keter-class-dumbass

[keter-class-dumbass]

day 1 at the communal puzzle club: i see a puzzle with a sign next to it that says "please help with our communal puzzle" and i say to myself "don't mind if I do" and did the whole thing

[keter-class-dumbass]

God the prices of tvs have changed so much let me get my graph

[keter-class-dumbass]

why are so many canners so determined to get botulism 😭

"our great grandmas fed their entire families with their knowledge. they didn't need the government telling them how to do it."

great grandma also lost babies for want of vitamin k shots and antibiotics and would have had fewer babies to start with if she'd had the option to access birth control.

great grandma did the best with what she had and knew.

why can't we do the same 😭😭

edit after

@princessxombie an excellent point!

the reason for a preference of bottled lemon juice over fresh squeezed for canning (as reported through the Iowa State University Extension and Outreach): "It is a USDA recommendation that bottled lemon juice be used.  And consistent with the recommendation, reputable canning sources will agree that the best source of lemon juice for canning is commercially bottled lemon juice, as opposed to the juice of a fresh lemon. The reason for the recommendation is that bottled lemon juice has been uniformly acidified or standardized per FDA regulations: “lemon juice prepared from concentrate must have a titratable acidity content of not less than 4.5 percent, by weight, calculated as anhydrous citrus acid.” With a guaranteed pH...there is a consistent and known acid level which is essential for the critical safety margin in canning low-acid foods and for making jams gel properly. "

as for resources:

the usda guide to canning (revised in 2015). you used to be able to find it on the usda website but for SOME reason (two guesses as to why 🙄) that website is now routing to a broken error 404 page not found. fortunately, it's available other places! here it is hosted on the internet archive! if you want it printed in color and spiral-bound, you can also purchase it for $25 from perdue university.

if you want more resources, the university of utah has a whole section of their preserve the harvest extension website dedicated to safe food storage practices including freeze drying, fermenting, drying, etc.

ball (the mason jar company) also has a section of their website dedicated to canning 101, including the basic process, recipes, a glossary of terms, and videos for their tutorials if you're a visual learner. they also offer free online recipes broken down in a way that's meant to be easy even for new canners.

go forth and enjoy canning without giving yourself and others botulism, friends.

[keter-class-dumbass]

Technophobes need to apologise for "just put it in plain English you stupid machine!" because, well for one the decline in accurate error messages in favour of simplicity has contributed to the rise of tech illiteracy, but also because now whenever an "app" has a net connection error it will pop up a box saying something like "oo ooopsie! Your super duper feed went poo poo. We'll try again soon!" which having said to me by a corporation is about 8 million times worse than having to hear the word "network".

[keter-class-dumbass]

What gets me about the Mastercard/Visa shit is this:

You are at the grocery store. You pick up a nice, girthy zucchini. You head over to the oils and pick up a thing of olive oil. Then a packet of condoms.

Satisfied with your selections, you head to the cashier. As you place the items on the conveyor, a voice shouts: "DON'T SELL THOSE! THAT'S GOING UP A BUTT!"

And then for some reason, the cashier agrees. Then the guy who shouted, this fuckass guy in a suit, marches up to the counter and starts demanding that the store never sell any vegetables that could be put up a butt. He starts out pointing at the zucchinis and cucumbers and carrots, but you heard what he said: he's effectively banning every vegetable, just enforcing it selectively.

You ask the cashier if he's corporate or something. The cashier says no. The manager? No. He works here at least? No.

Who the fuck is he, then?

Well, the cashier explains, he's the bank manager from the next street over. He's taken up a moral crusade against vegetables that might go into rectums and if they don't obey him, he won't take anyone's paychecks or any money from any store that opposes him. And his bank is the only bank in the region, so it'd be a huge hassle for the business and the employees.

And somehow this dumb fucking scenario is real.

[keter-class-dumbass]

just like enamored by this interaction i had yesterday and again today with this old gay man…not to be like ‘oh what a feeling to see someone who has survived’ but literally that & today we actually ended up chatting and he asked me “are you family?” which i didn’t catch at all until he gave me an extremely knowing look (chin tilt, raised eyebrow. and he really just had such a shine about him, too) and i just got flooded with this big stupid feeling thinking about how much he has seen and known…about many things but esp lgbt community as it exists offline and historically & how if i were to ask, and were somehow able to know, there are 1000 different lifetimes in his, i’m sure. his name is leonardo

[keter-class-dumbass]

tiktoks with vine energy pt. 11

[keter-class-dumbass]

went to an elementaryschool musical production and they started the show with the director saying: "Now there's some very small viewers here today, so just so you know. There will be a scary character later in the show. This is her," and a girl in a kinda scary ghost outfit did a creepy walk across the stage, the stood up straight and did a cheery wave, "but remember, it's just Nina. She's pretending to be scary."

Aaaand i would very much like for horror movies to have that as a little bonus feature you can chose. Let me start a movie with Guillermo del Toro showing me a scary ghost that might jump at me, but don't worry, thats just Doug!

[keter-class-dumbass]

what the fuck

[keter-class-dumbass]

situation dire. i've been saying 'huzzah', 'alas', and 'tis unironically for like a year now. harmless so far.

however. i hath noticed i now mark half of my goodbyes with 'i must away'. it's spreading

[keter-class-dumbass]

sad reality of the fanfic-to-published work economy is that the weirdest people are willing to do it. that's why there's now hundreds of shitty no plot cishet hate-to-love enemies-to-lovers books that are ex reylo fanfic. and it's not even good. that's because the people who wrote book-quality steve/bucky and kirk/spock fic are too normal to think to themselves "i should get this porn published". they're too busy working in local government offices

[keter-class-dumbass]

[keter-class-dumbass]

Me

[keter-class-dumbass]

you’ll never believe what I am choosing to start reading now, for the first time ever, in the year of 2K25

[keter-class-dumbass]

I loved this era of Steven universe discourse

[keter-class-dumbass]

ksdhgfjsdkhgaklsdjfh

[keter-class-dumbass]

You will come to Chicago prime and you will like it