk. her bed’s a war zone—notes, open notebooks, uncapped pens. her laptop’s still glowing, half an article pulled up, highlighters scattered across the sheets.

you’re already pulling off your hoodie, shirt riding up your back as you do, and she tries not to look because you’re still muttering nonsense and swaying like a tree in the wind.

she sets her jaw, quick to start gathering the mess. “seriously. go take a shower. you’re not crawling into my sheets like that.”

you laugh, and she hates the way her cheeks go warm. you shouldn’t be able to do this, even drunk.

you just blink slowly, fingers working the buttons of your jeans now, and then—quietly, like it’s muscle memory—you wrap your arms around her from behind.

mid-reach, her hand falters on a notebook. the warmth of your bare arms snakes around her waist. your chin settles on her shoulder.

“y/n,” she says, a gentle warning.

you ignore it. “you smell like rosemary shampoo.”

she closes her eyes. “that’s because it is rosemary shampoo.”

“you smell nice.”

she’s not used to this side of you.

you’re quiet most of the time. touchy, sure, but usually in a blink-and-miss-it kind of way—a hand on her lower back, a brush of pinkies, the way you pull her into your side during movie nights like it’s an afterthought.

you never do this.

never press up against her and say her name like it's the only word you know.

and she should really keep picking up the highlighters. she should really not melt.

but your nose nudges her neck. “missed you today. you always look pretty, but, like, tonight i kept thinking about how your ears turn red when you get embarrassed. did you know that? you get so flustered, and then you try to pretend you’re not.”

the words curl warmly down her spine, and she feels herself lean back against you.

“you didn’t ask me to come,” she says finally, the words coming out smaller than she intended.

you pause.

“didn’t wanna distract you,” you mutter. “you’ve been so busy.”

“but i wanted to be there,” she whispers.

“next time,” you say. “please come next time.”

karina nods, throat tight.

and then your hands rest on her waist, and she can feel the heat of them through her shirt.

it makes her breath catch, her skin buzzing under your touch. she tries not to squirm, but then you murmur, right against the shell of her ear, "you feel so good in my arms…my pretty, smart girlfriend…"

karina shivers, heat spreading across her cheeks. "i love when you say that," she breathes, voice shaky.

your lips brush her neck. "say what?"

"that i'm your girlfriend."

you chuckle, low and deep. "but it's true."

she bites her lip. "yeah, but it's still nice to hear." you let out a long sigh, trailing your hands up her sides, your palms warm even through the cotton, fingers slipping beneath the hem of her shirt, just barely grazing skin.

"fuck, i missed you."

she swallows thickly. "you did?"

"yeah," you breathe. "so much."

she turns around to face you, still pink-cheeked, eyes bright with anticipation. you smile, and she can't help but smile back, reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. neither of you says anything as you press forward, mouths meeting in a kiss that starts soft but deepens fast—your hands finding her lower back, her fingers curling into the fabric of your shirt.

it doesn't take long for the kiss to become heated, and soon you're tugging at pants, trying to undo the singular button as quickly as possible, and then she's falling back onto her bed, laughing and breathing hard, her lips swollen from kissing, her glasses askew.

and then you’re on her. kissing her again, messier this time. hungrier.

your hands settle on her thighs first, then slide up, coaxing her legs open just enough for you to slot yourself between them. she gasps into your mouth when your hips press down. your weight against her feels so good, so perfect, that she can't help but grind her hips up, trying to chase the friction.

"you're so pretty," you mumble against her neck, lips brushing her skin as you speak.

"oh god," she whispers, arching into you.

you smile, nuzzling her jaw, hands squeezing her hips as you press down harder. "feel good?"

"so good," she says, her eyes fluttering closed. there’s barely anything between you—just the fabric of your boxers and her underwear, but she can feel the way you harden, the way your cock twitches when she rocks against you.

she lets out a quiet moan, fingers tangling in your hair, tugging slightly.

"god, i'm so lucky. i get to have you all to myself." you kiss down her jaw, her neck, and her collarbone. her hands grip your shoulders tight. her thighs instinctively squeeze around your hips. "i love having you all to myself."

and when you do it again—grinding down slow, right where she needs you—she whimpers, hiding her face in your shoulder.

you press a kiss to her temple.

“my pretty, smart girlfriend,” you whisper again. “so good for me.”

she knows you care about her, but hearing it, feeling it, is something else entirely.

"please," you whine, hips rutting against her desperately. "i need you so much."

karina's breath hitches at the sound of your voice, low and raspy with lust. she knows she shouldn't give in; you're drunk, after all, and she has work to do. but when you look at her like that—eyes half-lidded, cheeks flushed—she can't bring herself to resist any longer.

"okay," she murmurs, cupping your face in her hands and pulling you down for another kiss. "i'm yours."

the words send shivers down your spine. you've been dreaming about this moment for weeks now, imagining what it would be like to have karina all to yourself. and now, finally, here you are—alone in her apartment, wrapped in each other's arms, ready to take things to the next level.

you smile against her lips, your hand moving to slide her underwear to the side, too caught up in the moment to even bother taking them off completely.

karina didn’t seem to mind either, her lips parting slightly at the feeling of the cool air.

you pull away just enough to pull down your own boxers, freeing your hard length before lining it up with her entrance. she moans softly as you start to push inside her, savoring every inch as she stretches to accommodate your size. once you're fully sheathed, you pause for a moment to let her adjust, kissing along her jawline and murmuring praise into her ear.

"fuck," you groan, hips rolling slowly, "you feel so fucking good."

she gasps as you fill her up, fingers digging into your shoulders. the pressure is almost unbearable; your cock seems impossibly large inside her, stretching her walls until she thinks they might burst from the pleasure. but then, without warning, you begin to move—thrusting in and out of her at an agonizingly slow pace.

every time you bottom out, you hit that spot deep within her that makes her see stars, leaving her shuddering and whimpering beneath you. her body trembles with each thrust, legs wrapping tightly around your waist, trying to draw you in deeper. it feels incredible; your skin is pressed flush against hers, hot and slick with sweat, and your breath ghosts over her neck as you pant and moan in her ear.

and when she opens her eyes, she sees you looking down at her with such raw adoration that it takes her breath away. "i love you," you whisper hoarsely, gazing into her eyes as if you want to memorize every detail of her face. "so much."

karina hides her face in your shoulder again, too shy to look at you while saying what she wants to say. "i love you, too."

the words tumble out of her mouth before she can stop them, but she doesn’t regret them one bit. they feel right, natural, like they've been waiting on the tip of her tongue for years. and maybe they have—maybe she's loved you since she saw your face around campus but was too shy to admit it to herself.

but now, here, with you, there's no point in denying it any longer. she loves you. every part of you. even the parts that drive her crazy sometimes.

your hands slide down her sides, gripping her hips tightly as you increase the speed of your thrusts. "i love you," she repeats, softer this time, her voice muffled against your neck.

"god, karina," you breathe, "you have no idea how long i've waited to hear you say that."

she laughs, but it comes out more like a moan as you hit that spot inside her once again. you let out a shaky breath, trying to control yourself, but she knows you're close—she can feel it in the way your cock twitches inside her, the way your fingers dig into her skin.

"you're so fucking perfect," you murmur, your thrusts growing sloppy and erratic. "i'm never gonna get enough of you."

and then, with one final thrust, you come undone—spilling inside her, filling her up completely. she gasps as your warmth floods through her, her own orgasm hitting her like a tidal wave. your name escapes her lips in a choked sob as she clings to you, nails raking down your back as the pleasure crashes over her.

you stay like that for a moment, basking in the afterglow, before finally pulling out of her and collapsing onto the bed beside her. she immediately curls into your side, watching as you drift off, a contented smile playing on your lips.

your fingers absently curl around hers, your breathing evening out. karina smiles softly, pressing a kiss to your cheek, feeling her eyelids grow heavy with sleep.

falling asleep next to her favorite baseball player—it feels like a dream.

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