junkyard-wonder

[junkyard-wonder]

“Of course autistic people can go to the bathroom by themselves and have jobs!!” Some can’t. They’re not burdens or an “epidemic” either. Please don’t get pulled into an argument about usefulness, because that feeds into their baseline eugenic idea that you have to “contribute to society” to justify your existence. Nobody’s worth is tied to what they can do for the state.

[junkyard-wonder]

I need non autistic people to realise meltdowns are a real debilitating thing that has a serious effect on your mental and physical health NOWWWWW!!! The way its been trivialized and lessened pisses me the fuck off. It's not a tantrum and it doesn't come from "being too weak-willed" it's painful and it's embarrassing AND MOST OF ALL IT'S INVOLUNTARY!! Don't claim to be an ally to autistic or disabled people and then make fun of people who have meltdowns. Literally get the hell out of my sight

[junkyard-wonder]

Forever coming to terms with the fact that my brain injury gets worse over time. The fact that I will cognitively backslide. The fact that I am not crazy and I really do struggle so much harder now than I did as a teen. The fact that my cognitive abilities are getting worse and there is no cure. Struggling today

[junkyard-wonder]

people talk about "well some people NEED ABA to learn to mask or decrease supports needs" but never talk about how a) being higher supports not a bad thing b) ABA itself actually increases supports needs for a lot of people who get traumatized from it. ABA doesnt always produce successfully high-masking low-supports "high-functioning" autistics & acting like thats true buys into the idea that ABA actually works and is a reasonable approach to autism

i went into ABA a MSN autistic and came out of ABA a severely traumatized MSN autistic with long-term physical damage and emotional trauma. until emdr therapy i had nightmares flashbacks panic attacks etc every day. a lot of day to day things were triggers and still to this day i struggle and dont think ill ever really be fully healed from what happened to me in ABA. ABA was actively disabling for me, not making my disability "better"

[junkyard-wonder]

I feel like we've gotten to the point of throwing out "it's a spectrum", that many people no longer know what is actually on that spectrum.

I'm genuinely seeing people say things like we don't need to meet the social communication impairments of the criteria. That "it's a spectrum" and "some autistics are highly social and don't struggle with that kind of thing" (not even including masking).

Autism is not that wide of a spectrum that it includes people who don't even meet the core criteria. The autism spectrum is for those within the criteria.

The "spectrum" literally just means that people will have different kinds of symptoms from eachother but within the criteria requirements of symptoms for autism.

[junkyard-wonder]

"The gap between high-functioning and low-functioning Autistic people is too wide. This is why they need to be two separate diagnoses."

There is no gap, there are people there.

There is no gap, there are people there.

There is no gap, there are people there.

There is no gap, there are people there.

There is no gap, there are people there.

There is no gap, there are people there.

There is no gap, there are people there.

There is no gap, there are people there.

There is no gap, there are people there.

THERE IS NO GAP, THERE ARE PEOPLE THERE!

MSN Autistic people exist. Separating the spectrum is to leave us behind. Stop forgetting about us.

[junkyard-wonder]

why does autistic infantilization suck so bad lmao. like yeah i'm very much not a fully capable independent adult but the moment anyone ever acknowledges this i'm killing them.

[junkyard-wonder]

So I got bored and made a server for people with brain damage. Idk how this is going to go with how Tumblr behaves towards brain damage and anything we try to have for ourselves, but it's worth a shot right? It's about time we had some form of unified community.

This server is specifically for people with physical brain damage.

Brain injuries of any kind and cause are welcome! TBIs and ABIs (neurodegenerative diseases if you want to classify yours that way, infection, stroke, drug overdose, birth complications, all are welcome!) of any severity belong here equally. This is intended to be a safe and welcoming space to connect with each other, share experiences and advice, and feel a little less alone with our disability.

No, depression, PTSD, ADHD, etc. are not brain damage. Not everything that affects your brain is brain damage. There are plenty of specific and nonspecific spaces for all manner of neurodivergencies, we deserve a space of our own. If you don't have physical brain damage, this particular space isn't for you and that's okay. I will not tolerate arguments about this, neither on Tumblr nor on the server.

🏳️‍⚧️This server is trans inclusive, terfs and other transphobes are not welcome.

🇵🇸This server is anti-genocide and supports a Palestine free from war and violent occupation.

[junkyard-wonder]

existing on the internet being intellectually disabled is so annoying

people saying youre fake because youre on the internet

people believing you but then being angry when you have symptoms of being intellectually disabled (like how i act when im angry)

people telling you if you can use person first or identity first (i dont care about words i want people to stop treating me like an animal)

people saying theyre ‘trans intellectually disabled’

people saying the r slur

autistic people saying they can reclaim the r slur

people you follow and like suddenly being really ableist towards people like you

people excluding you or saying people are stupid then saying ‘oh i didnt mean intellectually disabled people’ because we’re not default people to them that exist. people dont even think about us

people using the word intellectual all the time when they dont need you to it excludes you from things because youre not ‘an intellectual’

people saying theyre questioning a severe genetic disorder that always causes severe or profound intellectual disability and would be obvious they had

people acting like genetic and chromosomal intellectual disability is a different ‘type’ of intellectual disability to other causes and trying to seperate you

people using long complicated words and long complicated paragraphs then saying oh just get your carer to read it to you when the multiple people that support me including my carers dont always have time to do that and sometimes they dont know how because they dont understand whats being said! and im not patient enough!

people making every single post you make about autism especially low support needs and level 1 autism

people saying (other disability) is intellectual disability or that intellectual disability is a category and not listening when you say its not

people not listening when you explain that in the UK learning disability is one disability and dyslexia dyscalculia etc are ‘learning difficulties’

people getting mad at ME for saying theyre learning difficulties when im not in charge of what disabilities are called! no one has ever asked me to pick the name of a disability!

people arguing over if we can be called smart or if we should be called stupid but in a ‘good’ way

people not understanding that complex topics really are too complex and not all of us can just learn things or have them made accessible to us

people not understanding that some of us might never understand certain concepts no matter how its broken down or explained

people continuously trying to explain things to you after you communicate that it cannot be explained in a way that helps you understand - and then stressing you out because they wont stop!

people getting mad at you because you dont have skills they have (this includes some ID people who have done this to me)

people not understanding that my brain does not register context and every single interaction is isolated to me and based on what direct words are being said

people acting like their concussion or mild TBI or whatever else is the same as intellectual disability, then getting mad at you for your intellectual disability

‘well i work with intellectually disabled children and…’

and the worst worst worst one, people not shutting the fuck up sometimes! sometimes you just need to shut the fuck up!

i could keep listing things for days

people are horrible to me, then surprised i cant cope, then horrible to me for not being able to cope, all while they say im not ID, and then when my family steps in to help theyre surprised i need it. it doesnt make any sense at all

I AM INTELLECTUALLY DISABLED. DO NOT REBLOG THIS POST WITH BIG AMOUNTS OF COMPLEX TEXT. THIS POST IS INTENDED TO BE ACCESSIBLE. MAKE YOUR REBLOGS EASY TO READ. DO NOT MAKE MY OWN POST INACCESSIBLE TO ME.

[junkyard-wonder]

Constantly reminded that even a lot of disabled people don't trust people with brain damage to think for ourselves and hold opinions, let alone abled people. Constantly reminded that even the most otherwise progressive people often think that it would be better if I had died and will happily tell me that. Constantly reminded that being visible both online and offline as someone with noticeable brain damage is a sure way to get myself dehumanised or worse. Well fuck you I'm doing it anyway

(This is about physical brain damage, including ABIs. No your autism/ADHD/PTSD/depression/etc. is not brain damage. Non-brain damaged people can reblog but don't add anything.)

[junkyard-wonder]

existing on the internet being intellectually disabled is so annoying

people saying youre fake because youre on the internet

people believing you but then being angry when you have symptoms of being intellectually disabled (like how i act when im angry)

people telling you if you can use person first or identity first (i dont care about words i want people to stop treating me like an animal)

people saying theyre ‘trans intellectually disabled’

people saying the r slur

autistic people saying they can reclaim the r slur

people you follow and like suddenly being really ableist towards people like you

people excluding you or saying people are stupid then saying ‘oh i didnt mean intellectually disabled people’ because we’re not default people to them that exist. people dont even think about us

people using the word intellectual all the time when they dont need you to it excludes you from things because youre not ‘an intellectual’

people saying theyre questioning a severe genetic disorder that always causes severe or profound intellectual disability and would be obvious they had

people acting like genetic and chromosomal intellectual disability is a different ‘type’ of intellectual disability to other causes and trying to seperate you

people using long complicated words and long complicated paragraphs then saying oh just get your carer to read it to you when the multiple people that support me including my carers dont always have time to do that and sometimes they dont know how because they dont understand whats being said! and im not patient enough!

people making every single post you make about autism especially low support needs and level 1 autism

people saying (other disability) is intellectual disability or that intellectual disability is a category and not listening when you say its not

people not listening when you explain that in the UK learning disability is one disability and dyslexia dyscalculia etc are ‘learning difficulties’

people getting mad at ME for saying theyre learning difficulties when im not in charge of what disabilities are called! no one has ever asked me to pick the name of a disability!

people arguing over if we can be called smart or if we should be called stupid but in a ‘good’ way

people not understanding that complex topics really are too complex and not all of us can just learn things or have them made accessible to us

people not understanding that some of us might never understand certain concepts no matter how its broken down or explained

people continuously trying to explain things to you after you communicate that it cannot be explained in a way that helps you understand - and then stressing you out because they wont stop!

people getting mad at you because you dont have skills they have (this includes some ID people who have done this to me)

people not understanding that my brain does not register context and every single interaction is isolated to me and based on what direct words are being said

people acting like their concussion or mild TBI or whatever else is the same as intellectual disability, then getting mad at you for your intellectual disability

‘well i work with intellectually disabled children and…’

and the worst worst worst one, people not shutting the fuck up sometimes! sometimes you just need to shut the fuck up!

i could keep listing things for days

people are horrible to me, then surprised i cant cope, then horrible to me for not being able to cope, all while they say im not ID, and then when my family steps in to help theyre surprised i need it. it doesnt make any sense at all

I AM INTELLECTUALLY DISABLED. DO NOT REBLOG THIS POST WITH BIG AMOUNTS OF COMPLEX TEXT. THIS POST IS INTENDED TO BE ACCESSIBLE. MAKE YOUR REBLOGS EASY TO READ. DO NOT MAKE MY OWN POST INACCESSIBLE TO ME.

[junkyard-wonder]

You're not fucking cripple punk if you are are gonna be ableist towards severely disabled people. Take those stickers off your cane if you can’t treat powerchair users with speech issues and carers like we’re fucking human beings.

In fact in general if you’re going to treat severely disabled people and people with intellectual disabilities or higher support needs like shit then stay the fuck away from disability "activism" or "advocacy".

[junkyard-wonder]

if your response to "diagnosed autistics in the US are having HIPPA violated to have their names put on a list by the government" is "so happy i was never diagnosed!"... then you are actually not helping in the slightest.

most of us with diagnoses were diagnosed as children, we didn't get a choice. and now we are getting put on a list, with those who are high support needs facing the most danger from said lists.

rubbing it in our faces that you won't be on said list is hurtful. its not funny. its not cute.

[junkyard-wonder]

it’s “listen to autistics” until its lvl 2 or lvl 3 autistics speaking

it’s “listen to autistics” until its msn or hsn autistics speaking

it’s “listen to autistics” until its semiverbal or nonverbal autistics speaking

it’s “listen to autistics” until its autistic people of colour speaking

[junkyard-wonder]

Look, I'm not a political blog at all. But what RFK Jr is trying to do goes to show how much we've thrown high support needs autistics under the bus.

Because he's not talking about the autistics posting online about how they work and pay taxes.

He's talking about the non-speaking ones who have been posting on this app for years that they're in danger and LSN autistics bullied into either leaving or until only a few remain who still face backlash.

He's talking about the ones we aren't on here screaming into a void because they can't write or speak. And LSN autistics rallied louder until autism awareness came to look like we're all just LSN.

He's talking about the ones with carers who want them to be put through experiments to see if they can be cured because autistics bullied carers into their own part of the internet until they were stuck in an echo room of hate.

No, not all autistics. But it's what we've become known for.

It's about time we fucking stopped trying to say "But I can work!" And instead ask "why do those who can't matter less to these people?"

And don't think that if you're not in America this won't affect us. This ideology is everywhere and they're frothing at the mouth to join.

[junkyard-wonder]

“autistic people’s interests not ‘restrictive’ that be pathologizing language!!!” n then cue example of low support needs level 1 autistic with PhD n it’s like

so right now be in extreme fixation stage of something that stick around long enough be call special interest

extreme enough that it overrode my main special interest for 4+ years. just like that.

here what “extreme” mean:

am active do that special interest moment am wake to moment go sleep. constant. as non stop as possible.

sleep about 2-4 hours a day, n sleep at all because human body need sleep. this be 3rd or 4th night in row where do not go sleep until 6am, 8am, wake up at 10 AM, 12PM. AM NOT TIRED. just want do Thing (ppl who know me irl follow this account so shouldn’t admit this or else get concerned spam but brain even too occupy abt that right now. shh.)

btw this lack of sleep probably reason trigger my GI issues. n it really bad. it look like dysmotility, stomach, intestine, maybe, who tf knows. eat 2 bites for “breakfast” before feel like too full will throw up from be stuffed, but even by dinner time maybe stomach growling but not hungry n can’t eat more than another 2 bite. which then cause severe constipation. etc etc etc whatever. know my lack of sleep definitely contribute to it n idk if go catch up w sleep will fix it or if that be trigger worsen episode that gonna stay for while. even with these consequences, no, can’t go sleep. Can’t.

also my eyes blurry from constant use (bc need for do Thing) n lack sleep. will am be able go sleep? no.

basic activities of daily living (ones that can do) too boring to do. spend time eating chewing, that be time away from Thing. minute or two of go bathroom take too much time away from Thing n am almost rushing back so can do Thing. push off get help shower because that take precious time away from Thing. n upset about interruptions. can’t handle interruptions. can’t handle anything be pull out from my lil world of Thing. do those bADLs not pull me out my internal world of Thing. zero attention elsewhere. most ppl even level 1 & maybe even some of 2 autistics not understand what mean by “too bored by bADL to do them” n they think it just spoiled not want do it but no

this be busiest time of semester (online school). have 3 finals this week n already behind (haven’t studied for 2). it not matter. nothing got done. try listen to audio n 20 minutes later realize been zone out somehow thinking abt Thing again. try open up something link really just few clicks n spend 30 minutes because “oh website loading let me just go look at Thing real quick” n 30 minutes pass bc cant stop. my brain occupied. any information need memorize for school for other things simply not fit no space bc whole entire mode on Thing.

write this post fucking painful bc just NEED get back to think about this thing bc write this post be interruption n in fleeing moments (minutes) of can think about other things been thinking abt write this post. if post sound extra confusing or frantic that because am frantic get back. again reminder this blog (disability) be part of MAIN SPECIAL INTEREST FOR FOUR PLUS YEARS it just get kicked off like that. use to check tumblr multiple times day n now go DAYS without check tumblr. n coincidentally this be time be one of post escape containment so get constant notif one point to 2k before cleared it. now again probably another 2k

hope this post fucking make sense bc brain too occupy to think abt write anything that unrelate

haha fuck! me!

okay to reblog this incoherent post in fact please do bc autistic interest can be EXTREMELY restrictive. it can be this level of restrictive AND MORE. can make you genuinely not able do ADLs n cause health issues from things you not doing n you suffer from it but it not change anything

[junkyard-wonder]

Hey, here’s a concept. What if we stopped saying “but autistic people CAN do all those things” (erasing high support needs) and instead started saying “not being able to do those things doesn’t impact someone’s value as a person nor does it make it okay to commit eugenics”.