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Velvet Lace
Citrines creep from the shadows to dance away from his face in the lights of the kitchen.
"All right. What did you do? Are you dangerous?" Not even sure why he asked the second part, as if she'd answer honestly.
Lungs preparing to leap from the tallest building on the sharp inhale. "I was found guilty of seducing the King and attempting to plot against and overthrow the queen."
"Well, I don't exactly have a girlfriend for you to try to get rid of and I certainly don't have any position of power, or much of anything for you to try to seduce me out of. So guess you're out of luck on that one."
Her chest burned with the fires of air being stolen. She could tell him how she'd found herself in the devil's graces, but what was the point? He'd believe what he wanted, just as they all had. Who'd believe a servant over the King and Queen that had welcomed her into their home? Their word is law. "I'm not after anything from you. I just wanted somewhere safe to sleep for a few days, but I'll be on my way now." Tightness pulling at her lips, shattering the porcelain of a doll's skin.
"Wait. Finish eating. Just let me think for a moment."
Gaping like a fish pulled fresh from the sea.
*****
"All right, since I don't have anything you'd be after, I suppose so can stay for a bit longer. Until we figure something out for you. Sound good?"
"I'm sorry, what? You're not immediately kicking me out? Why?"
"The scars you have, was that your punishment?"
"Among other things, yes."
"Then I figure you've paid your debt. The world can be just as cruel, as I'm sure you're aware. And I can't in good conscience send you out there into it without anything. For God's sake you don't even have a name."
"Sure I do. It's Diana."
"Right. Diana. And about the whole cat thing, maybe stay as a cat around others for now until we get this figured out. I don't need more questions from people to complicate things right now. Do you understand?"
"So you like me to change back now?"
"No, not when we're here by ourselves. You can do whatever, just when we go out in public, for now. But please put some clothes on as a person." The sun's sole attention spraying Josh's face in heat.
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Velvet Lace part 10
"Ummm... Ok. Ummm. I... I'm not quite sure what to do or say right now. Ummm... This is quite a bit to take in," Josh stammers. His feet eating at the floor with each pass.
"You don't really have to say anything. Would you prefer me turn back?"
"Uh. No. We need to talk, but first let's find you some clothes."
"Oh, you don't need to worry with that. I'm fine with the sheet."
"You might be ok with it, but for my sake, I'd really appreciate you putting some clothes on."
"Your sake?"
"Yes, for my sake. I'm having some trouble... Uh... Concentrating." The blush of his cheeks turning from the light pink blooms of spring to roses of summer's heat.
"That bad, huh? I thought this body'd held up better than I'd imagined."
"Than you imagined?" The color flushing down the sink with a single tilt of the head. "Ya know what, we'll talk about it once you're dressed." Rummaging through drawers, he tugs a shirt from it's family and an orphaned pair of sweatpants makes a new friend. "Here, put these on. I'll be in the kitchen." Tossing the fabric mass on the stripped bed, beating race horses out the door.
"Great. Fantastic job, Diana. Way to screw everything up," she murmurs to herself. A quick glance in the mirror, exploring the curves and turns of a foreign body. Brown and white scars littering the otherwise smooth skin. Shaky fingers stippling each mark with a mind of their own. Singeing each tip. Throwing her hands down and turning back to Josh's clothes. Detergent permeating her air space, comforting her.
*****
Creeping around the corner on kitten's feet, she spies her impromptu roommate at the stove with his back to her. "Hi," meekly squeaking, alerting him to her presence. A sun radiating tension.
He peeks over his shoulder at her trying to hide in the doorway. His face softening. "Have a seat. I hope you eat eggs since I don't know what human you eats."
A shallow nod rippling the air. "Yes. Eggs are fine. Thank you, you didn't need to."
"I was making some for myself. I need to eat before I start working through this."
She crept to the chair, easing herself into it with the greatest of care. Feeling where a river of hands had flown over the table smoothing the the texture like a drowning stone. The softness, soothing her jagged nerves. Inspect foreign hands that breathed of familiarity that seemed more a fever dream than reality. The clang of the plate and silverware appearing before her startling her from the whirlpool in her head.
"So what's your name?"
"Diana."
"No, that's what I've been calling you, but what's your real name. I'd rather call you that."
"I... I... I don't remember."
"You don't remember... Are you serious?"
The knot in her throat holding her words hostage, she quietly nods refusing to meet his eyes.
"How do you not remember your own name?"
"It was taken from me," barely a whisper.
"Taken from you..." His hands anxiously begin trek through the brunette forest upon his head. "Who could take your name from you?"
The chair croaking from the shifting weight, screaming out to the thick air in the air. "The King and Queen."
"King and Queen? Of where?"
"The shapeshifter world is not quite like your own. We enter your world, but we have one of our own as well that sits just below the surface of yours."
"How have I never heard of this place?"
"Well, it's a mysterious place full of the magics of the world. That magic hides it from human eyes. And it you were to accidentally find it, the spell would just spit you out on the other side of the cloaked space. It's been that way for centuries."
"Ok, so magic place with invisibility cloak with a king and queen. Got it. Why'd they take your name?"
"It was not merely my name, it was everything. My home, my identity, my life."
"All right but why?"
"Something very bad that I was found guilty of. We do not have a court system like yours. The King and Queen are judge, jury and executioner there. Their rule above all else and I was enemy number 1."
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Severe anxiety, OCD, and high functioning depression here. I've gotten control of my OCD for the most part over the years unless put in a really stressful situation (which may not seem stressful to anyone else on the outside). I immediately start straightening things and putting everything at 90° angles. I know I'm doing it, but cannot stop until there's nothing left for me to hyperfocus on, someone stops me, or the situation goes away. Part of my anxiety coping (which ties to the OCD also and is really the only thing that hangs around on the daily) is I make lists. Lots of lists. And my husband always knows when I'm more anxious than normal bc lists will be everywhere for any possible thing I could make a list for that day (books to read, shows to watch, things to throw out in the fridge, etc). And high functioning depression- most people can't see it when they look at me. And according to my therapist it's arguably more dangerous than the typical depression. Bc people look at me and see bright smiles and laughter. I've been told before "you can't be depressed, you smile too much." High functioning depressed people are just as likely to do the scary things that low functioning depressed people do, but without all the external warnings. They could be smiling and laughing and still hurt themselves or kill themselves and no one ever see it coming.




What You Say About Mental Illness vs What You Actually Mean.
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Severe anxiety, OCD, and high functioning depression here. I've gotten control of my OCD for the most part over the years unless put in a really stressful situation (which may not seem stressful to anyone else on the outside). I immediately start straightening things and putting everything at 90° angles. I know I'm doing it, but cannot stop until there's nothing left for me to hyperfocus on, someone stops me, or the situation goes away. Part of my anxiety coping (which ties to the OCD also and is really the only thing that hangs around on the daily) is I make lists. Lots of lists. And my husband always knows when I'm more anxious than normal bc lists will be everywhere for any possible thing I could make a list for that day (books to read, shows to watch, things to throw out in the fridge, etc). And high functioning depression- most people can't see it when they look at me. And according to my therapist it's arguably more dangerous than the typical depression. Bc people look at me and see bright smiles and laughter. I've been told before "you can't be depressed, you smile too much." High functioning depressed people are just as likely to do the scary things that low functioning depressed people do, but without all the external warnings. They could be smiling and laughing and still hurt themselves or kill themselves and no one ever see it coming.




What You Say About Mental Illness vs What You Actually Mean.
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Velvet Lace part 9
The stillness seeped into her bones. The occasional page turn chirping from the quiet that seemed eternal until broken. Screaming so loud it made ears ring. An old smell pleasantly raining in the air. Diana leaped into the leather throne she had claimed the second day in the shop.
Quinn had pulled her from her backpack carrier within seconds of Josh stepping through the portal from the real world to this one of fantasy and mystery, romance and horror. She would argue that the people in these tomes were more real than often given credit. To escape the dull gray of this world and enter another that was closer than it seemed. Close enough to just be a finger tip's distance away. The older man had brought down a towel from the store room, preparing for her arrival. Bunching it up into the chair and tucking her in. Her own dais from which to watch the strangers pass by. Some reaching out to brush the fur on her side before continuing on.
The tinkling sounds from above the door announce the newest entrant, but not a new customer. The woman in her peach dress that the wind bites starvingly at has been in most days at least once that Diana had noticed. But this wasn't all the shadow had noted in her black book about the woman. No, she watched the way the woman's gaze lingered on Josh when she swayed passed, skirts dancing in time to her hips. The woman wasn't shy, but certainly not the type to usually make the 1st move, no matter how much the idea scrolled across her face. She would just quietly flirt and behold the man who had yet to notice her attention. Men, the cat thought. Anyone could see that her insignificant search requests were only the ruse her heart wished would communicate to his own. Anyone except Josh Wells apparently.
She would need to be going on her way soon she supposed. But perhaps, she mused, she could leave his life a bit happier than she'd found it. Maybe someone to comfort him in his time of need when she would make her escape in the night, venturing into the world of one of the adventures penned in a book she surrounds herself with each day. Yes, he has been kind to her. Kinder than any other has been to a stray on the streets. She would try to do him this favor.
The creeping black smoke rolled across the floor to where her temporary master kneeled to pull a jacketless book from a box. The ripened peach tucked around the corner, being summoned like a beacon. The predator laying in wait for her chance to strike. The woman's fair skin, glowing from the sun raining through the windows steps around the end cap bringing her knee to face with Josh. Startled, he stands. Fishing for the words to ask if she needs help. The quiet chatter awkward as they both stumble through sentences that would make a sinner's ears bleed with how polite they are.
Now. This is the chance, Diana hoped she would be strong enough, but only her actions would tell. Strolling up, she rubs her cheeks to the man's pant leg. Lulling into a false sense of safety. The black cat lunges, throwing all her weight to the backs of his legs. He fumbles the book gripped in his hand as he tries to right himself. His hands going to the woman's arms, pushing his body close to hers. Steadying himself, he makes a quick retreat. The interaction reddening both parties' cheeks, murmuring apologies. A gentle, not wholly disappointed, smile pings her lips, while her eyes cast down to the floor. "Ummm... If you're all right, I'm gonna head to the back to grab more books," Josh practically whispers before racing off.
How can he not see the heady flush that took over the woman's face at the contact? A cherry blossom blooming into spring. The cat shakes her head before heading back to the warm leather arm chair, scheming ways to get him closer to the pleasant fruit he might enjoy a bite from if he just plucked it from the tree.
*****
A screeching shatters the reverie, a peaceful one for once, jolting Diana awake. The warm blankets and solid length beside her skittering across the bed away. Her golden eyes opening, scanning for dangers she cannot perceive.
"What? Why are you screaming?" She asks in a stranger's voice that hasn't been her own in many moons.
"Stranger in my bed. Stranger in my bed," his tone edging on hysteria. "Naked stranger in my bed. Pretty, naked stranger in my bed."
"Shit," she says full of emotion.
"Shit? That's all you can say? Shit? Who the fuck are you? And why are you in my bed? And where are your clothes?"
At his final question, she finally peers down, confirming his words. Her lush body, a distant memory now firmly cemented in her face. "Shit," she says emphatically, scrambling to tug the sheet from the bed around her body. Twinning snakes coiled tightly, holding butterfly wings around her.
"Yes! You said that already, but who the fuck are you? And how'd you get in my house?"
"Shit, this is awkward. I haven't done this since I was a wee kitten," shame steeping her voice in dread. "I'm Diana. Your cat."
"Ok, so you're a very pretty, insane, naked girl in my bed. Fantastic. I'm gonna go ahead and call the police now."
"No, no, no! Josh, stop! Don't do that!"
"How do you know my name?"
"I told you. I'm Diana. Your cat," her tone hinting the answer should be obvious. Listen, if I wasn't Diana how would I have gotten in? Or know you work at the book store? Or know that the cat's name, my name, is Diana?"
"Bc obviously you're stalking me." His fingers ppised to dial the emergency number.
"Josh I'm not stalking you. Just stop for a second. Let me explain!" She takes a step towards him, tripping in the sheet. His retreat hasty to keep the space between them. "Josh please," she pleads. "5 minutes. Just give me 5 minutes to explain and convince you. And if after that you still don't believe me than call the police and have me hauled away."
"Oh, so I need your permission to call the police?"
"No of course not, but please, I'm begging you. Just 5 minutes." The sincerity in her golden eyes that he shakes the familiarity off at the sight of, warms him only mildly. But it's still just enough the thaw his fingers from their rigor mortis around the phone.
"5 minutes. That's it. Starting now. Go!"
"I really am your cat," she says holding up a hand, waving off his denials. "I'm a shapeshifter. This is what I really look like, but I can become a cat too. In fact, I've been a cat for a very long time now. And last night was the 1st time I've lost control of a shift since I was a kid. I'm sorry, you were never meant to find out, especially not like this. I was just supposed to slip out one night and you never see me again."
A confused stricken look envelopes his features. "Say I believe you, you were just going to leave?"
The embarrassed shame she already felt being drowned and twisted into the shame that now ate anyway at her belly. Eating her, consuming her from the inside out. Chasing heat up into a face that felt it might burst from the blood packing in. She doesn't answer him. Her bright eyes avoiding a meeting in the middle with his own.
"Right." He sucks his teeth and nods. "So you're a cat, huh? Fine. Show me."
Her eyes snap up to his finally. "Show you?"
"Yes. Show me. Turn back into my cat. Prove that you are what you claim to be. Seeing is believing and frankly I'm not sure I'll believe it until then."
Running throught the scenarios in her head, she nods to the carpet. "All right. I'll show you." She looks to him, searching his face. Preparing heraelf to run when things go badly. She knew she needed to leave soon, she just didn't expect it to be like this. Taking a step back to the middle of the room, she drops the sheet. His gaze too startled by the bones crunching and reforming to think on her brazen behavior.
And the shouting began again. He hadn't thought she really could change, the midnight fur running from her curly hair across the curves and planes of her body. A tail creeping from her skin, swishing and slashing the air. Compacting down to the feline he had shared his bed with for almost a week. The only thing remaining of the gorgeous woman in the equally remarkable cat were those amber eyes that glowed in any light. The blood slamming down into his feet making him sway and catch himself on the dresser.
His furry companion shifting her weight on her feet before growing and becoming again. "You really are a cat," his eyes wide, showing whites like a horse reading to bolt.
"I am," her voice barely a whisper, but he still hears it in the gelatinous silence filling the room. Her nakedness not seeming to concern her, he bends to snatch up the sheet handing it back to her. She nods her thanks before cacooning herself back in it.
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Velvet Lace part 8
"Mr. Wells?"
Josh stood from his seat tucked in the corner of the lobby.
"We're ready for you. If you'll just follow me back, Dr. Milton will be right with you."
She cat rustled in her back pack as he settled in onto the counter top in the small office. The walls blushing with color, diagrams pinning the walls apart, haloing each open surface. The sharp tang of disinfectant biting at her nose. Moans, whimpers and blatant wails chasing down the hallways. Fear coloring the scents, leaking under each doorway, searching for an open escape.
A slip of a woman tentatively slides in the crack in the door, prepared for a furry dart. "Hi, Mr. Wells?" she asks holding out a hand to him. "I'm Dr. Milton. What can I do for you today?"
"Well I found this cat, some kids were throwing rocks at her. She was really dirty and pretty thin, so she's probably been out for a while. She's a sweet girl and been staying with me the last few days. I wanted to get her checked over, see if maybe she's chipped. Get her back to her owner."
"Ok. Well let's take a look." She reaches for the backpack, gentling the shadow from her stronghold. "Oh, she certainly is a pretty one. A real shame someone lost her, but you're right- still a bit thin. What are you feeding her?"
"Free feeding some dry food, hoping she'll pack on some weight. And some wet food for dinner."
"Ok that's good for now. Just watch the free feeding to make sure onve she's up to weight she doesn't eat too much. Let's go ahead and scan her first to see if we have a home." A little box pulled from the drawer beside her, moving over the cat's back. "Nope, nothing. Ok, so here's the deal. The shelter currently is packed and really doesn't have room for another animal. We've taken a lot of their overflow and are out of room also. So, you've been taking such good care of her so far, would you mind fostering her until we find her owner or room opens up?"
"Ummm... Yea I guess so, but how will you find her owner?"
"Well we can take down all the info and some pictures of her and post it on our bulletin board and over at the shelter. Hopefully, someone will recognize her."
"Ok. Yea, she can stay with me. She's been nice to have around," a smile whispering across his face.
"All right. Since that's settled let's take a look at her." Her warm, soft hands firmly grasped under the cat's front legs, lifting to look at her belly. "Looks like you've lead a rough life so far, haven't you?"
"What do you mean?" Concern steeps Josh's tone.
"So, I was checking that we are dealing with a girl which it appears we are, and she been unaltered. There would be a little tattoo if she'd been spayed, but there's nothing here. But if you take a look here," she says pointing to the space where the hair was sparse. "It's a smattering of scar tissue. I don't usually see a mess like this, even with strays."
"Is she ok?"
"Oh yes, she's fine. They're all healed. She's just had a hard life at some point. She's probably lucky you found her. Especially, since those kids tried abusing her. Just take good care of her and she'll do fine. Actually, I'm surprised she's this loving. A lot of strays are skittish, and rightfully so, but she seems to have taken a liking to you and trusts you. Keep up the good work."
An oil slick marred the cat's vision, bussing her back in time. Hands and claws ripping at her body. No escape. Paying for the lies of another. Someone else's sins raking across her skin. Fileting her. Rage and fury. Spitting in her face. She tried to fight back, but the restraints were just too tight. Drowning in cement that filled her throat and lungs. Flashes of gold and bronze filling her vision. Laughter chilling her to her core. The warmth sucked away up the fireplace flue. Mutilation at it's finest. Taking pleasure in the ways her body could be wrought. Screams, burning her throat, pleading, begging for an ounce of mercy. Her body broken and twisted, dumped in the gutter. Cursed, if she wasn't lucky enough to die. Ripples of blood wringing from each orifice, the old and new. Yes, death would've been a blessing, but the Gods often declined to shine a ray of mercy on her. She'd given up on herself, but they'd left her behind far before that.
"What name do you have for her?" The women's voices pulls her back from the edge of the nightmare. A name? When had she last had one of those? When they'd stripped her body bare of even its flesh, they'd stripped her name as well.
"She's not my cat. I don't have a name."
"Well just come up with something. It doesn't matter if it's not her real name; we just need something for our records to keep track."
"Diana."
"Interesting."
"Roman Goddess of the wild and the hunt and the moon. Fitting for a black stray cat I'd think."
"I'd be inclined to agree."
Diana? The cat pondered the name. It was a beautiful name, but had it been hers? She had no idea, but supposed it wouldn't matter if it was or not. She only needed to hang around a few days and be on her way. To the next adventure, the next freedom, the next evasion. Diana. It would work for now.
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Velvet Lace part 7
"All right, kitty. You have an appointment with the vet this afternoon, but you'll have to come into work with me first. Think you can behave?" Her mind swirled with thoughts of monotonous tapping on computer keys. Her shoved into a cramped carrier while he flipped through pages of memos and paperwork; unjamming the printer and filling the toner in mechanical silence. Frankly, the idea already had her bored half to tears.
"I don't have a carrier," her ears perked up as the day started looking brighter at his words. "I can carry you in a bag, but you're gonna need to cooperate with me. It'll probably be more comfortable than carrying you in my coat like before. Think we can make that work?" She mewed a reassurance, brushing her cheek to his pant leg. "Okay, you have a choice. Duffle bag or back pack?"
A black snake coiled and flickered the air,moseying closer to inspect. While a valiant effort had been made to clean both, a sharp whiff reveal the tangy breeze of sweat and man after the gym from the duffle bag. Effectively making the decision for her. Pouncing into the backpack, her serpentine tail the only thing still keeping her from disappearce. She turns around and sits down, peeking golden eyes over the zipper at the man.
"I'm gonna zip it a bit, just to make sure you don't fall out. But I promise I won't close it. Trust me?" A meow. Her head popping down into the bag, pulling herself far from the closure to keep her fur safe from snagging. Light shimmered in a spotlight, grazing her whiskers. Amber orbs glowing in the dimness. "All set. Ready to go?" A midnight face poking throught the opening. Strong hands jostling the bag to strap it to his chest. She hadn't thought about it before, but she was glad he wore the bag this way so it was easier for her to watch where they went as he set out down the sidewalk.
Gold weaved through the air on the back of fairies buzzing past. The brisk breeze warmed in their wake. The dim clouds quaking. Afraid of being singed in the light. Windows glistened in the bricked frames as they passed by. The trip was a bit longer than she expected he would've chosen to walk, but not overly so. Her mind flashed back to his naked upper half the night before, and deemed if the lower half matched perhaps this had a part in it, and would surely not complain.
A hand painted window came into view. Colors swirled and collided and crashed like the sea across the glass. The work had obviously taken quite a bit of time and been well preserved. Lettering was often harder than it seemed. She'd seen many take lessons in calligraphy back home and only a few could have been considered truly gifted at it. Whomever had done this work sure could have been one of them. Josh turned, wrenching the door beside the window opened. A tinkling spoke on the air, louder when the door caught on the uneven pavement.
"Josh! How's it going?" A deeper voice boomed from behind a small counter. A graying man stood straight, age having not hunched him over yet, but perhaps only a few years off. He appeared far narrower than someone she would have attributed his voice too, but definitely still healthy. Crinkles graced around his eyes and mouth radiating a kindness leagues deep.
"Hey, Quinn. I'm doing all right. How about you, man? Been a busy morning?"
"About the same as usual. Customers here and there," he answered coming around the counter. "And who do we have here? This the lovely lady you told me about over the phone?" The older man lifting his hand for her to sniff. She didn't even need to, he already felt like a good one off the bat, a rumble coming up from her chest as she stroked her face against his worn soft hand.
"Yep, this is her. We'll check her out at the vet later, see if she has an owner. Though with how dirty she was, I kinda doubt it."
Quinn unzipped the bag as he listened, pulling her out and cuddling her to his chest. His aura exuding peace from every orifice. Her eyes closed, nuzzling down into his palms. "I don't know who would let such a beautiful soul go, but they must be fools, the lot of them."
"You two seem comfortable. Are you sure it's cool if she hangs out with us today?"
"Absolutely, you can bring her in as the bookstore office cat everyday if you'd like. You know I don't get much animal time at home. Steven being allergic and all that. But here he can't stop me," he said with a mischievous glint in his eyes.
"How's he doing?" The conversation wavered off into the void as she took in her surroundings. A bookstore. So this was what he did. It was modest size, with what looked to be a second level up a spiral staircase. She hadn't pinned this as being where he'd work. She wasn't sure why bc in the time she'd known him this felt like a good match. The dark cinnamon stained floors and shelves were the focal point, after the rainbowed colors of the spines lining each shelf. Rich colors of evergreens with the dark sun peeking just over ridge. Dark, but not cold. A warm home with a fire lit in the hearth, logs crackling releasing fireflies into the air. That's how her sould felt in this foreign place, singing to her heart. A home.
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Velvet Lace part 6
Warmth bundling her in its embrace as she sinks deeper into the cushions, eyes drifting into that unconscious realm between worlds. She would have loved to take advantage of the alone time, but who knew when the human man would return, and finding her any which way just wouldn't do. So a nap would have to suffice, and probably desperately needed after his evening of tossing and turning like the sea in a hurricane. Clouds dark, blotting out each star in the sky.
Dreams reveal the soul, but trap you in your greatest fears. They claimed to help your subconscious work through the things the waking mind couldn't face, but not all things were to be solved. Hands groping, pulling hard. The discomfort and pain. Her tail yanked back, trapping her. A tortured mewling frozen in her throat. Dampness in her bright eyes. Clawing, digging. Sticky crimson under her claws. A shriek in the distance. Or was it closer than that? It all seemed underwater now as much as then. Being tossed to the floor, discarded like the broken doll she was, smacking off the floor. The sound of her skin kissing off the ground, echoing rage and panic.
Searing the back of her head as she's snatched up from the floor, tattered and torn. Heart screaming to any angels that still listen, to the stars trying to watch through the clouds, to the earth underfoot that may tremble when she calls; but they remain silent. Silence. Most think of the quiet being the absence of noise, but sometimes the silence was so loud it's shrill screech pierced your ears and ripped away at the loose parts of your being. Haunting you, until its last breath; begging for your life in exchange for its own, even if only for a minute. As if one minute would ever be enough to fix all of the mistakes, all the wrongs that will never be right, and all the injustices thrust upon the oppressed.
One minute could never be enough, but this particular minute, or was it five or 10 or maybe 30? She was never quite sure. Grew longer with each reenactment. Every time it engulfed her, cacooning her, showing her a former life the time stretched like taffy in a puller. A curse upon all those minutes, she wished, when the reality was that she was the only one hexed in that time and following it. Damned was her fate, as it would stay for the faults of another. Bannished from a home, that's near destruction was her ill-starred luck to be blamed for.
"Shhh..." A gentle noise breaking into her dreamscape. The dreams had never changed before, certainly not like this. Not the sounds of static snow on a TV screen. A soothing caress against her side that she flinches from at first, but the kindness tugging her in closer; wrapping her around it from the inside. "It's ok. You're ok." The voice. So calm and mellow. She's heard it before, but in the sleepy fog of her head she's not sure where. It's tenderness willing her eyes open. Blinking up into the new, but familiar face.
"Didn't mean to wake you. Looked like a bad dream though," he says getting up, a grocery bag still wrapped in his hand. A delicate meow floating up on the wings of a butterfly. "I got you food. And a litter box, though I guess you can keep going outside like you seem to have been doing though. It's up to you really. Dealer's choice." Rolling to her feet to follow at a leisurely pace, when his voice echoes to her from down the hallway. "I should probably stop talking to you like another person, shouldn't I? People will start thinking I'm crazy soon otherwise, if they don't already," he said with a laugh his heart wasn't in. Another meowed reaponse. "Or maybe not, maybe you like feeling like a person. You probably wish to rule the world anyways, right?" No. Ruling was never in the cards for her. "Might as well start with your human servant here, I guess."
Her lean black velvet body nudging against his leg. She hoped he knew she appreciated every kindness he was offering to her in a world such a dark gray, rain clouds sparkled in the sun against it. He would not be her human servant, a friend perhaps, but never a servant for her. She didn't deserve such an honor. Then again, neither did many who had those to wait upon them. His arm curling around her body to scoop her from the floor. A throaty purr rumbling her being. His deft fingers scratching just the spot on her head she enjoyed like a warm summer day. Rubbing her cheek to his in gratitude.
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Velvet Lace part 5
The light dances in the window. Dust particles illuminated like glitter in the air, swirling and floating, floating and twisting, twisting and hovering. The sun tiptoes across the floor, up onto the bed like a lover crawling back under the cover before diving in to wrap herself around him. His eyes open to slits, the sight before him startling them wide. Large eyes like light bow rosin stare into his soul, willing his being awake in the creepiest way.
"Jesus!" He exclamation making the cat spring back with the same energy. "You scared me! I'm sorry. It's okay. Come here, kitty." Slowly, with the poise she'd temporarily forgotten she approaches him. He seemed to move quite a bit in his sleep. Not used to sharing a bed, at least not for sleeping, she mused. He'd almost squished her a time or two throughout the night, including a few minutes ago, to which she found no point in trying to go back to sleep and had resigned herself to waiting for him to get up.
"All right kitty, I need to go to the store. I'll pick up some food for you, hopefully you'll still be here," he muttered under his breath. "If not I guess the shelter gets a food donation... Do you eat dry food or wet food, or what?" The cat tilts her head trying to decipher why he seems so nervous about cat food. He was fine last night when he made the decision to save her, then to feed her and let her stay the night. "I guess I'll get both and we'll just have to figure it out? I've never had a cat before, so I really have no clue where to start." Bit of an odd fellow, she thought. Why take in a cat if you don't particularly like them? He does seem nice enough for now, she supposed if he was going to the trouble to get her some food that she could grace him with her presence a bit longer and maybe fatten herself up a bit. She meowed her assurances.
"And I guess on Monday I'll take you in to the vet's office to get checked over and see if you're chipped." She scoffed at the thought, knowing full well she wasn't chipped, but it wasn't as if she could just tell him that. She wasn't particularly fond of the vet idea, but certainly understood why he'd want to take her in. She dreaded the caustic, astringent smells assailing her button kitten nose. That was far worse than any shots they may give her. It always made her nose tingle and burn with the strength of the odors.
He slid to his feet, his upper body still bare. She admitted to herself guiltily that it had a nice feel to it in addition to the definition it flaunted by looks. His back had been so firm, yet comforting to sleep up against the night before. The warmth pooled around him, nuzzling her dreams into peaceful froth. Watercolors staining her mind in rainbows and light. When did she last have a contented night's sleep, she couldn't remember. That's perhaps why she'd gotten too close to him, and how he'd managed to almoat roll atop of her. Her dreams had been too distracted with the tranquility bleeding from him to share with her.
*****
He pulled out the cart, wiping it down. One could never be too careful when so many people were handling it. His list, folded in fourths, now curled at the edges from the battering in his pocket pressing against his thigh. He hated the way the entrance was set up at this store, the doorways barely large enough to fit two carts side by side. And with the angle it was positioned at there was no way to see if anyobe was coming the opposite direction until already in the doorway. Then there was the awkward shuffle to move out of each other's way and not ram your cart into theirs; but it certainly beat driving an extra 30 minutes to another store.
Easing inside, he starts his rounds down each aisle, trying to stay hidden in plain sight where every light feels like a spotlight melting him into the ground. Turning down aisles with multiple people loping around, deciding to skip those aisles and come back. Creeping ever so closely to the pet food aisle. Against the odds, the aisle is empty. Bombarded in a sea of cans and kibble, who knew there would be so many choices? Sorting through his options, digging himself deeper down in his confusion. Maybe he should have down some research before hand. Staring into the abyss, willing a decision that wasn't coming.
"Do you need some help?" The small crinkling voice startling him, snapping him back into the present. He turns to find an elderly woman with her little cart, studying him.
"I found a cat." He wasn't entirely sure why this was what fell from his mouth, but he couldn't exactly take it back now.
"All right. And you're buying food for it?"
His nodding the only answer he can give this stranger.
"Have you had one before?"
"No. This is a first and if I'm being honest, I have no clue where to start."
"Ah. Well my babies like both wet and dry foods. Dry throughout the day and wet for dinner. This is the canned food we get, and these kibbles. They like it well enough."
A timid smile brushes his lips at the small woman so open to helping him. "Do you need me to put some in your cart too?"
"Oh no. We have plenty still, you just seem like a lost soul looking for a life raft. Thought I might help."
Her words stunned him as he looked to this woman with new eyes. "Well thank you. I appreciate it and I'm sure the kitty will too."
"You're welcome, you take good care of her. You fed her, she'll probably stick around now. That's how you get a cat, ya know." She chuckled quietly before moving on down the aisle to complete her own shopping as he did his.
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Velvet Lace part 4
His back ached from bending over to wash out the grime and furry in the tub. It had been a long day and his bones were ready for collapsing. Dragging himself back to the room, the bundle sans cat looked like a melted witch on the corner of the bed. Mystery stirring in him. Where had she gone? Snatching up the damp towel he tosses it into the hamper and shrugs out of his clothes. Rummaging through the drawers, he comes out with a pair of flannel sleep pants to pull on.
She wished she had thought to go outside to the bathroom before her bath because it was quite chilly outside. She made the trip a quick one, scrambling back to the warm blanket the home wrapped her in.
Her feet find themselves in cement shoes in the doorway to the bedroom. Like a beautiful disaster she can't pull her eyes away from, the living muscles rippling with each motion as the man settles his pants into place. They appear well loved and worn, but softer than her own fur as the payoff. She hadn't expected such an appealing shape to his body. Though perhaps she should, having been pressed against him on that walk earlier. But the adrenaline had still been running its race and she'd been trying to look out for herself.
He turns showing off his lean, trim waist, tapering down from broad shoulders. The winter pale marking his skin a beacon. Gleaming in the night, keeping ships from crashing off the rocks. "Oh, there you are." A rumble bringing her back to reality. "Been exploring? Well, now that you're clean, you can sleep up here if you'd like or maybe there's somewhere you've found you like better?" A peculiar man she thought. Most would not speak to a cat, or only in baby talk (or some version of it), yet here was this man holding a one-sided conversation with her. Does he always do this? Does he sense something? Is he just a very lonely man with no one to talk to?
He pulls back the covers, clambering underneath. She wasn't sure how comfortable she was sharing the bed with a virtual stranger; you have to trust someone to sleep near them, but it had been what felt like forever since she'd slept on a bed. Maybe she should just sleep on the couch. That would be the smarter plan, she knew it would be. But that bed, or perhaps it was the beacon of his skin again, was calling to her so fiercely. She could've sworn it was the word of God whispering into her ears. That alone should have made her turn right around and walk out, but she couldn't pry herself away. She watched as he rolled, and bundled himself up into the blanket to go to sleep.
Her paws whispered across the floor, tail flicking back and forth as she approached. A quick bend of the knees snapped her up onto the corner of the bed. A subtle smile tugging his lips at the change weight on the bed. Nuzzling down further into the covers, he quickly is pulled under by the sleep fairies working their magic. Threading dreams through the air. Balmy breezes kissing his body. A woman off in the distance, waiting for him. He can't quite see her, but knows it can't be Rachel. Turning to see what he'd be leaving behind if he goes to her, but looking back to see her disappeared from sight. A warm hand running up his spine, a molten female voice humming in his ear- whispering things he can't quite hold onto.
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Velvet Lace part 3
Lamb softness drowned in the sea of heavier foot falls up the stairs to the bathroom. Josh was surprised that the cat readily followed him. She sashayed from the couch to the doorway, tossing a look over her shoulder. A siren calling to ships off the coast. Her gravitational pull tugging him closer then a rubberband snapping back as she bowed out of the way for him to lead. More surprised at his own reaction, than to her own. It's not that he wasn't an animal person, he just thought light would escape a black hole before he would take on a cat.
A bomb bursting in the dark silence, illuminating the bathroom. Stealing a glance around told her a family member, a sister or mother, perhaps a gay uncle even, most likely helped him decorate. It didn't bleed estrogen, but it seem a bit too well put together for his tastes. From what she could see he liked simple, utilitarian, functional. About like most men single men she'd previously been unfortunate enough to have to waste her time with. This, however, felt homey. Tension seeped from her tail with each blink.
White noise gushed into every crevice, submerging them in the steady beat of water pooling in the tub. Weight leaving her body under the guise of gentle hands. "All right kitty, I'm gonna set you in here. Please don't scratch me or tear my eyes out," he said swearing he saw her whiskers twitch. "I won't fill it very full, I just need enough to get you clean. Okay? Please don't shred me."
Her toes tingled in the warm water, tinkling the tufts of fur. A purr slipping out as she settled in. It was a big tub, but not overly so, but to a cat it might as well be a swimming pool. Hatred and decay churning in ripples, clouding the water. The death spreading out from her. Life seeping its way inside. Muddled time ticking on, but never turning back. Never going back home. She can't, even if she wanted to. It was gone. With everything else. Home. She had not thought of that wretched, heartbreaking, lovely, lonesome, beautiful cesspool in a cat's age. It's better off forgotten, burned from memory all together. It sometimes slips into the mind on a gentle breeze of perfume deep in the night, tickling each crease in her mind. Disguised as a meadow caressing her dreams, only to be reminded of the nightmarish rubble it buried her under.
A citrusy scent floods her senses. Firmly male, but not in an overpowering way. Quiet and subtle. Clean. A sheet of silk she could wrap herself in and luxuriate. His hands skate down her fur, lather in his wake. Massaging the bones that feel far older than they should. Gray foam sullying the water further. Thorough, but careful with her. Her eyes closed, poised for a brief nap. The sultry water cleansing her fluid body.
The pop of a cork and the swirl of the water lost down the drain. Her apathetic internal commentary reminding her he'll probably have to clean the tub after this. Because who knows where she's been. And a backward glance reveals all the lost hair shed, stuck to the walls. Yep. He'd definitely have to clean that up. But not even a frustrated sigh leaks out, parting his lips. No. He simply wraps her in the plush towel from the shelf, rubbing her dry.
"Black cat, huh?" His words interrupting her reverie, bringing her back to herself. "Well, I'm not sure how my luck's going to get much worse right now, but I guess we'll find out." Usually, that stupid superstition made her want to roll her eyes whenever some moron uttered it, but something about his tone made her contain it. She didn't know what was in his heart, but she could feel it wasn't whole. A pain, soft as a rusted knife, radiated from the men showing her such kindnesses. A mew, so quiet she wasn't entirely sure she'd said anything whispered out, a tiny paw tapping his forearm. A tepid smile, winking in her direction. He set the bundle, towel and all at the foot of the bed before adjourning back to the bathroom to clean up the mess she'd made.
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Velvet Lace part 2
The door latches behind him, sealing him in to his lonely tomb. It hadn't seemed that way before when he had the option to spend with someone. Now, it was the albatross about his neck. Air running from his lungs, trying to relieve the tension in his body. His body wasn't as tight as it had seemed before, perhaps the warmth from the cat had soothed somw unseen muscles. The hangers snatched his coat away from him to hide from the light in the closet. He kicks off his shoes, flipping them haphazardly against the wall with a thud.
He had planned on dinner with Rachel, but obviously that wouldn't be in the cards this evening. He was putting off going to the store because, well, people. But he'd would be making a trip tomorrow it would seem. His mind started working through every possible plan to get him in and out of the store the quickest, while still dealing with the fewest people. Early mornings usually marked elderly people, who would ask him down each aisle to hand them something from the top shelf. Or he shuddered to think of the old woman who had him follow her throughout the entire store handing her things and carrying her case of water for her. Maybe Rachel was right and he let people walk all over him. Then there's early afternoons with moms and their broods of children in their soccer uniforms or football or baseball or whatever the hell was currently in season. All still riding that adrenaline, screaming and bounding down each aisle. They always ran into him, or a display with their carts or clumsiness. And the evenings were the couples shopping for the week or for something special for date night. No, he definitely wouldn't be going in the evening. Nope. Certainly not for little bit. He pushed out a resigned sigh, looked like he'd be hanging out with the geriatrics in the morning. "I mean if I walk fast enough after handing them their stuff, it's not like they could catch me, right? And then I won't have to answer all their prying questions. Or turn down them trying to set me up with their daughter that's probably my mom's age," he murmured to himself.
He rolled up his sleeves to his elbows, revealing firm arms. He wasn't what any would consider muscular really, but lean and toned definitely. He yanked open the fridge that was a few years past updating, but still in good condition. He grabbed the pack of chicken breasts sitting as alone as he is, setting it on the counter by the sink. A whiff and click whispered to him from the hallway. Unfamiliar with the noise, he peers around the corner, unafraid of the ramifications a monster might stir. At least he wouldn't have to cook dinner then. A small dark shadow moves gracefully closer to him. The darkness coming for him. His eyes follow the path it pranced down back to the front door and the thing so obvious he had forgotten its existence. The dog door a previous owner had installed. Odd, now that he noticed it, that nothing had ever came in through it before. Until now that is. As before him, sat the grimy cat he had saved but moments ago. She followed him right inside, no fear. Like a small panther, looking for her newest human lackey.
"Well hello there. Fancy meeting you again, but when I said go do whatever, I meant not in my house." A cat whispered her meow into the air, twisting and curving, caressing his very soul before settling in his ears. At least he wouldn't have to be alone. "You're probably hungry, yea? From the looks of it you've been outside a while. All right, let me see what I've got you can eat." After a quick survey he decides on rice and chicken for the both of them, unseasoned for the cat.
He sets it on a small plate intended to hold a teacup that he doesn't own and places it beside the couch where he sits with his own food. Flipping through the channels, he stops on a show he won't be tempted to change back and forth from so he can just focus on eating. He looks to his furry companion, her rucked up tail flickering as she looks to the screen in what he could only call a human gesture. "Is this show to your liking your highness?"
A meow peeps quietly before her attention turns to her food. It had been a bit since she'd had chicken or rice or anything really cooked. She'd been scavenging for a while, catching the creepy crawlies people tried to keep out of their homes and when she couldn't find any she settled for grass and weeds. Lord, was she sick of eating weeds. She wished he would have seasoned her food like his own, but beggars can't be choosers and she'd take what she could get.
*****
His plate long since ditched on the coffee table, he'd become fully entrenched in the show before him. Not even noticing the creature slithering up inconspicuously onto the cushion beside him. The soft cushions melding around her tender bones. She could nearly die here of comfort. She realized how pathetic that thought was and pushed away. She was a great hunter that made a conscious decision and soft couches and bedding unfortunately hadn't been a part of that in a long while, but perhaps she might convince this human to take pity on her; even if only for a day or two. He hadn't kicked her out yet, and he'd fed her. All on top of having saved her from those urchins with the rocks. If there weren't so many people around, she might have handled them herself. Alas, there were too many complications that would go with that, and she certainly didn't need anymore of those in her life at the moment. No, this man would be as simple as it got for her and she'd take advantage of it while she could. It had been pure luck he lived alone, but a welcome sight. The fewer she had to interact with the better.
He looked so warm and cozy, she couldn't help it. She inched her way closer and closer before settling herself in his lap. His hand idly rested on her, hypnotically stroking her. The pleasure of being rubbed so gently made her want to melt into a puddle in his lap. Stretching her neck she rubs her dirty face against his jeans. A vibration taking hold of both of them before his brain really understands what's happening.
"You're a good kitty, but we need to clean you up a bit it you're going to stay in the house tonight." Her heart soared at the mention of staying inside the heated home. And a bath? When did she last get a bath? Doing the math in her head, everything came to a screeching halt with how disgusted she was in herself. Too long, the answer was way too long. Yes, she would definitely take him up on his offer. She didn't usually like getting her fur wet, but she would absolutely make an exception and let him do whatever he wanted if she could not smell so badly anymore. No, she took back that thought. She'd learned the Gods would often take w/e opportunity laid out before them to trifle with mortals. No. Not anything. But perhaps most things, as long as within reason. She had her pride after all.
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Velvet Lace part 1
"You're ridiculous, Josh! When will you ever grow up and start taking life seriously? You're a nice guy, but I really just can't do this anymore." Fire puffing from her throat with each rising word.
"Baby, what do you mean? Are you breaking up with me?" A frantic bird trapped in his rib cage.
"Yes! That is exactly what's happening here. You let everyone push you around. You sit at a desk all day long at some dead end job that you're never going to leave, then you go home and loaf around your house every evening. I practically have to beg you to come over for dinner a few times a week. And the lord knows you aren't going out and socializing with people. I can't take it anymore. I need to see and talk to people and not over a headset playing video games. Real people, Josh. Face to face people. I keep trying to draw you out of the house and you shut me down from every direction." The heat pulsing off her lean body, engulfing him in flames.
"But I'll try to be better, I just don't handle a lot of people well." The desperation clawing its way up from his feet, where his stomach has run and hidden.
A heavy breath quenching some of the flames in her eyes. "I know you don't, and I know you also can't really change either. And that's why it'd be best if we just call it right here and now. I'm not happy, and I know you can't be either, especially not if I make you act like someone you aren't. I hope you can understand that."
His pursed lips quickly roll under and disappear, trying to hide with his stomach. A small nod his only response. Leaning, he swipes his jacket from the back of her couch, not even bothering to put it on before trudging out the door with a solid snick.
Home. He needs to get home. He needs to get there before the world caves in around him, devouring him whole. The darkness blinding him, never to see the light again.
The blustery wind tossing his shaggy hair like a ragdoll. His sneakers carrying a world's weight, dragging him down the sidewalk. Voices growing around the corner from an alleyway he passed several times a week. The plastic of trash bags rustling and boxea tumbling over getting louder with each step closer. Stepping around the corner, he's horrified by the sight before him. The teens lined up, rocks drawn back at the ready. A dark shadow, trying to cram itself behind the obstacles in the alcove. An escape not revealing itself to the small creature. The offending rock flying straight towards its target.
Before he can even think better of it, Josh rushes forward pushing the kids apart. He flings himself in front of the frightened furball, sheilding it as the 2nd and third stones fly his way. Bruises sure to appear later tonight, but the palpable relief in a cat's face clear and making it worth the pain.
An audible gasp from behind him. "Get out of here kids! I don't know what you're thinking, but just leave. Now!" Rage steeping every note. Scuffling and panic filling the opening behind him. A glance tossed over his shoulder finding himself alone with the furry victim.
Kneeling down, a hand extended to the creature. Fur ruffling along its back, hissing at the new enemy before it. "It's okay, kitty. I'm not gonna hurt you," he says rubbing his fingers together. "I just want to get you out of here in case they come back. Then you can run off to do whatever cat stuff you were planning."
A sense of understanding coming over the furry companion, the back relaxing down, sniffing the air surrounding his fingers. Inching closer, bumping the finger tips with an icy nose. The fluffy cheek warming them again. "Good kitty. That's right, I'm not gonna hurt you." The hand traveling over the back, brushing a plume of dust and grime into the air. "Can I pick you up? Will you let me?" He says patting a hand under the belly, lifting it when it didn't appear it would try to scratch him.
Stepping away from the shadows, the sun stings his eyes. The wind still whipping around, he tucks the cat into his jacket to shield it. The delinquents nowhere to be seen, but he reasons they may still be close by. A soft rumble, vibrating his person. A furry face peeking out, watching where her human carriage is taking her.
Just spitting distance from his home, a modest colonial with a small front yard and a bigger promise of yard in the back, Josh removes her from the security of his side. Setting her on the ground, the rough sidewalk grinding into his knees. Trying to become a part of him that can walk away from the grass clippings in the summer and leaves in the fall and trash bags all year round. He gives her a once over again, reassuring himself she doesn't need medical attention. Her whiskered cheek rubbing him in gratitude, marking him with her scent. Leaping and dancing on her back feet to touch him just under his scuffed knees as he stands.
"Well, you look all right, so I suppose this is where we part ways," he says with a smile. "Go off and do whatever it is cats do, just beware of strangers." His head loose on his bobblehead neck when he realizes he's holding a conversation with a cat. He turns, trotting up the steps of the home and inside.
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Pixie Love Note part 13
Amanda stepped through the door, shoving it closed with her foot. The smell of white paper bags stuffed into a carboard box battling the savory meals contained within. "Hey guys, I got some food while I was out. Hope you're still hungry."
"When aren't we hungry?" Gage already hopping up from his seat to take the precious cargo she carried.
"Fair enough. But you might wanna watch it or you'll start getting that pudge," she said with teasing smile only for him.
"Where'd you go?" Pete starts pulling bags and passing them around the table.
"Duke's." She says simply leaving the conversation there.
"God, they have good food. I might sell my own soul for a piece of their pie."
"Which one," Mags asks.
"Any of them. Good pie's worth a soul don't you think? I don't think I'd be upset with that trade."
Amanda's eyes find her brother's watching her steadily. A subtle nod of understanding that everyone else misses, so engrossed in the food before them. Her little cat's paws whisper down the hallway to the table in the kitchen. She knows he'll follow even if he doesn't need to, but he will. He wants to know, she sees and sea swirling the sand up from the depths in those eyes much like her own. He'll follow. He can't help himself.
Firm steps creak worn floor boards, eating up the distance. "So? How was she?" His rough voice a feather weighing the a metric ton on his shoulders. So quiet it's barely there, yet the only thing really in the room.
"She's fine. She's scared."
"Of me?"
"No, I think she's scared of herself."
"What? That doesn't make any sense."
"Listen Jace, she feels something and she doesn't want to. There's something there. I don't know what it is, but I can see it consuming her. She'll be ok. She'll come around, you just have to give her the time to realize she's being stupid, but she will."
"So you talked to her?"
"Yea, I talked to her. I told her she needs to talk to you. She knows she does, just let her straighten herself out first, okay?"
"Yea. Are you tired?"
"I'm fine, Jason."
"Maybe you should go up and lay down for a bit."
"I'm fine, I'm just gonna sit her for a minute and catch my breath, because y'all are a bunch of pigs that put away my body weight in food," she said getting a chuckle from him before he nodded heading back to his friends. She turned back to the island, looking down at the palms of her hands, praying for God to not leave her brother alone. She found herself doing that a lot lately. Others prayed for a miracle, a cure, a tumor to magically disappear. She didn't. She wasn't ready to die, but she'd fought a long while already, longer than most in her position got to. She prayed for a miracle, but not for herself.
*****
"Piper?" A deep voice rumbled behind her. A wave of electricity shot from the top of her head through to her feet. Her head swiveled away from the magazine in her lap up into the tan face that stole her breath each time.
"Jason. I mean Wulf."
"You can call me Jason if you'd like to. I like the way it sounds when you say it."
Heat stole across her cheeks. "Ok. What are you doing here? Is Amanda all right?"
"Oh yea, she's ok. Well as ok as she can be I guess. She just had an appointment to check in. What about you?"
"Well, it would seem someone knocked over the pitcher of Ranch dressing in the walk- in. Delia slipped and fell, so she's in back getting some X-rays to make sure nothing's broken right now. I volunteered to drive her."
"That certainly was nice of you, mind if I sit with you while we wait?" His large hand she sometimes fantasizes about late at night gesturing to the empty seat beside her.
"Ummm... Yea." She scrambles to move her purse out of his way.
His tall, lithe form folding into the seat. "So, are we gonna talk about the other day, or pretend it never happened?"
She knew she would need to talk to him, if she hadn't been so exhausted last night she might have even texted him first. But it looked like right here and in person was in the cards for her instead. She nodded.
"Well? Is everything okay?" His gentle voice tentative.
"No. Yes. I'm not sure."
"All right. Where would you like to start?" His brow creased in concern.
"I like you, really I do."
"Good, because I like you too," his smile brightening up every facet of his face.
"But I don't want anything from you."
"That's one of the things I like about you."
"No, I mean... I'm not sure what I mean really, but I just want to be friends and I screwed that all up."
"Why do we have to be just friends? What's wrong with a bit more than that?"
"Because one day you might want a bit more than that... And... And I can't give you that?"
"Why can't you? Am I so unlovable?"
"No," she said adamantly. "But that's the problem. I can't give you the love you're going to deserve from someone. And I can't do that to you. I can't steal that away from you."
"So, if you're so certain about this decision, why sleep with me at all? I was fully prepared to put you to bed and leave, but you asked me to stay. And now you can barely even look at me." Her eyes snap to his.
"I thought I was having a dream..." She quietly admits.
"Oh so you dream about me, huh?" The crimson coloring her face answering his question where words fail. "But you can't be with me?"
"That's right."
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why can't we be together? Why can't we try and just see where all of this goes?"
"We... We just can't. Okay?"
"No. Not okay. Tell me why."
"I can't. It's complicated. I can offer friendship, but nothing more."
"What could be so complicated? Just talk to me."
Before she could respond a young woman came out from the back, her wrist wrapped in a brace. She waved the sheathed hand to Piper that she was finished. The dark haired beauty snagged her purse up off the ground. "I have to go, we have to get back to work, but you can text me tonight. I may even answer," she says with a smirk he thought about calling her bluff on. But before she could think better of it she leaned down to peck a chaste kiss to his cheek. His eyes widened in surprise. "Friends, right?" Words had left him stranded on the desert island in his mind. His throat tight, his mind flustered, he nods his ascent.
Piper strides across the waiting room to the girl watching them from the doorway. He can hear bits of the muffled conversation.
"Who's the hottie?" Delia, he thinks is what Piper said name was, asks.
"Ummm... He's... He's a friend."
"Wish I had friends that looked like that."
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The Danger with Faeries and Mortals part 22
"May we get dressed, or will our departure need to be expedited?"
"We would prefer sooner rather than later, but yes, you may change your clothing," the small female says.
"Are you able to make yourselves scarce while we handle such matters?"
"Oh. Yes, of course."
"We'll... Just wait over there," Anton answers for the group, waving towards a seating area.
"Thank you," Joseph says with a tight nod. "Rebecca do you require assistance?"
"Perhaps a bit, but we certainly cannot bring the servants up here to find them," apprehension creasing her brow.
"No, I suppose not. Would you be oppose to my help?" Color dancing across the apples of her cheeks. Her eyes hiding from his own. "It's all right my dear, maybe the small lady faerie can help?"
"No, it's... It's all right. You may assist me." Her gaze finally lifting. "But if it would please, my lord, can we go simpler?"
"My dear, you can speak plainly to me. You're my wife, not some serving girl. We'll have none of this 'if it pleases my lord', what pleases you?"
"I would like very much to not have to constrict myself into a corset."
A warm smile crinkled the skin around his eyes. "Then never wear one again, if that's what you wish."
"But it is not proper of a lady."
"I worry not about what is proper, but what shall make you happy. Besides, I may be the hand of the King, but it's not as if I'm that highly thought upon. The people will be more concerned for your marriage to me than the outrage of you not being properly dressed. Now come on, let us try to get ready. There should be some clothes in the armoire for you."
She opens the armoire, smothering her in colors and shades across the spectrum, pulling out a deep purple shift. "Joseph, can you assist me in untying the back of this gown, I can't quite reach."
"Absolutely," he says turning from where he had situated himself with his back to the girl. His quiet, easy strides announcing his approach. His warm hands scorching her skin as they brush against the space between her blades. She wonders if she'll ever not feel like her skin is being licked up by flames again around this man. Some thing deep inside her telling her it is unlikely; that she'll drown in this inferno, catching only glimpses of the swirling, sunlit pools of his face and incinerates. "There. Do you require more assistance?" Words failing her, she swallows the rock in her throat, shaking her head. "All right. Let me know." The kindness, a warm salve in his voice.
Tugging and pulling, the gown skates over her skin falling to the ground. Tossing a quick glance over her shoulder, she sees the tension marking his shoulders as he ridgely keeps his back to her, giving her some modicum of privacy. Slipping into the plum dress, the silken fabric tickling her skin. "Joseph? Would you help me button up the back?"
"Yes, of course." He meets her across the room. Rebecca holding the loose bodice to her softness. She turns, lifting her hair over her shoulder to give access to the buttons. The opening parenthesized by the shimmering buttons. The fabric waiting to be nipped together ending at her lower back. With shaky hands he seizes both pieces. His fingers caressing her flawless skin, she flinches in surprise. His sharp intake of breath giving away the effect of her skin against his own has. "My apologies," when he can speak again.
She nods. "It's all right. It just surprised me, is all."
Finishing the final button, his hands slide back down to her waist, turning her to face him. He releases her from his clutches, that beg to pet more of the silken material covering her feminine form. "All done my dear." Holding out his hand to her, he asks "shall we let our... guests lead us to Fairy?" She says nothing, but entwines her hand with his.
*****
"How do the people not see you?" Joseph gestures to the cloaked faeries surrounding them.
"The cloaks hide most of the wings, and humans only see what they want to see anyways. Perhaps, they'll see a flicker of wing as we pass or the shimmer in our hair or maybe even a glow from our skin or eyes, but they'll find some way to explain it away," the female faerie answers.
"So the faeries are all around us and we're just blind to what's in front of us?"
"No, there aren't many fae her anymore. But if there were then yes. It makes it easier for the few of us that slip in and out anyways."
"So the faeries really are gone from here?"
"Obviously, we still make trips in from faerie for our own purposes, but yes. We don't stay here anymore."
"Why not?"
"The heinous beast."
"The heinous beast?"
"Yes, the one she was to marry."
"My brother? What does he have to do with the faeries?"
"Enough chatting. We'll be there soon," Anton chimed in. "The Queen will explain."
They turn a corner into an empty alleyway. The rough cobblestones marking a faded path. "This ia it? Where is the entryway? It's empty."
"Not quite. There's a portal at the end, only the fae can open it, so the humans just think it's another dead end stone wall, but it's there. It's always there."
"So this is why you all always seemed to just disappear when we would follow you?" A swift nod. "May I?"
"Certainly, but it'll just be like every other wall here."
Joseph approached the wall indicated, reaching a tentative hand towards the space that wasn't real. His hand swirling the illusion like milky glass. "It's cool to the touch," he says turning back to the waiting fae. Confusion marking their faces. "What? Is something the matter?" Rebecca now looking into their faces as well.
"You... You..." Stammers one of the faeries.
"You can enter Fairy," a look of awe stark on Anton's face.
"But how?" Asks the female.
"What do you mean he can enter Fairy? I thought you said he couldn't open the portal," Rebecca asks.
"He shouldn't be able to."
"So, you weren't doing that to show to him?"
"No, he did that all on his own." Turning back to the small man. "Are you fae?"
"I don't believe so. I've never heard story of my mother or father having any fae blood."
Anton clears his throat, regaining his composure. "Well, we should be going. I suppose if you may enter Fairy on your own that you may come to meet our queen. Perhaps she can give some insight to this situation."
Stepping through the portal revealed a land with brighter colors than Joseph would've imagined. Gilded walkways, the sun raining down from the tree tops. Clouds swirling like ink across the skies. A cluster of orange glinting in his periphery. He crouches down to examine the treasures hidden.
"What is it Joseph?"
"A citrine." He lifts it to her to see.
"It's beautiful. Do they line this whole place?" She asks the group of fae.
"No. Not particularly. No more than anywhere in the human realm. Someone must have dropped it recently. Come, let's be going. Your mother awaits."
*****
"Your majesty, we have received word from the front gate that the garrison has returned with two."
"Two? They should have only been bringing my daughter to me. Is this other fae in need of medical attention?"
"No, your highness. It would appear not, but he... he... holds the girl's hand."
"The girl? You mean your princess?"
"I would assume."
"Why would a fae be with the Princess, let alone holding her hand? Tell me more of this man." The fae guard tells of all that he was told, which wasn't much. "Very well, see them in."
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Pixie Love Note part 12
"Shit!" Piper slams the heel of her palm into the rim of her steering wheel. "Damnit! What was I thinking? I never should've fallen asleep. That damn dream, well guess it wasn't a dream really. Shit. Shit, shit, shit! I can't go down this road again. How do I fix this?"
Her phone shoved in the side of her purse, at least she'd remembered to grab that, started chirping. A text message. Blindly, fumbling around she dug out the cheap phone and lit up the screen. Wulf. Shit. She couldn't talk to him now. Could she ever talk to him again? Her face heated at the flashes of the night before filling her mind. No. They were supposed to be just friends and she had to go and ruin that. A heavy sigh leaking out. But she couldn't just abandon him with everything going on with Amanda. She'd just have to put him back on his side of the fence. No overly friendly conversations. Keep it basic. Surface relationship.
With a plan in mind some of the tension rolled out of her shoulders. She uncurled herself from around her steering wheel to finally sit back in her seat. His smell enveloped her, she pulled the collar of his shirt up, taking a whiff. Damn shirt. "And what right does someone that good looking that can play music that well have to smell this good," she muttered to herself, placing both hands back on the wheel. She'd just have to breathe through her mouth or something and change when she gets home.
*****
Wulf came down the stairs, quiet, but a dark cloud obviously hanging over his head.
"Still nothing from her," Pix prodded her brother gently. Her tiny hand resting on his shoulder.
Not bothering to open his mouth, he solemnly shook his head. And gave her a one-sided sad smile.
"She'll call. I know she will." Amanda pats his shoulder like he might break if she's too rough with him right now.
"And if she doesn't?"
"She will. Just keep trying. She's probably just scared right now. She'll come around."
Exhaling a heavy breath, he nods. "The guys are supposed to stop by in a bit."
"Ok. I'll step out for a bit, so you can discuss business without worrying over me," she said giving him a pointed look. His only response, the brilliant smile that always lit up a room and a small chuckle.
Amanda gathered the clothes her brother had reverently folded and laid on the corner of the table in the foyer, shoving them into a bag. "I'm gonna see if I can drop these things off at her job for her, all right? She probably wants her shoes back at least." Wulf mumbled his agreement.
A car rumbled up the driveway as she grabbed the shoes from the floor and her purse from the hook. She opened the door in time to see Tyler jumping onto the porch.
"Hey, Pix," he drawled spotting the shoes and bag in her hands. "Well I know you aren't heading to the gym bc Wulfy would've locked you up if he suspected such a thing. And let's be real, you're only going running if something's chasing you," he teased. "So, you got a hot date you're trying to impress with those sneaks? Or this?" He snaked a bra out of the bag tucked under her arm, a smug look twisting his features.
"Nope. Just returning some things."
"Oh. So it was a hot date already? My my Pix, didn't know you were swinging that way these days. How things change, proud of you," he gives her a conspiratorial smile.
"Wasn't my hot date, I'm just the delivery girl. House is all to you boys, I'll be back later," Amanda stated before snagging the bra from his hand and stuffing it back into her bag as she walked around him. Waving a hand, calling hello to Pete and Gage as she slid into her car. Charlie and Mags pulling in shortly after.
Tyler lets himself in the door, the rest trudging in behind him. Wulf nestled in the corner of the couch; his bandmates plopping down around him.
"So Pix said you had a date last night, and she's doing your walk of shame for you?" Tyler's brows inched towards his hairline.
"I don't really want to get into it, can we just work," Wulf growled.
"Oooo touchy," Pete teased.
"Didn't perform so well last night," Gage goaded.
"I'm not talking about this right now."
"Anyone we know," Charlie asked.
Wulf let out a heavy sigh, relenting that he wouldn't get out of this conversation without giving something up to them. "Remember the girl a few months back that dipped out before I woke up?"
"I think I remember you mentioning something about some not-so-clingy chick over breakfast," Maggie answered. "What about her?"
"She lives nearby. Other end of town from what I've gathered. Her and I have been talking for a while now. Friends, ya know? It made me feel better having someone nearby that could check on Pix."
"So, what? She wants money from you," Tyler asked.
Wulf shakes his head. "No, she doesn't want anything from me," awe tinging his voice.
"Is she gonna sell everything about Pix to the gossip mags," Gage asked, suddenly concerned.
"No. She says it's not her business to share, especially if we don't want to."
"Ya know, sharing that stuff could've turned out badly," Charlie chided.
"I know, but at the time none of it mattered to me."
"Ok Wulf, so what's the problem," Mags asked gently.
"She said no strings attached back when we were on tour, well she came over last night to eat with Pix and I and just chill. And well one thing turned into another and now Pix is doing my walk of shame."
"So, she lied and wants a relationship now," Pete asked.
"Oh man, you dog," Tyler laughs. "You kicked her out without her bra or shoes?"
"This is why we don't bring ladies back to the domicile," Gage added.
"No, I didn't kick her out. She left on her own."
"So, what's the problem," from Pete.
"She ran out, like she was on fire."
"Wait, wait, wait. So she left, no strings attached, no promises to call, couldn't get out of here fast enough," Tyler clarified.
At Wulf's quiet nod, Gage chimes, "Man you really are losing your touch. So bad you're running 'em right out the door." Pete snickering beside him.
"Ok so, what's the problem? Sounds like a dream, if I hadn't seen Pix carrying out the evidence I might've thought you had been."
"She ran from me."
"Yea, but you don't have to worry about it now, move on to the next one."
"Hey," Mags reaches over to touch Wulf's forearm. "Can we get something together to eat right quick?" He nods before getting up. "No worries guys, you get started. We'll be right back," she adds to the rest with a sweet smile.
"What did you want to eat?"
"I'm not really worried about food, though I am starving. I'm worried about you," she says just above a whisper.
"Why are you worried? I'm fine," giving her a smile that didn't reach his eyes.
"Don't lie to me. You're upset and I think I know why," giving him a pointed look.
"Why would I be upset? You heard the guys, I'm living the dream."
"Oh, please. Don't insult me. It may be their dream, but I can see in your eyes it isn't yours, so want to tell me why?"
"Not really, but you're not gonna let me out til I tell you are you?"
"You don't have to tell me if you really don't want to, but I would like to help you. You should have at least one person, besides your sister, who knows what's up."
He pushes his hands through his long golden hair before drooping his shoulders. "Fine. Fine. Her name's Piper. She was auper cool when we got together on tour and wanted to talk about more than just how hot I was and how we'd be together forever. She left her phone number, but not in a pushy way, more just a 'here it is if you need it' kinda way. And when Pix called I found it and I did need it. We were all drowning in that grief and I needed someone not immersed in it, so I texted her. And we've been talking pretty regularly ever since. She's been holding me at arm's length though. I feel like she's not telling me a lot about herself for some reason and made it clear she just wanted to be friends. She's not after the money or any fame, she's just Piper. She's sweet and funny and cares about things. I asked her to come eat dinner last night. And well she made a half asleep move on me and I reciprocated and then this morning she freaked out and ran out the door like a bat out of hell before I could even catch her."
"So you like her, like really like her? And she doesn't feel the same?" The look he gives her answers the questions all on its own. "Aww baby, come here." Maggie pulls his large body in for a comforting hug.
"What if I've lost her from my life now?"
"I'm sure you haven't lost her. You just need to take a step back for a minute. She's obviously physically attracted to you, you'll just have to show her she's attracted to the rest of you too. Have you called her?"
"Yea, but she won't answer me."
"Just give her some space, let her come to you again maybe."
"Thanks Mags. Now I guess we should get that food before those vultures come sniffing around."
"There's the friend I know and love," giving him a quick smile as she releases him from her bear hug.
*****
Piper was tied on her apron, change jingling in the pocket. Pens clanking, hing across the edge, when a petite women walked in from the light. The door closing, settling the entryway in shadows revealed fairy-like Amanda standing there, looking straight at Piper with a crease in her forehead. The tiny woman marched over to the counter between them.
"Hi Amanda," Piper greets in a meek voice. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been this nervous.
"Hey," she returns a gentle smile. "You left in a rush this morning, thought you might need these?" She holds up the sneakers for the server to see. "Brought the rest with me too, but you probably want to just shove it in your truck."
Piper's cheeks redden at the memory of what all she left behind and why. "I'm sorry about this morning."
"No need to apologize to me. Jason on the other hand, you may want to answer one of those calls or texts from him."
"I... I... I just can't. I don't know what I would even say to him."
"Maybe start with why you ran out this morning?"
"Friends. We were just supposed to be friends and nothing else. And I screwed that up."
"What's wrong with more than just friends? You're two consenting adults. And Jase would kill me for sharing this with you, but I'm pretty sure he'd be into that too."
"That's exactly the problem. I can't love him. I can't love anyone, and he deserves to find someone who can. I can't keep him from that."
"No one says you have to love him right now. No one expects you to, but maybe one day you will, what's so wrong about loving him?"
"I just... I just can't. It'd be better for him to break from that now. Please. I don't want to hurt him. I've used up my allotment. I can't be that for him, I just can't." Desperation filling each of her words.
"Ok fine, but you still need to talk to him. Explain it to him. Because Jase is loyal to a fault and has a hard time letting go without good reason. You need to give him that reason. I'll go put that bag in your truck. And can I place a to-go order?"
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What Dreams may Come
She squirmed under the heat of his gaze. Each button burst from her shirt, scattered on the bed and floor. The high waisted skirt bunched up around the dip in her curves. The lace of her bra barely shielding her pebbled nipples from his sight. One thigh rubbing up her other one, giving herself the illusions of modesty.
The tremor in his hand the only thing giving him away. He wanted to touch all of her like he had in each of his fantasies since they met. But where to start? The look in his eyes like a man starved near to death seeing his first meal.
With slow measure he reaches for the lapel of her shirt, tugging her up from the mattress. He peels the shirt from one shoulder, trapping her hands behing her back. His sizzling lips scorching her down her neck, pausing at her pulse point he nips at. A moan rumbling out her. Those perfect lips follow the shirt's path over the tight shoulder and down her palpitating chest. His hand moving to her knee and starting a painful slow ascent up her inner thigh. Swirling circles, barely there on her skin. A flush rising to her creamy skin. Goosebumps dance across its suppleness. A whimper coasting from her lips. A satisfied groan answering her call.
The heat building between her thighs searing his fingers. The sweetness of her flesh clinging in his nose. Pushing her back to lay on the bed he swept down her body, pulling each breast over the cups. Lavishing one and then the other with his tongue. Setting his teeth gently around that hardened bead. "God, I've had dreams about these tits," he said huskily. "Probably more than I should admit to." A sly smirk on his face. His hand readjusting a jean clad bulge.
"Then take it. Take all of it, but please do it now. I don't think I can wait anymore," she struggles to break her hands free of the shirt around her wrists. She curses emphatically when she can't get loose. Her hands dying to thread themselves through hair as dark a midnight as her own.
"Oh fuck no. I've waited literal years for this moment, baby. I finally got you here, and I'm gonna enjoy it."
"You can enjoy it anytime, but please..." She trails off in a gasp as his finger brushes over her apex. Her hips wriggling to find him again, to quench the burn deep in her core.
He kneels between her legs, hands still at her thighs. A ripple in her belly as his roughened hands glide up the smooth, damp velvet of her skin. His grin turning wicked at the sight. His fingers curl around the elastic of the matching lace panties, pulling them down. Her body helping him remove them of their own volition. Corded muscle wrapping around her legs, pulling her to the bed's edge, so he could spill her over her own. Baring her to him. Better than any of his dreams could have conjured.
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