kenhd

[kenhd]

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[kenhd]

kentaro hums, low and lazy, like he's agreeing but also not about to take any credit for it. he stretches his arms overhead with a crack of his back, then lets them drop behind the back of the chair, all slouched limbs and faint eye bags.

"yeah. that happens," he says, vaguely philosophical but like he's had the same conversation with a vending machine before. "one thing jams up and suddenly you're a genius on three other tracks you didn't even care about last week." he watches suzu scribble notes, head tilted just enough to make it seem like he might be analyzing him too, but it's not intense bro, more like background curiosity.

"just like, ask yourself: do you wanna be remembered or understood?" he blinks, like even he didn't expect that one to come out of his mouth. then: "or neither. could just write about your toaster or something. i once made a song about orange soda before. one of my best works." his mouth quirks up, crooked and brief. he doesn't mean it, but he kind of does. h's starting to like suzu, and he doesn't want to see him all pouty but not.

"yes, i've been stuck on this for days." there is a slight hint of a pout in suzu's tone but he's too bright of a person to truly let a pout show. instead he leaned back as he listened to the other's feedback. one version had bite and another version had flow. to be fair, suzu hadn't whittled down everything when it came to the song. he always started with lyrics and followed with the rest. he wouldn't really know which one he wanted more until music was put to it.

but he was thankful for the feedback so he leaned forward again, writing down what Ken noted for both verses in little notes. "you helped me in some ways, made it harder in others." an slightly overdramatic sigh left his mouth but his eyes were smiling.

"you are right about me being stuck in my head. at least when it comes to this song. i've been able to made headway with other songs because of though, so i guess it's not all bad."

[kenhd]

kentaro tilts his head, lets out a quiet snort that's more breath than sound. "yeah, well," he says, shoulders slouched, hoodie half unzipped cause he couldn't be bothered to finish pulling it on, "you've got that dramatic, misunderstood energy. dead poet's society fits, even if you don't wanna claim it." his voice stays flat, but not unkind. it's the kind of tone that floats on too little sleep and too many nights spent overthinking everything he never says out loud. he walks slow, like he's wading through something thick and invisible, hands stuffed in his pockets, the stairs creaking under their weight.

"interstellar's so good," he adds after a second. "love a movie that makes you feel small. cosmic dread is underrated."

he doesn't answer the fire or water thing right away. his foot taps a loose screw near the rooftop door before he finally pushes it open (only way to open), letting the cold slap him across the face. it's almost pleasant. almost real. "fire," he says eventually, stepping out into the dark. he's deadpan. "i used to burn my report cards in a metal bowl behind my house. smelled awful. felt good." he leans against the railing, half a step away from avery, watching the city blink beneath them like it's trying to stay awake too. he pulls out a crumpled pack of cigarettes, lights one, offers avery one and takes a drag. holds it in. lets the smoke hang for a second before it spills out slow.

"spiraling's kind of the default setting," he mutters. "doesn't really need a reason anymore." he flicks ash off the side. it drifts, catches the wind. "but… yeah. maybe." the cigarette glows soft in the dark, a tiny pulse of something alive between his fingers. "maybe i do." he doesn't say thank you. just lets the offer sit there, warm and strange, like a candle in a blackout.

"that is a horrible comparison, i'm nothing like the dead poet's society." was avery's first words, a little hot, testy as they fell past his lips, but they weren't cold, and they weren't rude, instead, the corner of his lips quirked up, twitching, he was visibly amused. "it was one of my favorite movies growing up. i also enjoyed interstellar a lot." is was what he decided to share, throwing quick glances at his roommate, he was quick to follow after him, glad they were leaving the stifling darkness of their dorm room together, it felt rather momentous. a start of a new friendship, perhaps.

"fire or water?" his voice was soft as he spoke, following kentaro, they made their way slowly to the rooftop, the pace they took was leisurely, and he wondered if the other had brought cigarettes with him and a lighter, he had neither on him, and he wondered for the first time how did it taste like to have smoke invade his system, and make it hard to breathe- he would probably choke on it, and make an embarrassment of himself, "sigmund freud would have something to say on that, but maybe you're secretly an arsonist, or an aquaphile. did you like to swim or set things on fire when you were younger? does it free you?" avery laughed softly his questions never serious, just a light tease; once they had stepped outside, the cool air was freeing. it rushed through and against them, and ruffled his hair, it did the same to his companion.

almost transfixed, he made his way to the railing, elbows resting on the metal, it was cool, and seeped through the fabric of his hoodie, in a way, it was also quite grounding, he breathed in, and turned his attention back on kentaro, taking in his form, how small he seemed in the darkness, under the stars, but at the same time, larger than life, "what has gotten you spiralling?" the words come out hushed, quiet under the night sky, waiting for the other to settle beside him before continuing, "do you need help finding a way out?"

[kenhd]

he squints at her, lips parted in exaggerated offense. "fine? i look fine?" he throws his hands up like that's the cruelest thing anyone's ever said to him, then slouches dramatically in the seat, head tilted back against the chair like he's in mourning. "miru. my own blood, well, fake blood, won't even gas me up. unbelievable."

he peeks at her from under his shades, a lazy grin crawling back onto his face. "also, ouch. you think i did something wrong? rude and hurtful." he snatches her drink, takes a sip without asking. "ew. tastes like grass. very on brand for you."

then he leans forward again, elbows on the table, chin resting in his palm, eyes flicking toward the window before drifting back to her. "they're gonna crucify me for this choreo. you know how i get when it's footwork heavy. my brain starts buffering like an old dvd. but it's whatever. i'll pull it off. or fake it so hard they won't know the difference." he smirks, but there’s a flicker of something tired under it. "anyway, i'm buying lunch after for a few friends. want to come?"

there were a couple of trainees around hydra that oddly reminded her of her younger sister. whether it was simply because they were younger than her or because they acted like her, but she felt like some odd older sibling figure to quite a few of them. kentaro definitely fell into that category as well.

it's why she shakes her head when he comes sitting across from her, wagging his imaginary tail like the puppy he is—she thinks he'd argue against that imagery of him, so she keeps it to herself. "you didnt' even give me a chance to answer," she states before letting out a soft chuckle. looking up, she looks at his outfit. honestly, he doesn't look all too different from usual, and it's his words that catch her attention instead.

"you look fine. you look like you," she states obviously with a roll of her eyes. "why? did you do something wrong? or are you just not ready for their cruel criticism?" it was no secret that hydra's trainers could be a little harsh, but miru doesn't think it's anything kentaro can't handle.

[kenhd]

kentaro doesn't look up at first. he's halfway through scrolling his phone, pretending he isn't rereading the same message thread from three nights ago. but then he catches the tone, the way suzu says "when you have a second" like he’s trying to soften the weight of needing help. so he exhales through his nose, tosses his phone onto the table face-down like that'll make him focus better, and leans over without bothering to shift his chair.

"you've been stuck days on this?" he mumbles, scanning the verses. there's no bite in it, just the kind of disbelief that comes with respect he reads both versions in silence, fingers tapping against the edge of the notebook. he squints, then looks at suzu. "this one," he says finally, tapping one of the versions with the corner of his nail. "the rhythm feels cleaner. like, if you're singing it low, it'll land better.'

he pauses, then shrugs. "but the other one's got more teeth. kinda depends if you want it to hurt or haunt." he leans back again, half-grinning, "you're close though. just stuck in your own head."

and open!

he chosen target was anyone that didn't look too busy. he chose lunch for that reason. there were enough trainee's passing that someone would sit at the table next to him eventually. he was too focused to actually eat himself, all he had were a bag of chips and some water. no, in front of him as his laptop, a notebook and phone. he had ran into a bit of writers block and it was lasting a few days, not a few hours. no matter how many times he turned back to this set of lyrics, something didn't click. it help him finish others but his mind kept coming back to this.

he just wanted to get it right.

and it he realized he was at the point of needing feedback. so, that's what he found himself doing the moment another trainee sat down and got settled. "when you have a second, could you look at this for me?" suzu pointed to his notebook, he had some lyrics written out and two different versions of the next verse. "which one do you think i should go with it? i've been stuck on it for a while….when you have a second." direct but not too pushy, he had to remind himself of that at times. "it's been days but nothing is clicking."

[kenhd]

kentaro doesn't stop pacing (not yet) but his steps slow, heel dragging against the worn floorboard just slightly longer than before. there's a pause, like he's rewinding the last few seconds in his head, replaying avery's words over the buzz of his own thoughts. he glances over his shoulder. the glow from the hallway barely spills in, just enough to catch the outline of avery pulling on that hoodie like armor. kentaro exhales, half a laugh, dry at the edges.

"you sound like a dead poet society dropout," he mutters, not unkindly. "dreams suck, yeah. mine always end in fire or water." he rubs the back of his neck, fingers tangling briefly in his hair. "dunno' what that says about me. probably something weird and freudian." he finally stops walking. quiet, for once. the kind of silence that hums instead of screams.

"but if you're serious about the rooftop thing…" he turns fully, head tilted. "i'll take you up. literally. just don't quiz me on stars after tonight. i'm more of a cigarette break and existential spiral kinda guy." he grabs his jacket, half-zipped, moth-bitten, and nods toward the door, smirk faint but real this time. "come on. let's go chase gravity or whatever."

he shifted from where he was sitting, the darkness made it hard to see, but after a few moments, he could notice the way kentaro paced in their small room, back and forth, unsure if he had wanted to stop, or maybe doing so out of comfort, habit. his words are familiar, and avery felt the corner of his lips twitch up slightly before falling into a thin line. "i understand." his voice was soft once he finally spoke, standing up, he didn't reply right away, moving through the room to look for his hoodie, he slipped it on knowing quite well that it wouldn't be cold outside, but it would be cool, and if there was wind- it would be better to be warm than to catch a cold prematurely. "i try not to sleep as much as i can. i dream a lot. and i hate it. but i end up being tired, and sleeping anyways. and it is... exhausting." are the words avery share, moving to meet his roommate, and for a moment, time stood still, though the room felt quite stifling, maybe it was the probability of heading outside together that made it easier to breathe, "sometimes things don't make sense no matter how hard you try." a moment passed, and next, words soft, hesitant, "if you bring us someplace high enough like a roof top, i can name the constellations in the sky, and point out the planets in sight."

[kenhd]

𝒃𝒐𝒏 𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒕𝒊𝒕 —

𝒇𝒍𝒂𝒔𝒉𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 written for 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐝𝐚 𝐦𝐢𝐫𝐮 ( @hdmiru ) ♡

hydra café's way too fucking bright this early in the afternoon, but kentaro shows up anyway, dragging his feet in scuffed boots and sunglasses way too dramatic for someone indoors. he spots miru, and grins like he's just walked into her apartment uninvited, because emotionally, he totally has. she's been his big sister, it's only right. "miruuuu-chan," he sings, flopping into the seat across from her like he owns it. his rings clack against the glass table as he leans in, eyes scanning her face with all the subtlety of a raccoon in someone's trash. "did you miss me? no? rude. i missed me."

he snatches a piece of her pastry without asking, makes a face like it's not sweet enough, then shrugs and eats the whole thing anyway. he knows she'll scold him. that's half the fun. "anyway," he says, like this is a business meeting, "rate my outfit. be honest, but also be nice. i'm feeling emotionally fragile today and i have a meeting with a coach i'm not ready for."

[kenhd]

kentaro grins, sharp and slow, like something uncoiling. he's not drunk but the way she says his name like it tastes good in her mouth, like she's already decided he's dessert, makes his head feel dizzy anyway. barbie and ken. he caught that glint in her eye the second she thought it. they're perfectly imperfect, aren't they?

"entertaining?" he repeats, voice low, slurred just enough to sound deliberate. she's close, skin warm and glitter catching the strobe in tiny, sinful flashes. his hands hover for a beat before settling on her hips, lazy but sure, like he knows exactly what kind of night this is. "depends," he murmurs, tilting his head so his lips brush her temple. "what kind of show are you looking for?" he leans in too, lets his breath skim her jaw. he smells like amber cologne and cheap rum, his voice just rough enough to pass for mystery instead of mess.

"you want to see firework?" he doesn't wait for a yes. just takes her hand, fingers laced loose, and starts weaving them through the chaos. bodies press close, lights flash pink then blue then white, sweat and smoke cling to the air but he hopes she doesn't let go. up the stairs, past the broken exit sign and the bouncer too busy flirting with someone else to care, onto the roof where the city hums below and the music still bleeds up through the floor. there are people scattered everywhere, leaning against railings, swaying in circles, taking smoke breaks with their secrets spilling out. but he pulls her close again, hands on her waist, chin dipping to catch her gaze in the half-light. it’s loud and messy and alive all around them, but somehow (somehow) he makes it feel like none of that matters. like she’s the only one up here. "this better?" he asks, voice low, lips barely brushing her ear.

The bass thrums up through the soles of her feet with every bounce, and Barbie feels alive. Not as alive and he looks, though, with his tousled hair and sharp eyes. His shoulders are broad, and she pictures her hands on them. Kentaro. Barbie and Ken, how funny is that? It's like... fate. A man like that would turn anyone's head, even Barbie's—a head previously proclaimed to be desperately difficult to turn. But no one with any brains turns their nose up at a 5 Michelin star meal, and Kentaro looks utterly delectable.

She forgives the splashes of beer, since he's tall, and dark, and mysterious looking. "Only when I'm looking for something, or someone to entertain me," she replies with a half smirk, stepping closer and reaching up to lock her hands behind his neck, tugging him into an intimate dance. She can feel his body heat radiate off him, like he's a burning fire in the middle of a sauna.

Friends forgotten, she leans in, and tiptoes until her lips brush the shell of his ear. "Do you think you're entertaining, Kentaro?" Tonight had been fun, but it had been missing the thrill that comes with a handsome stranger to while away the hours with. One night of fun. A treat before life gets busy. She deserves it.

[kenhd]

by the time avery answer kentaro is on the floor, pacing, eyes darting around the dorm room like it's pressing in on him. the night's too quiet, too still. he's always hated that. he stops for a second, staring at the pale glow of the streetlight creeping through the blinds, jaw set tight.

he hears avery and he huffs out a breath, a small laugh that's more a sigh than anything else, scratching at the back of his neck. "me neither," he says, voice low and a little rough, like it's been bottled up too long. he crosses his arms over his chest, lets his head tip back against the wall.

"used to think if i stayed up long enough, something would… make sense, or whatever." he's not looking at avery, not yet, eyes fixed on the floor like he's searching for an answer in the cracks. he shifts, uneasy, like the words are too big for the room. "still waiting, i guess." he doesn't know why he's telling avery this. maybe because the night's too heavy to keep carrying it alone. maybe because it feels like they're both adrift. he shrugs, a small, tired motion. "wanna' take a stroll outside? i know a way we don't have to trip up the security system."

it was an odd feeling to share a room with someone he barely knew. avery was not used to sharing his space, not used to speaking to someone during the night, but now, he had to; he did not know how to be vulnerable, how to open up and share parts of him that he was too scared to, so he didn't. and that was how they had found each other in silence, staring at the wall, pretending they were both not feeling the most awkward, the most tense moment of their life. once again, avery was met with the feeling of quiet shame, and the earnest desire to run out into the night, no matter how terrifying it was. he breathed in softly, sharply when he heard feet against the cool flooring; so kentaro really was awake, just like him. it took a moment to fully understand the situation, and he felt his chest tighten just enough before loosening, slowly shifting in his bed before sitting up. a moment had passed, a few seconds, and then a minute, "i can't sleep either." the words come out softly, quietly, turning his attention to his roommate, his eyes meeting kentaro's before looking away, it would be easy to lie and say he was fine, but something about the night made him want to be more open, honest, for once, "sleep doesn't usually come easy to me, but i'll be okay. what about you?"

[kenhd]

𝒎𝒊𝒅𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍 —

written for 𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐞 ( @averyxhd ) ♡

kentaro can't sleep, the hall light seeping under the door like some ugly neon grin. he wonders if avery's already asleep or if he's lying there staring at the ceiling too, mind churning like his. their first night as roommates at hydra feels too heavy to breathe, the air thick with nerves and something else he can't name. he doesn't know much about the guy, they didn't have that 'roomie click'.

he drags himself out of bed, the floor cold under his feet, the smell of new sheets mixing with the faint, sharp tang of cheap deodorant and old sweat. he leans over the top bunk and whispers, voice hoarse and uncertain, "hey, you still up?"

his fingers drum restlessly against the bedframe, a soft beat in the dark. "weird night, you know? i don’t know. can't sleep." he pauses, half-expecting silence. "you good, avery?"

[kenhd]

𝒃𝒐𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒖𝒑 —

written for 𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐲 ( @barbiehd ) ♡

kentaro's fingers traces the rim of his plastic cup, lukewarm vodka-redbull sloshing at the bottom, half-forgotten. the bass thumps hard enough to rattle his ribs, but it's her laugh, wild and untamed—that slices through the chaos like a cigarette burn. she's dancing near the speaker, with her friends, one arm thrown in the air, eyes smudged with glitter and rebellion.

he wonders if she'ss even real. could she be real?

her name's barbie, she said it with a smile that could kill a priest. he repeats it like a mantra, barbie barbie barbie, hoping it sticks, hoping she sticks with him all night. he's not even sure what the hell he's doing here, half-sick on smoke and neon, but something about her makes him think he should try.

he inches closer, beer splashing his shoes, voice half-swallowed by the music. "you come here often, or just for the chaos?"

[kenhd]

hi again, i’m nic ₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ and introduce to you okamoto kentaro! kentaro has a profile to check out, more scribbles about him below, pinboard, bts content on twt @/edhwakeoleun! & lets chat on discord.

kentaro tends to keep a serious look on his face (even around friends).

he was captain of the swimming and volleyball team in high school. v leaderly.

he's a grouch in the morning. no exceptions.

his favorite type of music includes selection of alt, indie, garage, club tracks/artists.

his side of the dorms is littered with misc posters of bands/concerts, games, paintings, his medals, nailed stuffed animals, drumsticks, drawings, anything he can find and likes, really. messy as hell, too.

has a slight accent, struggles with korean mispronunciation at times.

not much of a talker, but an excellent listener.

he's cocky af once your muse gets to know him.

music is life.

he carries a book around so he can put it over his face to nap.

joining a local dance crew was the prelude to his interest in becoming an idol. he doesn't have classical training since he's mostly self-taught.

alt fashion boy; wears the same outfit a lot.

he drinks a lot of loose-leaf tea.

if he doesn't do his morning run routine, he becomes grouchier.

one year in, his impatient streak is back and he's ready for an official project.

recently, kentaro left legacy entertainment after being contacted by hydra labels to join one of their subsidiaries, YET ANOTHER shift in his journey, but he's determined to make it count this time.

he's learning to let go of old grudges and chasing that spark again: new team, new management, same restless fire.

he's started jotting down his own lyrics and melodies, hoping to bring his own voice into the mix.

even though he's got that serious look, he can't hide his grin when he's gaming with friends or blasting music through his cracked headphones.

✆ wishlist!

childhood friend for any born and/or raised in tokyo! would be totally insane to find someone from his district, but this is such a needed plot.

you caught him sleeping at a company lounge, common area, or local cafe one too many times so now his nickname is 'sleepy'.

any gaming center first-time or frequent goers? anyone? pls

lets go to an underground rave. or an abandoned warehouse concert, pick your poison. disclaimer: they'll ofc be present for curfew. maybe…

[kenhd]

cute ni-ki's three set hearts <333

[kenhd]

angels in america, tony kushner

[kenhd]