juliatypesoutloud

[juliatypesoutloud]

Blank Pages

It always starts with a blank page, doesn't it? We come out of the womb with no agenda, no demands, no plans, no schedule, no to-do list.  So at what point does someone tell us what to write? Our influences are many: parents, siblings, peers, girlfriends, boyfriends, pets, teachers, all with agendas and plans of their own (yes, you know your pets have their own agendas -- sometimes that involves you laying on the couch all day with them, but still...).  Which influence do we bend to? Which do we ignore? And which do we absorb as if it is our own?

And at what point do we realize that maybe, just maybe, we have enough knowledge and awareness to create our own pages? As a toddler, when we finally stand on our own two feet and are manipulated into walking a particular straight line, so we sit down in defiance? As a teenager, when the world feels like it belongs to us and nothing and no one can tell us what to do, so when someone does, we turn our head in defiance? Or maybe as a young adult in our first job, where the boss doesn't know it all, how could she possibly, she's never worked the trenches like we are, so we quit that job in defiance?

Or maybe, as a toddler, we put one foot in front of the other with a goal to moving forward, not looking back, a brand new world in front of us.  Or as a teenager, we join with other teens and learn a sense of community by donating our time to a cause or a population, or connect with like-minded kids who enjoy theater, electronics, political science or, hey, woodworking.  Or as a young adult, we discover a way to combine our passion with a career, a focus, a need greater than ourselves.

So where and when does that get lost?  When does the joy, the community, the focus get misplaced and drops off the page? Does a chapter get re-written? No, it’s still there. It still developed our sense of self, however it was inscribed. It’s easy to look back and say “shoulda, woulda, coulda,” but can’t we start on a new blank page whenever we want? Who says we can’t?  

And who says what needs to be on that page? Can’t it contain compassion? Can’t it erase our fears? Map a new world? Find a new purpose?  Or go back and find the purpose, the courage, the compassion we may have had in earlier chapters?

Can we step away from who social media tells us we should be? Can we remember what it’s like to start with a blank page? To create ourselves from ourselves, not in the image of someone else? Can we take all the good things in the world and glom onto them like we do the latest Instagram story?  

Sometimes it’s as simple as doing an unexpected act of kindness for someone else (pay for the person behind you in the drive-thru), contribute to community (drop off those old sneakers to a donation site), rejuvenate the senses (walk into a real live bookstore and feel the energy), up the laugh endorphins (go see a feel-good movie in the middle of the day), or stimulate your creativity (drive through your neighborhood and imagine the stories your neighbors are writing). Oh, and cuddle your pet 😊

We just need to turn the page.  See the blankness, the possibilities, the change in direction, the compassion for others/yourself, the respect towards the populace. Stem that turning negative tide before it consumes us all.  The world will feel it.  You’ll feel it.  And you’ll pop out of bed every morning, eager for that next blank page.  Now go write something.