kaileynel4-blog

[kaileynel4-blog]

Shanti Shanti Shanti

Well my time in India is quickly coming to an end and I can’t help but reflect! This country is truly eye opening and surprised me in so many ways. I would like to say, that if you have the chance to visit India, do it!

My first few days were spent in Delhi and lucky for me I actually know a wonderful human who lives in Delhi, so I was able to crash with her for a couple days. This was the perfect way to ease into the craziness of India. All the photos, stories and crazy shit you hear about India is pretty much accurate. The traffic and driving is insane...I thought I had been prepared for it while being in Thailand but India is on a whole other level! The diverse flavors and endless supply of masala tea will keep you fat and happy. The markets are filled with soooo many beautiful sari’s and scarfs...I was in scarf heaven!! Sensory overload for the taste buds cause the food in India is BOMB.COM!! I love Indian food and think that it is surpassing my love for Thai food! Here’s a couple photos of India!

Now, it can’t all be rainbows and sunshine when traveling. I wish it was but there are ups and downs. So far on my travels, it has been pretty easy to naivatge and travel as a solo female. I take pride in the fact that I have survived this far with minimal scrapes and bruises. But India is a whole other ball game when it comes to solo traveling and being a female. Now, I am not saying anything negative towards the culture and fully understand that I am a guest in your country and respect all aspects of the diverse culture but here are a few things I have observed and learned so far. When walking around you can’t smile at everyone cause then they won’t leave you alone and potentially follow you. Unfortunately, as a female, you have to be on guard more and when in India just a little bit more than I have been used to. This was an adjustment. I have been followed, cat called, and not let walk down the road without hackling me to come into their shop, even when I politely say “no thank you”. These may seem like minimal things and can happen to you whereever you go but it just seemed a little more intense here. The navigation of this country is not like Thailand. Thailand and Cambodia are a breeze in comparison to figuring out the transportation here. Usually when backpacking you can ask the front desk at your hostel to arrange your transportation to the next destination. India is not so...well at least the places I went to. This is a true traveling experience for me. Figuring out that going to the train station and buying your ticket is not easy and that they may accidentally give you the wrong ticket or that the bus driver really doesnt like it when you bring a beer onto a 12 hour bus journey....I mean, most countries probably don’t like that haha the lesson I have learned overal is acceptance. This is the phone home message that I want to get across. I have ran into slightly scary situations, been angry that people won’t stop asking me to buy things from their shop or that they are obviously ripping me off cause I am a foreigner. But accepting the situation and choosing to process it in a positive manner is what I have learned. Holding grudges or continuing to be angry at a situation is not going to get you anywhere...maybe just a little bit more bitter and a little bit more of shoving that stick up your ass. So here’s my challenge to you, focus on acceptance. Bring balance to your life and try to just accept the situation. You don’t know where the person is coming from, their back ground, how long they may have been away from their families just trying to make ends meet, or that shit just happens and you have to roll with it. Here is a lovely store owner that read my aura in Udaipur and a super nice college student that helped me navigate the train system. She also drew me a beautiful mandala bookmark! I have met many amazing people in India that just want to sit down over a cup of chai tea and chat about life. This is my favorite part about India and one that I will hold dearly to my heart.

Yoga...I have been living and breathing all things yoga (and a little bit of beach life) the past month. Learning about the different positions, anatomy and philosophy of yoga. It has truly been a month that I will never forget. Yoga is not just about flexiblity, that is actually the smallest aspect to yoga. The culture behind it is diverse, accepting, inspiring and deep as shit. If anyone is ever interested in yoga but feels intimidated by it cause they aren’t flexible, do not worry about that. The beautiful thing about yoga is that it’s about you. Its your journey to find that inner balance in life and truly figure out how you can clear your mind. This has been the hardest thing for me. Meditation is no joke and I suck at it. Like truly can’t do it. This is all part of yoga too. It is something that I have to work on and accept that over time it will come. Now without getting to yoga intense on you, here’s the last positive point I want to make...find your balance. I am all about balance and it’s true in my nature to seek it. So if you are stressed in life, figure out why and find the balance of managing it that works for you. If you are depressed or continually sad, find the thing that will balance you out and bring you up. My balance is yoga and it has helped me calm down when things get to be too much and it’s also the thing that can level me up and bring energy to my day. So sit back and reflect upon yourself...think about how you are feeling and what type of changes or tweaks you want to make to find that balance in your life to be truly your best self and then of course do it!

Now on a slightly lighter note, I would like to say, I love you, to my parents. Thank you for continuing to support me, store all my shit even though you hate doing it and please continue to struggle at using the video chat. It is hilarious and I love that I stare up your noses every time we chat.

Share some extra love to those in your life today and be thankful to have them!

Cheers and see you Oregonians in 2 months!

Oh and look up what shanti shanti shanti means :)

[kaileynel4-blog]

Chapter 3: Solo Travel

So chapter two of my journey has come to an end. When I started four months ago on my new Siem Reap journey, I had no idea what to expect. I just jumped in with both feet. I immediately met some amazing people. The ones that you know will be your friends for life. I Had many many nights out on pub street dancing the night away, many many $1.50 margs at Viva, cheap beers after work, volunteering with Paw Patrol, eating delicious food, doing a couple touristy things and simply enjoying living in Cambodia. But if there is one thing that I can take away from this experience it is to jump in with both feet. A quote from a good friend I met in Siem Reap. She moved a lot as a kid for her dads job and he would always tell her when they moved to a new place, “jump in with both feet”. A simple message but one that we all should try to remember when change is nocking at our door. It is good to keep those memories in your heart, the people you met and the experiences you had, but move forward with your full heart. Be open to what may come and be excited for it. So I am putting both feet forward and ready to see what is in my future. I am ready to frolick the islands of Thailand with Kara, I am ready to travel solo in India, I am ready to tackle this month long yoga teacher training course in India, I am ready to explore around the beautiful Sri Lanka, I am ready to volunteer and follow my passions, I am ready to meet Sarah (and possibly Nat and Beth) in the Philippines and I am ready for all the unexpected things that fall in between. So when change comes banging at your door...open it, say hello with a big smile and jump in with both feet forward! I have a few photos from my Cambodia life to share! :)

There are so many life sayings that you hear that resignate with you. Recently, I heard yet another amazing saying about life that I will remember...”hurry slowly”. Now, let that sink in for a minute....really think about what that means to you....

We all want to get somewhere and are eager for the next steps in life. Excited to see what is to come, how we will reach our goals, how we wil be successful and the experiences we will have. But as we hurry to the next thing, remember to let it happen the way it is supposed to. Some things are out of our control and at the end of the day there are just some things that we cant control or even predict. One of the craziest things for me is when I moved to Cambodia. When I left Oregon a year ago (almost to the day now), I assumed I would stay in Thailand and then travel to Vietnam and Bali afterwards. I had no idea that I would have moved to Siem Reap and now instead of traveling to those original destinations I am going to India, Sri Lanka and the Philippines. Finding the balance of controlling your future and also just letting it take its natural course, is one that I have had to learn. Learn to have faith in the process. There have been many many moments where I cried and thought what the F*** am i doing abroad when all my friends and family are back home? Or, how am I going to make money when I get home? (Still figuring that one out) But one thing that I keep on falling back on is that it will all work out the way it is supposed to in the end. I can do my best to be present in my experiences, learn from the many cultures I have experienced, eat all the delicious food, meet and learn about peoples stories, and in the end simply invest in myself. Now, that leads into my last point :) Investing in yourself. I am taking the next 5 months to invest in myself. Really do things that I want to do and learn from. When I travel to India, the main thing that I am excited for is doing it on my own. Navigating through the bustlin city of Delhi, seeing the Taj Mahal and sleeping under the stars in the desert. A year ago, I would have never expected to be confident enough and ready to take on India by myself. The experiences that you have and the choices you make, set you up for the future and help you conquer situations that you couldn’t have imagined years before. So I challenge you to invest in yourself, trust in the process and hurry slowly. If you are unhappy with an aspect in your life, change it, improve it or simply get rid of it and start over. Life is a beautiful thing and I want everyone who reads this silly little blog to feel inspired, motivated and excited to be living their lives! Just a beautiful photo of the lotus fields at sunset to remind you how amazing and beautiful life is!-photo taken by Nat...my skills aren’t that good :)

And lastly, happy birthday to Meggers, Katrina Colleen Bailey(Hubler) and my nephew Camden. Love you and hope you birthdays were amazing. Meggers happy early birthday :)

[kaileynel4-blog]

Always in the stars

I’m a dreamer. I always day dream and stare off...my dad use to call it my “space face”. I will admit, sometimes i am literally thinking about nothing, just blank brain. When i am not suffering from blank brain, I am usually day dreaming. I’m up in space, searching for the next exciting thing and finding things I am passionate about. Lately, I have found myself dreaming more than I would like to. I feel that there are pivotal moments in our lives where we know change is coming and we are ready for it but dont know when it will come. The anticipation is killer and I have always been an impatient person (runs in the family). The thing that you need to remember when this moment happens and lets hope it happens more than once, is to appreciate the in between. This is the part where you know that you are ready and excited for the next chapter. The in between is a period to understand what you really want to do. Take what you have learned and move forward with it. Growth is an amazing thing that people go through. Most of the time we dont even realize that we are growing. We grow at a steady pace, just like trees. So embrace this moment and seize the day!

I have always had a soft spot for the elderly. I love to hear their stories, chat about life over decaf coffee, and learn to bake the best cobbler. Side note: mom and dad, can you tell grandma i miss her since she doesn’t understand technology and will never see this. Anywho, My grandfather was a marine vet and one of the best men i will ever meet. I used to have lunch with him when he was in a nursing home. He was a simple man - quiet, witty, kind and stubborn. During these lunches with him, i was able to hear other peoples stories (like i said, my grandpa was a quiet man). They told me about their families, what their life was like together and how they became who they are today. As I think back on these moments, I hope that I too, can tell the glorious stories of my life to a day dreaming youngster. I want to be proud of my life, have memories that are unique to me, and to meet people from all over the world. So start day dreaming. Have crazy dreamer thoughts that you doubt will come true but can still hope. Put it out there. Let your flag wave cause you dont know who will see it!

There is this weird thing in Siem Reap where all the expats that live here are kind of judgemental of eachother. I am slowly starting to see it and understand this weird phenomenon. Siem Reap is a very unique little tourist town. The main things to do here are start up your own NGO, drink lots of alcohol or try all the delicious restaurants. The NGO part is what i am gonna focus on cause everyone eats and drinks where ever they live. So, I am all for people making a difference in the world, trying to help those that are less fortunate and people bringing awareness to global issues. The part that I have an issue with is the judgement you get from those people if you aren’t part of their NGO community. (Again, i am fully supportive of people helping make the world a better place, not trying to rag completely on NGO’s). There is no person granting you special powers if you are better than the person next to you. I think this is a reflection of what is happening in our current society. People need to stop comparing and judging those around us. Everyone is trying to be their best self and be a good person (unless you are a phycopath) so there is no need to compare your level of goodness to others. It is shocking to me that people are competitive when it comes to trying to make the world a better place. I love to encourage people to use a reusable bottle or say no to a plastic bag but am i going to be mad at you for using a plastic cup, No. I just hope to educate people about it. I could go on a very long rant but i will spare you, i just hope that whatever you are doing to make the world a better place, you do it judgemental free and whole heartedly. The world needs more people like you!

Here is an awesome photo of my Cambodian family! Love these people and so happy to have met them all :)

Christmas is literally right around the corner...like days away. Being away from home during the holidays is waaaay harder than I thought. So to my family, I love you, miss you and give you all big hugs. To my friends back home, another round of big hugs and a cheers to our friendship!

I wish everyone happy holidays and a big cheers to the new year! May it be filled with laughter, adventure and growth!

Sending love and laughter back home :)

[kaileynel4-blog]

So many things to be thankful for!

I am now all settled in my new apartment in Cambodia. Got my photos hung up, tapestry on the wall(keeps falling) and the house plants have made their debut. The craziest thing about the place is the outdoor kitchen! I would have never guessed when i left America, that I would be in Siem Reap living in a tiny studio apartment where my kitchen sits over a lotus flower pond thing. The other bonus is that there are cows that roam around the streets. Just the other morning i stepped outside to bike to work and a cow was right infront of my door doing cow things. He didn’t move and of course made me go around him! Having wide open spaces is something that has become increasingly important to me or at least being able to have access to them. So Mom and Dad, I want to thank you. Thank you for moving out in the country and having us grow up playing in the woods, using our imaginations, showing us to appreciate nature and dealing with us complaining that we are too far from our friends who lived in the city (except for KC). I dont think i will live as far as we did but definitely will want to live in a place that has nature easily accessible. So thank you for that! The appeal of this tiny apartment was the simple fact of nature and also, when in my life would i be able to live above a lotus flower pond!!! I mean really? One thing that I have learned already is to challenge myself to get out of my comfort zone. I mean this whole trip was about that but even this apartment is part of that. Adapting to the weird things that come with living near a pond...just yesterday I had 7 frogs hopping around my place. One now is a proper resident of my bathroom. I was trying to put them outside but the doors arent properly sealed so the little buggers kept sneaking in. It was a battle that I lost and just hoped that I wouldn’t wake up with one on my face. I did look up if there are any deadly frogs in Cambodia and couldn’t find anything so at least i wont die from them. There are also spiders and other creatures that roam around the kitchen. The thing i have taken from my new crib is that when in a foreign country, try not to live like a foreigner, live like the locals. Take in the differences, learn about the culture and do as they do!

Here’s a couple photos of the place!

We all go through ups and downs in life. That’s just how it goes. We adapt, learn and grow from these experiences. So far, I am learning a lot! Soaking everything up like a sponge and learning from it. So far i have learned, people are crazy drivers and dont care if you are on a bicycle, dont drink the water but you can use it to wash your dishes, always learn hello and thank you when in a new country, passion fruit is the best fruit ever, sweat is a daily occurrence, dont touch Thai peoples heads, Cambodia has the most public holidays in the world, washing your hair is not that necessary, always bring a reusable straw, dont give money to the kids on the street, everyone talks about their horrible poop stories, air conditioning is precious as gold, cold showers are actually wonderful, locals wake up very early, Thais eat spicy and Cambodians do not, all dogs and cats here need to be spayed or neutered, time is not a concern, everyone is late and its okay, food does not come out in a timely manner, if your meal hasn’t come in 20 minutes most likely it was never made and they are doing it now, SE Asia does not know how to make a proper cookie or cake, when it rains ALL the bugs come out, i am allergic to red ant bites, never stay in a party hostel unless you are prepared for what is to come, seek out local culture, Oreo cookies are really good dunked in coconut milk, Asian elephants live a tough life and need more help than i thought, i am fully addicted to coffee, always check your bowls and cups for critters under them, bum guns are gods gift to this earth, the fruit is out of this world delicious, water is life, dont waste anything, there are good people everywhere, check your tennis shoes for frogs, I think I am ready to live out of a VW bus and lastly, mosquitos suck. Life is a crazy journey and I fully intend to continue to soak everything up like a sponge, challenge things and always be kind.

This is my first holiday season away from home. I am lucky enough to have a loving family that cherishes spending the holidays together. So the one thing that I am grateful this thanksgiving is my family. You are all amazing and I wouldn’t be where i am without you all. I spoke with my grandma before she went in for surgery and she said, “how are you talking to me when you are in Cambodia?” I love her so much and love that she doesn’t understand how technology works. So this holiday season i challenge you to be thankful for something everyday not just one day a year. There are people in our lives that impact it for a lifetime and derserve to be given thanks everyday, not just in November.

Cheers to meeting good people in life, being thankful for all that we have and simply being happy!

Love you all and wish you the happiest of holidays this year! :)

[kaileynel4-blog]

It’s never too late to be dope as shit!

So i have moved from the rural elephant village to Siem Reap, Cambodia. The change was quick and now I am waking up to the noises of cars, rather than dogs barking and roosters doing whatever the hell it is they do at 4 in the morning! Most people seem to be surprised that I moved and my response to that is “fuck it”. Yes, that is what I thought when i was offered the job and how I feel about most of my decisions lately. The stress of putting so much pressure on certain decisions is bull shit. Worst case, it doesn’t work out and you learn from it and Move on. That is what I am trying to do lately. Say fuck it (obviously not to things like getting a tattoo on my forehead) and try not to worry about how this decision can impact my whole life...i mean, I know it will but that’s just something i dont wanna think about! So here is where i lead into something thought provoking... i was watching this movie called The Revolutionary Road, starring Leo and his side kick Kate winslet. The main reason i picked it was because they were so great in Titanic, so this must be a good one too. The main thing that I got from the movie was, that Kate’s character was tired of their ordinary, mundane suburban lifestyle, so she proposed an idea to her husband, Leo’s character, that they move to Paris and he can chase after his dreams...whatever those may be. He hated his job and she was bored of being at home taking care of the kids so she wanted to change their happiness. They started down the path of planning it but life got in the way. He got a promotion, she got pregnant and he said that they should stay and become happy there. In the end, she killed her self...aside from the death, I found this movie interesting. Some things may seem daugnting or unattainable but really it’s just ourselves listening to the possibility of failure. Everyone is afraid and that fear turns to doubt and then doubt turns to backing down. This is what happens to many people in their lives. Self doubt. I recon that we have let fear control our lives a little too much. So go slap fear right in the face and give it the middle finger! Take the leap of faith, pull the trigger, be bold and go for it. It wont be easy but you will pass the hard part and this wonderful thing of achievement will happen. Your mood will change, your outlook on life will change and the outlook on yourself will change. Bet on yourself cause guaranteed you are fucking awesome!

Alright, so i went on a little tourist day with my friend Claire and her brother who was visiting. We went to the floating village and it was pretty amazing. These people have created their lives out here on the water. Aside from the amazing views, i was absolutely shocked by the amount of rubbish everywhere! I couldn’t believe how much there was and that no one was making efforts to improve it. The source of the issue is access to it but really its how god damn convenient plastic has made itself. If you go to the super market, just notice how much plastic is there. You will be shocked by it and hopefully will be as disgusted by it as me! So i am on this new kick to try to reuse as much as i can. Sometimes plastic is unavoidable so here is what i have done....i got crafty! I found an old dress and made a reusable bag from it for fruit and veggies when i got to the store! I sewed the bag and then used a plastic bag as the draw string handle. Now, my next goal is to sell these bags and donate the proceeds to an organization helping fix the issue of plastic consumption here in Siem reap. I have not put a patent on these and encourage everyone to find creative ways to minimize their consumption of this shitty thing that is taking over our planet, Iliterally! Here is a photo of the first one and the floating village! Little changes make a huge difference :)

And lastly, to my thai family. I want to thank you for showing me your culture. Letting me be me and accepting it. Showing me parts of your life, allowing me to question things and ultimately having me fall in love with your country. My final day was an emotional one and the traditional thai blessing was something i will never forget. So please tell yay Koh i miss her adorable smile and grandma hugs, give my dogs some extra scratches, and please say hi to the elephants! I miss you very much and hope that you read this blog post since i have made a special shout out to you! Haha You all are amazing people and i will see you again someday.

Cheers to accepting new opportunities!!

[kaileynel4-blog]

Love, love and more love!

Well, I am back in Surin and my 3 week visit home has come and gone. Every time i think about my visit home, i tend to smile. There were so many moments of laughter, love and adventure. I want to give a special thank you to all the people who made an effort to hang out with me. It was absolutely wonderful to see you all and a super special shout out to my family. I am so grateful for you all and extra love to my dad who picked me up at 2 in the morning when i arrived cause i missed my connecting flight. I was exhausted and pissed off and a dad hug was exactly what i needed when i landed in Portland. When I was home, people asked “how does it feel to be home?”. I didn’t really have a good answer for this...the main reason is cause I didn’t exactly know. Of course i was happy to see all the people in my life that I love but I guess i know that my time abroad is not over yet (sorry mom and dad). I moved out here for a reason and feel that I have not fully fulfilled what i set out to do. Another weird thing was seeing all my personal belongings sitting in my dads office in the corner. It was weird to see how much crap i have... again, sorry mom and dad. I have been living off of a small amount of clothing and necessities...to my surprise, i have been getting by just fine. The amount of excess things that us Americans think we need to survive is shocking. That was probably the biggest thing that i noticed most about being home. I am guilty of having lots of things but seeing it everywhere was eye opening. So here’s the food for thought moment in my blog....I challenge you to look around your house and think, do i really need all these things to make me happy? Do i need all these kitchen gadgets that i never use? Do i need 10 different sheets even though i know i only really rotate through 2 or 3 of them? Do i really need all these clothes in my closet? There are so many other things in life that can bring happiness to us that are not materialistic objects. People all over the world go through life with far fewer things and seem to get the whole happiness thing better than us! I am not saying get rid of all your shit but maybe just think about what actually makes you happy! Personally, getting out of the house and adventuring around is what fills my soul with happiness, so what will make you happy that isn’t something you can buy?

There are so many things in life that I tend to love a ridiculous amount. Some make sense and others not so much. For shits and giggles, here is a little list of them...i know you were dying to know what they are!

I love the cute giggle my nephew makes when you tickle him

I love coconut milk lattes

I love sunshine

I love to smell flowers

I love to smell trees

I love dogs

I love hugs from my family

I love sandwiches

I love a good cold glass of beer

I love laughing hysterically at something that you forgot what you were even laughing at

I love hugging people and then lifting them up

I love the ocean and running full sprint into it

I love jamming to music in your car with your hand out the window

I love seeing my parents hold hands while sitting on the couch

I love cheese but my stomach usually does not

I love wearing clothes that absolutely dont match but are really comfy

I love naps

I love VW buses

I love documentaries

I love when my food comes out at restaurants

I love star gazing

I love wool socks and my slippers

I love fuzzy blankets

I love tacos

I love being cozy

I love giving gifts to people

I love making brunch

And i love my niece and nephew so stinkn much!

Once you take a moment to start reflecting on what you love, you find it hard to stop. Something that I have been realizing about life, is that it is okay to show your emotions about things. Let the world know what you love and what you are passionate about. Take moments in your day to reflect on what you love and why. Guaranteeed, if you are in a grumpy mood this will change it around! Anger comes and goes but love lasts forever. Once you find things you love, they stay around forever. I mean, who doesn’t love a good sandwich filled with all the delicious fixings!?! I hope that when i am old and sitting in my rocking chair, about to take my third nap of the day, that i still love all of these things and many many more! Love is what makes us human and at the end of the day, we all are chasing after it.

Alright, i think i have made my hippie love point clear and can move on... lastly, i want to say one last thing to all my Oregonian friends. Fall is coming (or already here) and that means changing leaves, crisp fall air, wool socks, scarfs and beanies are making their way out from the back of the closet and the season for stupid pumpkin spice lattes is upon us. Fall is a beautiful time in the PNW and I challenge you to get out there and see it! Thailand doesn’t have fall colors and its something that I miss, so for me, please go camping, take evening walks to see the trees changing, wear all your layers to stay warm, take amazing hikes through the forest to see all the colors, and simply appreciate how beautiful our state is!

Here is a photo of the Columbia Gorge when i was home. Even with smoke, she still is beautiful!! Also, daisy passed out after our hike :)

So here is a special shout out to my amazing older sister. Happy birthday to you! Thank you for visiting me in Thailand, thank you for letting me steal your dog to go on hikes, thank you for sharing the same passions about life as i do, thank you for having the cutest children, and thank you for being my sister! Also, you are an amazing mother and it is truly inspiring. Love you and wish that i could be drinking rose on your deck celebrating your birthday with you!

Sending a big 22oz cheers to you all back home!

[kaileynel4-blog]

An order of special sauce please!

I am sitting in a coffee shop (per usual) but this time I am not in Surin, I am in the Bangkok airport waiting for my flight to go home! I cant help but think about how quickly 6 months have gone by. It’s a crazy feeling to think about how long 6 months can be but also short at the same time! I have missed my friends and family so much but want them to know that I am doing just fine here. I am getting in the groove of things in Surin and the village, i go on as many adventures as i can and currently have lots of motivation to get the village recycling! Life is good. True words spoken from a human being that i met in Surin. She was a teacher at one of the local schools and was a bundle of laughter and silliness. Every time we would do something fun around the city, she would always say “Life is good!”. Indeed it fucking is! I loved when she said this. It was the simplest way to appreciate where you are in life. Stop and acknowledge that this amazing cup of coffee is delicious or that this beach is absolutely stunning. Whatever the moment is, just remember that LIFE IS GOOD! I would like to give a shout out to Maria. Thank you for being my American friend in Surin, thank you for reminding me how wonderful life is, thank you for going along with my ridiculousness when we biked around Surin (like biking through all of the mud puddles cause its fun) and the biggest thank you for your truly amazing laugh. I wish i had that laugh on video cause it was nothing but pure happiness and extremely contagious! I hope you have been loving life in Egypt and teaching those kids how to live life, cause you are damn good at it!

Here is the first adventure Maria and i went one...aka our first date :)

Now lets talk about this special sauce business...I am not referring to that delicious Aardvark sauce. You may be wondering what the hell i am referring to...well hold on to your horses cause I am getting there. About a year ago i met this wonderful human that continues to support and cheer me on while i am in Thailand. He is truly an inspiring person. Anyways, he asked me this one question that i will never forget...”what is your special sauce?” I had no idea what he was talking about and definiently was going to answer with my favorite hot sauce. He then explained to me what special sauce was and it goes a little something like this...your special sauce is that one thing that you possess that no one else has, that thing that gets you so excited that you cant help but love doing it, that one thing that you can see yourself doing for the rest of your life. Its the thing that you bring to the table that no one else can do as good as you. Pretty much its the thing that pumps you up more than anything! I had no idea how to answer cause i did not know what my sauce was. For about a month, I was very frustrated about this. I felt slightly empty and mad that I couldn’t figure out what my sauce was. I was starting to think that maybe my special sauce is that i didnt have one haha it wasn’t until I hosted the first PDX trash tribe event that i knew what my special sauce was. The feeling of getting people together and making a difference in the world is what I loved doing and being a part of it. I loved the energy that everyone had, i loved that i was part of it and i loved that I was bringing people together to help make a difference in the world. After that day, I knew what my sauce was and now had to figure out how to get it. It wasn’t until a few months later that I reached out to Bamboo and applied to the current position that i now have. I may have not been here if it wasn’t for that one question and Marsh, i wanna thank you for that! I now have the inspiration and passion that I was looking for with my job, I am overwhelmingly happy (my boss always asks me why i am so happy) and I am incredibly grateful to be where I am at. Now, you may be wondering what your special sauce is...it doesn’t always have to be about your career but it could be some characteristic that you have that brings joy to people. Just find what it is and continue to let the world see it. Don’t stress like I did if you cant figure it out right away...good things come with time. Just remember one thing along the way, Life is good.

Alrighty, I cant wait to see all your smiling faces and give everyone big hugs...Erin(aka errrn), I am coming for you and cant wait to give you a big hug where i pick you up! The one person i am most excited to see is my nephew. Camden, even though you cant read, I hope you know that I miss you so much and cant wait for you to give me a big Camden hug. I will try not to have jet leg tomorrow so that we can play with all your toys and build a cool fort! Love you all so much and grateful that I have each and everyone of you in my life! Here is a cute Camden, Avery and grandpa photo...sorry if any of my thai coworkers are reading this...i show them a photo of my niece and nephew all the time that now they get annoyed by it!

Cheers to living life and cheers to my best friend getting married. I cant wait to see how beautiful you will be on your wedding day and so happy i get to be a part of it! Get ready to dance the night away cause i have been saving up for about 6 months!

See you all soon. Much love :)

[kaileynel4-blog]

You are all lucky SOB’s!!!

Alrighty, let’s dive right into the issue of my blog....my title is incorrect!!! Yes, this whole time I have had a title I did not mean to have. I mean, it doesn’t really make sense?!? Happiness is contagious, just like a sneeze??? So remember when I wrote my first blog post? The one where I deleted my entry 3 times?!?! So I think that is where my problem all started! I was so frustrated with the fact that I stupidly deleted my blog, that I stupidly wrote the wrong title!? I am not sure where the sneeze part came into play but I meant to say YAWN!! Yawns are contagious, not SNEEZES! Sweet jesus I’m an oblivious idiot sometimes. I think I am just gonna drop the sneeze part and just go with Happiness is Contagious. Sorry for all the confusion and head scratches along the way...I will say one thing though, it sure would have been nice if one of you told me!!! Just said “hey kailey, your title doesn’t make sense...sneezes aren’t contagious...” I blame 20% of this title mistake on you guys!

Anyways, the past few weeks have been a bit more challenging for me and continually learning the ups and downs of living abroad. I have been in Thailand for 5 months now and can’t believe it! Some days it feels like I’ve been gone forever and others like I just left last week. The amount of thinking through my emotions and listening to that little voice in my head, is much more than I anticipated. I am not much of an emotional person...I am not saying that I am heartless person or that I dont have emotions, I just don’t outwardly express them as much as others. So having to deal with these random thoughts and emotions is not my favorite thing to do. There are many ways to cope with your mental state of craziness. Currently, mine is exercise and coffee. Yes, coffee. I try to do some sort of physical activity everyday. It helps with all my anxiousness that I tend to have...sometimes I swear my attention span is like a 5 year olds. The “squirrel” situation happens to me more often than it should :) Coffee...oh the sweet sweet smell of good coffee. Drinking an iced cappuccino helps calm me and has become a comfort thing for me. It is a reminder of home but also brings back all the wonderful times I have had drinking coffee with my favorite people! I feel a sense of normalcy is brought to my not so normal life. I love the adventure that I am on but realized that it’s okay to want a bit of normalcy and miss some comforts of back home. In the beginning, I wouldn’t let myself think about all the things I missed cause I thought it would be harder but then I realized that I am lucky to miss people from home. I am one lucky lady to be living in a place that not many others have experienced. I am lucky to be surrounded by constant support and love. And I am lucky to have dogs all around me and help improve the lives of elephants in SE Asia! Now this is the part where you get to reflect...what makes you feel lucky?? What are the moments in your life where you have just thought “damn, I am one lucky bastard!” How do you cope with your crazy thoughts and emotions? One thing that i am learning along this journey, is to reflect and be grateful everyday that I am alive. If you are still reading my blogs (thank you Mom) I hope the one thing that you have taken away from them is to be grateful. The crappy situation you may think you are in could always be worse and sometimes you just need to remind yourself how fuckin lucky you are to be alive! Here is a photo of me loving life with two of coworkers, Fang and Roger! We were with the volunteers as they walked the elephants to the river!

This past week I had mixed emotions about life...I was feeling homesick and i think in large part due to the fact that my sister and Jacque were visiting and had just left. Words cant begin to describe how amazing it was to have my sister and Jacque come visit me. It is a pretty special thing to be able to share my Thailand home with the one person that I have always looked up to and admired. Being able to show my sister the loving community i live in, the efforts that Bamboo is doing to improve the lives of the elephants and show her why I love working here. I hope that she now has a better sense of what i am doing and understands a bit more as to why I moved here! After my sister and Jacque left, I had a bit of an emotional rollercoaster for a couple days. I was questioning why the fuck I am here, what do i want to get out of working in Thailand and really how much i missed home. As i worked through these emotions, i realized that I chose to do this. this decision was all me. I reached out to Bamboo to see if they had a job opening, I applied and I got the job. I didn’t care what people thought about me moving aboard cause I knew that I wanted to do it and that was all that mattered. I hope that from here on out I will be bold with my decisions, chase after my dreams, continue to spread happiness (even if its not contagious like a sneeze haha) remember how amazing life is when you are living it up, and always encourage those around you to be the best version of themselves.

The level of shits given lately is 0 for me. I am used to the weird Thailand things and know that i just need to accept it and move on. For example, there is a gecko that lives in my room. He poops in the same spot in my room and I cant seem to get him out! Normally, people would freak out about this and maybe even call a terminator. I dont think there is a such thing in Thailand so I just pray every night that I dont wake up with him on my face. In the village, the water goes out during the middle of the day. I have also had to accept this and just do a bucket shower or remain extremely smelly for a few more hours. I realized when my sister was visiting that my level of actual cleanliness is suffering a bit. I just dont really care that i brush my teeth from water that has been sitting in a bucket for who knows how long, or that the dishes we use to eat with everyday sit outside to dry with all the bugs and critters that could potentially crawl on them, or that i swim in a elephant poo infested river twice a week cause i am not gonna pass up swimming with them. I used to refuse to sleep on floors and never really liked camping in tents unless i had a pad. I have slept on the floor with a small thai pad for 5 months now. Some days i would love to have a tempurpedic mattress but for the most part I have done pretty good considering how high maintenance i was about sleeping on the floor. I have survived brushing my teeth in questionable water for 5 months and as long as I brush them i am pretty pleased with myself. There are just some things in life that aren’t worth the energy of worrying about. Accepting this is the hardest part but something I am learning. Thailand so far has taught me to be tougher and a little smellier. We live a pretty cushy and priviladge life in America and it is good to strip yourself of these privileges every once in awhile to really see what your boundaries are. When Jacque and my sister were here, the one thing that Jacque said she realized almost immediately was that she will never complain about water her beautiful plants again. We saw a woman carrying two big buckets of water on the end of a stick and was going to water her crops. We dont have to worry about watering our plants cause all we have to do is turn the hose on and stand there. We also have house plants for our pure enjoyment and dont rely on them to make a living. Appreciation is a huge thing for me and i appreciate every delicious cup of coffee i get, i appreciate all the meals that are cooked for me, I appreciate when my thai coworkers pick me up so i dont have to walk, I appreciate the dark chocolate that my mom sent me, I appreciate the smell of clean laundry and i appreciate most of all the people in my life. So the next time you complain about having to water your plants, drive your nice car to the grocery store, having to take your dog for a walk, or complain about your bed being too small, remember just how fucking lucky we are to have these things in our lives. Some people wont ever have the luxury of having these things so please just be grateful and appreciative of all that you have!

Here is a photo of our staff/family dinners in the village! I LOVE SPICY THAI FOOD!!!!

Here is one last thing before i go...I have fallen in love.......with a dog at the village. Her name is Kao (pronounced like cow) and she is the sweetest dog. I have talked about her before. She is the dog that had 4 litters of puppies and I paid for her to get spayed so she doesn’t have to have any more puppies! Anyways, I want to adopt kao and bring her back home to America to live a spoiled and privileged puppy life. The problem i have run into is that I dont know exactly when I will be coming home for good and need someone to help foster/adopt her. If you are interested in helping me get her to america please let me know! I am looking for someone to temporarily take care of her until i come home. Now i must warn you, if you want to foster her, please dont fall in love with her. She is my dog and I will want her back! It is going to be hard for you cause she is an amazing pup but we can work out a situation where you can still see her. Maybe even puppy sit! Okay, I’m getting off topic here....If anyone would like to help me out with this amazing and sweet dog please let me know! It is a long process to adopt a dog from Thailand so it would take a little while but i would love to get it started. Here are a couple photos of her to make you feel a little guilty and possible persuade you to help out ;) also, if you cant adopt but want to help out financially let me know!

As always i am sending lots of hugs and kisses to those back home. I am grateful everyday that I am alive and happy and I hope that you are too!

Cheers to summer livin and see you all in a month!! If anyone wants to have a slumber party and drink wine when i am home, i am most definitely down for that!

Love you all :)

[kaileynel4-blog]

Positive vibes please!

This week was one of ups and downs. Most of you know that I am a huuuge dog lover. I have always loved them and tend to be that person who tries to pet every dog that I walk by. In college, I was feeling deprived of dog attention, so I asked my roommates if it was weird if i went to the dog park even though I didn’t have a dog. They quickly said yes, that is weird and that I need to find a better way to deal with my doggy obsession. I have carried this love for dogs to Thailand. My previous blogs talk about dogs briefly and the life that they have here in Thailand. It has been one of the harder adjustments for me. The dogs are not viewed the same as they are back home. They sleep outside, don’t have doggy beds, get fed usually one meal a day, don’t go for lovely walks in the park and usually have crazy amounts of fleas. I know that I cant save all the dogs in the world(definitely will try though) but i can certainly try to make their lives a little better while i am here. In the village, I try to give the dogs as much affection as i can, make sure that they get a nice big dinner and close the gates at night so they don’t get in as many dog fights. This week was a hard one cause one of the dogs at the main homestay house was poisoned and died. His name was Samuel L Jackson aka Sam and he was one of my doggies that ran with me on my morning runs. Sam was the alpha dog in the village and most of the volunteers didn’t care for him cause he was a bully. I knew that he was misunderstood and just needed a little love. It was definitely hard to get the news about him. I was devastated but also even more determined to protect the other dogs as best i can. These dogs are all incredibly kind to humans and just melt in your arms when you give them a little belly scratch. With that being said, PLEASE spoil your dogs. They are incredibly lucky to have you all take care of them. If you feel like you want to do more in your community and help more dogs than just your own, there are so many shelters improving the lives of animals that are less fortunate. The pixie project is a wonderful shelter centrally located in SE Portland that makes it super easy and fun to volunteer. Make your difference in the world, whether its large or small, just try to help those around you that need it most!

Here are some of the doggies in the village!

I haven’t wrote a blog in awhile. I don’t want them to be forced and want them to be “real” of what I am thinking and going through. I most certainly am not expecting to be a professional blogger because lets be honest, i am a mediocre writer and struggle figuring out where to put the damn comma!! I am just hoping that you all enjoy what I am saying and know that I am speaking from the heart and directly to you. I have never been one to write in a journal or certainly become a blogger but these past few months have challenged me ways that I didn’t think it would. I left all that i had known, my friends, family, comfort zone and routine of life. I was needing something new and unpredictable. I wanted to know what it was like to be completely on my own. To most, that may seem crazy but I loved when i lived on my own and wanted to try it over 7,000 miles away hahaha The first month of being abroad was hard for me. I was adjusting to a new culture, learning how much sweat my body could produce, struggling with the amount of spice was in the food, learning to know that it was okay to be on my own and simply understand myself on a whole new level. My generation is one to think outside the box and really take the path unknown. More and more people are finding ways to travel, see the world and learn the depths of themselves. We want more from ourselves and are determined to find it. Not everyone has to travel but finding ways to gain depth and experience is what its all about. I tip my hat at those who are living life in whatever form they think living is! My way of living life is not living abroad but enjoying all the beautiful things around me. Appreciating every minute of where I am and not taking it for granted. Just yesterday, I was in a park talking to a fellow traveler, when all of a sudden there was a huge crowd of people participating in a Jazzercise class. I watched with a huge smile on my face and then of course joined in! I looked like a complete goober but had the best time ever! If it looks fun, then do it. That’s been my motto lately and so far has worked out for me!

One last thing and then i will stop rambling on about being happy and positive! I mean, that is part of the title of my blog, so you had to know what I would primarily be talking about. A few years ago, I had a really good friend come close to dying. At the time, we were not that close but over the years he is now one person that I am so thankful to have in my life. I don’t want to go into the details but I learned a very very valuable lesson that I have carried with me since then. I learned that life can be very short and that you can never really predict what will happen. The people in your life are what make you keep on going (well at least for me) and you need to show everyday how much they mean to you cause you never know when they may not be here anymore. I really wanted to make sure that the people in my life knew that I loved them and that I plan on having them know that for as long as they are in my life. It something that I will continually try to work on. I also realized that I cant sit back and let my life pass me by. I needed to start working towards what I love and figuring out what I wanted to do. I guess that is why I am here, doing what I am doing! It is great to have experiences on your own and i love adventuring by myself but lets be honest, its really fun to go to a concert with all your close friends, have epic camping trips by beautiful lakes, have deep life talks over multiple drinks at happy hour, huge thanksgiving dinners with your family, have those laughing attacks with your best friend that by the end of it you may or may not have peed your pants a little or have really fun competitive family game nights (My grandma is the most competitive 80 year old lady i have ever met and always seems to win!). At the end of the day, the people in your life are all that you have, so why not make the most of it! Okay, i am done ranting now :)

Thanks for the unconditional love from you all and see you in August for a couple weeks!

Happy bachelorette weekend KC and hope that you all have a wonderful time!

I am thankful for nature. There are these trees in Thailand that have amazing root systems and I get all crazy hippie over them when i see them. Today, I laughed at how my sense of direction is so horrible. I still cant figure out where i am half the time. Some things will never change! What are you thankful for and what made you laugh recently?

Cheers!

[kaileynel4-blog]

Just be you and people will notice...

This week has been a special one. The elephants have been wonderful, as always, but the people this week were something else. If you have read my previous blogs, aka my parents, then you know that I do yoga every morning. I have the priviladge of having a wonderful job where I can wake up at a reasonable time, go for a short run and do a half hour of yoga, all before i technically have to work. I have been doing this since the first few days I started working. I wanted to take time for myself and start my mornings out on the right foot. The past few weeks some of my coworkers have started to join in on the yoga sessions. First it was one, then two and now three of them have joined. Now that’s all cool and dandy, but this week was a moment that I will never forget. Let me give you some background into Mrs.Mahn, so you can understand just how amazing it was for her to join in on yoga. Mrs.Mahn is a bad ass lady. Her and her husband, Mr. Suay, were part of the first family that Bamboo started working with and have continued to build a pretty special relationship with. They have kindly let the Surin team live with them for about 5 years and have helped with cooking us meals, taking care of all the volunteers, assisting with projects and helping integrate Bamboo into the community. Mr.Suay is a pretty rad dude and has to know how lucky he is to have such a baller ass wife. She has this presence about her that reminds me of my mother. She always is smiling, incredibly kind and continues to take care of everyone around her. Also, she knows how obessed I am with Mangos and always tells me when she has picked a fresh batch! I mean, what more could you want from a woman?? So, when I started my Thursday morning yoga session and saw her grab a mat to join, I couldn’t help but smile from ear to ear. I never told her to join (only because i cant speak thai to properly invite her) and I always thought that the thai people just made fun of me for being a silly foreigner that likes to workout. The whole session I was beaming and so touched that she joined in. It may seem like a silly thing to be so excited about but living abroad in a small village, where you cant really communicate with the people that you are living with, little gestures like these mean a whole fucking lot. And she joined in the next day as well! Needless to say, I am going to do some reasearch this weekend and find some new yoga moves so that she keeps coming back!

It is very important to be true to yourself. Find the things in your days that rejuvenate you, make you smile, bring lightness to your day or simply make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, cause these are the things that keep you going. For months, no one joined in on my yoga sessions and i just kept on doing them cause they made me feel better. Slowly but surely, my coworkers started to take notice and asked to join in. Now, they too are finding time to find lightness, feel rejuvenatated and simply spend more time together. The things that you are passionate about or that make you get up every morning can bring the same joys to others as well. Don’t be discouraged just because no one else is doing it. The thing that matters most is what you get out of it and if you love doing it. If you show passion for it, then others will see that and feel inspired to do the same. Its pretty amazing how inspiration can attract others to feel the same.

So enough with yoga talk and rejuvenating your soul...today, I woke up feeling uncertain about if I wanted to go to the gym or not. I have started the second season of 13 reasons why so my Netflix and chill game is pretty strong right now. As i was about to make the decision to just do a little ab workout and call it a day, my adorable coworker Tum (who joins in on yoga) asked if i wanted to go to the gym with him. It was just the spark of inspiration that I needed so i decided to just say YES. After our workout, he asked if i wanted to go to the sauna and get a local thai scrub. I had no idea what the “local thai scrub” meant but again, i said YES. As we approached the local sauna/scrub place i noticed that we are driving through a temple area. THE SAUNA WAS ON TEMPLE GROUNDS!! This just added to the coolness of the whole experience. We get there and in natural thai fashion we were greeted with smiles and hellos. Tum tells me that we are going to scrub ourselves with a coffee, turmeric and other herbs concoction all over our bodies. Again, i said YES and started rubbing it all over my body. After we were covered head to toe, we sat in the sauna to really exfoliate and release all of our toxins. We did this a couple times until i couldn’t take the heat anymore. After we rinsed off, my skin was the softest it has ever been. I mean, my skin is giving a babies bottum a run for its money! Thats how soft we are talking. This whole experience is something that I will not forget and definitely plan to do it more often. Oh and did i mention that it cost me about 70 baht...that’s roughly 2 dollars!!! 2 FUCKING DOLLARS! As you read this paragraph, you may have noticed that I capitalized the word YES. The reason for that is because if I hadn’t said YES, than the following chain of events would not have happened. Sometimes you just have to say YES. YES to getting out of your comfort zone, YES to a new job, YES to a first date, YES to a spontaneous weekend trip, YES to another round of drinks, YES to marrying someone, YES to adopting a dog, Yes to an evening bike ride, YES to climbing a mountain, YES to a hike, YES to eating another piece of cake, YES to going to the gym even though you didn’t really feel like it and YES to just about any other situation that slightly sparks your interest. You cant predict the future...now, that may be a shock to some of you, since we try to pretty much plan our whole lives out. We will never be able to predict the future, so stop trying to do it. Its fun to say YES to opportunities and see where things go. This morning I was going to be lazy and do my laundry but instead I had another amazing cultural experience to add to the books. Life is too short for you to second guess things, say NO to opportunities cause you are too scared or in my case, lazy. Just say YES and see what happens! Here is a photo of Tum and I all covered in the scrub concoction :)

And here is another selfie with the volunteers and the elephants! I plan on enjoying life and i hope you do the same!

Sending love to all those back home and miss the hell out of you guys! Happy memorial weekend and be safe out there!

Cheers!

[kaileynel4-blog]

I think i like dogs more than humans...

I’m Sitting in my room, thinking about where that gecko went i saw an hour ago and how ants literally get into everything...these are thoughts that I never thought i would have on such a daily basis. When i lived in Portland, my regular morning thoughts were usually what i needed to buy at the grocery store after work, what outfit i was going to wear to work and if i brought enough food for lunch (generally food based). My daily thoughts have drastically changed in a short period of time. Aside from the whereabouts of geckos, I usually wake up thinking about the weather and how much i will sweat today or if i can get one more day out of my shirt and just put on an extra layer of deodorant. I am slowly starting to retrain my brain how to think. Learning how to be less stressed is actually more difficult that you think! In our society, people are always over thinking situations, trying to be better than the next person and thinking waaaaay to far in the future. Don’t get me wrong, it is good to plan for the future but when you are so focused on planning for what may come, you miss out on what is right in front of you. Anyone that has ever lived with me, will know how weird I am about running out of essential supplies. I always would worry about what would happen if we ran out of toilet paper, tooth paste, milk, FOOD, gas, floss, cooking oil, etc. I always was planning my next trip to the store to make sure that we wouldn’t run out. My old roommate, Sarah, was the first person to point out how crazy i was about this. Now, that I am in a country where most of those essentials are not even important, i find myself changing these habits. I now have gained a sense of freedom. It may seem like a silly thing to feel freedom from, but worry and over thinking can bog you down more than you think. I now wake up and have no set plans for my weekends (well usually)....pretty much i ask myself, do i wake up and do yoga or do i be a lazy blob for another hour and drink my coffee? There are already so many pressures that society puts on us so why add more to that?

This week was my first time being back at the village in a couple weeks. I realized how much i missed it. The people, the dogs, the cute little markets and of course the elephants. Just being in the presence of such amazing creatures makes me feel immediately aware that I am where I am supposed to be right now in my life. For years, i was in search of something that I thought I would never attain and now, I can finally say that I am passionate about what I am doing. The sad thing is, not a lot of people can say that about their job. I was one of those people for far too long. I loved my coworkers but was most definitely working for the weekends. Nothing wrong with that but I hope that everyday feels like a weekend. That may sound like a silly millennial thing to say but why make your job, which is such a huge part of your life, the thing you dread doing the most. This week i had one of the volunteers tell me as we were driving back to Surin from the village, that I keep staying on the path i am on. Don’t get discouraged and keep following your passions. Most of the volunteers say something similar to this but this woman had so much passion behind what she was saying. I could truly tell that she believed in me. I am not saying that I don’t have friends and family that aren’t supportive of what I ask doing but to have someone that i only met 5 days ago tell me this, was pretty inspiring. Find your passion and chase it! It’s that easy :)

So about a month and a half ago there was this adorable dog that had puppies in the villlage! Her name is cow (which is white in thai haha) and she is the sweetest dog. Her puppies are running around acting like crazy toddlers right now. My favorite thing about puppies is how quickly they can get exhausted. One minute they are wrestling their brother and seem to have all the energy in the world and then by the next minute they are passed out mid wrestling move! Now everyone knows that i am obsessed with dogs...always have been. Since i was a kid, I have always said how I would love to rescue all the dogs from the shelters and have a huge plot of land where they can all run free. Yes, that is my dream job. Anyways, cow, the mother dog, has had 3 previous litters of puppies in only a few years time. The dogs in Thailand are not treated like the dogs back home. They live a rough dog life here and have to litterally fight for survival. The amount of dogs that are not spayed or neutered and end up having multiple litters of puppies is extremely high. This is where my love for dogs comes in. When i found out how many litters she has already had, i knew that I couldn’t let it happen again and offered to pay for her to be spayed. I cant bare to see cow go through another pregnancy and have more dogs. This Friday, we are taking her to the vet and she is getting fixed!! If there is anything from this experience that i have learned so far, it is to help out in whatever way you can. I cant adopt this dog (at least right now hehe) but i can improve her life by getting her spayed so she wont have to go through the stress of having puppies anymore. So my last message for this blog is, do your part. Make an effort to make the world a better place. Odds are your won’t regret it and will continue to do it :)

Lastly, i wanted to thank my wonderful mother for sending me a care package. It was filled with yummy chocolate (thanks to my old coworker Emilee), tea, brownies, gold fish, bomb organic soap, garbage grabbers and a huge box of dog biscuits for all my dogs i love so much here in the village. Thank you for taking the time, effort and thought of sending me this stuff. It truly means a lot and i love you very much!

Happy birthday to all those May babies...Kyle, Marshall, Katers and my Dad. Love you guys and hope you have baller ass birthdays!

Sending lots of hugs back home...none of that awkward side hug shit. I’m talking those good hugs that make you smile from ear to ear... lots of those and of course some love too :)

[kaileynel4-blog]

Be kind to all

This past week I have been in Cambodia getting my visa. I cant believe that I have been here for 2 months already! I am starting to feel comfortable and really enjoying my time in Thailand. The village is my second home and I cant believe how comfortable and happy i feel when i am there. The simplicity of life there is something that all should experience at some point in there lives.

Last week in the village, I had a group that ranged from 17 to 46. Surprisingly, they all seemed to get along and were able to enjoy each others company. My favorite thing about this job is that I get to be apart of peoples life changing experiences. Over a year ago, I came to volunteer in the village and it changed my view on life. Now, I am back and chasing my dreams. By the end of each week with the volunteers, I am able to see the transformation that they have gone through. Most of them realize how most material things that they hold such a high value to back home are not really important. Others are inspired to do better in the world when they go back and some just find it a good experience that has pressed the restart button for them. Whatever they have gained from the experience, I get to be a part of it and help make their experience all that it can be. Usually at the end of each week I ask them what their favorite experience was. It’s a good time for reflection but also I love to hear the differences in what people find most memorable. I was over joyed to hear that most people said that they loved the earth day event that we put on in the village. It was a personal project for me that I really was excited about. With the help of other staff members we were able to inform the local villagers about the importance of recycling and not burning their rubbish. If you don’t know already, plastic waste and garbage is a HUGE problem in SE Asia. When you go to the store they give you a plastic bag to put your plastic bag in...no joke! Every time i say no thank you to a plastic bag, they look at me like I am a crazy person! The awareness and education of how incredibly horrible this is for the environment is not properly addressed and Bamboos is really trying to tackle this. The earth day reiterated why I quit my job and moved across the country to follow what makes my soul happy. Being able to see a small elephant village in SE Asia recycle and hopefully be on the path to slowly changing the way they view their waste is what it is all about. Change does not happen over night. It takes a lot of little wins that will eventually give you the end goal you worked for. If there is ever anything that you are working towards and feel discouraged, just remember to celebrate your little wins along the way. Don’t be so hard on yourself and just keep on remembering why you are doing it!

Now to Cambodia...this little town is incredibly different from Surin. It is a huge hot spot for backpackers and ex pats so there are a lot more foreigners than i am used to seeing when going out. It was really amazing to meet other bamboo staff members and hear their stories, Get to eat food other than thai and go out dancing! I forgot how much i love dancing and it rejuvenated my soul. The girls at the office in Siem Reap are all so kind and really made me feel welcome. It made me really think about all my friends back home and how truly lucky I am to be able to have them and also meet people abroad that have the same kindness. So here is a shout out to my friends back home that I have shared so many amazing memories with and will continue to do so. Love you all and thank you for being fucking awesome!!! Where ever you go there is going to be people that change your life for the better and make you really appreciate everyone that is in your life. I just want to say one last thing, please be kind to one another (just as Ellen says everyday on her show). Even if you are having a bad day someone else could be having a worse day, so remember to spread that love. It is easier to be nice than mean and i truly believe that! Have manners, be respectful, invest in Karma, go the extra mile, pick up someone’s tab, pay it forward and just spread some love. The easiest thing to be is nice so why not be it!

Hope you all have had a good week so far and of course sending lots of love to my family, friends and pretty much anyone that needs a little extra :)

Until next time!

[kaileynel4-blog]

Feeling like a celebrity

This week has been one for the record books. I started the week off by going to Khao Yai National Park for two days on my own! Since it is the hot season, I didn’t have to go to the village this week since we are so slow. I took this as an opportunity to do a little Kailey adventure time. I made a deal with myself that I would do one new adventure each month. I want to see all parts of Thailand while i am here and take advantage of it. So, this month I went to the National Park! The adventure started and ended with the train ride. The train was almost booked up so the only seats left were 3rd class, where there is no AC, some fans that work and standing room only, if you didn’t have an assigned seat. On the way to the park, the train ride was fine. Not too crowded and i was able to sit next to the window, so I had a lovely warm breeze most of the ride. I will talk about the way back shortly...Once I arrived in Khao Yai, I was overwhelmed with how beautiful the scenery was! So many lush plants and all sorts of jungle noises. I was immediately stoked to be there! The first day we went to a bat cave that smelled like you would think a bat cave with no air flow would smell...the bat shit smell was pretty overwhelming at times but the cool factor outweighed the stench most of the time. This cave had roughly 2,000 bats that lived inside it and 3 different bat species! This also doubled as a Buddha cave, so that means monks would go down in the pitch black cave and meditate. The dedication monks have to their religion is pretty amazing. After the bat cave, we went to go see over 2 million bats fly out of a bat cave. Now, 2 million bats doesn’t seem like that many, well i thought it didn’t, but when you see them all fly out of a tiny hole on the side of a mountain, it starts to look like a lot. I am just glad that we didn’t go in the cave cause i am pretty sure the shit smell would make us all pass out! Aside from seeing the solar eclipse in Oregon this past year and swimming with elephants, this was the 3rd dopest thing i have seen in my life. The fact that these bats do this every night at 6pm for about 2 hours is amazing. It was truly facinating to see this natural phenomenon. As the bats came out of the cave, they made a spiral line throughout the sky. Words cant begin to describe how cool this was but i have a short video to show them flying out of the cave, so maybe you can get a better picture of it! It is attached to the blog post on facebook since i cant put it directly on here!

The next day at the Park was more jungle exploration and seeing monkeys, snakes (no king cobras yet, sorry Kyle), crocodiles and a wild elepahnt! It was amazing to be able to be fully submerged back in nature. I didn’t realize how much i missed hiking around and it made me really appreciate how beatuiful the Pacific North West is. I am trying to remember, that everyday I am lucky to have nice weather and sunshine, so I need to take advantage of this while i can. Growing up in Oregon, you cherished those random sunny days and made sure that you took advantage of them. Living in a place with constant sunshine, I still need to remember to take advantage of the days and do some exploring. Life is too short to not try something new every once in a while..or in my case, once a month! I hope you all do the same even if the weather is not sunny. Go to a new bar and try a new beer or do a little rain dance. Just get out there and seize the day!

Now i will briefly talk about the train ride back. If you ever wanted to know what it felt like to be a sardine, i can now tell you. As i got on the train, i could barely get to my seat. There were four people squeezing into 2 chairs, people standing everywhere and no AC. I was definitely in for a cultural experience. I finally squeezed my way to my chair but it was filled with 4 Thai people. I felt bad to make them move but i was not about to stand for 5 hours on the train. They were very nice so i tried to share my seat as best i could. The first 2 hours were fine because i had this adorable little girl sitting across from me so she was constant entertainment. As the train ride got hotter and I started slipping off of my seat due to sweat, i was quickly ready to get off this damn train. All i have to say, is thank god for music and the headphones Marshall gave me. I don’t know if i would have been in such high spirits if I didn’t have music to listen to and distract me from the amount of sweat i was producing. Sorry to the girl who sat next to me and had to smell me. I am pretty sure that I hit new levels of body odor and she had to endure that smell for 5 hours. Either way I survived and i would do it again!

Now, we all get excited for New Years and love to clelebrate it. I always thought that we knew how to ring in the new year, but I was completely wrong after celebrating the Thai new Year, Songkran. The tradition of Songkran is pretty much a huge water fight for 2 whole days and people coming up to you a putting baby powder all over your face! You may be wondering why a water fight and baby powder. Well, apparently its a sign of a new start and the baby powder reperesents new beginnnigs. As a foreigner in Thailand, you already get more attention than you want. People come up to me all the time and comment on how beautiful my white skin is. Here in Thailand, being white is a sign of wealth because that means that you don’t work in hot fields. They also just point and stare at you all the time. I am use to this by now, but on Songkran it hit new levels. My coworker and i, Heidi, (she’s from America) walked down the main drag in Surin during songkran. IT WAS CRAZY! I now can relate to how celebrities feel everyday. People would see us coming down the street and would point and get their water guns ready for us. It was absolutely insane to see how many thai people came up to us and smeared baby powder all over our faces and dumped buckets of water on us. I hope that you all can experience Songkran in Thailand at some point in your life. You will not be disappointed. The craziest thing about this holiday is that the whole country is shut down and everyone participates in their huge water fight. Can you imagine if the US did this. There would be riots and fights, but in Thailand everyone is just there to have a good time and splash some water on you. It was a reminder of how peaceful Thai culture is and that the US could learn a few things from them.

I challenge you all to do something out of your comfort zone this week. Doesn’t have to be big but just try something different. Go out on your own and do something for yourself. To attract happy, positive people in your life, you have to be happy first. Everyone has a different idea of what happiness is but go get it and enjoy it!

Sending extra love to my family and friends this week.

[kaileynel4-blog]

I LOVE TOAST

Bread is by far my favorite food. Well, actually its tied with potatoes but for this blog i will be talking about toast and how truly amazing it is. Every weekend back from the village, I go to the local store and stock up on breakfast making items...eggs, potatoes, onion, garlic, cabbage and whatever green veggies i can find. This week, i saw that there was fresh baked bread. If you have ever been to SE Asia, you will know that they need to step up their bread game. They don’t understand how delicious a fresh loaf of sourdough bread is. Anyways, I was absolutely pissed at myself for not buying a French loaf of bread weeks ago. How could i have deprived myself of the delicious taste of fresh baked bread!!! I hurried home and quickly started to make myself some breakfast. Now, most of you may not know this, but I am one of those cooks that eats as i cook. By the time i am done cooking, usually I am not even that hungry because I have snacked so much. This morning was different. I just kept on eating the loaf of bread like a bottomless pit. I literally had to hide it from myself and not make direct eye contact, so i could have some left to make toast for my breakfast. Yes, i am that weak when it comes to bread. Now, this may seem relatable for most and I have done this many times before, but this morning was different. I have never been so happy eating my toast before. It changed my mood (probably because i was hangry) and made me think about how lucky I am to have the littlest thing to make me absolutely happy in that moment. In life, we are always rushing to get to the next thing and we forget to really appreciate the moments that lead to it. I challenge you to enjoy the small moments that feed your happiness. Stop and smell the flowers blooming, cuddle your dog, eat a second piece of cake, skip down the side walk, sip wine with your eyes closed so you can really taste its full body, give your loved ones a big hug, run into the ocean with your arms wide open, dance to your favorite song, laugh so hard that you may pee yourself a little and please, eat your favorite piece of toast and enjoy that wonderful sound of bread crunching. Life is supposed to be filled with happy moments so start enjoying them!

Now, that I got that out of the way, lets talk elephants, Thailand heat and my pink bike!This month bamboo is slower than usual with customer/volunteers due to the aggressive Thailand heat. Shockingly, people don’t want to work in 100 degree weather with 80% humidity! I keep on thinking when its super hot that it cant get any hotter than this, but my coworkers keep on telling me that it does. I am not sure how I feel about the fact that it will get hotter but I am up for the challenge. Bring it on sun. I am ready to sweat where my mustache would be if i was a guy, always smell like B.O and constantly wish that I was sitting by a pool drinking coconut water. The mustache comment was put in there cause, this week I realized that my upper lip sweats. I don’t think i have really ever had this encounter until now and I am still not sure how i feel about it.

There has been a mysterious pink bike infront of the volunteer house. Apparently, bamboo bought it for a past staff member so they could ride around the city. This week, I decided to get the tires fixed and see what she can do! Well, big pink has been sitting outside for awhile and makes all sorts of weird noises when biking. My dork points definitely went up after cruising around on it yesterday. The one thing about myself is that I don’t really give a flying fuck (sorry, but had to use it for a dramatic effect) what people think about me and especially in a foreign country, where I don’t really speak their language. The bike gets me to my destinations quicker, I am able to explore the city more, and it has a cute flowery basket on the front! It has given me a sense of adventure and freedom. I now have my own way to get somewhere instead of relying on someone else or paying for a Tuk tuk. I am ready for urban cruising!! I was able to bike to the gym last night too! I took my first workout class, where I had no idea what the hell the instructor was saying and continually had the class watching/laughing at me. Regardless, it was a blast and i plan to go next week!

This week, I was reminded again, why elephants are the coolest and swimming with them is life changing. I was feeling lazy, sweaty and grumpy Thursday. Probably, due to the hangover from the beers I had the night before, but either way I was not feeling it. I told myself that I must go with one of the groups to the river to walk the elephants. It was a sure way to change my mood around. I saw one of my coworkers feeling the effects of the beers from the night before, so I convinced her to join in on the elephant fun. Once we started walking to the river, I could already tell that my mood had changed. There is this special secret power that elephants (puppies too) have and they can without a doubt make someone happy. I mean just looking at them makes you smile but when you get to swim with them and get sprayed in the face by them, you cant help but smile. For now, elephants and dogs are the two things that can change my mood around every time and I am grateful for just that.

As always, sending lots of love to my family, friends and right now, my dog Zoey. I miss how your excitement to see me turns into a weird snorting episode. Either way, i take it as a compliment!

Until next time!

[kaileynel4-blog]

The feeling of being paid in a different currency

This week I received my first pay check...I actually have been in Thailand long enough to get a paycheck!! It’s a very unique feeling to get paid in a different currency. I never would have thought a year ago, that I would be back here and working for Bamboo. I never imagined that I would be chasing my dreams of working abroad for a company that has the same morals, values and goals in life as i do. Being able to 100% support what Bamboo is working for and what they are doing to better the world is an amazing feeling. Getting my first Thai wage is more than a paycheck, it represents determination, independence, courage and a bit of craziness! I am proud of what I am doing and love every week to wake up in the village knowing that we are one step closer to improving the lives of the elephants as well as the village.

This job has taught me a lot already about myself and what I really am capable of. I have already had to get over my fear of public speaking. Yes, i have overcome my horrible speech at my sister wedding and feel more comfortable infront of large crowds. Within my second week I had to start doing Elephant Education presentations to all the groups and at first I was nervous but also very excited to face my fear and conquer it! There are two huge fears that I have in this world and I can say that I have overcome one of them and working on the other one. I do not want fear to control my life and have made it my goal to overcome it. My second fear, is birds. Yes, birds. I know that sounds ridiculous but they are incredibly sketchy, untrustworthy and not cuddly what so ever! The village has chickens (my arch nemesis) everywhere!!! So with time, I will get over my fear but with lots and lots of baby steps. I still get an elevated heart rate when I walk past them and run quickly past so they don’t attack me. I challenge those who are reading my blog to think about your fears. Why do you have them? Where did they originate from? And how can you overcome them? Life is not meant to be lived in fear but lived with freedom, adventure and curiosity!

Now that we have that out of the way, lets talk about baby puppies!! This week one of the dogs in the village had 3 puppies. They are adorable and I am already obessed with them. The saddest part about this is that its the the dogs 4th time having puppies. The problem with dogs in this area is that it is too expensive to neuter or spay the dogs so they just keep on having them. The survival rate is about half and then they have to grow up learning to be tough and sticking up for themselves. The dogs in the village are ruthless and there is definitely a hierarchy. If you are at the bottom, pretty much your doggy life sucks and you are always defending yourself. Bamboo is trying to do spay and neuter clinics as much as they can but that still doesn’t stop the aggressive dog fights or bullying. I thought elementary school was bad but these dogs are on a whole new level of bullying! So please love the dogs in your life and spoil the hell out of them. They are lucky to not worry about when they are going to eat and if they will survive through the night of dog fights. Bamboo is doing what they can to help the dogs in the village but what I try to do is give them as much love as i can. Sometimes this means that they follow me but I am totally okay with having a parade of dogs around me :)

Lastly, I want to talk about the week i had. There were only 2 volunteers this week so it was pretty mellow. We were able to go to the school and help out with the kids. This was the highlight of my week! The kids were adorable and loved playing musical chairs. At first, they were a little reluctant but once they started to understand the game more, the competitiveness came out! It was hilarious to see 3 year olds get competitive and have strategy with musical chairs. There was this one kid who understood how to win. He would walk fast around the empty places and then slow down when he walked around the chairs. It worked because he won. It was interesting to see that even at age 3, kids are already getting a sense of competition. Anytime I play with the kids in the village, I think of my neice and nephew. Particularly, my nephew. I realized that Camden has more energy and adventure than most kids his age and I hope that he never will grow out of that! The children are a constant reminder to let go and be silly. Laugh a lot and always continue to play. Life is supposed to be fun, so do things that make it exciting and fun!

I hope back home the weather is getting nicer and the flowers are starting to bloom. This next month is going to be hot as hell and I will let you know how I survive! This week I am thankful for my niece and nephew. I am lucky to have them in my life and I hope they know how much i love them. What made me laugh this week, was last night when I found a bar that sold IPA beers from America! One of my coworkers tried it and her reaction to a beer that actually has hop flavor was hilarious. She said “how can you drink this, its horrible!” Just a reminder of how different the cultures are and how lucky the NW is to have such wonderful tasting beers! So please drink a rogue dead guy ale for me, a joes IPA and also sip some delicious Rose for me from Willamette Vineyard.

Sending lots and lots of love to my family and friends. And a special shout out to Kat for putting together the PDX Trash Tribe clean up this month! I hope it was a succcess and that you all had fun :)

Until next time...Oh and i just want to say, I didn’t accidently delete the post this time! I finally overcame my fat finger issue!!

[kaileynel4-blog]

Smelling the flowers

I swear that I am not lying when i say that I pressed the stupid X button again and deleted my previous blog post. This damn touch screen is driving me crazy and I need to not have such fat fingers! Anyways, after i had a mini tantrum, i am able to come back and give it another try.

This week was a good one. I learned a lot from the group that I had and was able to compare the difference in younger volunteers and older. The main difference is that the older ones party way more and love their Thai beer haha. Looking back on this week, there are two things that stand out in my mind. The first, is picking jasmine flowers for garlands to sell at the temples. I LOVE JASMINE FLOWERS, so naturally I was in my element and loving it. I just wanted to curl up under one of the jasmine bushes and lay there all day. The smell was amazing and even when i went on my morning runs i could smell it as i passed the field. It was such a wonderful way to spend the afternoon. Besides the smell, i was able to chat with the volunteers and hear their stories. Everyone was really relaxed and just enjoying the company of each other while being surrounded by the amazing smell. One of the local ladies let me wear her official flower picking apron and needless to say, i was pretty pumped about it! I posted a photo below. This experience reminded me to always slow down and smell the flowers cause they wont be blooming forever.

The second moment from this week, was the dance party on Thursday night. My fellow Thai coordinator, Fang, taught us a couple traditional Thai dances. Pretty much we all need to work on our dance skills but it was awesome to see almost everyone dancing around to Thai music. We also decided to teach her some of our traditional dances...the macarana and YMCA.

I have officially been gone for over a month now...time flies quickly and so I am actively trying to make my difference in the community. Many of you may know, that back home my sister and i started monthly clean ups around the Portland area. Shout out to Kat for continuing them! The idea came from when i was in Thailand last year and saw the problem of plastic waste in the village. Now that i am back, I really want to see what I can do about the problem. My first step is bringing awareness to the volunteers so they know how to properly recycle and also educate them on how much of a problem plastic is in the world. Then we move on to the villagers. The next steps are in the process of being worked on but we have to set up the ground work before we can tackle the bigger issue, so more details to come in the future!

I was reflecting this morning on the struggles of living in a country where your cant speak the language. The one thing that I have found to appreciate about the situation is being able to see how there are other ways to express how you care about people than verbally. The homestay ladies in the village are incredibly kind and always greet me with a smile. I cant understand what they are usually saying to me but through their gestures, smiles and hugs the point gets across. They all know that I am obessed with the mangos here and I accidentally left some in the village over the weekend last week. On Tuesday i was talking to my manager and he said that Pee Mon (one of the sweetest ladies ever, aside from my grandmother, of course) found my mangos that i left, saved them and peeled them for me. Her kind gesture made my day and i quickly ran to thank her and also eat the mangos. It just reminded me that you can show you care about others through action and thoughtfulness. Words are good but action is more powerful.

This moring I was happily hanging my laundry up on the balcony and walked downstairs to grab a bite to eat. I heard the door slam and ran up stairs. The wind or a creepy ghost, had slammed the balcony door shut with my phone and iPad on it. Now that may not seem like a big deal, but when you are in a foreign country, your phone is the only way that you are able to call people for help and I also don’t have English speaking neighbors so that wasn’t going to work. My first attempt at breaking in was the old bobby pin trick...in the movies they make it seem so easy and they open the doors every time. I did not open it and ended up wasting one of my bobby pins. My second attempt was trying to use my credit card. Again, the movies make it look so easy. I did not open it and may have ruined the chip reader on my card. Mom and Dad, i am sorry for the next part and i want to say that i was not hurt in the recovery of my phone. My third attempt was to scale the side of the house while standing on top of an upside down garbage can. This did not work either cause my upper body has no strength and i could not do a full body pull up to the balcony. So i had to get creative....You are probably thinking, why don’t you just use a ladder. Well, I don’t have one but i did think about going to buy one. I then saw the table that the stove is on in the kitchen and used that. It was still too short so i had to put the garbage can on it and then swing my leg up on the balcony edge and pull myself up. I felt like a champion once i reached the balcony. In the photo it doesn’t look that high but it was much more dangerous than it appears ;) The lesson I learned is that when in a foreign country by yourself, sometimes you have to just rely on yourself and get to the solution. I am completly out of my comfort zone without my friends and family to call when in a state of panic, so I am learning how to not panic and tackle whatever problem i have on my own. Also, I need to gain some upper body strength :)

This week i am grateful for my fun co worker fang who showed us how to dance. What made me laugh was the really drunk guy from my group this week who claimed he wasn’t drunk, but could not even properly say the words that he wasn’t drunk!

Love my family and friends and sending extra love to all of those that have March birthdays!

Until next time!

[kaileynel4-blog]

Let go and chill out

Hello from Surin! This is my second time trying to write this entry...i pressed the delete button again. I don’t know how i keep on doing it but it is driving me absolutely crazy!

This week was another amazing week. We had a huge storm and the power went out temporarily again. The coolest thing about when the power goes out is how the locals don’t seem to be affected by it. They just carry on their way and adapt to it. I have quickly realized how resiliant and adaptable Thai people are. They quickly just lit some candles and continued to make dinner. The craziest thing is that they have less resources than we do and still seem to not freak out or worry about when the power will come on. Its really inspiring to see this and learn from it. I really am starting to see what is important and how to just let go. Thai people are really good at accepting what the situation is and moving on.

This week i had a really amazing moment happen. After giving the elephant education presentation to one of the groups, a lady came up to be and started asking me about my story. She was interested in how i ended up in Thailand cause her daughter is currently struggling to find her passion and what truly makes her happy in life. I told her about the book that i just finished reading (again, thank you collins for giving it to me!) and how it gave me a different perspective on certain things in life. Before i left for Thailand, Collins had the genius idea to put a return address on the inside of the book and my name (I also put his in there as well) so that we could see where the book travelled to and everyone that it helped along the way. I realized as i was talking to her, that her daughter was the next person who needed to read the book. Needless to say, the lady was thrilled that I wanted to give her the book and she said that she would defintlety have her pass it along once she is done! I am really excited to see where the book travels to and the people that it will help because it helped me priotorize what is really important in my life and how i need to chase after my dreams.

Now lets talk elephants because i know that’s why you all are reading this blog! This week i was with the volunteer group and was able to hear the stories of their first time walking and swimming with the elephants. It is my favorite part of my job. Seeing how excited they get when they talk about it and how they descibe the connection that they feel with the elephant. It is a constant reminder that i am where i need to be right now! Below is the best photo that someone could ever have taken with an elephant. The timing of the photo is perfect and it just shows how amazing it is to be around these gentle giants!

This week i decided that i am going to try to have every group that i am with do a jumping photo. All my friends know how much i love taking jumping photos. Not a real reason except for the fact that it’s FUN! So here is my first one and i hope to have many more!

Until next time. Sending lots and lots of love back home to my friends and family!

Love you all!