kireijae - Tumblr blog

[kireijae]

what in the name of all things hello kitty is this shit

[kireijae]

i've been putting off posting this just bc i've not been in the right headspace for it but i'm going to stop hyuck's hotline. i've had some things happen in the last year that've made me quite uncomfortable doing it at all and honestly since not many people are sending things in it's just not worth it. i'm sorry to the few of you who still send things, it's been fun.

i've obviously voiced my frustration with my writing here before, this is also me saying i'll be putting even less effort into it now. it's officially just for me when i have something i can't get out my head and it needs to go somewhere. i'll still tag them but putting effort into something just for it to get some likes and then die really hurts. especially when writing used to be so fun for me and people used to tell me they enjoyed my writing too. i guess i'm just not as good as i thought i was and that's okay, but it's time to give up fully. and that's okay too.

[kireijae]

confused! - ldh

a/n: i listened to pado and this is what came of it

warnings: minors who read this will be skinned. not full on smut but close enough. some angst but smutty fluff ending

—

you felt haechan get up beside you, pulling his warmth with him. you were laid in your bed, snuggled up in haechan's t-shirt from the night- or hours- before.

he had a schedule soon, you weren't quite sure what time it was, but you could hear him quietly ticking off his mental to-do list.

"okay, 15 minutes. i should shower," he mumbled, something he always did when he was rushing to work.

you heard the water turn on, and nearly fell asleep again to the rhythmic sound of it falling to the floor.

"yeah, mark, i'm at her place right now."

you weren't sure how long you'd slept for, most likely around 10 minutes, because haechan could still be heard, though he was outside your bedroom door now.

"i'd tell you some of the details later but we won't have time to talk by ourselves much right?" you mentally rolled your eyes. of course he would tell mark about your first night being (somewhat) intimate. you were taking it slow, so anything happening was exciting for the both of you. you didn't really blame him, you'd definitely call your best friend as soon as the sun came up and fill her in on your night.

"dude..." haechan trailed off into a sigh. "she had me confused."

'confused'? the words hit you like a block of ice. what had you done wrong? why didn't he say anything?

"yeah! i tried to look down and see what she was doing so i could get her to slow down or something– no, she wasn't looking at me! her eyes were closed! and she was moaning like crazy!"

your body chilled further, but your cheeks heated up to a searing temperature, the embarrassment flooding your senses. why had he not stopped you anyway if it was that bad?

"yeah, so i had to just hold on and pray, man," haechan laughed.

you felt tears spring to your eyes and your face grew hot. blood rushed through your ears and you didn't hear anything haechan said until he opened the door to your room.

"yeah, i'm on my way out now. see you," he whispered, grabbing something from on top of your dresser.

you heard him shuffle over to you and felt his lips press into your hair. you were glad for the lingering darkness, as it hid your saddened features from your boyfriend.

–

haechan texted you at 5pm asking if he could come over after his schedules and you begrudgingly agreed. he'd whined when you'd attempted to wiggle your way out of seeing him, so you submitted. it would be a good opportunity to talk about what you heard that morning.

you'd been awake enough at the time to know it wasn't just a bad dream, though you'd tried to convince yourself it had been while you ate breakfast.

you psyched yourself up to see him again. tried to get yourself a little script to recite to him when he got there, but when he was right in front of you, holding his exhaustion in his eyes and a to-go bag from your favourite restaurant, you felt all the conviction you had earlier leave you in a matter of seconds.

so, there you were watching the office with haechan curled around you on the couch. he was gently caressing your upper arm with his left hand.

"did you have a good day, baby?" he asked, turning his attention from the show to you.

you guessed then was your chance, "umh, no not really." and as soon as you said it, he bolted up, sitting cross legged to your left, holding your hand.

"what's wrong?" he asked, sparkling eyes digging into yours to find an answer. "tell me, baby."

you sighed, obviously your conviction was once again swiped away by the boy before you. why was he so sweet? and why was he so stupid?

he sat there, waiting for your answer patiently.

"i heard you this morning," you finally let out, "on the phone."

his brows furrowed under his dark fringe, "did i wake you up?"

you looked down and shook your head, too embarrassed to look at him.

"i just wish you'd have spoken to me first instead of telling mark," you nearly whispered, anxiety pushing your voice higher than it usually was.

"oh," he said in the midst of his realisation, "i'm so sorry, angel, i won't talk about our sex lives with anyone if you don't want me to. i should've made sure you were okay with it first, huh?"

he rubbed your arm, but you shook it off. "i don't mean that," you still didn't have the courage to look at him. you took a long pause before speaking, the lump in your throat evident in your voice, "i mean you should tell me if you don't like something i'm doing. i want to make you feel good, and i can't do that if you don't tell me if i'm doing something wrong. you know it was my first time doing anything like that."

haechan's features were back to holding his confusion, "what do you mean? i loved every second of it. and i wouldn't have told mark otherwise."

you scoffed, "donghyuck, i heard you tell him that you wanted to slow me down and that i confused you. you–"

"that's what you thought i meant?" he burst out.

"what else could that mean, donghyuck?" your eyelids dropped slightly, nonplussed.

"it means you were so good i couldn't think straight," he said, pushing his face closer to yours as if close proximity would get the point across easier.

"what?" you still didn't believe him, "then why'd you try to slow me down? and what about the holding on and praying or whatever?"

he got closer to you again, his demeanour changing slightly– a lustful aura overtaking him. "because you were so good i was gonna cum down your throat after 30 seconds, only god could help me then."

you gave him the best unimpressed look you could, what with him smirking at you the way he was. you didn't want to get your hopes up, he had to be kidding. "you lasted pretty long, hyuck."

"i'll say. 3 minutes feels like forever when you're trying not to cum the whole time," he countered, "and you know i'm not usually that fast."

he had you there. although you hadn't gone much further than make-out sessions with hyuck, you had experimented a little. you'd cum on haechan's lap a few times and each time he'd get two orgasms out of you before he'd even thought to reach into his sweats and finish himself off. and even then he'd make you ride his thigh for a while longer before he came.

"that wasn't the real thing though," you argued.

"you think i don't know what i'm doing baby?" he asked slyly as he pulled your legs over his thighs.

you shook your head teasingly. another lie. haechan was known for having plenty of experience and particularly for having insane stamina. it was one of the things that intimidated you about him when you'd first met. who would want to date a virgin when he had his pick of any girl he wanted?

it was likely your insecurities around your inexperience that led to you perceiving his words the way you did, but that was a thought for a later time.

"i guess i'll have to prove myself then, huh, baby?" he barely got the whole sentence out before he was kissing you, roughly, and pushing you back down on the sofa.

the heat in your cheeks you felt that morning was no match for the burning sensation his lips left behind as he trailed down your jaw to your neck. he nibbled and sucked on your pulse point to pull specks of red, blue and purple to the surface of your skin.

"you drive me crazy, you know that?" he commented, probably spurred on by the small sighs falling from your mouth.

"you were already crazy when i met you," you giggled, looking down at him through his fringe.

he bit you a little harder at that, and when you squealed, he laughed heartily.

hyuck continued to kiss your neck, eventually moving down to your collarbones and then looking up to you expectantly with his hands pulling at the hem of your shirt.

"can i take this off?"

a small nod, and your shirt was gone a second later. replaced by warm hands and soft lips, anywhere they could reach.

"i'm gonna eat you out, okay sweetness?" he spoke as he slid his hand along the inside of your thigh. "i'll show you what it's like to feel so good you can't think."

you smiled at him and nodded, all embarrassment and doubt already wizzing right out of your head at the nickname paired with the thought of what was to come. pun intended.

[kireijae]

Hi hyuck!

Me? Do the obeying? Hmph okay fine 😠 but I won’t be easy, okay? You probably know that by now and you can’t do anything about it

To Fae:

If anyone I ever say sounds like a pick me, it’s because I find it funny I promise I’m nOT A PICK ME

-🎀

hyuck: yes, you. you're gonna be good for me right? i mean, you usually are, after some coercion.

fae: WHAT NO IVE NEVER THOUGHT THAT-

[kireijae]

Bro I’m seeing outtakes of the nct Documentary and I’m sobbing. Haechan said he always wanted to be a father and show his child what fatherly love is because he was sent away from by his own father to go live with just his mother in Jaju and I can’t

-🎀

ugh i think i'll sob if i watch it. nct just makes me so emotional sometimes so it's hard to interact with any content. i just get too happy!!!!!! but this might ruin my life methinks

[kireijae]

hyuckie, you'll have to tell me what we're doing! i need to dress appropriately>:( - 🪽

hyuck: well, baby, i'll keep the important parts a secret, but we'll be staying in. i'll cook, but i'm not saying what. so dress for me, angel. i'm thinking a cute, short dress...

[kireijae]

Hi hyuck!

I wouldn’t say masochistic, hyucckieee. It’s just fun messing with you hehe. You do it to me so it’s only fair that I get to do it back :D

To Fae- oh I’m so glad you’re doing better now!! Take good care of yourself and drink lots of water <3

-🎀

hyuck: hmmm i think it's more fun when we work together, no? how about i do the talking and you do the obeying?

fae: thank you love! and thank you for checking up on me!

[kireijae]

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMjestr8S/

Need a hyuck NOW UGH like bro me whEN

-🎀

i want him to drag me around everywhere and cuddle me and be my personal chair and ugh sir please just one night

[kireijae]

hi hyuckie, why do i have to think of it:( surprise me won't you? - 🪽

hyuck: okay baby i will, i'll pick you up at 7. dress pretty.

[kireijae]

Hi hyuck!

Oh—

I mean…I’d definitely like that..but the question is do I want to give you what you want or no? Cause well…come on, I’ve never been that easy heh

To Fae- girl it’s okay everyone loves a dirty hyuck 🤭🤭 ALSO I was meaning to ask how you’re doing and how you’re feeling now

-🎀

hyuck: well, you've said you'd like it. so why shouldn't you give it to me? feeling masochistic?

fae: i got sick AGAIN but i'm fully better now, gave myself a few days off just to make sure!

[kireijae]

hello hi sorry i was busy for a few days i'm back i have not abandoned you i shall be back shortly!

[kireijae]

Hi hyuck!

I’m kidding I’m kidding. You’re the cutest little bean alive. Everything you do is cute and nothing you do with ever change that. Happy?

I mean…I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss your annoying ass heheh. Ugh you’re adorable I just wanna eat you up

To Fae- girl you’re so real for that. Haechan>>>

-🎀

hyuck: happy? not really, no. i miss you too much. maybe you should come over. like right now. so i can be the one to eat you up.

fae: omf idk if you wanted haechan to get dirty but he did it anyways oopie

[kireijae]

Hi hyuck!

Because you’re so cute?…okay hyuck, whatever you say..

I’m glad your day was good! My day was alright. Didn’t really do much so it was a pretty relaxing day. So much peace and quiet when you aren’t around, ya know? Hehe

To Fae-

Bro should be grinding on you, not your gears. But NO he has been hitting so different oh my god absolutely feral for that man

-🎀

hyuck: what, you don't think i'm cute? that makes me sad angel~

i'm glad you had a relaxing day, but i really missed you today. i had no one to annoy all day!!!

fae: that's what i'm saying!!!

ever since i watched his vlog i nearly pass out when i see him like just knowing a bit more of what he's like really got to me

[kireijae]

hi hyuckie

you were very sweet last night and it did make me wanna tell you all my secrets, but i won't. not yet~

to fae: hopefully you do!

🪽

hyuck: not yet hm? say, angel, then why don't you tell me what else i can do~ i'd love to have all your secrets

[kireijae]

Hi hyuck!

Hi baby! Thank you for last night you’re so sweet and cute uGH. After you left, my period ended as well…what kind of magician are you 🤨

Anyways, how was your day today? I hope it wasn’t that stressful?

To Fae- I’m done with these men ugh I CANT. The sheer audacity I just—no that’s it, scREW THEM bye

-🎀

hyuck: i'm a you-magician, my magical abilities mean i can make you feel better just because i'm so cute.

my day was good baby, busy, but good! how was yours now that you're feeling a bit better?

fae: i swear i'm going to end up in a psych ward bc of them. especially hyuck lately he's been grinding on my last brain cells

[kireijae]

okay i'll do the hyuck's hotline texts soon, i just wanted to ask if you guys have any suggestions on how i could make it better? i feel like there are a few things, but i'm not sure about themmmm

[kireijae]

eehheeee i'm having fun w theseeee