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This Is The End

From familial trauma to mind games, you never know quite what will lead to the end. During the autumn of 2017, the team behind writerly nonprofit organization @ch1con mentored two talented young writers through the publishing process, giving them a head start on becoming the successful authors of tomorrow. Now, you can read the stories on which these up-and-coming writers have worked, along with four by the Chapter One Events mentors themselves. Each of these stories leads to a startling conclusion. Are you ready for the end? 

As one of the two young authors that was mentored by the Ch1Events team, I’d like to give a huge shoutout to all my mentors! Thank you all so, so much! 

I went through many lessons, such as formatting my story, what the querying process was like, and what everything in a contract meant. I didn’t realize how much I didn’t know! There is so much that goes on behind the scenes of a book, so it was amazing to understand, and be a part of, that process!

Now, moving on to the anthology itself, it’s available to purchase through the following link:

http://www.blurb.com/books/8302743-this-is-the-end

My contribution to the anthology was a short horror story. It’s based off of the painting Nighthawks, if anyone is familiar with it.

I’ll include an excerpt of it below:

“Wendy studied the man. He looked familiar, almost like she’d seen him before. The two sipped at their Coke, their glasses emptying further with every break in conversation.

So engrossed in their own discussion, Wendy and Aidan did not even notice the other man sitting across the counter. He wore a hat that shadowed his face, making it impossible to make out any of his features. His dark, pin-straight suit implied wealth, but his labour-worn, calloused hands did not.

The two only looked up when a deep, violent cough broke out of the man, pulling the other three people’s eyes to him. He took out a light handkerchief, coughing into it. When he pulled it away, there was a dark stain on it. Blood.

The man looked up, his gaze meeting with Wendy’s. It was in that moment that she realized that no human could have those eyes.

Then the voice came back. The voice that she thought she'd never hear again.

She looked over to Aidan, trying to urge him to notice the man. To feel the anxiety that had settled inside her lungs, making it harder and harder for her to breathe. He eyed the man across the counter, and knew he was what inspired the change in Wendy’s attitude.

"Let’s get out of here." Aidan whispered, his eyes communicating enough to Wendy. Sliding on her coat, Wendy grabbed her purse, obviously as afraid as he was. Aidan nodded grimly at the bartender, starting towards the door.

Wendy just left, disregarding any manners she had. She strutted out, the voice clawing at the back of her brain, urging her to walk faster, to run, to break free. But her head was telling her otherwise. The voice had no control over logic. She knew this. The voice had always been there, always taunting her, driving her to the edge. As she walked down the street, Wendy wondered if she’d reached it.

Aidan struggled to keep up. He never knew that those long legs could walk so fast. Where was she getting this energy from? Moments ago, she was yawning. Now, she was speeding back down 5th, heading towards the water. In all of this fluster, he forgot to look behind him.

The man was following them. Not obviously, though. He was kicking a rock, acting like a small child walking home from school. The key to following someone was to act like you weren’t. No one could catch him this way. He was untouchable.”

If this excerpt enticed you, you can finish the story by purchasing the anthology! http://www.blurb.com/books/8302743-this-is-the-end

There are so many other great stories in the anthology, and all of them lead to an end. If you’d like to find out how they get there, I highly recommend you buy the anthology!

You can keep up with Ch1Events by using the following links!

Website: 

https://chapteroneconference.org/

Twitter: 

https://twitter.com/Ch1Con

Tumblr: 

@ch1con

Instagram: 

https://www.instagram.com/ch1con/?hl=en

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/ChapterOneConference/

If you do decide to get the anthology, I really hope you enjoy it! Are you read for the end?

- Joey

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Las Meninas by Diego Velázquez // “Bravado” by Lorde

Requested by ladymarionmacbeth!

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Vanity by Auguste Toulmouche // “Magnets” by Disclosure ft. Lorde

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//Taylor Swift - Getaway car

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halsey. the hopeless fountain kingdom tour. chicago, illinois. november 19, 2017. @iamhalseymusic

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but not to hold

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My Love Letter to Lorde and her Melodrama

Dear Ella,

I waited four years for Melodrama. Even when I didn’t know it would called Melodrama, or that it would be what it is, I think I’ve been waiting my whole life for this album. I think I’ve always needed this album. I have never heard an album that encapsulated my feelings so well: heartbreak, but obsession; freedom, but heaviness.

The way Green Light opens immediately pulled me in, feeling the intensity and raw heartbreak you put into the vocals in the first thirty seconds or so of the song. You created a song that taught me that it was ok to feel this way, but you can’t let it be all that you are. Sober haunts me in the best way possible. It follows me around, whispering its chilling pre-chorus and catchy beginning and end in my ear constantly. I feel the way you do. It’s easy to ignore pain while you are lost in a dance. So that’s what I do when I hear this song: dance. I let go of my emotions for three minutes and seventeen seconds, and wait until I have to sit down to address them once more.

Homemade Dynamite is a party anthem, a song of strength and immortality. Only you could sing things like “You know I think you’re awesome, right?” and make me feel something in it. It reminds me of how I feel while dancing with my best friends: infinite.  The Louvre is the love I fear: a frustrating obsession with someone. But now I realize that is how I've felt before. I had feelings for someone, and they came upon me so quickly. I saw them as a friend one day, and the next they were so much more.

I had to wait a few days before I wrote about Liability. I had to gather my thoughts, sort out what I wanted to say. That’s how much this song means to me. You perfectly encapsulated the desire to be more to someone, to become involved with them, but to at the same time know that you were too much for them. I feel this way everyday. I feel it in the way people begin to pull away, the way people react to my actions. You’re right. “Get you wild, make you leave.” I’m fun for a moment, for a short amount of time. Then I become too much, and they run away.

Hard Feelings, to me, is like flipping through a scrapbook. A collection of lovely, tender moments that you’d never want to forget. But as a love becomes more and more complicated, you have to begin to let go of those moments, or they’ll eat you alive. The way two pairs of eyes lock or how they brush past me stay with me, but I’m beginning to forget those feelings. They were tearing me apart. It was time to let go of that endless summer afternoon. Loveless is the turning point in my eyes. You let go of your love, and you feel ready to screw someone up. Screw someone up, the way they did to you. Even after I’ve let go of them, I can’t help but continue to exist for them. Stupid emotions, or hard feelings.

Sober II is raw and tragic. The strings send a chill down my spine, feeling the loss and heartbreak that echoed through your heart. Writer in the Dark is superbly heartbreaking. It’s so strong, you’re so strong, but at the same time you have to remember when you were strong so you can continue to be. As an amazing analyzation of love, I can see how I would react in your situation. I would get angry, but fall apart, and learn to exist without them. And I would be my dramatic self, and write something heartbreaking about them, as that would be my coping mechanism. I think that the writing part is on its way. I’m still working through the other steps.

Supercut is so happy and full of life. The lyrics speak to my head and heart. I want to believe that I can still be with them, but I realized while listening to this song that I remember things in their greatest form. My mind censors and cancels out anything that stains a memory with sadness and disappointment. So when I’m reaching for my happiest moments, I’m not getting the real flurry of emotions I felt. I’ve since begun to sort through my memories, and see which make me truly happy. Liability (Reprise) filled every empty hole I was left with after Liability. Up until this point, I had myself entirely convinced that I was a problem. That I was too much, an annoyance, an embarrassment. Since hearing this song, I’ve tried to see myself in a better light. “You’re not what you think you are.” The perfect counter to the chilling truth to Liability. It also warms my heart that you were able to heal and recuperate after the pain you felt during the time you wrote Liability. And so I’ve taken my inspiration from you, and begun the healing process.

Perfect Places opened my eyes. I kept trying to change the walls around me, to create a “perfect place.” But I’ve found that that really is not possible. Our world is how it is, and it will never be perfect, but I can leave the positive mark I hope to.

I just want to thank you. For changing me as a listener, writer, and mostly, person. You are my biggest inspiration, and I hope that someday I can also write music that touches the hearts of so many.

Melodrama is about letting go, living life to the fullest, and moving on. So this is goodbye. To all the pain, all the heartbreak. I’m done with that. I’m ready to live. Truly. Melodrama Forever.

Joey

@kissednkilled

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Lorde- Melodrama Aesthetics-Part 1

ARIES-Homemade Dynamite

TAURUS-Hard Feelings

GEMINI-Sober

CANCER-Liability

LEO-The Louvre

VIRGO-Supercut

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We told you this was m e l o d r a m a

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three years, loved you every single day, made me weak, it was real for me, yup, real for me

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hard feelings by lorde

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lorde // perfect places

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pisces yooooo

The Signs As Songs off of Melodrama

Melodrama by Lorde (Scorpio Sun, Virgo Moon, Capricorn Rising)

Aries: Supercut I’m someone you maybe might love I’ll be your quiet afternoon crush Be your violent overnight rush Make you crazy over my touch

But it’s just a supercut of us

Taurus: Writer In The Dark  I am my mother’s child, I’ll love you ‘til my breathing stops  I’ll love you 'til you call the cops on me  But in our darkest hours, I stumbled on a secret power  I’ll find a way to be without you, babe 

Gemini: Homemade Dynamite A couple rebel top gun pilots Flying with nowhere to be Don’t know you super well But I think that you might be the same as me Behave abnormally Let’s let things come out of the woodwork I’ll give you my best side, tell you all my best lies Yeah, awesome right?

Cancer: Hard Feelings  These are what they call hard feelings of love  When the sweet words and fevers all leave us right here in the cold  Alone with the hard feelings of love  God I wish I believed ya when you told me this was my home 

Leo: The Louvre  Our thing progresses  I call and you come through  Blow all my friendships  To sit in hell with you  But we’re the greatest  They’ll hang us in the Louvre  Down the back, but who cares—still the Louvre 

Virgo: Liability  So I guess I’ll go home into the arms of the girl that I love The only love I haven’t screwed up She’s so hard to please but she’s a forest fire I do my best to meet her demands, play at romance We slow dance in the living room, but all that a stranger would see Is one girl swaying alone, stroking her cheek

Libra: Sober II (Melodrama)  Know you won’t remember in the morning when  I speak my mind  Lights are on and they’ve gone home, but who am I?  Oh, how fast the evening passes, cleaning up  The champagne glasses 

We told you this was melodrama 

Scorpio: Green Light  Well those rumors, they have big teeth  Hope they bite you  Thought you said that you would always be in love  But you’re not in love no more  Did it frighten you  How we kissed when we danced on the light up floor? 

Sagittarius: Perfect Places  Are you lost enough?  Have another drink, get lost in us  This is how we get notorious, oh  'Cause I don’t know  If they keep tellin’ me where to go  I’ll blow my brains out to the radio, oh 

Capricorn: Liability (Reprise)  All of the dreams that get harder  All of the things that I offer you  And all of the shit that we harbor  Make all of the kids in the choirs sing woo-hoo Maybe all this is the party

Aquarius: Loveless  Bet you wanna rip my heart out  Bet you wanna skip my calls now  Well guess what? I like that  ‘Cause I’m gonna mess your life up  Gonna wanna tape my mouth shut  Look out, lovers 

We’re L.O.V.E.L.E.S.S  Generation 

Pisces: Sober  Ain’t a pill that could touch our rush  But what will we do when we’re sober?  When you dream with a fever  Bet you wish you could touch our rush  But what will we do when we’re sober? 

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//Halsey - 100 letters

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La La Land (2016)