jjmaybank4l

[jjmaybank4l]

Texts with Conrad fisher

[jjmaybank4l]

Warnings: strong language, drinking alcohol, self-harm attempt, scars, probably spelling mistakes don’t come after me😭 

I grab a bottle of vodka and walk into my room shutting the door sniffling. I open the bottle and take a big chug. My phone has been going off for hours. Mostly from my best friend conrad. He’s always worried about the most stupidest things. But this time, he probably should be worried. I look at my phone and open the texts from conrad. 

Yn why the hell are you not answering your phone. Answer I’m worried about you. Please. 

I sigh and put down my phone not texting him back just leaving him on read. An hour later and I’m really drunk and I’m sitting on my floor crying. As I wipe my eyes sniffling, I look at my cabinet beside my bed. I walk over to the cabinet and open the drawer. As I dug through the stuff in the drawer I found my razor. I grab it and sit on the floor bringing the razor to my arm. Just as i was about to slide it down my door opens making my head snap up. Conrad stands in the door way looking at the razor in my hand. “Yn what the fuck?!” He says running to me and taking the razor from me and checking my arm. “Con get off of me” I slur while i push him off me.  “Yn what were you doing?!” He says running his hands through his hair now standing over me as he starts to pant. “Nothing leave me alone” i say groggy as i try to stand up almost falling but catching myself. “Are you fucking drunk?!” He asks looking at the empty vodka bottle on the ground. “No Shit Sherlock” I roll my eyes as I stumble around the room looking out the window. “Yn tell me what’s going on.” He says turning my shoulder towards him so I make eye contact. My eyes and bloodshot red and my face is puffy from crying. “What were you doing with the razor.” He says sternly. “What the fuck do you think.” I spit back stumbling away. “Let me see your arm.” He says looking at me with tears in his eyes. “The hell no” I say scoffing. “Yn im not asking.” He says grabbing my arm and rolling up my sleeve. I try to pull my arm away but he’s to strong and I’m to drunk. He looks at my wrist and sees many scars. He slowly loosens his grip on my wrist letting me pull my arm away and roll my sleeve back down. “Yn…” he says softly. “Don’t.” I say softly walking away. “Is there any more.” He asks in a whisper. I stay silent looking at the floor tears in my eyes. “Please show me.” He asks walking towards me as I sit on my bed. “No.” I say quickly. “Yn.” He says sitting down next to me on the bed. “No conrad.” I say wiling my tears away. “Hey” he says reaching to hold my hand. He grabs my hand and I start crying. He then pulls my into his chest as I hug him tightly. I start sobbing and my body shaking. “I’m s-sorry!” I cry into his chest. “Yn it’s okay.” He says playing with my hair. “No it’s not okay!” I cry again. “Your okay. I’ve got you” he says. As he says that I just cry harder into his chest. Soon after what felt like forever I stop crying and I pull away wiping my tears and sniffling. “You should go to sleep. We can talk about this in the morning.” He says rubbing my back. “Can you stay with me?” I ask softly looking at the floor. “Yeah of course. I’ll always stay.” He says smiling. We lay down on the bed he pulls me into his chest, his fingers in my hair. I fall asleep almost immediately. He kisses my head and puts his head leaning on mine and falls asleep. 

[jjmaybank4l]

Cleaning JJ up

Warnings: panic attack, abuse, meltdowns let me know if I missed any!

theres a lot of spelling mistakes dont come after me😭

I knew that jjs dad was mean. I’ve never met luke and to be honest I don’t really want to. I was sound asleep at John b’s house in my bed that JJ and I shared. My phone rang. I groaned at the sound of the ringer. I looked at the time.

2:17 AM

JJ was calling me. “Shit” i said to myself as I answer the phone. “Hello?” I could hear JJ sniffling and his shaky breath “y-yn” he said. “J its not even 2:30 in the morning. Are you okay?” I ask yawning. “Um. C-can you come pick me up please?” He’s asks trying not cry. “Yeah jay of course where are you?” He waits a second to answer. “I’m at my house.” He says in a whisper. “Ok JJ I’ll be right there.” I say sighing and putting on one of jjs sweatshirts which was huge on me. I grab the keys to the Twinkie and drive to lukes house. I pull up and jj is sitting on the front steps hands in his hair. I pull up to the house and he slowly starts walking to the car. I notice he’s walking really slow and he’s limping. He gets in the car looking at his feet. “Do you wanna talk about it?” I say driving back to jbs house. “No” he says softly. “Ok” I say. We walk inside the house and I hold his hand as we walk into the bathroom and I turn on the lights. I see his cut up and bruised face. I gasp softly. “Jj” I say sadly hugging him tightly. He puts his head in my neck as he crys into my body holding my wasit tight. I can feel his tears on my shoulder. I play with his hair telling him it’s going to be okay. He just gets worse. He starts breathing really fast and his body shaking. “Jj sit down” I say as I lean him to sitting on the toilet lid. “I-I c-cant breathe” he says shaking. “Jj it’s okay I’m here your safe I promise” I say hugging his head and kissing his forehead. He starts to calm down. “Come on jj lets get you in the shower” I say turning the shower on and grabbing a towel for him. “I’ll bring you some extra clothes” I say as I leave the room letting him take his shower. After a few minutes later he opens the door sniffling his hair dripping. I walk in with a first aid sitting on the counter as he walks in between my legs and I clean his cuts. When I clean his cuts he winced and flicked away. “Sorry” I say softly. “Don’t be”.

After a few minutes all his cuts are cleaned up. “Thank you” he say softly. “You don’t have to thank me. I would do anything for you in a heartbeat” I say smiling to him. We walk into the room and I pull the blankets back for him. As soon as he lays down I start walking out of the room to go to the couch. “Where are you going” he ass softly. “I’m going to sleep on the couch so you have the bed.” I say smiling. “No. Please stay. I don’t want to be alone” he says softly looking at me sadly. “Ok jayj” I say smiling softly as I get into the bed. He lays his head on my chest and he holds my wasit. I play with his hair softly and draw shapes on his back. Soon I hear his soft snoring. I kiss his head and close my eyes. We fall asleep holding eachother. I love this man.