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★ My Big Fat Shinobi Wedding

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tell me your honest opinion of my portrayal

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nara shikamaru ( 1/? )                     ↪ naruto ch. 321: a way with words!!

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War is not heroic. War is not exhilarating. War is full of despair. It’s dark. It’s dreadful. It’s a thing of sorrow and gloom.

Kira Izuru (Bleach)

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keeneyed.

          IT’S A QUESTION that is often asked of him, for while no one was surprised when the title was passed to kakashi, everyone was. ample years had been spent hindered by self-doubt, enough so to prevent him from even considering the idea. kakashi saw no sense in trying to mask his true feelings on the subject, yet somehow he hoped sharing them with someone like shikamaru would wield different results.

                    ❝          … WELL, THE truth is, i never wanted to in the first place. at the time, it just seemed like the right thing to do.          ❞

and isn’t that a noble reason? it’s made less remarkable by how commonplace a motivation it’s become ( not all of them WANTED to be warriors ), but it’s noble nonetheless. self-sacrifice in a lesser sense is still worth something, when it involves swearing oneself to an unwanted profession ( and such a LOFTY title ).

          ‘ huh. you know, you might be the first kage ever who didn’t want the gig. ’

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– DIDN’T YOU KNOW?  a thousand coppers can outweigh a gold ind. darui from naruto | credit

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tell me your honest opinion of my portrayal

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tbh i should get a drabble tag both of the last ask responses i did were long af

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ilu david wow what a good so smart and funny and brings the Realest shit to the table always 10/10

send your opinion of me on anon.

LUV U ZANA

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I am alive. I am here. I am trying. That is enough.

Unknown  (via atrxmentum)

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cracks knuckles okay but you are one of the raddest people ever?? you're so intelligent and so cool and i look up to you a whole lot (even though you're shorter than me) tbh?? you were one of the very first people i followed when i started rping nar and i wouldn't change that for the world, you're cool as heck, and i'm glad for all the times we've gotten to interact ooc!! <3

send your opinion of me on anon.

i can forgive you for calling me short ( i am short rip i gotta accept this burden ) but thank u so much... we’ve been mutuals on our personals for ages now and i’m honestly shocked that we’ve only just really now started talking? we gotta interact ic too ok hmu sometime i’ll write u something

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totally anon: gOS H OK i'm super pleased to have the chance to talk to you ooc!! i really appreciate your enthusiasm for the things you love, its p contagious in the good way, ya feel? you've always been really kind to me and i thank you for that ♥ not to mention your shikamaru is also really great!!!

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ravi you are such a sweetheart omg.... i’ve been following your blogs for ages bc i Love your writing and i’m so glad to have gotten the chance to get to know you ooc ( even if i’ve been super fuckin spotty on skype lately i’m sorry ) !! i’m real happy that you like my stuff, thank u so much !!

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send ur opinion of me on anon

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Even though it was a little late, Mirai wanted to give her favorite sensei something. Giving him a cute grin, baby Mirai held up a daisy to Shikamaru. "Happy Valentine's Day, Shika-nii!"

he takes the single flower with a smile, tucking the gift into one of the pockets on his vest meant to hold tools and scrolls. it’ll fall out soon, probably, but for now it’s the best badge of honor he could want.

          ‘ thanks, mirai. happy valentine’s day to you too. ’

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♠

unspoken meme.what my muse wants to hear yours say.

he still visits the grave. he doesn’t know why he bothers ( lingering attachment, lingering guilt; it’s anyone’s guess which is stronger ), after all these years between him and the body beneath the ground. there’s nothing he can get out of this that he hasn’t already, nothing more than silence and a creeping sense of regret. 

he lights a cigarette. he’s still using asuma’s brand, asuma’s lighter, asuma’s rasping cough and asuma’s future lung cancer. 

is that how his teacher would have died, if fate had been kinder ? 

          ‘ i kind of envy you sometimes, ’ he says, smoke curling off his lips as he speaks to a mossy grave. ‘ it’s peaceful down there, i bet. no paperwork to do, no politics to worry about, just you and the worms. ’ 

something in his throat catches. he’s not surprised. it’s always like this, when he comes to visit his teacher’s grave; he thinks he’s over it, he thinks the wounds have closed, but his heart never stops hurting and his fucking GRIEF never, never goes away. 

his eyes sting, but he’s not crying yet.

          ‘ i miss you, ’ he says, his voice hoarse from remorse and cigarettes. ‘ i still expect you to come by and ask me to play shōgi with you sometimes. it’s been years now, and i still can’t move on. i thought i did, once, but that didn’t work out. ’ 

he rubs his eyes, and takes another drag. 

          ‘ if you’re listening, tell me you’re proud. i’m still afraid of letting you down. ’

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☾

unspoken meme.a conversation my muse wants to have with yours.

there’s always so much that he wants to say, so many things that don’t make it past the tip of his tongue. with a blue sky above you and grass at your back, it seems like you have all the time in the world. 

it’s peaceful out here. that’s why they like it, right? from the top of this distant hill, just outside konoha’s borders, the village seems small, and politics become nonexistent. forgot diplomacy. up here, he’s not representing anyone but himself. neither is darui, and maybe that’s why they keep coming back. you talk better when you don’t feel the need to watch your words ( being raised on warfare makes it hard to forget ), and friendships built on diplomatic stiffness never do seem to flourish. 

they’re friends, he thinks ( hopes, even ). in darui he’s found a kind of easy comfort that he’d thought had died in the war, a mutual interest in leaving responsibility behind for a while ( but not too long ) and an uncommon trust that comes with. it’s nice. it’s something to look forward to, when the days get long and life becomes a monotony of paperwork and international tensions. they don’t see each other often ( for once, he wishes that he’d been born to a different village ), but it’s worth it when they can.  

he doesn’t want to ruin this.  

so he swallows his half-formed words, keeps his thoughts to himself, and looks up at the sky like the clouds might have answers. there’s no manual for this kind of thing, no telling what might happen if he said what’s on his mind, and he’d rather have his feelings go unrequited that spoil a friendship he’s come to value so much. 

the clouds above are calm and beautiful. 

shikamaru bites back a clichéd confession, and tries to follow suit. 

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alright i’ve got some asks to do that i’ll get to after watching an episode of kitchen nightmares w my squad !! im me or shoot me an ask if u wanna plot in the meantime