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carmy telling sydney that she loves taking care of people is SO specific and exacting coming from him bc carmy hasn’t really experienced or allowed himself care… yet he recognizes that ability and characteristic so astutely in sydney. 

that line is a callback to what nat says to him last season about chef’s liking to take care of people through their creativity, their gifts, their food. which is one of the reasons carmy gravitates toward food.

that’s one of the ONLY times he felt connected to and cared for within his highly dysfunctional and fractured family. THRU their likeness with and for food.

every other time he cared within his family, it was thrown in his face, he didn’t do it right or he was punished for trying.

part of him recognizing sydney’s brilliance and capability is absolutely about her skill and the food but it’s also about her ability to CARE about all of these things above and beyond the food as well.

something carmy really struggles with. like the accolades, the stars, certain details of the business. he can’t care bc care is such a tenuous and foreign concept to him on so many levels.

some people took noticeable (and justifiable) issue with all that he saddles sydney with both last season, and moreso, this season.

but without delving too much into the unjust and imbalanced distribution of labor on a black woman, which has valid and necessary critique, part of the reason carmy feels so comfortable and trusting in allowing sydney to do so many things is because he feels secure in her care and the expressions of it.

not for him specifically or directly, but for all the things that are required in their business. and even all that is required as a human as well.

he knows that her care extends beyond the food and the nourishment and the fulfillment of a meal.

and i think he does this almost unconsciously because he still wanted final say and approval on things. that’s his limited need for control and to know the working facets of a thing in order to feel certain it won’t implode.

but the CARE. that is something he sees in her. it’s something he’s lacked in a broader sense for most of his life. that care from another, directed back. 

carmy desperately wants to feel and experience care. but he can’t. he keeps it at arm’s length, he self sabotages from it. 

this also speaks to how we don’t ever even see HIM experience this basic care via a meal. like this guy is a chef, he’s surrounded by chefs and owns a restaurant yet he eats pb&js and poptarts?? cannot experience or allow himself care.

i think his simple acknowledgement and vocal proclamation of sydney’s care and heart is so special and impacting bc that’s what he needs. that’s what he desperately craves. but he has no real concept of it. he’s tried to display it so much throughout his life in his family but the remnants and byproducts have wounded him so severely.

so even in the way he expresses care there is an inconsistency or a haphazardness. 

which is also why him telling her earlier in this season: “you’re gonna have to care about everything, more than anything” is actually just a projection. because sydney doesn’t have a lack of perception and understanding and dynamic with care. HE does!

sydney has experienced care on additional levels he hasn’t had access to. sydney has been loved. even if primarily in a familial, parental way. that is a foundation for so MUCH when it comes to the capacity of care and nurture. both giving and receiving it.

this is also why he seems so visually fixated on her sometimes. he’s trying to gauge and learn her but also figure out how he can care for and about her (while also keeping her at an arm’s length and protecting himself) because someone like her is literally BRAND new to him.

this is why he can’t handle her being upset or peeved at him.

this why he called in the favor he did for something he KNEW she would care about wearing.

WHY HE LITERALLY TRIES TO GIVE HER WHAT SHE WANTS NEARLY ALWAYS.

he witnesses her capacity for care continuously displayed and feels his own opening up toward and for her.

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honeydew // forks // sundae

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What the absolute fuck is their problem?!?!? (Affectionate) (But also derogatory)

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1x08 + 2x09

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THE BEAR | 2.01

“Well…I’ll see you tomorrow.”

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These two are the reason I’m back on Tumblr.

Concerned Carmy™

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Hey you! I Missed you!!

Hey girl! It’s been a minute! How are you?

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oh sorry was i supposed to be normal about this

THE BEAR S02E09 “OMELETTE”

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SYDNEY ADAMU and CARMY BERZATTO in THE BEAR SEASON 2 (2023)

You're not alone, Syd. Neither are you.

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the bear (season 2) | "omelette"

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You could do this without me. I couldn’t do it without you. Yeah, you could. I wouldn’t even wanna do it without you. You know, you…..you make me better at this. You make me better at this.

Jeremy Allen White and Ayo Edebiri as Carmen Berzatto and Sydney Adamu in season 2 of The Bear (2022-present) created by Christopher Storer

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Carmy + Sydney + Parallels + Callbacks + Moments of Growth (Season 2)

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Logan’s partners as mirrors of the siblings

I’ve had this theory for a while that Logan’s primary partner in each season is a narrative mirror of the sibling whose “season” it is as prospective heir. I think 4x04 made the parallels more explicit with the return of Marcia and the scene between Kerry and Roman.

Marcia and Kendall Marcia begins the series as Logan’s wife, and Kendall as his heir apparent. In the first episode, Kendall is viewed by the financial world as the natural successor to Logan. Logan resents Kendall for being a concrete possibility for a future after him.

In “Tern Haven,” Logan turns his disdain for feeling forced into choices onto Marcia. Naming a successor is “not how [he does] things”. Nan Pierce’s comment that Marcia is “a credit” to Logan is soon followed by his having an affair.

Kendall and Marcia hold similar positions in 4x04. They were estranged from Logan, but were still his wife and successor on paper. Now that Logan is dead, their legal positions are all that matter in terms of securing power.

Rhea and Shiv Soon after Shiv becomes heir apparent in season 2, Rhea is introduced as a challenger. The two are both outsiders to the company. Shiv has been in politics for all of her adult life, while Rhea has worked at PGN. Shiv and Rhea are unique among the main cast of characters for being liberals.

Because of their time spent outside of Waystar, neither know the details of the Cruises scandal. Shiv alleges that she knows nothing.

Rhea and Shiv's similarities also have a visual component. In contrast to Logan's other partners, Rhea has lighter hair that she wears in a bob like Shiv.

Kerry and Roman This one is probably the most obvious comparison. Viewers have been pointing out Kerry and Roman’s frequently matching wardrobes since season 3. They also spend season 3 as Logan’s primary partner and most likely heir, respectively.

Though Roman is the middle sibling, he is viewed as emotionally immature and unserious by most of the other characters. This emotional youth translates to literal youth in Kerry. All they can offer to Logan is unconditional love, which is useful to him personally, but not publicly. Kerry could never be Logan’s wife, because their relationship is obviously exploitative. Roman could never be Logan’s successor, because Logan “thinks there’s something wrong” (3x09) with him.

Kerry and Roman also share the subtext of being “not real people.” The concept of “No Real Person” in Succession is often tied to sexual coercion. In other instances it is tied to racial and class-based violence, the latter of which is also applied to Kerry in 4x04. Among the first people that the term is applied to the series are sex workers murdered aboard Brightstar cruises. Kerry is treated as NRP in 4x04 because she isn’t upper class (works as an assistant, lives in a “little apartment”) and isn’t legally married to Logan. Kerry pays for Logan’s crimes as a billionaire exploiting the love/loyalty of an employee 50 years his junior by being thrown out of the wake. She is treated as “distasteful,” an ugly reminder of another wrongdoing Logan was never even challenged over. I think its common knowledge here that Roman is implied to be a CSA survivor—I’ll link to an article that details this in more depth. Like Kerry, Roman is viewed as “dirty” because of what has been done to him by other people who almost certainly faced no repercussions.

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Kendall Roy + Water.

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Episode 3x14: A Reflection of How Max Stepped Into Love After A Season of Suffering

Gif credit @supagirl

Hey guys! I can’t believe the season finale has come and gone! I think my mind is just taking time to comprehend everything that has happened! Sharpwin is officially canon! As I’m typing this out, it feels strange writing a meta on the other side of things. Since season one, I’ve been writing metas about how these two belong together and making predictions about the trajectory of their relationship. Now, to be on the other side of things where I know longer have to do that because these two are finally together is kinda crazy. I feel so elated!

Now y’all, I’m not going to lie to you, I had a totally different meta planned out and that meta is still in my drafts. I will probably release it because it was a general review of the episode but I thought it was more important that I put this meta out first. When I was watching the finale live, I didn’t love it. I just didn’t. I loved that Max and Helen finally got together at the end of the episode but I had a major issue with how it unfolded. The issue my friends was this scene right here: 

Baby!!! When I tell you this scene TRIGGERED me, it did! Now mind you, I wasn’t upset with Max’s storyline of searching and struggling to take off his wedding ring. It is human nature for Max to still have an emotional attachment to his ring. He’s not still grieving but essentially that ring is the only thing he has left of Georgia and represents a life he once had. Him taking it off was always going to be a monumental moment for Sharpwin and for himself. The issue that I had was Max casually telling Helen that he freaked out about losing his ring!!! To me, after the voicemail he left her, after Helen flew standby and was in a six hour flight to see him, it was an incredibly CALLOUS thing for Max to say. I know Max wasn’t thinking in this moment. I know his intentions were clearly not to hurt her but words matter and him being careless with his was a complete disregard of Helen’s feelings. She was deeply hurt and upset when he said this and rightfully so! I mean just look at her expression here:

Helen’s entire being read like

“I can’t believe you”

And girl same, because neither could I!! He knew he fucked up and he obviously made up for it in the end but y’all when I was watching it live, everything that came after that elevator scene was was tainted for me. I had a hard time believing that Helen would let what he said slide so easily and in the moment, I couldn’t appreciate the beauty of them finally coming together! 😩 In my personal opinion, there were so many other ways that scene could have played out without Max having to literally tell Helen to her face that he was worried about his wedding ring! I know they were trying to build up to the “big moment” where he finally takes his ring off and runs back to Helen’s apartment but man, that moment did not sit right with me in my spirit! It still doesn’t and I don’t think my opinion will ever change on this.

With that said, I’ve now done several rewatches of the finale where I specifically watched the scenes after that awful moment by the elevator. As I’ve had time to reflect, my perspective has changed. I no longer view the moments after the elevator scene as tainted but as something deeply profound and beautiful. Hell, even as I reflect on that scene by the elevator, I still don’t like it, but in a way I understand it in how it relates to Max’s overall journey when it comes to Helen. To me, Max Goodwin is a man who fell deeply in love with Helen in the midst of the most complex situations and a season of him suffering. It’s been deep rooted, complicated and messy from the start and over the past three years we’ve seen Max navigate through the complexities of his feelings for Helen and the circumstances he’s found himself in on our screens. I think when you look at season three finale and specifically the journey of Max finally making a choice to be with Helen, you have to put into context Max’s history and how it influenced what that looked like. So y’all that is exactly what I want to do in this meta so let’s dive in.

One thing I think we need to acknowledge is that, even though as an audience we have loved seeing Max and Helen’s journey unfold, the road has been so TOUGH for them. As Helen said in 3x13, it’s been a fight! Especially for Max. The suffering he has endured over the past three years has been unfathomable and much of his relationship with Helen and his feelings for her have been developed under these traumatic and tragic circumstances. 

At the very beginning of the series, when Max and Helen first meet they clash but it doesn’t last for long. It’s his first day at New Amsterdam and as the new Medical Director, he wants her to stay at the hospital and treat patients instead of doing press tours. Helen on the other hand wants to continue doing press and for the most part ignores his demands for her to return to the hospital. When she finally does return, she does so because she learns that Max has cancer. This bonds them at the onset as Helen is the only person in his life that knows about his diagnosis. As an audience, when we first see them interact, we instantly saw the sparks fly between them. Their chemistry and natural witty banter made us immediately take a look at their relationship and what potential they could have in the future. Though we were shocked by his cancer diagnosis, I think the fun and lightheartedness of Sharpwin’s first interactions really masked how traumatic this must have been for Max. On the first day of his dream job, that he sacrificed his marriage for, he learns that he has cancer while having a baby on the way. Those are the awful circumstances that first bring Max and Helen together. 

As Helen becomes Max’s doctor and he swears her to secrecy about his diagnosis, their friendship and bond grows deeper. His passion and drive to help his patients, reignites Sharpe’s love for medicine again and inspires her to put her patients first. They become vulnerable with each other more than anyone else in their lives. He confides in her about his broken marriage and she tells him that she wants a baby. When he almost dies, she becomes his deputy medical director so that he can focus on his care. All of these moments are significant to them because somewhere along the way they develop feelings for each other. They didn’t plan for it and it’s something neither of them are consciously aware of but unknowingly, they both start to fill a place in each other’s lives that was clearly more than a doctor and patient relationship or a friendship. This “place” wasn’t called out until episode 1x16 were the clairvoyant called out their feelings for each other. When episode 1x17 comes around, after a night of revelations and a scramble to get the power back on in the hospital, Helen decides to step back as his doctor. If she wasn’t aware of her feelings before, in this moment, she’s fully aware of them now. This is an effort to safeguard her heart and set boundaries because the lines of who they are to each other were already so blurred. When she “triages” their relationship Max’s reacts badly and honestly they’re both devastated and are on the verge of tears:

As viewers, we loved this moment but when you peel back the layers of what’s actually going on in this scene, it’s gut-wrenching. The subtext is so clear here yet their situation is so complex and layered. We know for a fact that Max wasn’t trying to lose her in ANY CAPACITY. We also know that in the way he TRULY wanted her he couldn’t have her and Helen knew that too. Not when he was married, had a baby on the way, and fighting cancer at the same time. Y’all that’s hard and profoundly painful when you think about it and it makes this scene all the more tragic. 

When Helen steps back as his doctor, at first Max seems to be handling it well but as his cancer starts to get worse, he completely breaks. Like I said earlier, over the course of his cancer treatment, Helen filled a place in Max’s life that was so much more than just his doctor or his friend. So when he’s dying and no longer has the person he feels deeply for play an active role in his treatment, he lashes out. He’s dealing with a range of emotions he can’t handle or properly process. Things only get worse from there and at the end of season one Georgia and Luna’s life are on the line and Bloom and Helen scramble to save them. When it seems like everyone was able to come out of that traumatic event unscathed, they get into a devastating ambulance crash that changes everything. 

Season 2 brings another level of pain and suffering for Max when he loses his wife after the crash and is thrust into single fatherhood. Not only is he grieving but he’s also dealing with guilt of falling in love with Helen while he was married. The complexities of his feelings is something he struggles with throughout this season and it affects his relationship with Helen. At some points he pushes her away and at others he desperately needs her. Once again, Helen and Max’s relationship is caught up in the most complex of circumstances that is riddled with agony and trauma. 

By time we head into season 3, Max doesn’t even have time to breathe or think about his relationship with Helen because they’re both thrust to the frontlines of the pandemic. 

I bring all of this up again to emphasize that there has never been a time where Max and Helen’s relationship hasn’t been wrapped up in trauma or some sort of suffering. It has always been one thing or another with them. It’s been A LOT and Max has tried to navigate being in love with Helen through his suffering and under these crazy ass circumstances. So after rewatching the finale, the questions that run through my mind are:

How do you step into love when all you’ve known for the past three years has been suffering?

How do you love openly and freely when for so long you’ve emotionally suppressed your feelings for someone because it was “wrong?” 

How do you let go, heal, and move on with your life?

To me, answering these questions is what the season finale for Max was all about. When you’ve suffered so much and endured so much it’s not easy to step into a new chapter in your life that’s hopeful and filled with love and possibilities. For Max, I don’t think in his wildest dreams that he ever imagined that he and Helen would be in a place where they could actually be together. Considering everything they’ve gone through, quite frankly it’s a fucking miracle! So when he actually makes it to the other side and not only SURVIVES but has a chance for happiness, I don’t think he knows what he’s doing. Pursuing/having feelings for Helen from a place that isn’t wrapped up in trauma and tragedy, where there are seemingly no obstacles in his way, is totally and completely new territory for Max. I think he’s clueless in how to do that in the right way and as he navigates through that, naturally there are hiccups.

That’s evident with what he said by the elevator and also in this moment here: 

Max doesn’t have a clue but he wants to make sure that he doesn’t fuck it up because he DESPERATELY wants this! I also think there’s something to be said about how we as human beings can self-sabotage ourselves when we finally have an opportunity to get what we want. Fear, guilt, worthiness usually comes into play with that and I think for Max there was definitely a fear with moving on with his life, guilt of surviving it all and having a chance to be with the woman he’s loved for so long, and a question of if he’s worthy of actually having happiness.

Their walk in my mind perfectly embodies him self sabotaging while also trying to navigate his feelings of desperately wanting to be with her. At the beginning of their walk, you see that at one point he clearly wants to hold Helen’s hand but he doesn’t (I would use a gif here y’all but I literally only have room for 10 😩). I’m focusing my attention on Max here because essentially this whole moment between them is a part of Max’s “mini story” in the episode. The ball has always been in his court and truly what we are witnessing is his journey to step into love because Helen is ready and has been waiting on him. 

The most compelling moment in their walk scene for me was this one: 

I find it strange for Max to walk so far ahead when he was the one who asked her if he could walk with her. My first thought while watching it live was “what is he doing” and I think Helen’s expression reads the same way. After analyzing this for a bit, I genuinely think that’s the point of this scene. Like I said earlier, Max doesn’t know what he’s doing. To be with Helen like this is, where its romantic, peaceful and drama free is probably blowing his mind and he doesn't know how to navigate this. He doesn’t know how to receive this second chance at happiness. 

The internal war of Max stepping into love or allowing fear, guilt, and unworthiness to hold him back becomes all the more evident when they get to Helen’s door: 

He knows he wants to come in. Helen know he wants to come in too. This man literally says goodnight twice and when Helen responds with “you said that,” it perfects this scene. She wants him to come in as well but she’s not going to ask him to. In this moment, she sees his internal struggle and she knows that he has to make the choice himself on whether or not he wants to move on with his life with her.

When he walks away, for a moment that was Max choosing to hold onto the pain and trauma of his past. That was him choosing to hold onto the guilt that was keeping him from healing and moving on. With the suffering he’s been through, it makes sense. In many ways he’s been conditioned to fight, to suffer and to endure. It’s what he’s used to. But praise the lord, he thinks of the moments he just shared with Helen. 

The joy he has with just being in her presence. 

The opportunity he has to freely be with her and have a life with her after loving her for so long.

He is not condemned to a life of suffering. It was only for a season. He’s in love with Helen and wants to be with her. Like hell is he going to let this opportunity at a second chance of love and happiness slip away from him. So guys, he slips off that ring, runs back to Helen’s apartment and makes a choice to step into love. Step into this new, uncharted, chapter of his life with Helen Sharpe. 

Anyway guys! I hope y’all enjoyed this! I might be releasing one more meta but we will see how it goes.

As always feel free to reach out to me on Tumblr and on Twitter @oyindaodewale. Love you guys!

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