joon4eva

[joon4eva]

just the tip? — kim namjoon.

genre: established relationship au.

summary: you and namjoon are left alone together for a little too long. or: in your childhood home, you learn just how much is really "just the tip" with namjoon.

word count. 3,994 words.

warnings. semi-public sex, namjoon doesn't need much convincing, oral sex (m. receiving) unprotected sex but reader is on birth control, creampie, namjoon takes oc's underwear.

note: happy early bday to our leader who keeps me sane and motivates me to keep living everyday. here is some horny fluff word vomit inspired by all the content we've been getting of namjoon looking delicious in his buzzcut lately. i couldn't resist. pics above are from @rkivsfe ♡

Namjoon seemed plucked straight from the pages of a classic romance, a perfect gentleman in every sense.

Throughout the day, your parents had been gracious hosts at their house, and Namjoon had gracefully navigated each conversation, his charismatic charm and impeccable manners in full display. 

Yet, it wasn't the refined qualities occupying your mind; rather, it was his freshly buzzed hair and the allure of his domesticated moments – like when he insisted on helping your mother – that made your heart race, feverish heat flooding your core at the thought of creating a home with him someday.

The both of you had never really properly broached the topic of children, especially since you were on birth control.

While you had only been dating for two years, discussions of having children had stayed respectfully on the back burner; the decision to wait until marriage, or at least until life was less hectic, appeared sensible to both of you. 

For now, life as it was felt fulfilling.

But lately, as you watched Namjoon tenderly cradle a friend's baby or playfully chase nieces and nephews at family gatherings, you began to see the appeal of having a family with Namjoon.

It was hard not to want it sometimes. 

It took every ounce of restraint not to lunge at him right there, an insatiable hunger bubbling within, barely contained. 

And when the rest of your family continued to mingle in the backyard, that was the moment you decided it was time to make your move. 

Namjoon's eyes narrowed perceptively, instantly detecting the undercurrent of mischief in your stride. 

Your smile, wide and radiant, was Oscar-worthy enough to mask your ulterior motives from everyone else; however, Namjoon could see right through your seemingly innocent offer of showing him a 'tour' of your childhood bedroom.

Determinedly, you grasped his arm firmly and practically dragged him up the staircase of your parents’ house and up to your old room located at the far end of the second-floor hallway.

—

To his credit, Namjoon nearly fell for your act. 

He attentively followed along while you animatedly led him around the room; pointing out the remnants of your teenage years evident in the faded posters of pop bands adorning the walls, a meticulously arranged collection of Studio Ghibli figurines that adorned shelves, and a colorful assortment of plush toys scattered about.

Golden sunlight pours through the window, playing on the sparkle in your eyes as your sundress embraces every curve. Beneath Namjoon’s clothes, a nagging ache intensifies, matched by the growing warmth and strain in his pants as he admires your radiance.

Slowly, time seemed to suspend itself, while the walls in your room appeared to close in on you both.

Soon enough, you found yourselves standing face-to-face, completely absorbed by each other's presence.

“You okay?” you ask in a hushed tone.

Namjoon's eyes sparkle with mischief, his eyes shamelessly lingering on your figure. The corners of his mouth turn up in a cheeky grin.

"I know what you’re thinking." 

Brows knitting together, you blink in feigned innocence. "I don't know what you're talking about," you murmur, eyes evading his as your arms cross protectively.

“Oh, of course. You were just so eager to show me your room,” he states matter-of-factly. 

Namjoon’s grin grows wider as he confidently strides closer, hands casually tucked in his pockets. “Nothing more to it, right baby?” 

What a fucking tease.

Warmth creeps up your cheeks as nervous laughter bubbles up, eyes avoiding his penetrating stare – Namjoon always had an uncanny ability to read you like an open book.

It was something that instantly made heat bloom between your thighs.  And when he was looking at you like that, it was impossible to hide anything from him. 

He tilts his head and studies you with an arched brow. “You have that look.”

“What look?”

“The bedroom eyes. I’ve seen it before.”

“I do not!” you manage to choke out, the words nearly vanishing from your throat.

Namjoon just chuckles, disarmingly smug. “Hm. If you say so.”

Within moments, you uncross your arms and navigate the remaining distance, your hands coming up to explore the contours of his body – fingertips slipping under his shirt, feeling the muscles tensing in his back before coming around and daintily migrating northward across his chest.

Namjoon leans down, claiming your lips with a fleeting kiss. "We probably shouldn't," he breathes out softly against your parted lips.

"Hmmm," you pout. "And why not?"

Not waiting for an answer, your lips continue their exploration – slowly moving from his lips, tracing the angles of his jaw, and dancing between gentle nibbles and fervent suction.

Beneath his shirt, your fingers tease his chest, leaving light scratches before brushing against his sensitive nipples.

It only took seconds before you could feel how hard and ready Namjoon was, as his skin burned hotter beneath your touch and his breaths grew shallow.

Trying to suppress a groan and maintain some level of composure, Namjoon bites down on his lip and whispers your name with an unsteady voice. 

"Your family is literally downstairs."

“They’re actually outside.”

Smiling mischievously, you return your attention to him by licking a slow stripe from his neck to the sensitive spot just below his ear – a place you’ve discovered he particularly enjoys being teased.

“I can’t promise I’ll want to stop at just kissing,” he warns with equal parts desperation and plea – a last attempt at cracking your resolve as his hands reflexively grip your waist in a manner both possessive and protective.

“And what?” you breathe out, each word soft and slow, a challenge in disguise. “Where would you want to stop?”

“I won’t.” 

Softening your gaze, you allow your lips to ghost over his. “Then don't hold back,” you whisper, pressing a tender kiss to the corner of his mouth.

His heated gaze flickers across every inch of you – taking in your expression, the way your body presses against his. You couldn't resist further taunting him. 

Your hands slide down his chest and towards the belt loops of his jeans, giving them a playful tug before swiftly moving to unbutton them.

It’s at this moment that Namjoon seems to snap out of his haze.

His lust-addled stupor evaporates like lifting fog, replaced by a rush of clarity where the lines between right and wrong become difficult to blur.

Suddenly decisive, he intercepts your wandering hands with a firm but gentle hold. 

“____. No.”

“I’ll be quiet,” you promise him, a sultry smirk playing on your lips, both tempting and dangerous.

“Baby. We are not fucking in your parents’ house—especially in broad daylight.”

"Oh, Joonie…" you sigh lovingly, pressing a tender and lingering kiss to the small mole just below his lip.

"Always such a gentleman. Holding my hand, praising me in front of my parents, even charming my mom... You don’t wanna fool around with me here?" 

Namjoon's mouth opens as if to protest further, but any words that threaten to come out are swallowed up by a groan that he struggles to stifle at the sensation of you swiftly tugging down his jeans and boxers, just enough for you to wrap your warm, tight hand around his thick length.  

"You’re…s-seriously out of your mind. We…we really shouldn't," he manages to utter, each word strained by the effort he puts into maintaining control – his dark eyes burning with barely restrained desire.

You pause your movements and look into his eyes. "We can make it quick. I promise I'll be quiet."

But you knew Namjoon had always preferred taking things slow, savoring every moment, especially during sex with you.

He was never really a fan of rushing, and you learned along the way he was big on foreplay. 

Yet seeing you present yourself before him like a priceless treasure, accompanied by batting those alluring, pleading eyes at him, Namjoon can't help but consider going against his instincts for once – if only for five fleeting minutes.

“I knew you didn’t want to bring me up here just to—Fuck, hold on. Wait,” he stammers, suddenly remembering, “I– I don’t have any condoms. Well, I didn’t bring any, for obvious reasons.”

An awkward silence settles between you two as the unspoken question lingers, and you gaze into his eyes, searching for an answer.

His eyes widen just a fraction when he realizes what you’re silently asking. 

“God, are you…—? No," he says firmly. "Absolutely not."

"But I've been on birth control for years!" you whine.

Namjoon closes his eyes briefly and exhales sharply, tension radiating from his clenched jaw.

“Babe,” he utters with a heavy sigh.

"Namjoon," your voice is barely audible as you breathe the plea into the curve of his neck, the warm air causing a shiver of desire to course through him. 

Your thumb glides across the tip of his cock, smearing the glistening pearl of pre-cum that gathers from the tip.

Your lips begin to trail gentle kisses along the length of his throat, all while teasingly drawing the tip of your fingers up and down his shaft.

Namjoon's breath catches in response to your touch, gasping as he involuntarily thrusts upwards to meet your hand.

“What about ‘just the tip’?” you whisper. “Isn’t that something that guys like to do?”

“Well… I-I’m paranoid and we should be careful,” he stammers out. “It only takes one time, you know. Can’t this wait until we get home?” 

Noticing his faltering resolve, your lip catches between your teeth to suppress a sly grin. Wordlessly, you slowly sink to your knees in front of him. 

He watches transfixed as your tongue traces a slow path up the engorged vein of his cock, pausing to swirl around the head before taking him fully into your warm mouth.

Namjoon emits a soft groan - hands delicately cradling your jaw - while your cheeks hollow and your head begins to bob rhythmically, dewy eyes peeking out from beneath your lashes to watch him.

His head falls back and his eyes squeeze shut, fighting to restrain a moan as desire shoots through him like wildfire, fuelling your own craving for him even more fervently. 

You could sense him teetering on the edge, his self-restraint waning with each moment until, in one deft motion, he withdraws from your mouth just enough to stagger back, hoisting you up by your arms and steering you backwards until the mattress edge halts against your knees and topples you onto it. 

“You’re fucking shameless, you know that?” he pants, scrambling to shove his pants further down and stepping between your legs, holding his hard cock and leaning over you.

Below him, you giggle and hurriedly push your dress up, sliding your panties down and kicking them aside.

Grabbing your wrists, he pulls them over your head and pins them there.

And as his body aligns with yours – his strong chest firm against your breasts, his crotch deliciously nestled between your thighs – every last drop of doubt vanishes from both of your minds. 

Under the sultry gaze of his darkened eyes, he grips your face, his large hands cupping your delicate cheeks, thumbs tenderly caressing the soft skin. 

Your mouths meet urgently; his lips hungrily pressing against yours to lick and tug at your bottom lip, expertly swallowing every stifled sound that begs release.

"Joon," you murmur tenderly against his parted lips, pausing between kisses. "Touch me, please."

Your honeyed pleas don't go unanswered; Namjoon's hands swiftly comply with your demand, gently pulling down the elastic neckline of your dress far enough to let your breasts spring free. 

"Such a tease, wearing this," Namjoon grunts, grabbing a fistful of your dress, "fuck."

His eyes darken at the sight before him: your dress invitingly pooled at your waist, thighs parted and slightly glistening from your arousal visible even to him.

It was nearly impossible for him to deny you anything at all when you pleaded with that breathy, needy tone.

His lips move with purpose, trailing a series of warm, sweet kisses across your collarbone, down to the valley between your breasts – lingering just long enough to elicit a breathy gasp before grazing your stiff nipples with feather-light nips. 

You struggle to bite back any gasping moans – honoring the promise you hastily made earlier – with only the softest sighs escaping your pursed lips.

“Feels good?" Namjoon murmurs softly, his hand navigating the space between your bodies to trace delicate circles around your throbbing clit.

"God, you're soaking wet already and I've hardly touched you."

Desperately trying to maintain silence, you find your hips moving instinctually in rhythm with the sinfully slow motions of his long fingers. They gather your slickness, teasingly near your dripping entrance with one finger before returning upward to trace unhurried, deliberate circles on your clit again with two fingers. 

“Wanna come first?”

Your bottom lip captured between your teeth, you shake your head.

"Can we… Can you pull out?" breathlessly escapes from your lips.

He groans your name gently, punctuating his words with a delicate nip on your jawline. "What happened to 'just the tip'?"

"I changed my mind," you whine weakly, stifling a frustrated groan when his fingers stop their movements.

Namjoon's chuckle against your skin is light and teasing. "My greedy girl,” he coos affectionately against your lips before pressing a lingering kiss on the corner of your mouth. 

“Wonder what your parents would think if they knew that right now, their precious daughter was up here with me, legs spread wide and begging for me like this? Hmmm?" 

His dirty words make you choke on a barely suppressed moan, but you do nothing to discourage him.

He doesn't pull his fingers away from your aching core – instead, he bends down to lick them clean before gently pressing them back inside of you.

“Please, just please, can we…” your voice falters as it dissolves into unintelligible murmurs, desperate for relief, desperate for him to fill you up the way you want. 

"So needy," Namjoon chuckles softly at your struggle for coherence; swiftly replacing his fingers with the head of his cock. 

"You’re sure about this?" he whispers hoarsely, the feel of him nudging at your entrance sending already rioting butterflies into overdrive.

Your hands instinctively slide over the firm contours of his backside, urging him closer as your hips rock against his. “Wanna feel you. All of you,” you softly mewl in his ear.

A primal growl emerges from Namjoon’s throat before he nips lightly at the tender flesh of your neck. “So filthy.”

Namjoon finally pushes inside of you, inch by torturous inch, until he’s buried to the hilt inside of you, slowly filling and stretching you in a way that makes your legs shudder and lock around his waist. 

His hips still, giving you time to get adjusted, or perhaps in an attempt to try to steady himself. 

He nuzzles into your neck, spreading his warm breath all over the soft skin there, nudging aside the fabric of your dress to press a kiss to your bare shoulder.

Your arms come up to wrap around his neck, fingers dancing across his freshly trimmed head, massaging and scratching softly at his scalp.

Your hips slightly roll to guide him deeper, enticing him to start moving. 

It's sheer, unadulterated bliss as he pumps into you, filling you up in perfect harmony with your own unsteady breaths.  

It feels even better than you thought – so warm and wet and snug around him, nothing has ever felt as good in your life. 

Out of all the things you and Namjoon have tried, this was something that you just haven’t done. 

And now you know you were ruined.

Ruined for using a condom ever again with this man. Your pulse is pounding so hard against your ears that it seems impossible to focus on anything else at this moment but him and how good it feels to have him bare inside of you. 

"You feel so fucking good, baby," Namjoon breathes hotly against the column of your throat. "So tight around me."

He’s fucking into you agonizingly slow and deep; his movements are deliberate and unhurried, each deep, slow stroke filling the air with your muffled moans and the wet sounds of your slick bodies every time his hips snap up against yours.

His hand entwines with yours, palm-to-palm above your head, while his other arm holds you closer by the thigh curled around his waist.

Enveloped in a sensuous fog where your senses blur and bend, you feel him gradually quicken his pace, each thrust growing more intense.

Namjoon nuzzles his face into your neck, soft moans vibrating against your skin. 

Teasingly, his pulsating shaft glides out completely – slow, torturously slow – pausing just before thrusting back in; filling you completely, his tip applying pressure to a hidden sweet cluster of nerves within you that ignites an uncontrollable tightening around him.

An unfamiliar sound escapes from your throat – a strange mixture of a whimper and his name – and he gasps before laughter takes over.

His hand comes up to quickly muffle your sounds.

"Babe," he warns between giggles and gasps for air. "You promised you'd be quiet." 

“But—” your weak rebuttal trails off as warmth spreads across your face and tears gather at the corners of your eyes. “B-but it’s just so… F-feels… so…”

"Shhh, I know," he whispers tenderly against your mouth.

Namjoon’s hand trails from the curve of your thigh to weave through your hair, tightening at the back of your head and pulling you into another heated, sloppy kiss. 

“Doing so well for me,” Namjoon whispers between kisses. “Taking it all.” More kisses. Rougher and wetter. “S-so pretty… so fucking pretty wrapped around me like this.” 

With each impassioned stroke, you cling to him; muffled moans of his name escaping between breathless kisses as waves of warmth wash over you. 

"Want you to come... come inside, Joon, please," you softly plead.

Ardor begins to strain at every seam, your sweet plea threatening to shatter Namjoon's restraint, nearly sending him over the edge.

“Yeah? You close, baby?”

Your eyelids grow heavy, closing tightly as your head fervently bobs in agreement, words failing you.

To this, Namjoon plunges into you with a growl. His cock kisses your g-spot, again and again – and his face is a canvas of pure ecstasy as he thrusts forcefully, his hips colliding with yours while he drives himself even deeper, almost as if he was working to etch himself into your very being. 

Your teeth press into his shoulder to muffle your sobs, while your hands frantically wander— sliding under his shirt to rake at the damp skin of his back or bunching at the wrinkled sheets, desperately searching for something to ground you as he pounds into you, each powerful motion stealing more breath from your lungs. It’s a drawn-out, slow rolling orgasm that he drags out of you.

He fucks you through your climax; deep, steady thrusts that makes your legs quiver and your eyes lose focus as they roll back. 

A low, guttural moan suddenly escapes him as warmth begins to flood every nook and cranny within you, occupying and filling every gap.

The pulsating of the thick vein lining the underside of his cock throbs with each burst of his release, while your own walls tenderly constrict around him.

Your vision is consumed by whiteness as your eyes clench shut from the sheer force of shared euphoria, your mind wonderfully blank.

And then, stillness. 

He stays buried inside you, his large frame forming a protective shield around your body, like a giant blanket swaddling you both.

His nose gently nestles against the side of your neck, as the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest comes to match yours, slowly and peacefully. Your legs are still wrapped snugly around his waist, your hand tracing slow, lethargic circles on his back beneath his shirt.

“Holy shit,” you breathe in elation, “we should do that more often.”

Namjoon huffs out a laugh. Carefully shifting his weight, he hovers above you, hands on either side of your shoulders. “That good?”

“Yeah,” you exhale with a grin. “Really good.” “Really good,” he echoes with a laughter that dances at the edges of his eyes and alights the depths of his dimples.

And you laugh, too, delightfully dizzy and slightly sticky with perspiration as the sun spills through the window's gaps, rays of golden syrup bathing you in warmth.

Namjoon presses a fleeting but tender kiss to your mouth and gently pulls out of you, leaving a lingering emptiness and a sweet ache in your core that lingers.

His eyes curiously wander down to the apex of your thighs and you watch as his hand wanders down to pry your legs apart, his fingertips holding them open as he watches the warm, viscous fluid of his cum slowly form a trail from your entrance. He traces a gentle finger through the slick aftermath, a satisfied hum resonating as your body shudders with blissful oversensitivity. 

In this proximity, he bends down to place a tender kiss on the side of your jaw, with words that now flow like honey. “Think we could make that a priority,” he murmurs.

He follows up with another feathery kiss directly upon your lips - an almost chastely innocent smile dancing across his features, almost sinfully ironic.

You find yourself grinning in response to his obvious overture before letting your hand wander lower on his back.

Slowly, deliberately, almost flirtatiously, it reaches and gropes his rear end. "So would you be open to round two then?" you tease playfully as your fingers pinch just enough for him to know you're serious.

Namjoon’s immediate reaction is priceless – a jolt forward accompanied by an adorably indignant yelp as he tries (and fails) to hide his surprise at your boldness.

All he can do is shake his head at you in disbelief before giving in once more to laughter. 

Eventually regaining some composure, he chides you gently by flicking your forehead with one finger, mimicking chastisement but betraying nothing but affection. You feign complete agony with a comically exaggerated moan and grip to your forehead, earning another round of laughter from Namjoon.

“Jesus, baby,” he says, exhaling a heavy breath, forcing a laugh. “You’re going to kill me.”

He shifts to a seated position on the mattress next to you before standing up, his back straight and his movements curiously graceful for someone so tall.

Your gaze follows him, transfixed as he grasps the edges of his boxers and jeans, lifting them back over his lean hips. 

You have to internally curse at how his shirt clings to him like a second skin, accentuating his broad form as he calmly fastens each button, the muscles in his biceps rippling subtly in the process.

This simple act (an undoubtedly mundane and ordinary action) transforms into a hypnotizing display just by virtue of it being Namjoon. 

Shifting your position slightly, you slide the straps of your dress back into place, readjusting the elastic neckline to cover your chest.

Propped up on your elbows, your eyes dart around for your missing panties.

Namjoon seems to be almost telepathic in this moment, glancing over and catching your eye.

Realizing what you're searching for, a playful smirk forms on his lips.

He bends down to retrieve your underwear from its hiding spot on the floor and rather cheekily shoves it into his pocket instead of handing it to you.

Feigning irritation, you huff as he saunters victoriously across the room towards the bedroom door with his stolen trophy secured in his pocket. 

“Namjoon,” you protest, now sitting up completely. “I need those!”

"You can have them back later," he calls over his shoulder as he begins opening the door. 

The curve of his lips breaking into a gentle smile as he adds, "Let's go home. And don't worry, love - I'll keep these safe for you."

As if to emphasize his point, he gives the pocket safeguarding your panties a delicate pat - one last playful jest before disappearing beyond the doorway.

[joon4eva]

drunk in love — kim namjoon.

genre: best friends to lovers. mutual pining.

summary: you and whiskey are never a good combination. or: you've been in love with your best friend for years and you might tell him about it while drunk.

word count. ~2,597

warnings. OC is a stubborn drunk, heavy kissing.

note. swiped two pics from u @doucillies; ur moodboards are adorable (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡

masterlist

"Okay, it's time to go home."

"Nooooo," you whine, crossing your arms over your chest. "I'm havin'—hic!—the most fun right now!"

“We’re not doing this while you’re drunk, ____. Let's go.”

“I’m not”—you hiccup, hand flying up to your mouth, so ready to barf—“drunk.”

Namjoon rolls his eyes and grabs your arm, guiding you towards the exit of the crowded bar.

The room seems to tilt and wobble around you, like the inside of a snow globe shaken by a child. The alcohol in your system clouds your thoughts, transforming words into unintelligible murmurs and making the edges of your vision fuzzy.

You're not one to go out often, but tonight had been a night unlike any other. Drinks had flowed like water, and one had quickly turned into, well… too many to count.

"I c'n walk on my own!" you protest, somewhat indignantly. But as soon as the words leave your mouth, your knees buckle beneath you, and Namjoon is there to catch you before you can collapse onto the floor.

He sighs, shaking his head in amused exasperation.

"Sure, you can," he mutters sarcastically while looping an arm around your waist.

You lean against him heavily, suddenly grateful for his support as the world continues to swirl around you in a dizzying blur of colors. Your own head is swimming with the protests it's trying to form, yet all you can do is let out an indignant 'pfft'.

The cool night air greets you as Namjoon leads you out of the bar. Your senses are assaulted by everything—the sound of car horns honking in the distance, the bright street lights reflecting off shiny shop windows, the smell of old cigarettes and half-eaten takeout littered on the streets.

Namjoon hails a cab quickly enough; it seems as though all yellow cabs magically congregate whenever he raises his hand.

You slump into the backseat next to him and he rattles off an address to the driver before turning to face you.

"Do I have to worry about you hurling in my apartment?"

You shake your head vehemently despite how it makes everything feel like it's moving at warp speed around you. "I wo'nn… promise."

"You better not," he says, but there's no real bite to his words, just a soft smile that makes your head spin more than the alcohol ever could.

The rest of the car ride is a blur, punctuated by stifled giggles and quiet singing along to random tunes floating through the airwaves.

The car finally comes to a stop outside Namjoon's apartment building, and he practically carries you inside, supporting your weight as you half-walk, half-stumble towards the elevator.

His apartment greets you with its familiar warmth and comforting scent.

You shed your shoes immediately upon entering; he always hated when people wore shoes inside.

Namjoon takes you by the hand and leads you to his bedroom. There's no discussion about where you'd sleep–it was never really up for debate. You had spent more nights in his bed than your own over these past few months, sharing the space like it was a natural extension of your friendship.

But deep in your heart you felt the lines of this friendship slowly blur until they were nearly indistinguishable.

You vaguely recall Namjoon going out on dates with other women – discreetly canceling on you for an evening or casually mentioning it over coffee when he couldn't spend time with you.

Each mention was like a dagger in your heart; the mere thought of him being with someone who wasn't you caused a painful twisting sensation in your chest.

Namjoon helps you sit down on the edge of his bed, pulling off your socks before turning around to rummage through a drawer for some pajamas or anything that would fit you comfortably.

He pulls out an oversized shirt and hands it to you, ushering you towards his bathroom. He stands outside the door while you splash cold water on your face, trying to sober up just enough to not become a nuisance.

In the quiet of his apartment, even the steady rhythm of your heart pounding in your ears feels deafening.

Once you're dressed in the soft fabric that smells distinctly of him, Namjoon helps you sit on his bed again while he looks for more blankets.

In these rare moments of silence, your thoughts begin to spiral towards a dangerous territory. A confession, long buried under fears and doubts, bubbles to the surface.

"Namjoonie…" you slur giddily, your words blurred and hazy even as their weight is clear.

"Hm?"

"I love you," you mumble sincerely between hiccups.

He chuckles lightly and shakes his head. "Oh man, you're definitely drunk. I love you too."

"'m serious," you insist, each word heavier than the last. "Like, really... really love you.

He pauses in his search for a blanket momentarily, looking back at you with furrowed eyebrows but still not taking it entirely seriously.

"And I really love you too," he murmurs back softly, turning away from you again.

Finally managing to locate an extra blanket somewhere, Namjoon walks back over, gently draping it across your legs and sitting on the edge of his bed.

For a moment, the drunken haze seems to clear from your mind- just enough for him to see your vulnerability shining through.

"You don't get it," your voice wavers as you flop over onto Namjoon's pillow, breathing in his comforting smell. "'m sooo in love with you. Can't ssannd it. Tried t' ignore it, but ev'ry day, ev'ry night—it's always you.."

His lips part and his eyes go a little wide. He blinks at you, fighting back a smile though the hint of one lingers around your words.

“You’re drunk,” he eventually says, shaking his head.

“Maybe," you hum thoughtfully, "…but I won’t be in th' morning.”

Namjoon's gaze flickers to the side, his eyes boring into a spot on the wall as though he can shield himself from any potential heartbreak.

He lets out a quiet sigh and he runs a hand through his hair, clearing his throat before speaking.

"We can... we can talk about this tomorrow," he suggests softly. "When you've had some sleep and are sober enough to remember it."

"If you still feel this way then, we'll talk, okay?"

You frown at him stubbornly as he starts to settle you into bed. The soft duvet feels heavenly beneath your weary form, but the innate rebellion within you only swells stronger. “I don' need help,” you argue halfheartedly, poorly attempting to push away his supportive grip.

Namjoon just smiles gently, continuing to tuck you in despite your protests. "Of course you don't."

His familiar shape slips under the duvet beside you, close enough for comfort but still mindful of boundaries as you both drift off to sleep.

—

When dawn breaks, the first rays of sunlight creep through the cracks of the curtains, casting a warm golden glow across your faces.

It's only when Namjoon's bedroom starts to steadily regain its color that you wake up, face planted into one of the softest pillows you've ever had the pleasure of sleeping in.

Groggily, the memories from last night begin to trickle into your still foggy mind.

You're half-convinced it was all just a dream—an alcohol-induced haze of emotions and repressed feelings. But as you move to stretch out, stifling a yawn, you come face to face with Namjoon asleep beside you.

His face is relaxed, lips slightly parted as he sleeps. One arm is thrown casually over your torso, the other tucked under his pillow. The warmth of his breath tickles your cheek, and it's both terrifying and exhilarating.

You stare at him for a moment - taking in the curve of his jaw, the slope of his nose, and the dark fringe of eyelashes against his cheeks. It feels like discovering Namjoon all over again - this time much different but just as wonderful to behold.

Namjoon stirs, his arms reflexively tightening around you while he fights the urge to wake.

You catch a stray lock of unruly hair that has fallen across his face with trembling fingers.

His eyebrows crease slightly, and he sleepily opens his eyes to meet yours.

For a few moments, the two of you just gaze at each other, silent as his grogginess fades into a dawning realization. "Hey," he mumbles softly.

Your chest constricts as a half-smile finds its way on your face. "Hey," you respond softly back.

"You stayed."

"Of course."

His arms tighten around you once more as he pulls you flush against him, nestled securely between the heat of his body and the cool cotton sheets.

"I thought you would run away," he murmurs softly into your hair, chuckling when he feels you shake your head.

Honestly, you could easily drift back to sleep like this, feeling the gentle rhythm of his breathing and the soothing patterns his hand traces on your back. But just as your eyes are about to close, his voice rumbles from his chest.

"How are you feeling?" he suddenly asks.

"I've been better," you reply honestly, muffled against his shirt.

There's a beat of silence.

"Do you remember anything from last night?" he asks.

"Not much. I remember you taking me home but everything else is blurry."

"I didn't do anything dumb, did I?" you ask.

"Well, that depends on your definition of dumb."

"Hmm. Anything I would be embarrassed about?"

"Other than the fact that you're a very stubborn drunk, no," he reassures you with a quiet laugh. "...But you did say some things."

"Oh, like what?" you ask, pulling back far enough from him so you could see his face.

There's a slight pause, his gaze momentarily flicking from your eyes to your lips.

"You said you loved me."

You nod, taking a moment to figure out how you were going to respond.

Though those words still linger as truth in your head, hearing them out loud like that is difficult to put into words. You could easily dismiss them as drunken ramblings but Namjoon knows better; he can always read you like a book.

There's only so much denial you can carry on with before eventually being swallowed alive by the chaos of your emotions.

You sigh and retreat back into his arms, nuzzling your face further into his chest. Namjoon doesn't press or push any further. Instead, he holds you tighter. Neither of you says anything for a while.

"What's on your mind?"

"Nothing, really," you say, swallowing back the lump that has formed in your throat.

"Mm, don't do that."

"Do what?"

He draws away from you, but keeps his hold firm, almost as if you'll slip away if he lets go.

"Lie," he says softly, the ghost of a smile playing on his lips. "I know you better than that."

He smirks, amused at your stunned silence. He knows just as well as you do that he's successfully called your bluff.

"You already know the answer," you finally say.

He laughs at this, his eyes adorably crinkling at the corners and those dimples you absolutely love coming out to make an appearance.

You can feel your heart pounding with him so close; though the two of you always have been close friends, this new proximity makes your cheeks flush and your thighs press together reflexively.

Through this haze, a sudden surge of self-awareness hits you, reminding you that your hangover has most likely wreaked havoc on your appearance. You nervously lick your lips and rack your brain to quickly come up with an excuse to get out of this situation, and get out of it fast. 

Namjoon seems to pick up on your unease, reaching out and taking your hand gently. He guides it towards his chest, placing it right above his heart, urging you to meet his gaze again. His warmth eases some of your anxiety, and you finally meet his gaze again.

You can feel the steady beat of his heart under your fingertips, its rhythm slightly quicker than normal. He looks intently at your lips, and the corners of his mouth turn up into a faint, tender smile.

“I just want to hear you say it. Please,” he whispers.

Fully surrendered to him, to whatever this was, you find your voice.

"I love you," you manage to utter through the tightness in your throat.

Satisfied with your answer, he smiles and leans in to press a soft kiss to your forehead.

Now only inches away, his breath is warm on your face and his lips nearly graze yours when he asks, "Do I have permission?"

You give a slight nod, and that's all it takes for Namjoon to cup your chin with one hand and slightly tilt your head back to press his lips firmly against yours.

His lips are warm, surprisingly soft against your own, and as the kiss deepens, every lingering doubt is wiped away with each sweep of his tongue; it's delicate and excruciatingly slow. 

You let out a soft sigh against his lips as your fingers slide up to tangle themselves into his hair, gripping it to bring him impossibly closer. You lose yourself completely in it, every inch of your body humming to life as desire courses through your veins.

You can't help but release a gasp against his lips, which he swallows and echoes with a soft groan that reverberates through your chest. Your hands find their way down to his strong arms, fingertips pressing into the taut muscles there before coming to rest at his shoulders.

You shift against him as the kiss intensifies; legs tangling together beneath the cool cotton sheets. The air around you fills with soft moans and exhalations.

Between lingering and hardening pecks on your swollen lips, you feel him whisper against your skin—"My everything...", "...Wanted to do this for so long..."—and each phrase causes an answering shudder to course through every fiber of your being.

The faint traces of stubble on his jaw graze against your face in a way that feels rough yet exciting – a sensation you hadn't experienced before. By now, it seems as if every nerve in your body is on high alert, attuned to every caress and tender touch that passes between you.

His touch remains gentle as his hands slide beneath your his soft cotton shirt, tracing patterns along the small of your back.

Your torso is now pressed up against his so tightly that it would be nearly impossible for a piece of paper to fit between you two. He responds with a low hum of appreciation and he reluctantly ends the kiss but doesn't break away entirely; his forehead rests against yours as both of you try to catch your breaths.

It doesn't take long for your lips to start exploring new territories; they traverse each other's jaws, press tender kisses along each other’s necks, and gently nibble on earlobes – all provoking delightful sighs and moans that fill the room.

Namjoon then gently rolls you flat onto your back, never breaking contact as he hovers above you.

A warmth radiates through the air as he pulls back just enough for his breath to softly brush your lips. "I love you too," he confesses, his eyes searching yours for any trace of doubt.

The whispered words could have been drowned out by the sound of your pounding heart, but they cut through the air like a dagger.

"And I always will."

[joon4eva]

[joon4eva]

forg_tful — kim namjoon.

summary. where namjoon's forgetfulness gets him into trouble.

genre. established relationship ✰ angst ✰ fluff

word count. ~3,482 words

tags/warnings. angst; lots of it, crying, namjoon is a green flag idc, oc is whipped, apologies and a happy ending, oh also here's this to give you an idea of how i pictured joon towards the end of the story

masterlist :)

"sorry"s and "i forgot"s seemed to become part of your daily conversations.

tonight was the night you'd been waiting for, the evening you finally introduced namjoon, your boyfriend, to your parents over dinner. to your relief, everything went smoothly and your parents adored him.

however, despite the outward success of the event, frustration bubbled deep within you.

the reason for this internal turmoil stemmed from multiple factors. first and foremost, you were late to the dinner; an issue in itself.

but what added fuel to the fire was that your tardiness was a direct result of namjoon forgetting about the event altogether.

this wasn't simply a matter of being late - it went much deeper than that.

you had done everything possible to ensure he would remember – leaving sticky notes on the fridge, setting calendar reminders on his phone – but to no avail.

in the beginning, namjoon's forgetfulness was almost endearing – he would forget where he'd put his keys or the name of that movie you both watched last weekend. but eventually, this tendency seeped into larger aspects of your relationship, causing him to miss important dates or appointments - moments that mattered a lot to you.

it seemed like you were constantly having to cut him some slack and reschedule plans, hearing apologies aplenty.

but somehow, namjoon always knew how to make it up to you - showering you with kisses and sweet gestures, making incredible plans for recompense on another day, or even demonstrating his love physically in ways that left you dizzy and unable to walk straight for days afterwards.

but this time felt different.

this time, it felt like his apology was more of an afterthought than a genuine act of remorse. it felt like he simply didn't care – as if your frustrations were utterly inconsequential to him.

before leaving for dinner, shit really hit the fan; heated words were exchanged at lightning speed through clenched teeth and narrowed eyes.

his defensive attitude made it apparent that he simply believed another quick apology would be enough to sweep his negligence under the rug.

as much as you tried to suppress it throughout the night, frustration eventually took over your usually sunlit demeanor.

somehow, both of you managed to plaster on fake smiles upon arriving at your parents' house, pretending that everything was fine between you.

every warm smile felt forced and every tender touch unnerved you.

you could barely bring yourself to look at him the whole night, and every time he tried to make a reassuring or affectionate gesture by holding your hand or wrapping his arm around you, you subtly but firmly rebuffed him.

by some miracle, your parents remained oblivious to the storm cloud hanging over the two of you.

somewhere deep down, you knew you couldn't simply let this go – not this time.

and so, this brings us to where you find yourself now – in the car with namjoon in the passenger seat as you both return home in silence.

the quiet is deafening, your demeanor frosty, and your eyes stubbornly focused on the road ahead, while namjoon's eyes occasionally dart towards you nervously. at red lights, your vision blurs as you stare resolutely at the world outside, acutely aware of his silent presence beside you.

namjoon, usually so adept at reconstructing bridges burned in anger and patching emotional wounds with well-timed humor, seemed at a loss for how to approach this situation.

this time, it appeared he couldn't simply laugh and charm himself out of this.

he exhales deeply, running a hand over his face. "i really am sorry-" he begins, but you cut him off, your voice barely containing the pain you felt.

"namjoon, please. i don't have the strength to listen to another one of your apologies..."

he blinks at you for a moment, wordless. his heart aches with guilt as he sees just how upset you are - more than he had ever seen before.

he opens his mouth as if to say something more but ultimately decides against it.

"i just want you to care, namjoon," you murmur through quivering lips, tears balancing perilously on the edge of your eyelashes. "that's all i want. am i asking for a lot?"

sudden honking from behind startles the both of you as the car behind you grew impatient with your delay at the green light.

with a jolt, you press on the accelerator, driving on towards home as fresh tears threaten to escape from your eyes, your throat growing increasingly tight with unshed emotion.

with a quiet sob firmly concealed behind clenched teeth, you bite your lip and try to focus on the road ahead – unsuccessfully fighting against a flood of fresh tears cascading down your face.

namjoon quickly averts his gaze, allowing it to wander aimlessly beyond the confines of the car, seeking solace in anything but the heart-wrenching sight of your sadness.

the elevator ride up to your apartment was filled with deafening silence - one where neither of you dared utter a single word as if doing so would shatter what little remained between you both.

as soon as the apartment door creaked open and you stepped inside, your resolve seemed to enter shaky territory.

for a brief moment, you stand still just inside the doorway, your clammy hands still clutching onto the keys.

your eyes follow namjoon as he takes several steps into the entrance. he removes his shoes and coat, seemingly on autopilot.

however, he soon pauses his actions and turns to face you, visibly aware of your eyes scrutinizing his every move.

"i think…" the words caught in your throat, "i think i'm going to spend the night at my place." your voice was barely audible, even to yourself.

namjoon's face registers surprise, and he stops in his tracks, eyes studying you intently for any sign that might reveal your thoughts.

after a brief pause, he moves to slip his coat back on again, his brows furrowing in concern.

"okay. i'll come with—"

"no, namjoon," you interrupt him firmly. despite the hitch in your voice barely rising above a whisper, there was no doubt how serious you were. he stops moving – his face reflecting his surprise and confusion.

namjoon has always been inseparable from you; there hasn't been a single night he has spent away from your side since you've been together.

"i could take the couch if that's..." namjoon starts again tentatively.

"just… let me have this space tonight. please."

his broad shoulders tense and he lets out a shaky sigh, turning his head away for a brief moment so that you wouldn't see the hurt that flickered across his eyes or the subtle gestures as his fingers came up discreetly to wipe at them.

he turns back to face you again and there's a vulnerability in his gaze – his normally confident exterior now replaced by feelings of insecurity and genuine fear at what this separation might mean.

as if propelled by instinct, namjoon crosses the distance between you both faster than you can react. he wraps you tenderly in a warm embrace, his arms enfolding your body against his firm chest.

his hand comes up to cradle the back of your head as if trying to protect you from the world or, perhaps, himself.

as you lean into him, the warmth of his body seems almost too much to bear – like walking on hot coals or holding fire in your hands – yet you know that it's exactly what you're yearning for.

his arms draw even tighter around you, and he lowers his head to press it lightly against your hair; the familiar scent of your shampoo wafting towards his nostrils.

he exhales tenderly before murmuring your name softly. with a voice strained by raw emotion, he whispers hoarsely, "i love you," allowing each precious syllable to crack the tiniest bit.

"and i'm sorry. i know i messed up. but please remember that i love you."

—

the drive back to your apartment is hazy, almost as if your body transported you there without any conscious effort from your mind.

your hands grip a duffel bag stuffed with essential toiletries and a few changes of clothes, enough to last a couple of days.

the thought of turning back and returning to namjoon crossed your mind multiple times. the lingering sensations of his arms wrapped around you were still so vivid; his heartbeat pounding against your chest felt as if it was still happening.

and as difficult as it was to admit, by the time you had managed to finally step through the door and leave the house, a part of you had already forgiven him.

when you unlock the door and step inside your old apartment, you notice that everything is exactly as you left it; eerily clean along with the darkness that envelops the space, the accompanying emptiness, and the lack of life within.

the emptiness is almost palpable, with a barren fridge and clean empty shelves serving as a stark reminder of the life you've temporarily left behind.

the only reminder of your presence in this apartment is the furniture that you bought brand new when you first moved in - before namjoon had ever asked you to live with him.

rather than feeling like home, your apartment appeared abandoned and forgotten; a place where no one had ever taken residence.

with a flick of a switch, dim light fills the living room casting shadows on the surrounding walls.

you stand there, rooted in the center of your living room, as a memory suddenly resurfaces:

you and namjoon had been dating for nearly nine months at the time. by then, both of you were comfortable enough with each other to spend nights together at each other’s homes; so much so that it almost seemed natural for your things to mingle together.

you were both sitting cross-legged on your couch together, warm cartons of chinese food cradled in your hands while letting a cheesy romantic comedy flicker across the tv screen on netflix – his selection no less.

the remnants of dinner were almost gone when namjoon ventured deep into the takeout bag and emerged triumphantly with two fortune cookies clasped tightly between his fingers.

handing one over to you, he flashed a warm and playful smile - the kind that seemed to make his dimples more prominent than ever.

"i'll open mine first," he declared confidently.

you watched him fondly as he eagerly cracked open the cookie, listening intently as he read aloud:

all things are difficult before they are easy.

he pondered the words for a brief moment, then, in true namjoon fashion, nodded to himself and adorably popped both halves of the cookie into his mouth.

reclining against the couch cushions, he gives you a playful wink and motions for you to proceed. "your turn," he mumbled through his self-satisfied grin.

you broke your own cookie, feeling the small slip of paper between your fingers, and your eyes raced across the message before they stopped dead.

the words printed there sent your stomach tumbling, your heart performing dizzying backflips inside of your chest:

your fortune: move in with me?

you glanced up at namjoon just in time to notice him observing you intently, a smug expression dancing across his face – it was clear he was enjoying the sight of your reaction.

"well?" he asked innocently, feigning ignorance as he leaned in closer to where you sat on the couch.

"what does it say?"

—

in a fit of frustration, you spin around, clutch your duffel bag tightly, and trudge towards your bedroom with heavy, slow steps.

pulling on your pajamas and brushing your teeth almost mechanically, you finally crawl into bed – but sleeping alone feels alien to you.

the chill of the empty sheets envelops you, and try as you might to shake it off, it's an uncomfortable sensation that clings to your skin. your heart grows heavier as blankets enshroud your shivering form in a futile attempt at comfort.

when morning arrives — or perhaps it's afternoon by now — you find yourself even more exhausted than before if that's possible.

the sunlight filtering through your curtains causes a strain on your groggy eyes as they slowly crack open.

with one arm stretched out from beneath the covers, you reach for your phone — clinging to a fragile hope that maybe, just maybe, namjoon had called or left a message while you were asleep. reality's cold slap stings as your screen is devoid of notifications.

although space was something you thought you wanted – needed even – it was never something that felt so crushing with its absence filled by namjoon.

groaning slightly, you sit up in bed and stretch before rising unsteadily on weary limbs.

coffee – that's what you need right now.

you were sure that you didn't have any cream though, but perhaps the bitterness of black coffee would suit your current mood; it's almost as if the scent of it was already lingering in the air.

you groggily shuffle down the hallway with bleary eyes. except for an odd denim jacket tossed on the counter, nothing seemed out of place.

your eyes widened at the jacket as you halted abruptly: buttoned cuffs, oversized, and slightly faded.

it was namjoon's.

your eyes quickly dart to the entrance, where a pair of shoes that couldn't possibly be yours were thrown carelessly next to the door.

your heart skips a beat as adrenaline momentarily jars you awake.

the sound of rustling emanates from the kitchen, and with bated breath, you walk towards it. cautiously, you approach and peek around the corner.

there stands namjoon with his broad back overshadowing everything else in view.

he's clad in a crisp white tank top, toned arms on display and muscles subtly rippling beneath the fabric. his back faces away from you as he appears wholly engaged in some task at hand.

you rub your tired eyes and squint, trying to recall whether yesterday's events were merely figments of your imagination or if they genuinely transpired.

you remember everything vividly: it really did happen.

absentmindedly perched on your kitchen counter are two mugs; namjoon smoothly fills each with coffee while he hums to himself.

what catches you off guard is the presence of your favorite hazelnut creamer next to the mugs - something he clearly must have picked up for you - as well as an all-too-familiar takeout bag from your favorite bagel shop.

the creamer— so delightful that on one occasion, you could have sworn you were hallucinating when you swung open the refrigerator door, only to find that namjoon had stocked it with multiple bottles. they were meticulously arranged in such a way that they occupied the majority of the uppermost shelf.

"so you won't have to worry anymore about running out too quickly," he had explained that day.

a mixture of emotions bubbles within; anger competes with relief, anxiety dances with affection.

you wanted this, didn't you? your secret desires brought to life with his unexpected presence, yet simultaneously neglecting the boundaries you had asked for.

it was difficult to deny how alluring he looks in that tank top, the very image of domestic perfection as he prepares your morning coffee and a fresh breakfast spread.

and then he turns around, clutching both mugs in his hands.

he freezes, seeming equally startled by your sudden presence – as if he wasn't expecting to be discovered just yet.

his lips quirk upwards in a hesitant, yet warm smile as his eyes take in the sight of you—sleepy, tousled hair, and the adorable pout that comes with a still-drowsy state. "good morning," he murmurs softly.

"hi."

the two of you stand there for a beat, the awkwardness of the situation settling like a thick blanket around you.

the question spills out of you without warning:

"how did you get in?"

he glances down at the coffee mugs still cradled within his grip, cautiously responding, "you always leave a spare at our place. i thought it would be nice to talk over breakfast."

your voice falters as you try to respond, but any words that might have come forth dissolve into the swelling lump forming in your throat. instead, you opt for a subtle nod before turning away and leading him towards your small balcony.

as you step outside, the bright morning sunlight makes you squint, still adjusting from having just woken up not too long ago.

you take a seat with namjoon at the small table on the balcony, silently munching on cream cheese-slathered bagels and sipping coffee, which slowly helps lift the fog of grogginess clouding your mind.

your eyes occasionally flicker towards namjoon, whose pensive gaze seems fixed on some far-away point in the distance.

a somber cloud seems to hang over him and a sinking feeling in your stomach tells you that he's here to bring an end to something.

"i fucked up yesterday,” he says, breaking the silence, “i know that.”

your head turns to look at him, saying nothing.

"i'm sorry," he begins softly. "i know i can't make it up to you now, but i genuinely am sorry."

namjoon's eyes remain locked on the same distant point as before, and as he continues to speak, they're filled with a profound sadness that seems almost unbearable for him.

his voice begins to tremble ever so slightly as he starts to explain himself further. "i've always been forgetful; it's among my most significant flaws. but i want you to know that it's never been out of carelessness when it comes to you. sometimes, my mind just gets overwhelmed."

he takes a deep breath, glancing at his hands before turning to look at you and adds, "i promise i'll do better; not just because i need to but because i love you. and the fact that i was in bed without you last night made me realize just how much i truly hate being apart from you."

pausing for a moment, he reluctantly allows his hand to hover over yours before gingerly placing it atop your own.

"i understand if it takes time for you to forgive me – i'm not asking for it right now," he admits quietly, his voice wavering slightly. "all i need is a chance to prove to you that i can change and be there for you when you need me."

namjoon then slowly removes his hand and looks away, giving you space to consider his words while fidgeting with the coffee mug handle.

you release a heavy sigh and look away too, trying your best to hold back tears. "oh, namjoon," you murmur, forcing a weak, watery chuckle.

this man, you think to yourself, will be the end of you. gently, you reach out and take his hand once more, interlacing your fingers with his.

"you cannot do that to me again."

in response, he turns his head to look at you once more - tears brimming in his eyes as they drink in every detail of your face. his expression softens with love and relief as he nods earnestly, "i won't. i promise."

holding namjoon's hand firmly in yours, you slowly stand up from the cozy, cushioned chair, beckoning him with a subtle nod of your head, signaling him to follow suit.

he rises from his seat, his tall figure towering over you as he instinctively stretches his arm wide, then gently pulls you into a tight and loving embrace.

his arms envelop you while his cheek tenderly rests on the top of your head. sighing contentedly, you nuzzle your face into the comforting fabric that covers his chest.

"namjoon," you quietly ask, snuggling deeper, "have you slept?" you can hear the slight rustle of fabric as he shakes his head.

"nope," he replies, his voice resonating through his chest.

he presses a tender kiss onto the top of your head before continuing, "you know i can't sleep without you." his words bring a smile to your face and a chuckle bubbles up within you.

"let's go back to bed, then."

you both walk back inside your apartment and into your bedroom where everything feels warmer than it did just yesterday: the bed that awaits you; the covers that promise to envelop the two of you in their cozy embrace; and namjoon himself, whose presence brings solace to your heart.

and as you lay down next to him and rest your head upon his chest, namjoon's heartbeat fills your ears—slower and steadier than it was the day before.

the sound is a soothing lullaby that leads you both to fall into a deep slumber, allowing you to sleep better than you have in what feels like an eternity.

[joon4eva]

dear god these letters from jimin and namjoon will be the death of me

[joon4eva]

Babes…’Home’!!!! Are you joking¿¿??? I didn’t need my delusion fed like that. It’s beautiful! I would send you flowers if I could. 🤍 I didn’t need to be down even worse for that man bc I’m still up set with all 7 of them and - 🥹

HAHAHA well hello (*^‿^*)

listen, i am VERY deep in delusion so i’m taking you ALL with me — we’re going down together >:D

but i’m glad you liked it! thank u for ur lovely message, it made my night ♡

[joon4eva]

home — kim namjoon.

summary: in a world of distractions and uncertainty, namjoon's only wish is simple yet profound: to always find his way back home—to you.

genre: established relationship / idol au ✰ fluff ✰ smut (18+ pls)

word count: ~5,804 words

tags/warnings: so much kissing, namjoon is so needy, kitchen sex, oral sex (f. receiving), unprotected sex, doggy-style position, voyeurism, creampie, aftercare, there's slight angst if you squint - oc confronts namjoon about his mental health but just straight up domestic as hell afterwards (pls give me)

masterlist :)

the moment the sun had risen, the day had felt incessantly long for namjoon.

the door to his apartment swings opens and he can't help but let out a tired sigh of relief.

he steps inside and quietly closes the door behind him, leaning against it and closing his eyes for a moment to catch his breath and soak in the warmth of being back home.

slowly lifting his heavy eyelids, he kicks off his shoes and shrugs off his coat before sluggishly making his way towards the inviting kitchen.

every step feels like a struggle as he deals with the splitting headache that's been plaguing him all day. it seems like anything that could have gone wrong this week did.

dance rehearsals had proved to be nothing short of disastrous. hobi had constantly been on namjoon's case about each little misstep; it felt as if there wasn't even a single moment of peace to be found.

things only seemed to get worse when namjoon retreated to his studio, only to endure a painful eight-hour session without managing to stitch together a single line of lyrics. every imaginable obstacle and setback had plagued him.

maybe the worst of all was how much he missed you. it had been more than a week since he last saw you properly – only catching glimpses of you in the mornings when you shared a quick kiss at breakfast or late at night when you were already asleep, and it only compounded the stress he was feeling.

namjoon nears the kitchen, but stops dead in his tracks - suddenly realizing how different his apartment seemed tonight.

his usually dim apartment is lit up with warm light that softly spills into every corner. there's soothing music emanating from the vinyl record player – playing an album that you'd bought together; and perhaps most strikingly, the most enticing smell dances tantalizingly through the air, coming from the kitchen.

a soft smile graces his lips when he takes in the sight of you, humming to yourself as you stir something on the stove.

between stirs, you take small, appreciative sips of wine from a glass resting on the nearby counter. you were also wearing that green floral sundress that he adored so much, the one that never failed to remind him of that first time he saw you in it.

—

he recalled sitting comfortably in the living room, engrossed in a book, when you shyly walked in wearing the new dress you had bought. the soft sound of your voice beckoned his attention, and as he lifted his gaze, his breath caught in his throat.

"what do you think?" you asked, giving a little twirl as you stood in front of him.

his eyes widened as he took in the sight before him: your figure beautifully framed by the mid-thigh length dress, a tempting side slit elongating your legs. the dress hugged your curves perfectly, emphasizing the swell of your breasts that filled the cups just right.

for a moment, he simply stared at you, rendered speechless by how absolutely stunning you looked.

worried that his silence meant he didn't approve, you looked down at floor and asked hesitantly, "do…do you not like it?"

snapping back to reality, namjoon tossed his book on the coffee table and swept you into his embrace, his arms enveloping you as he pulled you onto his lap.

his fingers gently cupped your chin, tilting your face upward to meet his gaze, the heat of your breath mingling as your noses brushed against each other. "i love it," he murmured against your lips.

his tongue darted out, moistening his lips before he pressed a teasingly damp kiss to the corner.

"really?" you asked breathlessly, anchoring yourself by clutching onto his broad shoulders.

"really," he hummed approvingly as his large hands slid beneath the fabric of your dress, cupping and squeezing your ass.

his lips tenderly planted soft kisses along your collarbone, trailing down to the curve of your breasts. guiding your hips forward, you could feel the growing hardness beneath namjoon's shorts brush deliciously against your clothed clit, eliciting a gasp from your lips.

before either of you knew it, your dress was bunched up at your waist, exposing your bare skin to the air as you sank down on his cock, feeling him divinely split you open. and with that same dress still on, he skillfully brought you to climax not once, but three times.

—

in swift, purposeful strides, namjoon closes the distance between you, his presence enveloping you from behind.

startled by his sudden arrival, your body tenses for a moment before recognizing the familiar touch. a soft sigh of relief escapes your lips, and you allow yourself to relax into his strong arms as they encircle you, embracing his solidity and warmth against your back.

his lips graze against the sensitive skin of your earlobe, imparting an enduring trace of warmth as he gently plants a swift yet tender kiss there. his breath, which is warm and welcoming, brushes against your ear as he whispers a soft greeting in a tone that is both low and smooth.

"hi," he murmurs with an almost seductive timbre.

you slowly turn within his hold, facing him directly, feeling his hands shift to find stability on the counter behind you. his fingers curl and tense slightly to accommodate his weight while effectively ensuring you remain close to him, trapped within his proximity.

"hi," you reply softly, feeling an uncontainable smile spread across your face.

namjoon's dark eyes drink in every detail of your appearance, unabashedly checking you out.

his gaze trails lingeringly over your chest for just a moment before finding its way back to meet your own eyes again. unable to contain yourself, you let out a soft giggle as you catch him in the act.

namjoon simply grins at your knowing expression before narrowing the already-minimal gap between you further.

closing that final distance between you both completely with a sweet yet short kiss pressed upon his pouted lips; namjoon offers an exaggerated look of disappointment in response to the briefness of the contact — only making you smile wider and ready to indulge him further.

"you could've lingered a little longer.”

"i didn't realize i was being timed," you retort playfully and press another feathery light kiss on the tip of his nose.

he chuckles softly at your words and leans down to lock his lips with yours again, this time deepening the kiss, as his arms wrap securely around you.

your own hands instinctively find their way to his broad shoulders and upwards to cradle his face.

namjoon breaks the kiss, breathing heavily, but continues to keep you close, his eyes searching yours for a confirmation of some unspoken question.

"i missed you," namjoon confesses, his tone genuine and vulnerable, as he unconsciously resumes pressing delicate kisses on your exposed neck and shoulder.

"i missed you too," you admit, biting your lip to hide a grin.

an appreciative hum escapes namjoon's lips as he pulls back just far enough to see your face again. he gives you a tender smile that manages to be both somber and radiant at once.

in an instant, however, the moment is interrupted by the sudden billowing of steam from a pot on the stove.

you part from his embrace to quickly stride over to the stovetop and move the pot to a different burner, shutting off the burner completely.

with deft movements, you grab a wooden spoon from the countertop and give the contents of the pot a swift stir, ensuring that nothing has scorched during your brief interlude.

namjoon watches you from a distance, a contented and endearing smile slowly spreading across his face as he observes your movements.

unable to resist any longer, namjoon saunters over to where you stand working at the stove. he quietly positions himself behind you once again and lovingly wraps his arms around your waist.

his fingers teasingly wander along your hips and thighs, tracing delicate patterns through the fabric of your dress and eliciting a mix of laughter and mild admonishment from you.

his nimble fingers begin their descent down your abdomen, teasingly grazing lower and lower until they flirt with the hem of your dress.

"namjoon…" you chastise him in a tone laden with feigned exasperation. "i'm trying to cook here," you continue while juggling between suppressing giggles and maintaining focus on the task at hand. he chuckles as his hands persist in their exploration, not deterred by your plea.

the warmth of namjoon's breath cascades onto your neck as he presses tender kisses upon your delicate skin.

as he presses his lips against a particular spot on your neck, he feels satisfaction when he hears a soft moan escape your mouth with pleasure that is undoubtedly amplified by the sensitive reaction your body is having to his touch. it seems as if your will has started to waver, causing namjoon to switch from gentle pecks to a firmer bite that leaves a mark.

"but i want you," he whispers into your ear. "let me have you, please."

the bulge in his pants is almost painfully obvious now, as he presses firmly against you. his longing is tangible in every word he utters.

just then, he deliberately sinks his teeth into a particularly sensitive spot on your neck and sucks on it softly, eliciting a moan that escapes your lips before you even realize it.

namjoon's hands slip under the hem of your dress and graze dangerously close to your panties. his fingers slowly make contact with your clothed heat, and every muscle in your body momentarily seizes up as a small gasp escapes your lips. the unexpected sensation prompts your head to drop back onto his sturdy shoulder, struggling to suppress another moan.

"can i?" he inquires voice barely audible, awaiting your consent.

in that instant, one thing becomes abundantly clear: the dinner simmering on the stove is no longer the priority.

you quickly place a lid on the pot before spinning around within namjoon's arms. your eyes lock onto his for a moment before you press your lips against his in a fervent kiss. your arms wrap around him tightly, pulling him closer to you.

the low groan that emanates from namjoon sends a jolt through your body; with a swiftness borne from urgency, his hands deftly sweep down to find purchase on the backs of your thighs - hoisting you up with ease and enticing your legs to encircle his waist.

namjoon's steady strides carry both of you across the kitchen floor until he gently positions you atop the cool countertop situated on the opposite side of the island.

desperation flares wildly within both of you as you tangle together, hands urgently tugging and pulling, craving more skin-on-skin contact. it feels like forever since you were able to feel namjoon like this. fingers glide along your waist, caress the swell of your breasts, and trace the contours of your hips. your back arches, seeking more of his touch, as he maps every inch of you with his hands and lips.

your hands find their way to the hem of namjoon's shirt, lifting it up and over his head before discarding it onto the kitchen floor. his hands respond in kind, roughly lowering the straps of your dress and helping you shimmy out of it until it too joins the growing pile on the floor.

with heightened anticipation growing within both of you, namjoon guides hot and wet kisses fervently along your body.

his steady hands nudge you gently to lean back against the cold countertop, the stark contrast of temperatures sending a shiver up your spine.

moans of pleasure escape your lips as his passionate kisses trail increasingly closer to your sensitive core, teasingly delivering tender bites here and there as he continues his descent.

your wetness has managed to seep through the delicate fabric of your panties, prompting you to bite your lip in anticipation.

a long, lingering kiss lands on your clothed clit, causing your hips to involuntarily jolt forward, a moan escaping your parted lips. a soft chuckle follows from him at this observation.

"so sensitive," he hums in appreciation.

his lips press against the delicate bundle of nerves again, his nose playfully nudging your clit, eliciting a desperate huff from you.

growing more eager by the moment, you call out his name—your voice thick with longing and desire.

namjoon's fingers delicately dip under the lace waistband, painstakingly drawing down the fabric until finally casting it onto the floor with your dress, leaving you in just a lace bra. the soft glow radiating from the kitchen lights causes your glistening core to shimmer enticingly, drawing him ever closer.

namjoon proceeds to press one more adoring kiss upon the delicate skin lining the inside of your thigh.

gently, he guides his tongue from your entrance up to your clit, fully embracing it with his warm mouth as he expertly sucks and swirls. your moans flow without restraint, your fingers instinctively reaching to tangle themselves in his soft hair, while namjoon holds onto your hips with a steady grip, keeping you in place.

his position between your thighs grants him a front-row seat to the most stunning view of your face — the adorable way your features scrunch up and the parted lips emitting those sweet sounds he adores so much.

he plunges a finger inside of you, watching as your eyes flutter close and a drawn-out moan escapes from your lips.

he lifts his head, with traces of your arousal on his chin and nose. his voice floats up to tease you even more, "feels good, doesn't it?"

it's a question that doesn't really need an answer; it's clear just by looking at you. however, he asks it anyway – perhaps to coax a response from you – or simply to hear you say it.

biting your lip to suppress further cries of delight, you can only nod eagerly in response. a slight frown forms on namjoon's face; he wants to hear you say it.

"say it," he insists softly but firmly. the sensation overwhelms you as he adds another finger, stretching and filling you completely.

you can feel tears well up in your eyes as waves of pure pleasure course through every nerve ending and surge like distant tides toward their unrelenting climax.

clutching onto namjoon's hair and grinding your hips against his mouth, you manage to nod eagerly and stutter out through gasps and moans, "y-yes, baby. oh, god, it feels s-… so good."

namjoon smiles affectionately at your submission; pleased by your response.

"good girl," he murmurs softly before returning to his fervent actions.

his mouth dives between your thighs again — working as if he were a starving man finally eating for the first time in weeks. his fingers move skillfully inside you, delicately curving and thrusting while his lips and tongue work in sync, lapping at your sensitive clit with perfectly timed flicks and gentle suction.

the sensation becomes all-encompassing as your body finally succumbs to the intensity of the orgasm that rips through you, the tremors and shivers rippling through your body and leaving you gasping for breath.

namjoon gradually eases the pace of his movements.

he releases a soft hum of satisfaction as he tenderly cleans you up with feathery licks at your slit, each gentle touch causing you to whimper from the lingering oversensitivity.

slowly raising his head from between your thighs, namjoon peppers tender kisses along the sensitive skin of your inner thighs. his lips continue upward until they reach your abdomen, where he plants more sweet kisses. then, with a gentle hold on your arms, he helps you sit up on the countertop.

you eagerly wrap your legs around his waist, simultaneously drawing his face to yours with your hands as you reel him in for a hungry, open-mouthed kiss. your tongue ventures into his welcoming mouth, keen on tasting yourself on his lips.

he wraps his strong arms around you, his hands making their way up to tangle in your hair. with a gentle tug, he pulls your head back slightly, causing a moan to escape your lips as he leaves a trail of soft kisses along your neck. he applies a little pressure, causing your head to tilt back as you sigh in delight.

suddenly and without warning, namjoon firmly grips your thighs and slides you off the counter. he hoists you up, cradling your naked body against his waist and carries you with long strides toward the bedroom.

"wait! wait, my wine!" you exclaim with a giggle.

namjoon pulls back slightly and chuckles in disbelief, "honey, can't it wait?" you pout playfully at him and he lets out a mock sigh of exasperation before turning back towards the kitchen island.

careful not to drop you, he retraces his steps to the other side of the kitchen island so that you can reach for your wine glass.

both of you laugh as namjoon turns back around to his bedroom and nearly sprints down the hallway, narrowly avoiding spilling your drink on the floor or bumping into any furniture.

upon reaching the bedroom door, he gently sets you down on the bed as you lounge back.

you're holding onto your half-full wine glass, and you prop yourself up on your elbow, taking in the sight of namjoon as he eagerly unbuckles his belt.

he slides down his pants and boxers in one smooth motion, his throbbing length slapping against his abdomen.

as you watch him, you hold onto the wine glass in one hand while using the other to unclasp your bra.

you toss the discarded lingerie onto the floor and watch as namjoon's eyes follow its descent before locking onto you once more.

he moves forward on sturdy legs, his knees finally meeting the soft mattress as he positions himself over you. his fingers find the rim of your glass, plucking it from your hand as he chuckles softly, "i've definitely earned some of this."

with that, he drains the remaining liquid in two large gulps before wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and setting the glass down on the nearby nightstand.

leaning back towards you, namjoon braces himself with both hands on either side of your body as he inches closer to you, gently trapping you beneath him.

his hand gently brushes over your body before landing on your breast. his mouth follows the path established by his hands; landing on a nipple and taking it between his lips, drawing out a mixture of pleasure and restrained moans from deep within you. your hands entangle in his hair as your hips instinctively press up against him in search of friction, feeling a familiar heat begin to pool between your legs again.

namjoon presses his lips fervently against yours, enveloping you in a passionate kiss full of heat and the intoxicating taste of wine.

your mouths open and close, nibble and devour. the space between your lips and his is briefly empty as namjoon pulls away, only to widen as your gaze shifts downwards.

with hesitation slipping away like sand through fingers, you reach out to take him in your grasp, coating your fingers with the pre-cum already gathering at the tip before you start stroking ever so gently. his forehead comes to rest against yours as he allows a low moan to escape his lips, his hips subtly shifting in response to your touch.

foreheads touching and breath mingling, you suggest, "let me suck you off."

caught off guard by the proposal, he stammers out a refusal.

"n-no," namjoon protests, shaking his head, his breath hot on your skin. "i won't last."

"well, that's the point, isn't it?" determined to tease him further, you tighten your grip and intentionally slow down your strokes on his engorged cock. namjoon's breath catches in his throat as his large hand envelops yours to cease your movement.

and in a sudden burst of energy, he skillfully repositions you on the bed. your legs are bent, and your hips are lifted, while your face presses gently into the soft pillow. a delightful gasp escapes your lips as your cheek comes in contact with the plush cushion, and you're intensely aware of the warmth growing between your legs as it begins to trail down your thighs.

namjoon takes a moment to appreciate the sight before him, letting out a contented exhale at the view of your body perfectly positioned. an alluring flush washes over you; fully aware you must look every bit like a porn star, since you had carefully prepared for this moment knowing namjoon would be home early. but you didn't expect to find yourself so eagerly sprawled out on his bed before dinner.

his fingers gently explore the globes of your ass before finding their way to your slick folds below. with the pads of his fingers, he reaches under you to tease your clit with deliberate motions, drawing a moan from deep within you as it's muffled by the pillow.

"god, baby… how can you be this wet already?" he marvels, a surprised chuckle arising from him.

you whimper in response, the pillows clenched tightly within your grip. "please, namjoon," comes the desperate plea from between clenched teeth. "i've been waiting for this all day."

namjoon gently leans over you, planting your bare back with dozens of tiny kisses, traversing a path along your spine. as his lips trail upward towards your earlobe, his warm breath tickles your ear as he whispers, "turn your head to the left."

following his instruction, your eyes meet the reflection of both you and namjoon in a strategically placed mirror.

you take in the ravenous image of yourself: wide-eyed and framed by tousled hair resting on soft pillows, your back curved and breasts firmly pressed against the mattress beneath you.

"keep those beautiful eyes on the mirror."

with bated breath, you watch as he positions himself at your entrance, the head of his throbbing cock teasingly grazing your slick folds.

as he slowly pushes inside you, a sharp gasp escapes your lips, your senses overwhelmed by the exquisite sensation of him stretching you open, filling you inch by inch, causing you to instinctively clench around the delicious intrusion.

"think you can do that for me, baby?" he teases, his voice a velvet rasp, as he buries himself deeper.

you nod eagerly in response, unable—or perhaps unwilling— to look away as his fingers entwine themselves within yours.

"pretty baby," he coos, meeting your eyes in the mirror. "already so fucked she can’t speak."

your breath catches in your throat, and you almost struggle to keep your eyes open – it feels like blissful exhaustion is starting to set in.

you can feel his cock drag out, teasing you with a fleeting emptiness, before he slams back in with a force that leaves you gasping for breath.

stray strands of hair cling to your damp skin as droplets of sweat escape from under you. it's almost shameful how wanton you appear—your lips parting as droplets of saliva threaten to dribble out with each labored breath.

"please," you manage to whisper between breaths, "harder."

without hesitation, his grip on your hands tighten as he quickens his pace and intensity at once.

with every forceful motion back and forth, the headboard rocks vigorously against the wall; probably loud enough for the neighbors to hear at this point.

“o-oh my god,” you let out a shuddering gasp through another moan, beginning to move your hips back to meet namjoon's rhythm. "i'm going to… i'm going to cum again," you stammer breathlessly.

you can feel his control slipping, his movements growing more urgent, more desperate, mirroring the frenzy building within you. his hands clamp onto your hips, holding you tightly - so tight that you're certain there will be marks later.

"inside, namjoon. come inside!" you mewl through muffled sobs into the sheets.

namjoon's movements falter, eyes widening from above at your request. you can tell he's more than willing to give you what you want.

"f-fuck, baby. inside? are… you sure?"

"i need it! please," you beg through gasping breaths, tears now starting to gather at the corners of your eyes.

he curses through gritted teeth under his breath and moans in response, tightening his grip on your hips.

unable to restrain yourself any longer, a sob escapes your lips as the climax rushes through you like a crashing wave of rapture.

this time feels even more intense than before, moaning and gasping uncontrollably as your inner walls clench tightly around namjoon's pulsating cock, coating it with your warm, slick arousal.

it's not long before namjoon's thrusts become erratic; eventually his hips still as he releases himself inside of you, repeating your name like a mantra while feeling his cock pulse deep inside of you.

as his frenzied movements gradually slow and your knees slightly give out, namjoon collapses on top of your back - still buried deep inside you.

you can feel his breath on your skin as it comes in steady gasps trying to catch up with his racing heart. he shifts, letting his hands come to rest on both sides of your body as he supports his exhausted weight.

a satisfied sigh escapes your lips as you feel the warm trickle of his cum escape your core, moistening the sheets beneath you.

your gaze remains fixed on the mirror to your left, allowing you a clear view of your naked body cushioned by plush pillows and namjoon's long, fit frame sprawled protectively across your own.

his hair is adorably disheveled, slightly obscuring his eyes. as your eyes lock with his through the reflection in the mirror, a slow smile stretches across his face.

with a nonchalant flick of his fingers, he brushes his hair out of his eyes before offering you a flirtatious wink, causing giggles to bubble up from both of you. the otherwise quiet room is dimly lit and filled only with the sound of your shared breathing.

raising himself onto one elbow, he tenderly kisses the back of your head before murmuring, "hang on; i'll be back."

he carefully slides out of you, eliciting a slight wince from you at the sudden sensation of emptiness. adjusting your position on the bed, you lean onto your side and wait for him to return.

moments later, namjoon reappears with a damp towel draped over one arm, a water bottle in hand, and an open bag of his favorite snack tucked between his teeth.

naked and unabashed, he sets down the water on the nightstand and sits beside you on the bed.

wordlessly, he offers you the bag; with a smile, you accept it and pop a chip into your mouth.

intently, he watches your enjoyment with an affectionate half-dimpled smile, pressing a tender kiss to your knee while you settle comfortably.

namjoon adjusts his position and gently taps the side of your leg as a signal for you to open them. with the warm damp cloth in hand, his muscles flex as he carefully cleans you up; the warmth of the fabric elicits a sigh of contentment from you.

deciding to break the comfortable silence, you ask with slight hesitation, "so… how was your day today?"

deep down, you already knew the answer..

the truth is: you knew namjoon was having a hard time at work lately.

you meant to bring it up sooner, really. but you didn't know how to do it without coming across as intrusive or nosy.

after all, namjoon gets enough scrutiny in his life as a musician; the last thing you wanted to do was add to that by being a nagging girlfriend.

at first, you noticed he was coming home from work later than usual. this made you somewhat apprehensive at first – you didn't want to jump to any conclusions about what he might be doing instead of working – but he'd never given you any reason to doubt him. you trusted him.

you also noticed a lot of the times he appeared restless during the rare periods he was at home, often times incoherently mumbling in his sleep or tapping his foot nervously at the table as he stared blankly off into space.

one night, at around 3am, you instinctively reached out to namjoon's side of the bed only to find it empty.

sitting up in the dark, your heart raced frantically trying to come up with an idea as to where the hell he was at this hour.

quietly slipping out of the bedroom and into the hallway, you were moments away from imagining the worst when your eyes caught a faint glow emanating from under the door of his home studio.

pressing your ear to the door, you could just make out the gentle hum of music coming from within. he was still working.

despite all of this, you chose to keep your concerns to yourself for a while longer. but after nine days of hardly seeing him, you knew that eventually, the conversation had to happen.

"it was good," namjoon answers softly, not meeting your eyes as he finishes wiping you off.

he stands up, disposing of the used cloth in a nearby laundry hamper.

"okay," you say gently, "now give me the real answer."

you watch him closely from your comfortable position in bed as he opens a nearby closet door with a quiet sigh.

he reaches up to take out a stack of fresh, neatly folded sheets and carefully closes the door behind him.

as namjoon walks back to the bed, his eyes finally meet yours, and he stands at the foot of the bed with the sheets still cradled in his arms.

"i don't know what you mean," he says defensively.

you roll your eyes, feigning annoyance as you huff, "okay. well, i'm not moving until you tell me."

namjoon's brow furrows in concern for a moment before he tries to change the subject. "do you need help going to the bathr—" he begins, but you cut him off with a quick "nope" and a slow shake of your head, crossing your arms firmly over your chest.

he exhales, glancing up at the ceiling before setting the clean sheets down at the foot of the bed. sitting next to you, he gently places a comforting hand on your leg.

you give him a moment as he traces soft circles on your skin, his eyes searching for the right words to say.

"i'm sorry," he finally begins. your body stiffens, caught off guard by his response. you really weren't expecting an apology.

"i haven't been a very good boyfriend lately," he admits, his smile strained and sadness evident in his eyes.

"and none of that is your fault. i'm sorry," he repeats, his gaze lowering in shame.

blinking back a sudden wave of tears, you sit up slightly and cover his large hand with yours, weaving your fingers together.

"namjoon, what on earth are you talking about?"

he looks up at you, mouth open to respond before you interrupt, "you're such a good boyfriend. the best, actually. i've just been worried about you lately. i can tell you've been pushing yourself.”

namjoon looks down at your hands and then back up into your eyes. you can almost see the gears turning in his head.

"i want to be here for you when things get tough. we should be able to talk about anything together."

a silent beat passes before he nods in agreement, squeezing your hand gently.

he then lifts your entwined fingers up to his lips and plants a tender kiss to your knuckle. "yeah," he breathes out, "it's been really hard. and you're…"

he exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair as he searches for the right words once more.

"you're so normal. you make me feel normal, even when my life is anything but. it's so complicated already; i just don't want to burden you with that."

his voice wavers slightly as he swallows, avoiding eye contact.

"joon," you say softly, trying to make him look at you again. "you could never be a burden to me. that's something you should never worry about."

as his eyes finally meet yours, they glisten with an array of emotions—appreciation, love, and relief all present.

he gazes at you adoringly and nods in response, uttering a soft "okay."

unable to resist the urge any longer, you lean forward and cup his face tenderly with your hands, planting a sweet, delicate peck right on his lips. the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips is soothing, even though your heart races within your chest.

you start to pull away but feel namjoon's strong hands dart up to grab your face as he draws you back into a deeper, more passionate kiss, both of you giggling against each other's mouths.

your hands slide up to namjoon's neck and weave themselves into his thick hair, nails softly grazing his scalp with just the right amount of force to elicit a delightful sigh.

sensing an invitation, his tongue tentatively ventures out to glide alongside yours, mingling the warmth between you.

namjoon momentarily adjusts his teeth on your bottom lip, gently sinking down on your bottom lip before releasing it with a subtle pop and eliciting an involuntary moan from deep within your throat.

you sense him shifting his position on the bed, eventually hovering over you as if preparing to dominate you but breaking the kiss instead.

without warning, namjoon wraps one arm around your lower back while grabbing your thighs with his other hand. in a swift upward motion, he lifts and hoists your naked body on his waist, coaxing you to wrap your legs around him for support.

you gasp, instinctively holding on tighter, feeling the thrill mingle with fear as you wrap your arms tightly around his torso.

"namjoon!" you exclaim mid-laughter, feeling both exhilarated and slightly turned on at being tossed around so effortlessly.

his strong hands now shift from the back of your thighs to support you by cupping the curves of your ass.

with bold strides and a gleeful grin, he carries you like this toward the bathroom, depositing you gently onto the cool surface of the countertop.

standing between your parted thighs, he leans in close again— this time offering you a burning, fervent kiss that is so hot and heavy, quickly rendering you dizzy as butterflies wildly flutter within your stomach.

eventually namjoon pulls back to examine your face, bringing his thumb up to gently caress your swollen bottom lip as a cheeky grin threatens to break through his solemn demeanor.

his eyes twinkle mischievously, reflecting the lustful haze that clouds your vision.

"shower?"

[joon4eva]

⌒⠀ִ     ♡  LUNA. 20’s . she/her ✰ ao3 ✰ most of my works are only suitable for mature audiences. minors dni.

© joon4eva 2023; please do not repost, copy, translate, modify, or steal any of my work.

f: fluff ✰ s: smut ✰ a: angst

DRABBLES

forever? ✰ (f) one-shot ; strangers to lovers au ; 1.6k › in which you meet kim namjoon at a wedding.

5 + 1 ✰ (f, a, s) one-shot ; established relationship au ; 3.2k › OR, five times you wanted to tell Namjoon you loved him + the one time you finally did.

closer ✰ (s,f) one-shot ; established relationship au ; 4.1k › waking up to namjoon after he comes back from tour.

home ✰ (s, f) one-shot ; established relationship / idol au ; 5.8k › in a world of distractions and uncertainty, namjoon's only wish is simple yet profound: to always find his way back home—to you.

forg_tful ✰ (a, f) one-shot ; established relationship ; 3.4k › where namjoon's forgetfulness gets him into trouble.

drunk in love ✰ (f) one-shot ; friends-to-lovers au; 2.5k › you and whiskey are never a good combination. or: you’ve been in love with your best friend for years and you might tell him about it while drunk.

just the tip? ✰ (s) (LATEST) one-shot ; established relationship au; 3.9k › you and namjoon are left alone together a little too long. or: in your childhood home, you learn just how much is really "just the tip" with namjoon.

[joon4eva]

5+1 — kim namjoon.

OR, five times you wanted to tell Namjoon you loved him + the one time you finally did.

genre. established relationship ✰ fluff, smut (18+), slight angst

word count. ~3214 words

tags. oc pretty much takes forever to tell namjoon that she loves him back; oral sex (m. receiving); unprotected sex; cowgirl position; namjoon is whipped but so is oc; oc quit being so damn dramatic

it's been exactly forty-six days since namjoon told you he loved you. you can feel your chest tightening at the memory.

the first time he had said it, his eyes shimmered with emotion as he gazed at you confidently.

he didn't pressure you into saying it back, but that didn't make the decision any easier for you. he assured you multiple times that he wasn't expecting you to reciprocate instantly; he merely wanted you to know how he felt.

in the past, you had been hurt by people you'd trusted, and the thought of baring your soul again was terrifying. namjoon was well aware of this.

love had always been a double-edged sword for you. it was a word that carried immense weight, tangled with past hurts and disappointments.

the memory of how he looked when he had first told you always replays in your mind.

so sure, so genuine.

his eyes spoke worlds of sincerity, and you wished you could find that same strength.

because it was true; you did care about him —no— you loved him.

but opening yourself up to love again meant exposing your vulnerability, risking the possibility of being hurt once more. the challenge now was finding the right moment – and the strength – to tell him. it has become obsessively frustrating.

in the quiet corners of your heart, there were five distinct moments when you desperately wanted to tell him you loved him:

the first time came just a week after he told you he loved you. it was pouring with rain– cold droplets slamming against your skin – and namjoon went out of his way to walk you home under the shelter of his umbrella despite living in the complete opposite direction.

despite this and despite your protests, he insisted. with his umbrella firmly held above both your heads, his gentle smile warmed your heart as water dripped down onto his jacket's collar, soaking him through while trying to protect you from getting wet.

namjoon grinned through raindrops clinging to his face, casting a sidelong glance at you before reassuring you, "it's a great excuse to spend more time together." heavens knew how easily that brief twinkle of adoration in his eyes could have coaxed the confession from you then and there.

the second time was an early morning when namjoon knew he would not see or talk to you throughout the day since his busy work schedule kept him occupied. as you groggily rubbed sleep from your eyes and checked your phone, there was a message from him:

joon ♡ : don't forget breakfast! it's cold outside so enjoy something warm :) i'll be thinking of you. love, joon.

attached was a cute selfie of him pouting while holding up a piece of toast as if to say, "see? i'm eating. you should too."

the text glowed on your phone screen in the early light of dawn, filling you with warmth as if it could chase away any lingering remnants of sleep.

one morning while preparing for work, you find namjoon sitting in your shared living room, quietly reading a book as sunlight filtered through the curtains.

as you slipped on your coat, tugging uncomfortably at the unfamiliar fabric under his watchful gaze, his attention shifted subtly from the novel's pages to rest upon you. a small yet meaningful smile graced his face while he studied you intently.

feeling both shy and slightly self-conscious with the weight of his eyes on you, you glanced at him and then away. "i'll be back later in the evening," you announced, the words spilling out in a rush. "and i'll bring dinner."

his response was simple: "okay. love you."

and then that familiar dimpled grin of his emerged as he returned to his book and the chapter awaiting him - almost like it was just another routine sentence to say every day.

you're left rooted in place, a momentary shock at hearing those words pass again so casually between his lips dulling your movements.

panic quickly set in as the need to get to work on time surged through you; without another word exchanged between the two of you—no acknowledging glance or reassuring smile—you hurried out flustered. the tears welled up in your eyes while frustration overtook you.

on the third instance, it was his birthday, and you had prepared a surprise for him.

you had spent hours planning the perfect day filled with small surprises and thoughtful gestures tailored just for him. from his favorite breakfast waiting for him in bed when he woke up to the neatly wrapped presents and handwritten notes hidden around his apartment—every detail had been meticulously planned.

with each note he read aloud and every sparkling tear that touched his cheek, your heart threatened to burst from your chest.

but as he pressed his lips to yours and pulled you close for a tender embrace, fear tightened its grip on your voice. the vulnerability that love demanded felt overwhelming, and you hesitated, grappling with the desire to pour your heart out and the fear of baring your soul.

so, instead of speaking the words that danced upon your tongue, you tightened your embrace, burying your face in the crook of his neck.

the fourth time came after a dinner party with some of your closest friends.

namjoon had looked incredibly charming and every bit like the perfect boyfriend. he was dressed in a crisp white button-down shirt, paired with dark trousers that hugged his toned legs perfectly.

he was the epitome of a gentleman throughout the evening, consistently attentive to your needs.

he held doors open for you, maintained eye contact when you both conversed, and even shared bites of dessert with you using the same spoon.

as mundane as this would sound to other people, this was all just new to you.

namjoon also took several opportunities to compliment you in front of your friends and found subtle ways to touch you affectionately while he talked to your friends – holding your hand or ever-so-gently running his hand along your thigh beneath the table, his caressing fingers gradually moving upward before retracing their path all the way down.

his presence made your heart race all night long, but it was his occasional teasing touch inching dangerously up and down your leg that drove you to the edge.

as soon as both of you got to his apartment, namjoon had barely begun speaking when you pushed him back against the wall and pressed your lips onto his. the raw need in your eyes said more than any words could.

"can't… can't take it anymore," you stammered between kisses.

he was caught off guard and managed to stutter out, "w-what has gotten into you?" as you peppered a trail of wet kisses all over the column of his neck. his eyes were wide and dazed, a swirling combination of disbelief and lust.

"there's something i need," you murmured against his lips as your hands fumbled with his belt buckle.

with namjoon's pants bunched around his ankles and his back pressed against the door, you eagerly dropped to your knees while looking up at him – locking eyes and taking him into your mouth as he gasped softly in response. his appreciative moans served as music to your ears as you bobbed up and down; they grew louder once he tangled his fingers into your hair.

"don't stop," he breathed out shakily, reaching climax and releasing every ounce of his cum into your mouth, which you entirely swallowed.

breathlessly, namjoon allowed himself to be practically dragged by you towards his bed where he laid back against the headboard. his clothes now discarded on the bedroom floor along with yours; only illuminated by dim moonlight filtering through the curtains, you straddled his hips and sunk down on his cock, moaning his name loudly as you felt every ridge and every inch of him deliciously stretch you open. your hips bounced diligently and relentlessly, and you willed yourself to push past the fiery sensation building in your thighs.

the dazed look in namjoon's eyes as he watched you was a sight forever burned into your memory — his hands moving to guide your hips in a steady rhythm as he kept his back pressed against the headboard for support, beads of sweat glistening on his forehead as they trailed down his face and neck. his moans filled the room – sometimes soft and breathy, at other times deep and guttural – intermingled with throaty curses.

afterward, exhausted and sated, you collapsed onto namjoon's chest, feeling the warmth and strength in his embrace as he gently stroked your hair.

the silence was broken by namjoon's breathy exhale as he uttered a quiet, "wow," coaxing giggles out of both of you.

you raised your head to look up at him, pressing a tender kiss onto the corner of his lips, following it with a deeper one right on his mouth.

his hands continued their soothing journey along your back, fingers caressing the delicate skin while gazing at you with a hazy post-orgasmic expression.

"everything okay? we barely made it through the door after dinner before you dragged me into the bedroom," he asked gently, drawing laughter from you.

as you traced circles along his cheek with a delicate finger, all you could muster in reply was, "nothing, i just… appreciate you. a lot." flashing him a coy smile, you added, "and also…you just looked really hot at dinner."

with a chuckle, namjoon squeezed your side and pulled you closer to wrap his arms around you tightly, as if to make sure you wouldn't slip away from him for even a moment. his hand slipped from your back, traveling up to cup the side of your face.

"for what it's worth," he murmured sincerely, "i appreciate you just as much – if not more."

as both of your breathing slowed and synchronized with each other's heartbeat, it was then that the words almost tumbled from your lips – just how much you truly loved him too.

and though you didn't say it out loud, somehow, in that moment, namjoon seemed to understand.

the fifth moment unfolded late one night when out of nowhere, namjoon showed up at your door at 2 a.m., pleading for you to go eat together. he insisted his sudden burger craving could not wait until morning. with an irresistible grin on his face, he managed to convince a grumbling, half-asleep you to join him to satisfy his hunger pangs.

so there you were, parked in an empty lot eating burgers together. you could never say no to namjoon.

as you both sat in your car, the atmosphere was light and easy. the image of him eating so nonchalantly in his adorable cartoon pajamas still brings a smile to your face – his large frame somehow looking small and innocent inside your car. you bickered playfully about the merits of dipping fries in ketchup versus mayonnaise.

"oh come on! ketchup is way better with fries!" namjoon exclaimed between bites.

he flashed a cheeky grin at you as he continued eating.

then, as if to prove a point, he dipped an already ketchup-soaked fry into even more ketchup - only to miss his mouth entirely. the bright red condiment smeared on the corner of his lip.

the look of determination on his face quickly dissolved into confusion.

biting back a grin, you reached across the console to wipe off the ketchup with your finger.

"can't take you anywhere," you murmured, before popping your finger into your mouth, savoring the tangy taste as you raised one eyebrow.

his eyes widened in surprise, his mouth full of burger, and then, in one spontaneous movement, he leaned across the center console to plant a greasy kiss on your cheek.

"namjoon!" you squealed, feigning annoyance as laughter bubbled up in your chest. "now i have burger grease on my face!"

it was in that moment – as namjoon flashed one of those smiles that could have outshone the moon itself – when you felt the words right there on the tip of your tongue until a familiar anxiety held them back.

—

it was a chilly evening when work schedules had kept you apart for over a week. after much tip-toeing, you decided this was the night you were going to tell him.

you picked up your phone and dialed namjoon's number, hoping to hear his voice and perhaps even see him that night.

to your dismay, he failed to answer both your calls and texts.

worried that something was wrong and missing him dearly, you slipped into your shoes and donned a warm jacket before making your way to the front of the building where he worked.

standing outside his building, waiting impatiently while shivering in the freezing air, your anticipation grew as time turned sluggish.

and when he finally appeared, your heart skipped a beat, only to plummet moments later.

when he finally emerged from behind those doors, it felt like everything was happening in slow motion – your eyes locked on him as he exited, but much to your surprise, he was not alone.

walking beside him was another woman.

their camaraderie appeared innocent enough – perhaps she was just a coworker – but then she lightly touches his arm and laughs at something he said.

namjoon's hands are both shoved into his pockets as they pause near entrance to continue their conversation.

your heart sank as the woman pulled out her phone, leaning in to eagerly show something to namjoon, who couldn't help but coo at whatever it was. you stand there rooted in place as jealousy, like a ferocious wildfire, seared through your veins, igniting an inexplicable rage.

eventually the conversation ends and they part ways. namjoon's gaze shifts, eyes landing on you as he spots you standing there stiffly.

oblivious to your internal conflict, his face lights up with a surprised grin as he strides towards you, visibly puzzled to find you there yet eager to close the gap between you.

with tears threatening to spill from your eyes, you abruptly turn away and begin to walk home, attempting to shield your burgeoning feelings.

it was all irrational, really.

namjoon never gave you a reason to not trust him.

but you suddenly felt like you were somehow destined to re-live the same thing over again; the distance, the secrecy, the lying–even though namjoon himself has never done anything like this during your entire relationship.

would this mark the beginning? it scared the shit out of you.

you could hear him call your name, confusion lacing his voice. with no sign of stopping and keeping your distance, namjoon went from a stroll to a sprint, frantically trying to reach you.

his calls grew louder and more frantic, and the sound of his footsteps closing the distance sent your heart racing further.

he finally caught up and gently wrapped his arms around your trembling frame along with yours around his waist.

"what's wrong?" he panted breathlessly. "why are you out here in the cold? why are you crying?"

gasping for air and choking on tears that now freely flowed down your cheeks, you managed to stammer out: "i… i called you, and you didn't answer… i missed you, and i came to see you, but then i saw you with–" the words spilled out between gasps for air, your voice quivering.

namjoon's eyes widened with disbelief and understanding, as he realized the true cause of your distress. his reaction was one of tender empathy; immediately drawing you into a tight and warm hug.

his touch felt both comforting and reassuring as his hand cradled the back of your head, his voice filled with tenderness.

"oh, my love, i'm so sorry. i didn't mean to worry you."

you clung to him fiercely, as if he'd vanish if you let go; your every tear searing his shoulder like acid.

"don't worry," namjoon reassured gently while still holding you in his arms. "she's my colleague... and she’s actually gay. she just wanted to show me pictures of her baby who was born recently. it was nothing more than that."

you softly gasped, feeling foolish for jumping to conclusions. you blubbered out an apology, retreating back into his chest as a fresh wave of sobs broke through. "i…i'm so sorry… i shouldn't have thought like that…"

namjoon rocked you both soothingly in his arms. "it's okay," he reassured, rubbing his large hand up and down your back soothingly. "we all make mistakes; it's all okay."

slowly pulling back just enough to look into your eyes, namjoon cradles your face in his hands – his touch warm and gentle.

with care, he wipes away the remnants of your tears with his thumbs. as your sobs subside and are replaced by soft hiccups, namjoon's warm breath brushes against your forehead before he presses a tender kiss onto it.

"today was really hectic at work," he admits with a shaky sigh, "i should have called to keep you in the loop. i'm sorry for making you worry like that, baby."

but instead of answering him, your inner turmoil ceased as you looked into his deeply concerned eyes; realizing that this overwhelming emotion inside wasn't just jealousy. it was love — desperate, all-consuming love that begged to be acknowledged and reciprocated.

through teary eyes, you look up at him in disbelief because he just seemed almost too good to be true. the words slip from your lips before you could stop them.

"i love you."

for a moment, namjoon freezes and blinks at you, his eyes searching yours intently, looking for any trace of uncertainty. it felt like an eternity before he reacted, and during that brief pause, the anticipation made your heart pound wildly in your ears.

finally, namjoon breaks into the most adorable smile you'd ever seen, barely managing to suppress a giggle by biting his lip. gently rubbing your arms to calm you further, he responds: "i know."

"namjoon!" you tearily half-scold, half-laugh in disbelief, playfully hitting his arm. he bursts out laughing at your reaction, intertwining his fingers with yours affectionately.

"it must have been difficult for you to say that."

through the remnants of tears, you admit: "i've tried to tell you so many times… but every time i wanted to say it… i just-"

namjoon doesn't let you finish your sentence. he watches you closely for a moment before leaving your hands to cup your cheeks delicately in his palms. as he pulls you closer to him, he leans in and presses his lips against yours in a slow and mindful kiss.

his tongue tentatively grazes the seam of your lips, seeking entrance, and you part them slightly.

his teeth lightly graze your bottom lip, coaxing a quiet sigh from within you. a soft moan escapes before you're able to stifle it, and only then do you recall that the two of you are still standing out in public.

the taste of him lingers on your tongue as he pulls away, and a soft whine escapes your lips at the loss of contact.

"i told you i wasn't expecting you to say it back," he murmurs, "the way you show me your love every day is enough. you, just as you are, are enough for me."

[joon4eva]

closer — kim namjoon.

summary. in which namjoon returns home from tour.

genre. established relationship ✰ smut (18+ pls)

word count: ~4,158 words

tags. unprotected sex; oral sex (f. receiving); handjob; disgusting amount of fluff; sooo much teasing; aftercare.

masterlist

—

the first rays of the sun gradually made their way through the curtains casting a warm, golden light into the bedroom. you were lost in a profound slumber, enveloped by a serene and tranquil dream when an unexpected tickling sensation on your neck stirred you from your rest. a small, barely-there peck drew your attention to the area. then another. and another.

slowly coming back to the world of awareness, you discover, much to your delight, that it was none other than namjoon showering tender kisses all over your neck and arms. slowly, he traces his lips along the contour of your shoulder and places a series of tiny pecks on each part of your exposed skin. the warmth of his breath as he sighs contentedly against you entices you further into wakefulness.

his voice, still laden with traces of sleep, breathily whispers into your ear, "i missed you."

namjoon's lips proceeded to gracefully dance across your skin, akin to gentle butterflies fluttering around. they trace a tender path from your shoulder onto your collarbone before finally landing on the sensitive area just behind your earlobe. your breath catches in your throat as he murmurs against your skin - each enunciated word sending shivers cascading down your spine.

"morning, sleepyhead," he murmurs softly with a loving tone that began to ease you out of sleep even more.

as namjoon presses his warm naked torso against yours, you couldn't help but marvel at how incredibly soothing his touch was. his presence was like a furnace, filling the room with an almost tangible heat. his body curved around yours with perfect symmetry and his arms were securely wrapped around your waist.

even though you enjoy every second of namjoon's gentle affections, the growing warmth ultimately became too much for your groggy state. whining softly from a mixture of discomfort and longing for more unencumbered intimacy, you shift restlessly in his embrace.

namjoon's sudden silence takes you by surprise. he pulls away slightly – just enough to gauge your reaction – and looks at you with eyes full of hurt and confusion. "after all that time i spent away on tour," he says defensively, sulking as he frowns at the sight of the distance between you two, "you're really going to reject me now?"

biting back a small grin, you turn on your side and reach out tentatively to cup his cheek gently in your hand. "no one's rejecting you," you murmur softly. "but it's just really hot in here." you couldn't help but let out a snort-laugh at his exaggerated sulkiness and reach out to affectionately tousle his unkempt hair – an action that never fails to elicit an endearing scrunching of his nose that you loved so much.

the corners of his mouth gradually curve into a smirk before he crosses his arms stubbornly across his chest. "well, if that's all it is…" he sighs theatrically, though you notice playfulness sparking in his eyes once more as he adjusts the sheets, allowing cooler air to circulate between your entwined bodies. as namjoon leans back and allows you some space, you study his familiar features – the sincerity in his gaze, the soft curve of his lips, all painting a picture of a man who radiated love and warmth. "there. better?"

the moment you give him a nod of approval, namjoon smiles warmly and pulls you back into his embrace. this time, with the sheets adjusted, it's much more comfortable. as your bodies meld back together, you intertwine your legs with his, pulling him as close as possible.

slowly, almost hesitantly, you lift your head to meet his gaze, and time seems to pause just before your lips touch.

your eyes flutter shut as your noses brush against one another, and the gentle pressure of his mouth against yours is like a taste of heaven. the kiss begins tenderly, understated but full of emotions that words could never express. it deepens gradually as the fire within both of you ignites; namjoon threads his fingers through your hair with a firm yet delicate grip, pulling you closer and making the intensity of the kiss grow.

a soft sigh escapes from between your lips as namjoon's large, warm hands find all the spots that make your pulse race – stroking along the curve of your hip, dipping into the small of your back, and brushing the sensitive skin at the nape of your neck. every touch leaves a trail of fire in its wake, spreading goosebumps across your skin like wildfire. soon enough, the sweet passion between you escalates – a subtle ache surging through your body as you feel his length harden against your thigh. the weighty evidence of his desire only serves to coax a quiet moan from you in response. namjoon himself is hardly silent, which is something you never get tired of. the sounds he produces are like music to your ears – first soft sighs and ragged breaths escalating to eager gasps and throaty moans. you can't deny how much they turn you on; there's just something primal about hearing his desire so plainly laid bare in the sounds he makes that it sends shivers down your spine and straight to your core.

his exploring hands drift lower until they reach the waistband of your panties. with a teasingly slow motion, his fingers slip beneath the fabric, gradually daring to venture further. his touch is featherlight, teasingly gentle as he traces your folds.

a soft gasp escapes your lips as his fingertips make contact with your slick arousal. his touch is both tender and firm, his fingers tracing maddeningly slow circles around your clit. namjoon's touch is a delicate dance, his fingers caressing and exploring, mapping out the contours of your most sensitive areas. he pays attention to every subtle reaction, his touch adjusting and intensifying with each trembling breath and hitched moan that spills from your lips. with each revolution, he applies just enough pressure to drive you to the edge, only to pull back and leave you yearning for more.

"does that feel good? tell me, baby," namjoon whispers softly but demanding into your ear. his deep voice reverberates through your trembling body.

the overwhelming pleasure clouds your thoughts, making it difficult to string together coherent words. despite this challenge, you manage to breathe out through a lust-induced haze: "yes… yes, namjoon. fuck, so good." your hand instinctively reaches for his arm—fingers digging into his skin as if driven by primal force—to anchor yourself in the present moment. just as you feel yourself teetering on the precipice, he somehow senses your impending release and withdraws his hand, leaving you gasping for more.

wide-eyed, you meet namjoon's gaze, your desire mirrored in his darkened eyes. wordlessly, namjoon brings his slick, glistening fingers to your slightly parted lips. parsing the unspoken invitation immediately, you eagerly take his offered fingers between your own parted lips and indulge in taste of your arousal. your tongue swirls languidly around his digits as if drawing patterns against them—eliciting deep groans from namjoon that hint at just how much he's enjoying this interlude as much as you are.

the fleeting moment of stillness is suddenly broken as namjoon's lips forcefully collide with yours and his tongue eagerly makes its way into your mouth.

breaking the kiss, he swiftly pulls your his shirt up and over your head, his gaze fixated on your exposed breasts, your nipples tantalizingly perked from the cool air. namjoon's lips trail a scorching path down your body, hands squeezing your breasts while his lips leave a trail of wet kisses and nips. with every inch he traverses, the heat between your thighs intensifies, aching for his touch. with a flick of his fingers, he effortlessly removes your panties, discarding them carelessly on the floor. his hands guide your thighs apart, and he settles himself between them, his breath hot against your sensitive flesh.

with a slow, deliberate motion, his tongue emerges from between his lips, wetting them in a teasing display as his gaze locks with yours. then, his tongue ventures forward, delicately tracing along the folds. he explores your entrance, his tongue circling the perimeter, before plunging deep inside you, eliciting a moan of pleasure that echoes through the room.

"namjoon—," you gasp, your fingers instinctively tangling in his hair, urging him to continue. your fingers curl in the sheets as his tongue ventures deeper. namjoon manipulates his probing tongue expertly—flicking, swirling, occasionally letting it linger—masterfully alternating between subtle grazes and intense pressure as if he's attuned to the rhythm of your pleasure. his ministrations are both a slow, torturous tease and an intense rush of ecstasy.

"p-please, namjoon," you mewl. you writhe beneath him, your hips instinctively rising to meet his mouth, seeking more. namjoon's hands grip your thighs, holding you in place as he continues his relentless assault on your senses. he knows your body so well, every secret spot and hidden desire, and he uses that knowledge to drive you closer to the edge.

with every stroke of his tongue, he brings you to the brink of climax, only to ease back and prolong the pleasure. he teases your entrance again, his tongue dipping inside briefly before returning to the swirling motions on your clit. the sensation is maddening, a delicious torment that pushes you to the edge of sanity.

incoherent babbling spills from your lips, fragmented words and moans blending together in a symphony of pleasure.

in a moment of lucidity amidst the dizzying sensations flooding your body, you manage to whimper out a plea to namjoon: "wait… please wait. i-i don't want to come just yet." confused by your request and with a glistening trail of your arousal lingering on his chin and nose, he gazes up at you with questioning eyes as he continues to grip your thighs firmly in place.

"i want… i need…," your voice quavers with an overwhelming mixture of emotions as you confess, "i want you inside of me."

namjoon's eyes widen for a second before a grin spreads across his face. a deep chuckle escapes him at your admission; the sound reverberates through you like waves in a calm sea. maintaining eye contact with you, he offers a teasing reply: "now who said that i couldn't give my baby multiple orgasms?" his fingers leave gentle trails on the inside of your thigh, embodying an ironic innocence given the serious and sinful nature of his words.

consciously ensuring that he remains at that tantalizing edge and not allowing you the full release just yet, he plants tender yet frustratingly sweet wet kisses on the delicate skin of your inner thighs along the path to your glistening core. it takes all of your willpower not to squirm under his touch, your body yearning for the climax that he holds just out of reach.

"joon," you whine, the sound escaping your lips in a breathy plea. you bite your lip and paw at the sheets, your fingers curling and releasing in a desperate attempt to find some semblance of control. his chuckle deepens while a sly grin unfolds upon his lips, clearly enjoying the effect he holds over you.

as you teeter on the brink once more, he lowers his head again, his lips latching around your swollen clit. the moment his tongue intensifies its assault, sucking gently and lapping at your sensitive bud, your entire being trembles with pleasure. the sensations wash over you in waves, igniting a delicious ache deep within your core.

but namjoon isn't satisfied with just his mouth. his hand slides between your parted thighs, his finger poised at your entrance. slowly, he eases his finger inside, the slick warmth of your walls enveloping him. as he plunges his finger deeper, a moan escapes your lips, your body arching instinctively toward him.

his finger curls inside you, expertly stroking against your velvety walls, searching for that perfect spot that will drive you wild. his tongue never ceases its fervent assault on your clit, alternating between delicate flicks and firm, relentless licks. the combined sensations send electric jolts of pleasure coursing through your body, coiling your muscles tighter and tighter.

your breathing becomes erratic, your moans growing louder and more urgent. the intensity builds within you, threatening to burst free at any moment.

with one final, tantalizing swirl of his tongue and a perfectly timed curl of his finger, he sends you hurtling over the edge. a strangled cry escapes your throat, your body convulsing in the throes of a mind-shattering orgasm.

namjoon, ever attentive, watches you intently, his eyes filled with a mix of awe and desire. he revels in the sight before him, your body quivering with pleasure, your eyebrows drawn together and your lips parted as you pant in ecstasy. the raw, uninhibited beauty of the moment leaves him momentarily breathless.

as the last remnants of your climax ripple through your body, leaving you trembling and breathless, namjoon slowly withdraws his finger and eases himself up, a triumphant and satisfied smile gracing his lips. crawling back up your trembling body, namjoon captures your lips in a searing kiss, feeling the taste of your arousal.

as your body gradually starts to settle, namjoon gently pulls away from the kiss, gazing upon your face with tender concern. he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand before planting a soft peck against your forehead, as if attempting to smooth out the slight creases that formed. his eyes twinkle with warmth as he lets out a breathy chuckle before asking, "okay?"

you hum in response to his question. "want more, though." as your gaze drifts downward, you can't help but notice the unmistakable bulge straining against the fabric of namjoon's shorts. a smile plays on your lips as you lower your hand, deliberately palming him through the material.

namjoon inhales sharply, his eyes widening with surprise. a low groan escapes his lips as he leans into your touch, his hips involuntarily rocking against your hand.

encouraged by his reaction, you slip your hands beneath the waistband of his shorts and underneath the soft fabric of his boxers. you skillfully lower the fabric, throwing it haphazardly to the floor, exposing his throbbing shaft to your hungry gaze. namjoon's length stands proudly with a bead of glistening pre-cum adorning its tip. the warmth of his skin greets your touch, your fingers wrapping around his length. a sharp intake of breath escapes namjoon's lips as your hand starts to stroke him, your grip firm yet gentle.

his eyes flutter closed, his head tilting back slightly as a low groan escapes his parted lips.

moans escape both of you as he aligns himself with your entrance, slowly pushing inside. you gasp at the delicious stretch, feeling him bottom out within you, his size filling you completely. whimpering his name, you cling to him desperately, the world around you fading into blissful oblivion.

hungering for more closeness, your lips meet namjoon's in a feverish kiss. breathless moans fill the room as both of you lose yourselves to the passionate embrace. fingers entwined in one another's hair, needing and wanting more; it's impossible to tell where one of you begins and the other ends.

"fucking love you," namjoon breathlessly murmurs between heated gasps for air, punctuating each word in rhythm with every powerful thrust of his hips. "i've wanted this…wanted you, for so long."

with each calculated movement, namjoon hits that specific spot within you that makes your vision blur with pleasure, the sensations sending bright, dazzling specks of light dancing before your eyes. the intensity of it all causes tears to prick at the corners of your eyes as you cry out involuntarily.

unable to hold back any longer, you finally respond to namjoon's confession, raw emotion coursing through every last syllable that leaves your mouth as the words tumble out. "love you too, baby. so, so much," you whisper, breathless and in awe.

as if spurred on by your response, namjoon reacts by tightening his grip around your legs. he lifts them gently and wraps them securely around his waist before steadily increasing the force of his thrusts. he firmly pins your arms above your head, weaving his fingers delicately through yours. this change in angle allows him to penetrate even deeper, intensifying the sensations that ripple through your core.

your eyes flutter shut in the midst of overwhelming pleasure, but namjoon's voice, thick with desire, draws you back from the brink.

"look at me, baby," he coos, his voice dripping with desire.

his intense gaze pulls you back from the abyss of pleasure, and you obediently open your eyes, meeting his hungry stare. "there we go. so beautiful like this," he murmurs, "so responsive, so eager for me."

effortlessly, his hand slides between your entwined bodies, fingers deftly seeking out your swollen clit. moving with unhurried precision, he delicately traces circles around the ultra-sensitive nub with the pads of his fingers while planting a trail of warm, wet kisses along the curve of your neck. your other intertwined hand is still clasped tightly together, fingers turning white from your vice-like grip.

as if namjoon knows exactly what buttons to push to get a reaction out of you, he continues to speak. whispering dirty words of encouragement and praise that only serve to drive you closer to that coveted edge. his voice is smooth as velvet but dripping with sin as he urges you on, "that's it, baby." he gauges how close you are when he asks with a breathy tone in his voice, "you're so close, aren't you? you going to come for me?"

in response, you nod furiously between shallow breaths and bite down on your lip to stifle a moan – the sheer amount of pleasure makes speaking almost impossible at this point. without any conscious decision on your part, your hips begin to buck against him. in tandem with his deep thrusts and precise movements against your clit, a cascade of moans and whimpers escape both of your lips. you can feel the familiar coil of release tightening within you, ready to unravel.

and with a final thrust and swirl of namjoon's fingers, you cry out his name as your walls clench around him, pulling him deeper. namjoon's body tenses, and a deep, guttural moan rips from his throat. in that moment, you feel his release, warm and pulsing, painting your insides.

then stillness.

the room fills with deep breaths and the warmth emanating from your connected bodies. namjoon collapses onto you and immediately buries his face into the crook of your neck, his chest heaving with exertion.

you become aware once more of the sensations around you: the smell of sweat and cologne that fill your nostrils and the sounds of punctuated breaths intermingling in the quiet air. your limbs still wrapped securely around him—arms encircling his shoulder blades like a hug while legs retain their position firm around his waist—you bask in the shared afterglow.

heavy breaths mingle, and your heartbeats gradually slow, bringing you back to the reality of the room.

after a moment, you feel the rise and fall of his chest against your skin as he lifts his head to look at you. his eyes soften as they meet yours, and he can't help but smile as he breathes out a simple "hi."

you can't help but shyly giggle at the simple greeting, feeling a wave of love for this man wash over you as you reply with a matching, "hi."

he brings his lips down to place a soft kiss on your forehead, your nose, and then finally your lips - each touch impossibly gentle in contrast to what had transpired moments prior.

"when did you get back? i didn't even hear you come in."

namjoon grins before explaining, "the company van dropped me off around 4 am. i didn't want to wake you." feigning annoyance but unable to suppress your grin, you reply with a teasing tone, "well, you should have."

eventually, namjoon gathers enough strength to carefully withdraw from you. once free from your embrace, he pushes himself up off the bed and strides across the room. your gaze falls upon his strong naked back – toned muscles rippling and glistening with beads of perspiration. you feel your face rush with warmth as your eyes hungrily trace his form, leaving your heart racing even more than before.

he returns promptly with a warm damp towel slung across his shoulder, a water bottle, and fresh sheets.

with gentle hands, he begins to clean you up as you take turns having sips of water. the soothing touch of the fabric against your skin elicits a contented sigh from your lips. thanking him as he finishes cleaning you, namjoon suggests, "you should go to the bathroom while i change the sheets, love." you pout and let out a playful whine, feeling too comfortable to move.

he shoots you a skeptical eyebrow lift as if daring you to contradict him further but conceding to your unwillingness to move, begins to reach around you, determined to carry you to the bathroom despite your resistance. upon his first touch, a sudden surge of laughter and half-hearted protest arises, and you squeal in response to his intentions. "i can go by myself!" you manage between bubbles of laughter.

with a playful swat to your naked behind, namjoon pulls back and encourages you onward. you wobble slightly under his touch, as the surprising sensation momentarily sets your legs off balance. namjoon laughs at your reaction, rushing forward to catch you before you stumble further.

"careful there," he teases with a glint in his eye, his hands firmly supporting you. you shoot him a playful glare in response.

"you think this is funny?" you retort, feigning seriousness as a giggle betrays your attempted facade. "you're definitely going to pay for that."

namjoon kisses your temple lovingly. "i look forward to it."

once you reach the bathroom, namjoon steadies you and places another tender kiss on your forehead before retreating to change the sheets. you take a moment to pee and freshen up before making your way back to the bedroom. the sound of crisp linen being smoothed over the mattress drifts through the slightly ajar door.

as you enter, you find namjoon diligently finishing up with the fresh sheets. his naked form is a sight to behold, causing a faint flutter in the pit of your stomach.

namjoon turns to you, his eyes lighting up at the sight of you returning. "all done," he says, a hint of satisfaction in his voice.

you playfully stick out your tongue. "you're so efficient," you remark, earning a chuckle from namjoon.

once you're settled back into the soft embrace of fresh sheets, namjoon joins you, wrapping his arms around you protectively.

lying down next to each other in the scented sheets, you both turn to face one another, allowing your eyes to lock on each other's.

namjoon brushes a strand of hair away from your face, studying its texture between his fingertips before leaning in to press a gentle kiss against your lips. it's slow and tender before it gradually begins building into something more passionate and fiery.

he breaks the kiss momentarily, resting his forehead against yours as both of you pause to catch your breaths. "so how are we planning on making me pay?"

a grin spreads across your face as your hands glide downwards toward his torso playfully. "well," you muse innocently at first with slight mischief coloring your tone, "there are always massages if we want to take things slow." you let silence briefly fill space between your words before adding with a sly grin: "but i think we can be more creative than that – don't you agree?"

namjoon's laughter rings through the room. "i'm always up for a little creativity."

feeling a slight shiver run down your spine due to a mix of exhaustion and slowly cooling sweat, you realize just how spent you truly are. however, the warmth of namjoon's embrace keeps the chill at bay and provides a sense of security that envelops you like a protective blanket. as if sensing your need for further comfort, he pulls the sheets up and around the two of you, the soft fabric cocooning your sated bodies.

as you lay there nestled against him, namjoon guides your head to rest on his chest – your ear pressed against his warm skin, allowing you to hear the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. his arm remains draped protectively around you, while he gently traces soothing patterns with his fingertips over your exposed back and shoulders, massaging away any lingering tension. feeling your eyelids grow heavy with sleep, you fight to keep them open. however, namjoon reassures you with a soft whisper.

"go ahead and sleep, my love. i'll be right here when you wake up."

[joon4eva]

FOREVER? ✰ KIM NAMJOON

pairing: namjoon x f. reader genre: strangers-to-lovers ✰ fluff word count: ~1,640 words tags/warnings: none, really.

the reception hall buzzed with excitement as the newlyweds swayed in each other's arms, sunlight filtering through the large windows and bathing them in a warm glow.

you, feeling slightly out of place, retreat to the bar and perch on a stool, a glass of red wine in hand.

truth be told, weddings have always made you sulky — something about watching other people's happiness can be a tad unbearable.

you weren't much of a drinker, but the setting demanded some sort of prop to give off the appearance of enjoyment.

your eyes scan the crowd of familiar and unfamiliar faces, half-heartedly appreciating their joviality as they reveled in the festivity that weddings brought.

​​a man walks up to the bar with an easy sway in his step. he stands out from the crowd: sporting dark hair that frames his face and tall with just enough muscle to hint at hidden strength but not to overburden his lean frame.

there's something captivating about him. although he dresses simply, there's an undeniable elegance and charm to his appearance.

he moves closer to order his drink, and without meaning to, your gaze lingers on him.

his eyes suddenly meet yours, and it feels like he can see right through you.

you didn't even realize you were staring until your eyes meet and you feel your face instantly warm in mortification. great.

but he just grins at you and throws in a playful wink, setting off laughter between both of you and breaking the ice.

with an amused smile on his face, he raises an eyebrow and approaches you.

"it's not polite to stare.”

"i guess i owe you an apology then," you reply as you grin back sheepishly.

he chuckles lightheartedly before extending his hand towards you. was that a dimple? you must be imagining things.

"namjoon," he introduces himself. you take his hand gently and introduce yourself as well.

"nice to meet you," you say, still holding onto his hand a moment longer than necessary.

"the pleasure is all mine," namjoon replies with a soft smile.

he releases your hand slowly, his fingertips brushing your skin lightly.

his proximity makes you acutely aware of every detail of his face: his tan skin, the faint stubble that shadows his jawline, the way his dark eyes gleam, and yup, those were definitely dimples.

you feel an unexpected attraction to him and find it harder to look away than usual. his confidence is disarming but not overbearing.

you're intrigued and appreciate the boldness he brings.

"mind if i join you?" he asks, gesturing to the stool next to yours.

"please do. you're a friend of the groom's or…?"

namjoon shakes his head as he takes a seat. "nah, i'm actually friends with the bride's cousin. i know virtually nobody here."

"ah, so that makes two of us then. i'm friends with the bride, but we haven't really kept in touch over the years. now that we're all gathered, i find myself hardly recognizing anyone."

namjoon casually drapes his arm over the back of your chair, not quite touching your shoulder but close enough that you can catch a whiff of his cologne and feel the warmth radiating from him. "well, aren't we a pair? maybe we can keep each other company then."

you tilt your head considering his offer and respond, "i'd like that."

you find out that underneath the sultry demeanor, namjoon is incredibly intelligent and well-read.

you bond over your shared love for literature, poetry, and philosophy. it turns out that you both enjoy the same authors and have been to some of the same bookstores in the city.

namjoon passionately talks about a recent novel he read, and you catch yourself staring at the movement of his lips as he excitedly recounts the story.

namjoon's kindness doesn't go unnoticed either.

you observe him engage with the waitstaff at the bar, always saying "please" and "thank you." simple acts that might seem mundane when performed by anyone else suddenly become intriguing when he does them. like the way he runs his fingers through his hair when deep in thought. even something like lifting his glass to take a sip or leaning back casually against his chair seem effortless yet so damn attractive.

you like it. you like him.

as the night goes on and empty glasses pile up on the bar counter, namjoon pulls himself even closer — so close that his thigh is touching yours and each time either of you chuckles or leans in slightly during whispered moments of banter, you feel his warm breath on your skin.

that wall of distance which was holding back your mutual attraction gradually crumbles under the weight of the liquor's influence. you find yourself leaning closer and closer to namjoon, your personal space no longer off-limits.

during one particularly heated exchange about books both of you adore and can't understand why others don't, namjoon boldly tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear in gentle defiance; his fingertips fleetingly grazing your cheek in the process make your heart skip a beat.

he gauges your reaction for a moment, sensing if you're receptive or reluctant concerning his advance.

you feel your cheeks burn and surprised by the sudden heat growing within you. feeling eager to escape the crowded reception, you impulsively stand up and grab namjoon's arm, pulling him from his chair.

"let's go," you urge. a playful grin spreads across his face as he stumbles after you, laughter bubbling between you both.

as you sprint through the venue, weaving around tables and startled guests, your laughter echoes through the room, growing louder with each stride.

finally escaping the confines of the bustling room, the brisk night air greets your warm cheeks while you continue to sprint breathlessly for several more blocks.

the feeling intensifies as every step sends the world spinning ever so slightly.

as streetlights morph into streaks of color, the adrenaline pumping through your veins, fueled by several glasses of wine have left you feeling a bit dizzy and inexplicably bolder.

rounding a dimly lit corner and making a mad dash across the dimly lit street, you veer toward a quiet park nestled inconspicuously among the towering cityscape.

clad in shadows cast by ancient trees and illuminated softly by the moon's glow, you both come to an abrupt halt against a nearby bench, panting heavily and doubled over as the laughter slowly fades into ragged breaths.

amidst your gasping attempts to catch your breath, you glance down and suddenly notice that your hands somehow found each other - fingers intertwined effortlessly.

looking down at your clasped hands and then up at namjoon, you shyly giggle, and he mirrors your reaction with an equally warm smile.

his eyes flicker from yours down to your slightly parted lips, made rosy and full by the earlier glasses of wine, and then back up again – an intent gaze accompanied by a light dusting of red on his cheeks and nose.

you lean in a little closer, and namjoon takes it as a cue to bridge the gap between you two.

his hand tenderly cups your cheek as he places his other arm around your waist, drawing your bodies together.

"can i?"

you nod slightly, unable to trust your voice with the torrent of emotions swirling inside you.

hesitantly, but delicately, he closes the gap between you, his lips softly pressing against yours.

the soft brush of his lips fans the heat within you, your heartbeat pounding furiously in your chest.

your hand instinctively slides up his neck and into the hair at his nape, fingers gently tugging to elicit a low moan from him.

namjoon's grip on your waist tightens, almost possessive but not forceful - just enough to reassure you that he has no intentions of letting go anytime soon.

namjoon tilts his head just enough so that his tongue barely grazes past your lips to playfully brush against your own; a lingering trace of whiskey teases your taste buds.

with each tender stroke of his tongue and every peck and nip on your lips, you find yourself sinking deeper into a whirlpool of emotions that you never imagined could be so overwhelming yet exhilarating.

his fingers dig into the small of your back as if anchoring himself to you – unwilling to let this moment slip away ��� while yours trace patterns along his spine, each new discovery eliciting another shudder or gasp.

as your breathing grows heavier and more ragged, namjoon's sheer need gradually softens into a tender embrace as he pulls away slightly. his breathing is uneven and eyes widened by the flood of emotion threatening to drown him.

he gazes at you intently, searching for answers to questions not yet formed.

as he regains composure, uncertainty washes over him like a torrential wave.

finally finding his voice again, he asks with trepidation dancing in his glistening eyes, "can i see you again?"

his vulnerability in this moment tugs at your heartstrings. with a smile, you reach up to gently stroke his face, your thumb caressing the heated skin of his cheek. "yes," you whisper, your voice barely audible.

namjoon exhales, relief washing over him as the knot in his chest loosens. a warm smile graces his lips as he tenderly presses a chaste kiss to your forehead.

as the moonlight continues to bathe your surroundings in a gentle glow, the two of you sit side by side on the bench – entwined fingers resting on your lap – both lost in thought and basking in the lingering feelings of this serendipitous encounter among the ancient trees and moonlit shadows.