juliuscaesarsalad

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This came to me in a dream. Has probably been done before and has probably been done better but idc

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this douchey manchild is my historical blorbo

taken from 1x 04, 4x12, 5x06. horrible histories is available on disc and bbc iplayer. i am promoting your show do not copyright me

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i had an achilles phase

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“Patrochilles is real,” I say into the mic, the crowd boos. I begin to walk off the stage in shame. “No, she’s right!” I hear a voice in the back say. The lights come on. It's Alexander the Great.

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isnt it strange to know that shipping patrochilles u have something in common w plato and alexander the great

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i just think it's neat that odysseus gets put in a position where he has to kill his child to avoid going to war and he can't do it and then agamemnon gets put in a position where he has to kill his child to go to war and he does it

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made another one

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I made a uquiz assigning you kin with an epic Greek hero

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27th december 2020, aka the great italian shitposting about nicia, the most famous bottom from pompeii

how it started:

context: the insult was “nicia cineade cacator”, “nicia the inverted shitter”.

the memes that followed:

spoiler: they did, in fact, end up finding a dead body next to the cavern. rip to nicia, the gay from pompeii. rip bottom king 

ps: original op reached out to the commenter and assured them it was all in jest

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i want to share with you some of my favourite graffiti from Pompeii

“Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!“ 

“Amplicatus, I know that Icarus is buggering you. Salvius wrote this.“ 

“We two dear men, friends forever, were here. If you want to know our names, they are Gaius and Aulus.“

“Floronius, privileged soldier of the 7th legion, was here. The women did not know of his presence. Only six women came to know, too few for such a stallion.“

“On April 19th, I made bread.“

“ I have buggered men.“

“If anyone does not believe in Venus, they should gaze at my girlfriend.“

“It took 640 paces to walk back and forth between here and there ten times.“

“Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rub together so much that they hurt worse than when they every have before!“

“Epaphra is not good at ball games.”

“Two friends were here.  While they were, they had bad service in every way from a guy named Epaphroditus.  They threw him out and spent 105 and half sestertii most agreeably on whores.“

“Secundus likes to screw boys.“

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fic trope tag game

i was tagged by @juliacaesaris (thanks so much babe <3)

rules: just bold your preferences for fic tropes

slow burn or love at first sight // fake dating or secret dating // enemies to lovers or best friends to lovers // oh no there’s only one bed or long-distance correspondence // hurt/comfort or amnesia // fantasy au or modern au // mutual pining or domestic bliss // smut or fluff // canon-compliant or fix-it // reincarnation or character death // one-shot or multi-chapter // kid fic or road trip fic // arranged marriage or accidental marriage // high school romance or middle-aged romance // time travel or isolated together // neighbors or roommates // sci-fi au or magic au // body swap or genderbend // angst or crack // apocalyptic or mundane 

tagging: @ronance-dingus @buckyflippingbarnes @awholelotofbooks @nataliaromonava @kingsteve01 @zombiecap @dykebucky

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Bust of Antinous. AD 130-50. Roman. marble. Fitzwilliam Museum.      http://hadrian6.tumblr.com

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tag game!

i got tagged by @juliacaesaris (ty so much <3!!) to describe my blog:

1. icon: ahaha it’s legit a terribly photoshopped version of the pun that is my url that i made in like... 2017? 

2. content: classics!! mostly mythology and ~aesthetic~ pictures i think,,, but it’s all classics-related stuff. this is my nerd blog :)

3. letter colour: ...black? tbh i don’t even know what this means

4. url: i just love a god-awful pun, you know? 

5. header: a picture of pompey’s statue! i think i might change it though...

6. blog title: one of my favourite lines from sappho’s poetry (translated by anne carson bc she is god). scrap that, i love all of sappho’s work, but this line has always stood out to me. i thought it fit well, idk

i’m tagging: @ciceros-ghost @ronance-dingus @zombiecap @theancientgeekoroman @aristos---achaion @thetwelvecaesars @awholelotofbooks

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is she… yknow… *makes motion of playing the lyre, eating grapes, and writing poetry*

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The Ides of March by Sir Edward John Poynter

1883

oil on canvas

Manchester City Galleries

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happy ides of march, aka the reason i have trust issues