kiszka-jake

[kiszka-jake]

Chapter 5: Road Not Taken

Katie’s POV- October 2023

I opened the closet doors in my childhood bedroom and pushed through the hangers of things I left behind. I found the shirt I was searching for and pulled it off the hanger. A black T-shirt I cropped with the original Greta logo. I slipped it over my head and studied myself in the mirror.It fits a little tighter now, but the outfit is cute. Black ankle boots, black boyfriend jeans and my faded Jean jacket. Considering I didn’t pack my suitcase with concert attire, I was doing alright. 

I picked my phone up to look at Jake’s text again. One hour and thirty seven minutes. Why am I driving that far to see him again? I’m playing a game that I know I can’t win. I can’t be with him,but seeing him one more time can’t be so bad. I think it’ll be the closure I need to know I made the right choice. I’m leaving in a couple days and he’s going to continue touring the world and forgetting about me. A day as friends isn’t a bad note to end on. 

••••••••••••••

I shoved the parking garage ticket into my jacket pocket and felt my phone buzz in the other. A picture of Lyla from my mom. She was smiling on a tire swing with my dad next to her. A day at the pumpkin patch with her favorite people. They were all too happy to spend the day with her while they think I’m hanging out with Grace. I don’t know why I lied to them. It was just less complicated.

I stepped out of the parking garage and looked up at the huge arena with the sign announcing the show is sold out. As I crossed the street, I saw a line of people waiting outside the doors with chairs and blankets. I felt their stares as I passed them and headed to the front towards the box office. 

“Excuse me” a girls voice said from behind me. 

I paused and looked back at her to see she was staring at me.

“This is the front of the line.” She said to me with a hint of attitude. I gave her a small smile and pointed to the box office. “I’m just heading up there.” She relaxed and smiled back at me.

“I hope you can get a ticket. Theyre sold out, but maybe they released a few more.” She took a bag out her friend’s hand and held it out towards me, “Do you want a bracelet?”  

I walked over to them and stared into the bag. It was filled with hundreds of colorful bracelets with the boys names and song titles.

“These are so cute, I didn’t know it was a thing.” She studied my face and I felt a wave of anxiety come over me. Is she an old fan that recognizes me? She looked me up and down and pulled a bracelet out of the bag. 

“Here. Your outfit is really giving me Jake lane vibes.” I relaxed and let her place the purple bracelet in my hand. I slid the bracelet onto my wrist and thanked her as I headed down towards the box office. 

•••••••••••

I could hear Josh half heartedly singing the words to Black Smoke Rising when I walked into the empty arena. I wove my way through the seats that were set up on the floor and locked eyes with Josh who started waving enthusiastically. 

“You came!” He yelled into the microphone. 

His words bounced around the empty space as Jake snapped his head up from tuning his guitar. A slow smile spread across his face while his looked me up and down as I walked up to the stage. 

“Long drive?” Jake asked while he looked down at me from the stage with the same smile still plastered on his face. 

“Not too bad,” I replied as I turned my head to the side and twisted my face like I was in deep thought, “it was only an hour and thirty seven minutes.” 

He bit his lip and his smile turned into a smirk that was meant just for me. He slung his guitar over his shoulder and lowered himself down to sit on the edge of the stage in front of me. His brothers were exchanging glances, probably trying to figure out what exactly was going on between us. 

The lingering anxiety I have around him started pulsing through my body again. His denim button down was half done and the same tangle of necklaces rested against his exposed chest just inches away. I slowly turned around to take in the size of the venue and avoid his stare. 

I could hear the thump of his boots hitting the stage as he swung his feet back and forth. He was the epitome of calm and collected while I was the complete opposite. 

“Lyla didn’t want to come?” He asked.

I looked at the empty seats that would be filled in a few hours while mentally begging my heart rate to slow down. It’s just Jake. I’m just here to hang out with him and see him play again. I forced a smile on my face as I slowly turned back towards him to answer. 

“She’s a really big Zeppelin fan, so I don’t think she would like you guys.” 

His threw his head back as he let out a laugh that mixed in with the rest of the guys. My heart rate started to return to a normal rhythm and my forced smile turned real. The perceived awkwardness melted away and I felt myself slipping back in time like we were still in their parent’s garage and not the biggest arena in the city. 

“That was a good one.” Daniel said into his microphone at the back of the stage. He got up from his drum kit and leaned over the edge of the stage to give me a hug. Sam waved at me from the other side of the stage before he started playing some chords on the piano. 

Thump. Thump. 

Jake’s legs were still swinging as his brothers started to get back to their rehearsal. 

“We’ll be done in like 15 minutes and then we can hang out.” He said to me as the thumping abruptly stopped and he pushed himself back up. He hesitated like he wanted to reach out and give me a hug too, but settled on a soft smile as he swung his guitar back around to start playing again. 

Jake’s POV- October 2023

“And this is where all the food is.” I said as we passed by the open doorway backstage. She nodded her head and kept her pace even with mine. 

We reached my dressing room, and she hesitated for a second before walking inside and looking around. She walked over to the clothing rack where someone had hung my show outfit.

“This is insanely cool, Jake.” She said while running her hands across the beaded embroidery of the jacket. She walked across the room and sank into the leather couch against the wall. “I guess you guys are too famous for the thrift store finds now.” It was said as a joke, but her green eyes looked proud. 

I sat on the other end of the couch and let the silence linger in the air. If she came all the way here, my words last night must’ve meant something to her. 

“You look good in that shirt.” I said as I stared at my logo that was stretched across her chest. 

She tugged on the edge of it and shook her head. “It’s kind of tight on me now, but I thought it was appropriate for the occasion.” She pulled her jacket around the front of her body like was she was trying to cover it up. Did she think I was making fun of her? She showed up here, but it still feels like we’re walking on a tightrope and I’m constantly at risk of falling off. 

“I meant it. You look hot.” 

“You don’t have to lie and be nice to keep me here you know.” She spoke quickly like she wanted to get the words out before she changed her mind. 

I tilted my head at her and gave her a confused look. 

“Katie, when I saw you at my parent’s house, I thought you were even hotter than you were the last time I saw you.”

She shifted on the couch and cleared her throat while running a hand through her perfectly curled hair. “So do you guys still like to open with Safari Song or what?” She asked the question without acknowledging my previous statement. A hint to move past it. 

I tried to stifle the laugh forming in my throat, but it slipped out anyway. She sat up straighter and glared at me.

“Well, we’ve released three albums since that song came out.” I said to her. Her face softened as she fell back into the couch. 

“Oh. Right.” She said it quietly in a tone I couldn’t read. Was she surprised that we had that many albums? Disappointed?

“You really never looked us up?” 

She just shook her head no in response. 

Damn. All the songs I wrote for her. The songs I hoped she heard. The ones that held all the words I couldn’t say to her.  

“Half the songs on our first album were ones I wrote for you,” I looked at her while I said it and watched the emotions play across her face. “The guys knew everything I said on that album was meant for you to hear, but there’s this song on there called The New Day that only you would really get.” 

Her jaw twitched and she played with the ends of her long brown hair. A nervous habit she’s had since we were kids. 

“Play it.” She said it quickly and quietly like she wasn’t sure of herself, but I pulled my phone out anyway and connected it to the speaker that was always in my dressing room. I searched the song on Spotify and avoided looking at her while the song played. 

I stared straight ahead for three minutes and forty nine seconds. We were left sitting in silence until I cleared my throat and glanced over at her. She jumped off the couch and walked over to the tissue box sitting on the table across the room.

“I get it.” Her back was to me and all I could see were her hands resting on the tissue box. She turned around to look at me with a tear stained face and more threatening to spill out of her eyes. She walked back over and sat close enough for our knees to brush. 

“Your dreams are not forgotten.” She was absentmindedly pulling apart the tissue in her hand while she said the words I wrote back to me. I waited so long for her to hear this song, and I can’t even come up with anything to say back to her.

She turned her head to meet my eyes and her hair cascaded around her face. I saw every version of her when she looked at me. I saw her face when we were 7 and I kissed her on the playground for the first time. I saw her face when we were 15 and promised each other forever. I saw her face at 21 when I broke her heart. 

“That’s what you said to me that night.” Her eyes formed a question like she was asking me if she had permission to go back to that day. She took a deep breath and started again. “That’s what you said to me that night after the abortion. You said I couldn’t forget about my dreams.” 

I watched more tears silently fall from her eyes as I bit my cheek to keep my own in. “And you told me that love we felt for our baby wouldn’t leave us even when they were gone.” I said it while her knee bumped against mine and she nodded her head at the memory. 

“Guess I should’ve made you a co-writer.” I forced my lips into a small smile and she let out a laugh mixed in with a sob. 

“It’s a beautiful song.”

I mouthed a thank you to her compliment while she shoved her tissue scraps into her jacket pocket. 

She took a shaky breath and slipped her hand over mine on the couch. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize you were hurting back then. I was busy with school and I just thought you were just changing and becoming a rockstar. I didn’t know.” 

She gently placed her other hand on my cheek and turned my face towards hers while she continued speaking. 

“I’m not sorry for the choice we made and I know  you’re not either. We were two kids that had no business raising a child together.” The tears I had managed to hold back were threatening to come out. 

“I need you to know I’m sorry for what I said that night at Harvard,” My words were met with a kind smile that I didn’t deserve. “You’re right. We did make the best decision at the time. I don’t know why I was mad that you didn’t know my feelings when I never told you.”

She let go of my hand and leaned back on the couch.“I always wondered that. Why did it start to bother you and why didn’t you tell me?” She was looking at me desperately like she had been wanting to know my answer for years. 

I sighed and looked up at the ceiling. “A couple months before that fight, we were playing a show and there was this little girl in the front row that was just absolutely loving it. For some reason she reminded me of you and then all of these feelings that I didn’t even know I had just hit me. I couldn’t stop thinking about her being our daughter and how that could’ve been our life. I started to drink more and distance myself from you to cope I guess.” I turned my head to the side to watch her take in my words. 

She gave me a tight lipped smile and wiped her eyes again. “I really wish you would’ve told me all of that a long time ago.” She said with a sigh. 

I sat up and leaned in close enough to smell her perfume. It smelled like the same one I picked out for her 21st birthday. I reached out to wipe a tear off her cheek and push her hair out of her eyes. 

“I wish I would’ve said it too, but it’s not too late for a second chance.” 

I didn’t give her a chance to reply as I leaned in slowly and put my lips to hers. She kissed me back and slid down on the couch while pushing her legs under me. I was on top of her now and it was like muscle memory. My hand was under her shirt going for her bra just how she always liked it. Her eyes shot open and she gently pushed me away. 

My heart was still racing as I sat back on the couch and started to apologize. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” 

She sat up with her hand pressed to her lips like she could still feel me. “No, it’s okay we just can’t be together like that anymore. It’s too complicated.” 

I felt a tinge of annoyance at her making excuses, but tried to not let it show on my face. “It’s cool.” I said to her with a smile. 

I stood up and walked over to the clothing rack and started to undress. I felt her eyes on my naked back as I took off my shirt and slid the jacket on. I glanced back and she quickly turned away as I slipped off my jeans and put on the matching pants. 

I turned around to face her with a smile on my face. I was desperate to save the rest of the day and not ruin everything we just built. She looked relived that I was willing to pretend everything that just happened, hadn’t actually occurred. She walked over to the mirror on the wall and frowned. “I guess I kinda ruined my makeup.” She said as she tried to wipe off her remaining eyeliner.

I walked over to the door and held it open. “No worries, we can go fix it.” 

She raised an eyebrow at me and gave me a questioning look as she walked through the doorway. 

I walked out after her and grabbed her hand to lead her further down the hall. “Not only do I have a fancy outfit, but we also partake in a little makeup now too.” 

Katie’s POV- October 2023 

I gripped the overpriced beer I just bought in my right hand as I pulled the ticket Jake gave me out of the pocket. 

Section 106. Row 1. Seat 1.

I left the flow of people lead me towards my section as their excited chatter carried through the air. I reached my section to find every seat, but mine filled. I slid my phone out of my pocket and took a picture of the packed arena.

I clicked on Jake’s name in my texts and attached the picture. 

Sorry to be the one to let you know, but it looks like nobody wanted to come 

The bubbles appeared on the screen immediately. 

I only care about one person in the audience tonight

I was smiling at my phone like an idiot when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I quickly turned my phone away and met the eyes of the smiling girl next to me.

She stuck her phone out to me and raised her voice to be heard over the pre-show music. “Do you mind taking a picture of us?” She asked me while pointing at herself and her friend. 

I took the phone from her as they stood up and started to pose in front of our seats. They had on silver dresses that sparkled in the light, and rainbow face gems that looked identical to the ones I just watched Josh put on. They smiled and hugged each other as I took the pictures with the stage in the background. 

I handed her the phone as we slid back into our seats. “You guys look beautiful,” I said to them as I motioned towards their outfits. “I had no idea people got dressed up like that for this concert.” 

Her face lit up at my compliment and she immediately wrapped her arms around me and hugged me like we were best friends. “Thank you so much! Greta fans are the nicest people ever.”

I reached for my drink and took a sip as The Black Keys song suddenly stopped and was replaced with orchestra music blaring from the speakers. The girl next to me started shrieking and looked over at me. 

I shrugged my shoulders and gave her a questioning look. 

“Oh my god is this your first show?” She asked as she grabbed my arm and gave me the most intense look I’ve ever had from a stranger. 

I was still holding the beer as she tightened her grip on my arm. “Um yeah, I haven’t heard any of their new albums. Just the ep.” 

Her smile filled her entire face and her eyes got even wider. “You’re going to have so much fun.” 

The lights went out and she gasped and let go of my arm. The arena filled with screams as the pace of the music picked up. The curtain fell and revealed the four of them on the stage taking in the crowd as the screams got even louder. They looked at each other and Jake crouched down and started playing the opening chords to one of their songs. 

They all walked to their designated spots on the stage while everyone sang along and screamed for them. I can’t believe they went from tiny bars to something like this. They have fire and catwalks like Jake always dreamed of. 

Jake. He was effortlessly playing and smiling at the girls in the front row holding up signs with his name. My mind wandered to us backstage when he was on top of me with his lips on mine. 

The song ended and he looked over at my section and locked eyes with me. He gave me a smirk and headed down the catwalk while he started playing the next song. Fuck he was hot.

The girl next to me grabbed my arm and started yelling in my ear over Josh’s singing. “Oh my god did you see that he totally was looking at us.” She was absolutely thrilled over the idea of being noticed by him. Everyone here wanted a second of his attention and he’s willing to give it all to me. 

How different life would be if he would’ve said all of this the last time we saw each other. He apologized for the night we broke up, but he still doesn’t remember our last night together. Our real last conversation. I felt the anxiety entering my body again. I stood up from my seat and headed for the lobby. I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding while I leaned against the cold concrete wall in the deserted corridor. 

I slid my phone out and hit the name of the one person that will understand. 

“What’s up? Why does it sound like you’re standing outside of a club? Did you go clubbing without me?” Grace unleashed her stream of consciousness before I could even say hello. 

“It’s not the club, it’s the Greta Van Fleet concert.” I rocked back and forth in my boots unsure of what her response would be.

Silence. That’s weird for her. 

“Gracie?”

“I’m sorry what events could I possibly have missed in the last 24 hours that would lead to you being at Jake’s show?” 

I sighed and filled her in on his late night confession at my parent’s house and our backstage kiss. 

“I fucking knew you guys couldn’t stay away from each other.” She was squealing and sounded like she was jumping up and down. 

“What’s the point of being excited when nothing can happen?” I said to her sadly. 

“Katie, you’re always so caught up in doing the right thing. All you do is go to work and take care of Lyla. You’re the best mom I know, but you need to do something for yourself too.” 

My heart was still racing as I took in her words and I slid down the concrete wall to sit on the dirty floor. 

“Yeah, but doing something for myself can’t be hooking up with my kids dad” 

She paused before responding to me. “Why not?” She sounded a little angry. 

“What do you mean why not? I’ve felt sick all day hanging out with him when he doesn’t even know the truth.” 

“Jake met Lyla, knows her birthday, and has been aware of her existence for years. He’s never once thought to ask you if she’s his kid so that means he has no idea.” She said it all slowly like I was too dumb to understand her words. 

I pulled my legs up to my chest and sat in silence. 

She sighed into the phone and started talking again. “I’m saying you need to see him again tonight and allow yourself a couple hours of fun and freedom. Don’t worry about Lyla. Whatever you guys do today doesn’t need to involve her.”

“Maybe you’re right.” I said quietly to her.

She laughed a little and I knew she was probably lying on her bed rolling her eyes at me. “Trust me, I know I’m right. I also know you think he’s incredibly hot and you haven’t gotten laid in forever.” 

I started laughing with her and felt less anxious. “He’s probably used to hooking up with gorgeous models now though.” I said to her as I looked down at my outfit that now feels incredibly lame and not sexy. 

“So? He kissed you. You have incredible tits, a nice ass and you don’t look like you’ve ever given birth. Go get him. Maybe use protection this time though.” 

••••••••••

I pulled the backstage pass out of my pocket and showed it to the security guard at the door before wandering down the deserted hallway towards the side stage. The show had to be almost over and I wanted to be waiting for him before I lost my nerve. 

When I made it back to my seat after talking to Grace, the rest of the songs were all a blur and all I could focus on were the looks he kept giving me and the memory of his lips on mine. 

The screaming intensified as the music ended and they gave one last wave before heading down the steps to leave the stage. Jake passed his guitar off and looked up to see waiting for him. 

“I thought you left already.” He said with a big smile on his face. The same smile as Lyla. I thought of what Grace said and tried not to think about that.

“I couldn’t leave without saying goodbye to you.” 

He kept the smile on his face as I closed the gap between us and he slipped his arm around my waist. 

“Sorry, I’m a little sweaty.” He whispered in my ear. I looked over his shoulder and saw Sam and Josh exchanging glances while they watched us. 

I ignored his comment and wrapped my arms around his neck so we were face to face. The last thing I saw before I closed my eyes and leaned in to kiss him, was the big smile that never wavered. 

tag list: @fleetingjake @sammysstolenbirks @hollyco

@freyjalw @fasttrainblues

[kiszka-jake]

Chapter 4: Road Not Taken

Chapter 4

Katie’s POV- November 2017

“Slow down, why are we running?” Jake slurred. I stopped in the middle of the deserted campus and spun around to face him.

“God, you don’t even see what you’ve turned into,” I felt the tears welling up in my eyes as he just stood there staring at me, “The old you would’ve hugged me and tried to make me feel better. You wouldn’t insult my friends, make a fool of yourself and flirt with other girls in front of me.” 

He didn’t respond to me but took out a cigarette and lit it. He closed his eyes and blew the smoke up to the dark night sky before he answered me. 

“Maybe you’re the one who’s changed. I’m doing what I always wanted to do and you can’t even be happy for me.” 

“I’ve done nothing but support you. I go to your shows, I let your fans be mean to me and never say anything. I let you forget about me for days on end.” I tried to slow my breathing as I watched him take in what I said. 

He started laughing quietly and got louder as he spun around on the walkway. He shook his head and let out one last laugh before facing me. 

“Do you hear yourself? I didn’t insult your friends tonight, but they’re all douche bags that think they’re better than me because they go to Harvard. I just toured Europe, and released an EP that people love. And our fans would never be mean to you,” He ended with an eye roll and a look of disbelief that I would even say that. “They always ask me about you. They’re just jealous.” 

The tears were rolling freely down my face as I answered, “So I have to be okay with mean comments to my face? And rude messages? I mean yeah who wouldn’t be jealous of me? I have a drunk boyfriend that ignores me.” 

His beautiful face was contorted into anger. He shook his head like he couldn’t believe the words I was saying. “You could’ve been with me this whole time. We could be living this dream together. As a family.” His face hardened when he said the last sentence and his eyes locked onto mine.

I stood frozen in place as the wind whipped my hair all around. “Is that what this is about? You’re still holding onto that decision we made in high school? Don’t forget we made it together.” I tried to say it with conviction even though my heart felt like it was going to physically break. 

He matched my silence for a moment before answering. “You were the one who wanted to get an abortion. How could I tell you I didn’t want that?”

My knees buckled with the weight of his words. There it was. The thing we avoided. The thing we never discuss anymore. “I think you’re really drunk and saying things you don’t mean right now.” I turned to keep walking back to my dorm, but his hand reached out to stop me.

“Why do you think I drink all the time? Maybe I’m trying to forget my biggest regret in life. I can’t talk to anyone about it because you made me swear I wouldn’t tell. I didn’t even tell Josh because that’s what you wanted, but you’ve never brought it up again. You just wanted to come to this school so bad, but I could’ve taken care of us. I have a record deal, but I should have a family too. You took that away from us.” I could hear the pain he was trying to hide in his voice. The pain I didn’t even know he still had. 

I wrapped my arms around myself and tried to blink back the tears clouding my vision. “Why would we still talk about it? We were seventeen, and I thought we moved on. If this is the reason you’ve been like this, you could’ve talked to me.” I whispered. 

He looked at me with pity and kept the distance between us. “How could you not realize it was hurting me again? You didn’t notice how it hurts me every time someone brings their little kid to our shows? You think I’m fucking heartless like you apparently are?” His words were laced with a venom that was meant to poison our love. 

I started backing up down the sidewalk,”I think we should just talk about this tomorrow morning when you’re sober.” I spat out between sobs. 

He didn’t even care that his words were like a knife to my chest. He just stood there staring at me with that stupid cigarette in his mouth. My tears didn’t impact him at all. 

He cocked his head to the side and opened his mouth to twist the knife more.”What’s the point?” 

I stayed silent and let him continue. 

“We can’t change the past. We’ve just been trying to outrun it this whole time.” 

He paused for a moment like he was going to take it all back and apologize. His face flashed back to the kind boy I used to know. But then he opened his mouth to break my heart for the final time. 

“We’re done.” 

I felt my sadness being replaced by a rush of anger as he turned to walk away. My voice came out loud as I yelled after him, ”You really think we could’ve raised a baby on a tour bus? You wouldn’t have any of this. We’d be stuck in Michigan with nothing.” 

He turned back around to face me and looked at me like he pitied me. “It would’ve been fine. We would’ve made it work.” 

I rolled my eyes at his flippant response. Of course he would say that. He thinks everything can work out now just because people adore him and he has help for everything. 

“So what you mean is it would’ve been okay for me to give up my dreams, but you wouldn’t have given up yours.” I said it with all the anger I had left in me, “Didn’t you say you were happy for me when I got in here?” I waved my hand around to gesture at the campus. 

He nodded his head and eyed all the buildings surrounding us. He dropped his cigarette on the cobblestone and shoved his hands in his coat pockets before answering me. “And you believed me? You’re pretty stupid for being so smart.” 

He gave me once last glance before turning around and walking away. 

Katie’s POV- October 2023

It’s only 8pm and Lyla was already asleep after wearing herself out at her birthday party. I pulled the blankets over her and quietly slipped off the bed when I heard a tap against the window. I paused in the doorway and heard the noise again. I walked to the window, pulled the blinds back and saw Jake standing in the backyard with a fistful of pebbles he grabbed from my dad’s garden. 

“What the fuck?” I silently mouthed at him. He threw the pebbles in the grass and gestured for me to come down. He can’t take the hint to leave me alone. I hurried downstairs, grabbed my dad’s sweatshirt hanging by the screen door and  stepped onto the back porch. He was in the same outfit from earlier with no jacket on to protect him from the cold night air blowing around us. He was leaning over the railing with his back to me, and he didn’t even turn around to acknowledge my presence. 

“My parents are out to dinner with my aunt. You could’ve just knocked on the door.” I said to his back while shifting my weight around to stay warm. 

He ignored my statement and kept looking out at the yard when he finally spoke in a flat and even tone like he had rehearsed what he wanted to say. 

“Six minutes and thirty two seconds.” 

I turned his words over in my head to try to make sense of them. He pushed off the railing and turned around to look at me. The glow of the moon highlighted the beautiful angles of his face. 

“That’s how long it takes to drive from my house to yours. I started counting the seconds in kindergarten when we had our first play date. I knew no matter what happened that I could be here in six minutes and thirty two seconds.” He reached his hand into his shirt pocket and pulled out a joint. He stood on my porch and lit it while I took in his words. 

He exhaled a cloud of smoke and continued,“Then you moved to Boston and I was still here, but it was okay,” his voice cracked and he took a beat to stare at the moon, “because I knew I could get a flight and be there in an hour and fifty four minutes.” He turned to lock eyes with me and walked a step closer while I stayed firmly planted. 

“Then I started to leave here and you were still there. But that was okay too because every time I got to a different city, I would find the fastest flight to Boston and know I could still get to you.”

He sighed and took another long drag from his joint. He threw it on the porch and rubbed his boot on it to put it out. He walked down the steps to stand in the grass and look up at the stars.

I felt the weight of all of his words sinking in. The small ways he thought about me that I had no idea about. I started to open my mouth to respond when he started talking again. His voice was filled with more desperation and panic now like he needed to get everything out. 

“Then we had that stupid fight and I had too much pride to chase after you and apologize. I was 21 and I thought I was a rockstar. I thought I didn’t need you,” I saw the pain from that night so long ago resurfacing on his face. It all comes back to that night for us, “I still have the last text I ever sent you on my phone. I don’t think about it everyday anymore, but in the back of my mind I still know it’s there.”

He pulled his phone out and scrolled all the way down and flipped it around to show me. He still had the phone facing me when he began reciting it. 

“It’s midnight here in California. We play Coachella this week and I wish you were with me. You’re only 8 hours and 23 minutes away if you catch the next flight. I hope you’re thinking of me too.” He slid the phone back in his pocket and stared at me with glistening eyes. 

“And I waited for you to see it. I figured you were asleep, but then it was the morning and you still didn’t answer. I think I knew then that I had lost you forever.” He turned away from me and ran his hands through his long hair. 

I walked down the steps to stand next to him in the grass. “I never got that text.” I whispered to him, “I blocked your number because I was making myself sick hoping you’d call me after that night. I had to block you to move on.” 

He chuckled to himself and smiled kindly at me. “I should’ve figured that out.” He said. The moon was shining down on a us like a spotlight as we stood awkwardly together with the past still between us. He turned suddenly and reached a hand out towards my face. He brushed a piece of hair out of my eyes and let his hand linger. 

“I came to say all of that because I had to get it out. It’s been in me for 5 years and I needed to let it go in case I never see you again.” He dropped his hand and searched my face for an answer, “I can’t change what I said back then, but I’d really like to try and show you how sorry I am. Five bad minutes and I ruined everything” He said it all with a hint of sadness like he knew it wouldn’t be enough for me. 

I needed to hear his words just as much as he needed to say them. I wanted to fall into his arms and scream out how much I forgave him for everything. I would do it, if there wasn’t a secret between us. A secret that he doesn’t even know is between us from a night he doesn’t remember. 

“Mommy?” Her small voice broke through my thoughts and I turned to see Lyla standing on the porch with Jake’s stuffed dog in her hands again.”You left me.” She said it with a frown and a glance at Jake. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to. Go back inside and I’ll tuck you in again.” I called to her from my spot in the grass. She rubbed her tired eyes and yawned as she went back inside. I watched until her shadow faded before I looked back at Jake. 

I put a hand on his chest and let my fingers slide over to his exposed skin. “I have a lot to say, but you know it’s complicated and I have to go.” He put his hand over mine as I finished my sentence. 

“My offer for tomorrow still stands. Please come.” He stepped closer to me and leaned in like he was going to kiss me. He gently placed his lips on my cheek and let it linger for a second. He pulled away and slowly dropped my hand as he walked back to the front of the house. 

I was frozen in the same spot until I heard his jeep pulling out of the driveway. I went back inside to find Lyla already back asleep with Mr.Scruffy cradled in her arms. My phone vibrated on my nightstand and I looked down to see a new text from an unknown number. 

Got a new number last year, so don’t block this one too. I’m heading to Detroit now. You’ll only be an hour and thirty seven minute drive away. 

••••••••••

Sorry this one is a little shorter! It was needed to unlock another piece of their puzzle. I really love this one, hope you like!!

tag list: @fleetingjake @sammysstolenbirks @hollyco

[kiszka-jake]

Road Not Taken: Chapter 3

Jake’s POV- October 2023

I tightened my grip on the steering wheel and shifted my eyes to glance at Katie in the passenger seat. She had her window down and the crisp fall air was blowing her hair around. She was squinting in the sun with a small smile on her face. I wonder if she was thinking of all the times we drove around like this. She felt my eyes on her and looked over at me with her smile still in place. 

“I can’t believe you invited yourself to lunch, and convinced me to ride with you.” 

I felt the buzz I always used to get around her slowly creeping back in as I responded, “I just figured you probably missed hanging out with me.”

She shook her head and turned to look out the window at all the places we grew up going to. Every time I’ve been back to this town in the last 5 years, I’ve thought of her. There’s not one place we didn’t go to or have a memory in. Her ghost is always waiting for me around every corner. Part of the reason I avoid coming back here. 

I cleared my throat and hesitated before I spoke up again, “You know, I got the idea for that line in Flower Power on one of our car rides like this.” She kept looking out the window and ignored me,“The star shines in her eyes line.” I stammered. 

I saw the pink flush she always hated creeping up her cheeks. 

“I always liked that line” she mumbled while avoiding my gaze. We pulled into the parking lot and she quickly hopped out of the car to avoid any more conversation with me. I sat silently in the restaurant and enjoyed the familiar presence of the four of us again. She has a genuine and natural way of interacting with my brothers that I’ve never been able to replicate with any other girl. I can never tell who’s just using me and sometimes I’m okay with that. Other times, it leaves me longing for something real. 

“We should order the stuffed mushrooms to start. Weren’t those always your favorite?” Sam asked Katie. 

She scrunched her freckled nose and shook her head. “I wish. I used to love them, but I haven’t been able to stomach them since I got sick after having them when I was pregnant.” 

Josh and Sam already moved on from her comment and were back to flipping through the menu. I couldn’t move past it. 

“How did you decide to keep it?” I asked her.

Her head shot up from her menu as she looked at me with a confused look. 

“Lyla. How did you decide you wanted to keep her.”

Josh kicked me under the table, but I ignored him.

“Hey, listen you don’t have to answer him. He shouldn’t have asked that.” Josh interjected while glaring at me. 

She waved her hand to brush him off and locked eyes with me. 

“It’s okay. I guess we don’t really know each other anymore,so it’s normal to have questions.” Her fingers traced the edge of her menu while she kept her eyes on mine, “I don’t really know honestly. It just felt right.” 

I blinked to get a moment of relief from her piercing green eyes that could always tell what I was thinking. 

“Even though you knew you’d have to do it alone?” 

“Yes. I knew I could do it.” Her face was hard and her voice steady. 

We stared at each other in silence as I took in her words. I knew I shouldn’t say my next thought, but it came tumbling out of my mouth before I could stop it.

“Well, it seems like a dumb decision since you didn’t graduate from Harvard. That was your dream. That’s all you cared about.” 

Josh kicked me even harder under the table as her eyes started to well up with tears. She fought them off as she answered me.

“I’ve never regretted Lyla for one second. She’s amazing and special in so many ways that you’ll never understand.” She said it quickly while pushing her chair back from the table and walked quickly to the restroom. 

I watched her go until the door closed, and turned to find Josh and Sam both staring at me with stunned expressions. 

“Are you trying to make her hate you again? I think it’s working.” Sam said with an eye roll as he flagged down our waiter. 

Katie’s POV- October 2023

My hands were gripping the edge of the porcelain sink as I stared at myself in the dirty  mirror. I don’t know why I thought I could handle hanging out with Jake again. Or any of them. It was insane to think I could talk freely about our daughter with him. Our daughter. She’s his too. My fingers wrapped around the sink even tighter at the thought. Sam and Josh are her uncles. They’re the family I know she longs for even if she cant articulate it yet. 

I pulled my phone out and stared at the Lock Screen. It’s a selfie she took of us at the park last week. I looked at her perfect heart shaped face and saw the entire Kiszka family in it. Her big smile that looks just like Jake’s. Her perfectly pink lips that look just like Josh’s. Her brown eyes that are shaped exactly like Sam’s. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I stared at the picture. She’s half me too. Everything she knows is what I taught her. Her loud and wild spirit, her kindness. It all comes from me. 

I slid the phone back in my pocket and took one last look in the mirror while giving myself a fake smile. I walked back to the table with the tiniest amount of pride left and immediately started talking to Josh about his life to change the subject. He was waving his hands around and happily explaining to me how they play arenas now and people come from all over to see them. I was nodding along to his story, but my eyes still slid over to look at Jake. 

He had his hand on Josh’s shoulder and was agreeing with whatever he said. He was even more beautiful than he used to be. His hair was just a little longer, his jaw a little more angular. Josh said something that suddenly made him burst out laughing and flash his signature smile with all his teeth showing. I felt my breath catch as I pictured Lyla again. 

They spent the rest of the lunch telling me stories of all their adventures and accomplishments. Every story left me with a sense of awe that the boys I grew up with could do all of that. When it was time to go, Jake finally spoke to me again.

“Do you want me to take you back to your parents?” His tone was cautious and filled with a hint of apology for what he said earlier. We didn’t need to discuss it again. We can just add it to the list of things we’re both sorry for. 

I glanced at Josh and Sam who were walking just a little bit ahead of us on the cracked parking lot pavement. He followed my gaze and spoke again. “Or you can ride with them.” 

I wanted to tell him no and run after his brothers, but my brain couldn’t catch up with my mouth. 

“No, you can take me.”

He smiled a little to himself as we walked to his black Jeep. He turned the radio up on our favorite rock station and I felt myself relax as he curved around the backroads. If I closed my eyes, I could almost pretend we were still high schoolers and not two adults running from our past. 

He pulled up in front of my house to my dad  kicking around a soccer ball with Lyla. I grabbed the door handle to jump out and say my final goodbye to him for the next ten years, but suddenly he was opening his door too.

“Uh what are you doing.” I asked.

He smirked at me and continued to get out of the car. 

“Well, you ignored me yesterday so I didn’t get to really hang out with the miniature version of you.” 

I could feel my heart beating faster as I hurried around to the front of the jeep to intercept him. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this possibility when I agreed to the ride. 

“It’s okay really. You don’t have to pretend to be interested in my life still.” 

I think I almost had him convinced, but my dad chose that exact moment to wave and yell his name. 

He smiled and waved back and excitedly slammed his door. He walked closer to me and grabbed my hand to drag me along. 

“Well, I can’t ignore your dad.” He said with an incredulous tone. 

Jake’s POV- October 2023

I can’t believe I just grabbed her hand. My pulse is racing, but it’s like no time has passed at all. Her hand naturally relaxed in mine as she lagged a couple steps behind me. Lyla was bouncing up and down and ran over to her when we got closer. She dropped my hand to scoop her up in a hug. Why am I disappointed that she dropped my hand? 

“You gave me the doggy.” Lyla said in that squeaky voice all little kids have. 

I shoved my hands in my pockets to erase the empty feeling they had. 

“Yep, I sure did.” 

She wiggled out of Katie’s arms and came to stand in front of me. She really did look just like Katie up close. They have the same heart shaped face,same brown hair with golden flecks in the sun. The only indication that someone else was involved in creating her is her brown eyes. She put her hand on her hips and looked up at me just like Katie used to when I annoyed her. 

“How do you know my mommy?” 

I bent down to her level and stuck out of my hand. 

“I’m Jake. I’m your mommy’s friend. We met when we were your age.” 

She giggled and grabbed my hand, but quickly frowned at the roughness. 

“I play a lot of guitar.” I said as an explanation.

Her tiny face broke out in a huge smile as she whipped her brown curls around to face Katie. 

“Maybe he knows my daddy!” She shouted while bouncing on the tips of her pink converse. 

She whipped back around to face me, “Mommy always says my daddy is going to teach me how to play guitar.” 

I smiled at her and glanced up at Katie. “Wow, you just replaced me with another musician?” 

Her cheeks had their familiar pink flush as she stuck her hand out towards Lyla. Lyla slipped her hand into hers as they started to walk up towards the two story brick house. Lyla turned to wave at me as Katie finally spoke. “Hes a better player than you.” 

Damn, it’s still hot when she fucks with me. 

I watched them walk inside, oblivious to the fact that her dad was still there. 

“I’m glad you guys are hanging out again,” He said as he clamped his hand on my shoulder. 

I felt myself tense up on reflex like I was still in high school and he was giving me the curfew.

“It’s more like I forced myself into hanging out with her.” I replied as I slipped my sunglasses back on and reached into my pocket for the car keys. I raised my hand in a mock salute and turned towards the jeep when he interjected.

“I hate to ask this…” 

I paused and turned back around the face him. He looked a little embarrassed and I got a sick satisfaction out of having something he seemingly wants. 

“Lyla, really wants to know how to play guitar.” He shrugged his shoulders and sighed when he said it. “We still have one of your old guitars in the basement. I was thinking maybe you could show her a couple things.” 

A slow smile broke out across my face as I realized this would get me more time with Katie. I would never say no to him, but maybe I can get a little more information to use to my advantage first.

“Her dad doesn’t want to teach her?” I posed the question and studied his face for the answer. His face flashed with disappointment and a hint of anger. 

“She’s never met her dad.” He replied. “Katie said they just had a class together and in the end he didn’t want a baby.” 

“Yeah that’s what Kate told us, but I figured he had at least met her.” I said. 

He shook his head and gave me a sad look. 

I shoved the car keys back in my jeans pocket and started walking up the grass to the house. 

“I never really liked any of those Harvard douche bags anyways.” I said with a smirk as I passed him.

I felt a piece of the same anger that he had. Katie was my girlfriend for years, but she was my best friend first. She didn’t deserve to be treated like shit and I feel like I have the right to be defensive on her behalf still. She would probably disagree and say she can take care of herself. 

I turned the door knob and entered the familiar living room. The bright white walls, the faded green couch, the dark wood floors. The sound of my boots were muffled by the worn rug as I rounded the corner to the basement steps. I made my way down and turned the light on to illuminate our old hang out spot. Everything looked frozen in time and my old guitar was still on the stand in the corner. 

I wrapped my hand around the neck and headed back upstairs. I could hear Katie’s laugh coming from her bedroom. Why does being back in her house and hearing her laugh fill me with anxiety? I can play to 20,000 people and be less nervous. I tightened my grip on the guitar and felt myself relax a little. 

They were on the floor playing with Barbie’s when I entered the doorway. Lyla looked up from her half dressed doll and smiled while Katie gave me a confused look. Her gaze stopped on the guitar on my hand as she opened her mouth.

“Uh did you come to give us a private concert…?” She asked.

I ignored her question as my eyes wandered the room. The same purple walls and matching bedspread. The first Greta Van Fleet poster Josh ever drew was still taped on her closet door next to pictures of us at the lake. The memories of us growing up together are all immortalized in this room. 

I cleared my throat and looked back at her on the floor where she was waiting for my response.  Odds of her telling me to leave were pretty high, so I decided to hedge my bets and talk to Lyla. She can’t tell me to leave once she’s excited. 

“Your grandpa told me you wanted to learn guitar.” I said to her as I slid down on the floor next to them. Her face immediately lit up and she started squealing in excitement.

I chuckled a little as I took in her response.”I guess that would be a yes.” I said as I started tuning the guitar. Katie gave me a disapproving look. I raised my hands in mock surrender and she sighed and busied herself the dolls scattered on the floor. 

“Alright,” I said as I finished tuning. “This is a little big for you, but you can still learn the basics.” I flipped the guitar around and placed it on Lyla’s lap. Her face peered over the top as she tried to unsuccessfully wrap her fingers around the neck. 

Her brown eyes were staring at me and I saw the question forming before she opened her mouth.

“How do I know you can play guitar?” She asked with a concerned look on her face. 

Katie tried to stifle a laugh as I looked at her with a stunned expression. I took the guitar back from Lyla and started absentmindedly strumming chords. 

“I didn’t know 4 year olds spoke in fully formed sentences.” I said to Katie. 

“I’m almost 5.” Lyla quickly said with a hint of attitude. 

“She started talking on her 1st birthday and hasn’t stopped since.” Katie replied as she tugged on one of Lyla’s curls and looked at her proudly. Lyla nodded along in agreement and said “My teacher always tells me I’m smart.”

I shook my head and smiled at her as I kept strumming the guitar. Playing makes me relaxed and seeing Katie with Lyla is somehow making me want her more. “That makes sense considering your mom is a genius.” I said while locking eyes with Katie. She flashed me a polite smile and leaned back against the bed behind her. 

“To answer your question,” I began again as I looked back at Lyla,” I learned to play guitar when I was your age and I’m in a band.” I jerked my chin towards to poster on the wall. “That band actually.” She whipped her head around to look at the poster and then back at me. She shrugged her shoulders and seemed to be satisfied with my answer. 

I placed the guitar back on her lap and placed her glitter painted fingers on the frets. “So now you just take your other hand and go like this.” I said as I ran her hand down the strings. She beamed at Katie as the sound of the chord filled the room. 

“I did it mommy!” She exclaimed as she strummed up and down again. I sat back and took in her excitement. I glanced over at Katie to see she had her phone out recording her. I leaned back into the frame and faced the camera, “And that was the Jake Kiszka guitar tutorial.” I said as I pointed at the camera.

Katie let out a laugh as she lowered the phone. The first real laugh I’d earned from her in years. Lyla was busy plucking different strings when Katie scooted over and put her arm around my neck in a half hug. 

“Thank you.” She said quietly as she pulled back from me and started playing with Lyla. My body was still tingling from her touch as I watched the flush creeping up her cheeks. 

“Mommy?” Lyla suddenly said ending our moment. “Can Jake come to my birthday party tomorrow?” 

Katie seemed to snap back to her reality of hating me as she struggled to find an excuse. 

I pushed up off the grey carpet and turned to head towards the door.

“I have to leave to go to see some family now, but tomorrow I’m all yours.” I said. Lyla smiled happily and jumped up to hug me. I patted the top of her head, not really sure how to interact with kids. “It’s a date.” I said with a wink to Katie as I backed out her room towards the steps. 

Katie’s POV- October 2023

“Okay Lyla, we’re ready for the reveal!” Grace yelled into the hallway. I could hear Lyla’s giggle as she started to push the door open.

“Tada!” She yelled as she threw her arms up and posed. My mom took her shopping and let her pick out a special birthday outfit. She twirled around in a pink glittery dress, rainbow glitter converse and a princess tiara. 

I knelt down and pulled her into a hug and rocked her back and forth. “You look absolutely beautiful, Ly,” I pulled back and held her out at arms length. “You definitely look like a five year old now.” 

She was giddy with the thought of the cake and presents that would be coming her way today. She gave me her big smile as she started to turn away. “I’m gonna go show grandpa!” She yelled as she ran down the steps. 

“That was such a Josh way to pose.” Grace said as she flipped back on my childhood bed. I laid next to her and we stared at the ceiling in silence. 

“God, they’re all in every part of her.” I whispered  to Grace as I watched the ceiling fan spin. Her long blonde hair splayed out around her as she turned her head to look at me. 

“And every part of you raised her.” She said as she reached for my hand to squeeze it. 

•••••••••••••

Lyla skipped ahead through the glass doors and we were sucked into the commotion of the bowling alley. I had my fifth birthday party here, so it was fitting for Lyla to do the same. She was being greeted by all of family members that came to celebrate her when he walked in. 

He smiled and waved at me as he made his way over to our lane. He was dressed way too cool for a 5th birthday party in Michigan. He had on dark jeans, a navy button down that was only half done, scuffed black boots, an excessive amount of necklaces and dark sunglasses that probably made it look like it was midnight inside. 

“This is definitely the best party I’ve been to all year.” He said when he reached me. 

I sank down into one the plastic chairs and rolled my eyes in response. “Yes, I’m sure all the Hollywood parties are very lame.” I said. 

He pulled out the chair next to me and looked around at the other tables filled with my family members. If any of them noticed his presence, they didn’t acknowledge it. It actually seemed like they were actively avoiding coming over to us. Probably my dad stopping everyone so we could talk. He couldn’t stop going on about how great Jake is last night. 

“I hate LA,” He said while pulling an envelope out of his pocket, “and this is for Lyla.” 

I took the envelope out of his hand and lifted the flap to look inside. It contained a glittery princess birthday card and $500. 

I looked at him with a stunned expression, but couldn’t read his with the sunglasses still on.

“Ok, first of all you need to take off the sunglasses. We’re in Frakenmuth.” I said with a hint of disbelief. 

A smile was playing on his perfect lips as he reached up to remove them and shove them in his shirt pocket. “So what’s the second thing?” He asked.

I held up the card as an explanation. He blinked and started speaking slowly. 

“Does she not like princesses? I just assumed…” he said as his voice trailed off. 

I rolled my eyes at his attempt to play dumb. “Who gives a five year old five hundred dollars, Jake?” 

A laugh escaped his lips as he took the card back from me and opened it. He grabbed 4 of the bills and handed it back to me with one left inside.

“I figured I’d give her a hundred bucks for every year, but you can just give her this then.” He said as an explanation. 

I can’t tell if he’s trying to show off how rich he is now or if he’s just that oblivious. He fiddled with the bracelet on his wrist and I watched the muscles in his hand twitch as we sat in silence. Lyla was rolling a bowling bowl down the lane with my grandpa when he spoke up.

“Listen, I really just came here to ask you to come to our show tomorrow,” his jaw was tense and he was looking at me intently to study my reaction to his words, “it’s in Detroit. I have to rehearse in the morning, but we can hang out tomorrow before the show.”

I immediately start shaking my head no and opened my mouth to reject him. “Jake. We can’t“

He had a pleading look on his face as he cut me off, “Please don’t say no. The guys miss you, and it would be fun.” 

I shook my head again and looked over at Lyla to avoid his gaze. “We can’t just hang out and pretend again. I’m sorry Jake.”

I felt his hand on my arm and I shifted my eyes to look at his beautiful face that was practically begging me to say yes. 

“Are you waiting for me to say sorry still? If I do that, will you come?” His question came out as a whisper that I barely heard above the noise of pins falling.

I moved my arm over so his fingers fell to the table. “I think you should just go. Thank you for the card. I’ll tell Lyla you said bye.” I said it quickly to get it all out before I changed my mind. He tapped his ring on the metal table and scooted the chair back. I kept my eyes forward, but still felt him standing over me. He paused for a moment a like he was going to say something else before he finally turned and walked away. 

••••••

Chapter 4 goes CRAZY. Trust.

tag: @fleetingjake @hollyco @sammysstolenbirks

[kiszka-jake]

Chapter 2: Road Not Taken

Katie’s POV- Age 16

Jake leaned over and turned the radio up. “This is my favorite Oasis song, you’ll love it.” I leaned back against the headrest of his Jeep and watched him tap his hand on the steering wheel as he sang along. “Heyyyy Lyla. The stars about to fall so what do you sayyyy, Lyla?” 

I love moments like this when it’s just us and he’s not afraid to sing. He’s just as good as Josh, but he would never get on a stage and do it. He stuck his hand out in a fake microphone gesture and flashed me one his huge smiles. “Come on Kates, this is your solo chorus.” I cleared my throat and tried to keep up. 

“Something, something Lyyyylaaa,” I sang through my laughter. He flicked his hair out of his eyes and looked over at me with a serious look. 

“I can’t wait to marry you.”

“You think we’re gonna get married?”

“Of course. After I make millions playing guitar and you’re a big fancy lawyer. We can build a mansion and have 4 kids.” 

He pulled into my driveway and turned in the seat to face me. I leaned forward and brought my lips close to his face as I whispered, “Oh, so now we’re having four kids? Easy for you to say when you’re not the one actually doing it.”

He tucked my hair behind my ears and leaned in even closer, “I would have as many kids as you want to, Katie,” he said as he pushed his lips onto mine. His hand was starting to slide up my shirt until the porch light flicked on. He jumped back and grinned at me across the car. 

“I think that light is your dad saying he doesn’t want me to have my way with you in his driveway.” 

I grabbed my bag and shoved him a little. “You’re so gross sometimes Jake,” I said while laughing. I started walking up my driveway when he yelled out the window.

“Hey Katie!”

I turned around and raised my eyebrow at him.

“I love you” 

I ran back to his car window and grabbed his face in my hands to give him one last kiss. 

“I love you too,” I said as we slowly pulled apart. “Always and forever. Even when you become a famous rock star and forget about me back here in Michigan.” 

He rolled his eyes at as he rolled his window up and reversed out of the driveway. He cranked the radio and started blasting Lyla as he drove down the street and screamed out one final time “I could never forget someone like you!”

When I got to the door, my dad was waiting with an amused expression on his face. “I don’t know if I should yell at him for bringing you back late or for waking up the entire neighborhood.” 

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Katie’s POV- October 2023

“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” I whispered to Grace as my parents suv pulled into the Kiszka’s gravel driveway. She glanced at the front seat where my parents were to make sure they weren’t listening.

“Ok, well Karen texted your mom and told her she invited us, so unless you want to tell your mom whyyyy you don’t want to go…” 

She’s right and I hate when she is. I sighed and turned around to look at Lyla in her car seat. The sparkly butterfly barrette was still perfectly placed in her hair and her lilac sweatshirt stain free. 

“Is this where the party is at mommy?” 

I smiled at her and tried to pretend I didn’t feel like I was about to throw up. 

“It sure is Ly, and remember you have to be on your best behavior while we’re here.”

She nodded at me and I knew she understood. She was always well behaved anyway. 

Lyla held my hand as we walked up to the front door. My heart was pounding as I thought of all the times I had been up this path. My mom barely had time to knock on the door before Karen swung it open. The parents all fawned over each other as Lyla patiently waited to go in. 

Our welcome was interrupted by a dog pushing past Karen and running out the door. 

“Rose stop!” 

Sam squeezed out the door and started chasing after her. Lyla let go of my hand and turned to run after her too. “Puppy!” Sam had caught up with Rose across the street, and Lyla was running straight over to pet her. I didn’t even have a chance to stop her before I saw the car coming fast down the road. Sam dropped Rose, and reached to pull Lyla out of the street at the last second. I couldn’t breathe even when I saw him pick her up and wipe away the tears that appeared on her face. She buried her head in his neck while he carried her back to the house. 

“It’s okay, you don’t have to cry. You just got scared. I was scared too.” He was still reassuring her as he walked over to me. He smiled at me and adjusted Lyla in his arms. 

“Hey Katie, I forgot you know how to make an entrance.” 

One of the things I always loved about Sam was his ability to make the worst situations fun. I tried to smile back, but I’m pretty sure it looked more like a grimace. I reached out to take Lyla from him, but she just tightened her grip on his neck. He laughed and swore he didn’t mind holding her until she wanted to get down. 

Everything had happened so fast that I forgot we were all still standing on their front porch. Karen ushered my parents and Grace inside to visit with all the other guests. She stuck her head out the door as she closed it, “I figured you guys need a minute. Just come in when you’re recovered.” She said it with a genuine smile like what just happened didn’t phase her at all. I guess after raising four kids, it probably didn’t. 

Lyla turned her head on Sam’s shoulder so she was looking at me with one eye. 

“I’m sorry mommy. I didn’t mean to run in the road.” 

I pushed the hair out of her face and leaned over. “It’s okay, I’m not mad. I know you were just excited about the puppy. But you always have to look both ways and ask mommy before you go in the street.”

She nodded her head up and down, closed her eyes and snuggled against Sam.

“Sorry, it’s her nap time and she gets really heavy when she sleeps. I should probably just get her in the car and take her home after all that excitement.”

Sam laughed as he held her with ease, “You guys can’t leave yet, you just got here. She can take a nap in my room.” I smiled at him and tried to look grateful for his suggestion, even though my plan for escaping without seeing Jake was just ruined. 

He bounced her up and down like he did this all the time. “Her name is Lyla, right?”

I nodded at him as I watched her relaxed breathing in his arms.

He shifted his eyes to look at her sleeping face. “Cute name for a cute kid.” He said as he led us up to the front door. 

The party had moved to the backyard, so we had the house to ourselves as we walked the familiar hall to the room he shared with Jake and Josh. When he opened the door, it’s like I was going back in time. Everything was exactly the same as I remembered it. Same bedspreads, posters on the walls and clothes hanging out of the closet. 

“It almost looks like we still live here,” Sam said with a laugh. “I guess we just thought we’d be right back, but we haven’t really had the chance.” He looked at the suitcase flung open on his bed and nodded at Jake’s. 

“We can put her on Jake’s bed and he still has Mr.Scruffy which I bet she’ll love.”

I looked at Jake’s pillow to see the worn out stuffed dog he was obsessed with as a kid. “No way this thing hasn’t disintegrated yet.” I said with a chuckle as I picked it up. “Isn’t it amazing?” Sam remarked as he gently placed Lyla on the bed. He slipped Mr.Scruffy into her open arms and then we backed out of the room.

We stood in the hallway in an uncomfortable silence for a moment before Sam cleared his throat and started speaking, “Jake hasn’t loved anyone the way he loved you.”

I looked at with a stunned expression on my face. “Sam…you just saved my daughter’s life and then the next thing you say after years of not seeing me is that?”

He smiled to himself before looking at me, “Well when you say it like that, I guess I could see how it came out. But I just had to tell you before we go outside and you see him,” he raised an eyebrow at me and leaned closer, ”unless of course you have a boyfriend. Maybe Lyla’s dad?”

I felt my cheeks turning red as I broke eye contact. “No, we’re not together.” 

To Sam’s credit, he tried to feign disappointment like that was the saddest news he ever heard. “Oh darn, I guess that means you’re available.” He said with a charming grin. He was so forward but that was just him. I couldn’t be mad. I was more impressed that he had to balls to outright say it. 

I rolled my eyes at him and looked at their family photos on the wall. There were some newer ones of that showed them on stage in front of huge crowds. Jake living his dreams. My stomach flipped at the thought of seeing him outside. 

“Hey- before we go out there, why don’t you show me some videos of what you guys play now?” I hoped he couldn’t hear the desperation in my voice. I was trying to stall the inevitable 

He let out a fake gasp with a look of shock.

“You mean to tell me that you haven’t been keeping up with our career? I can’t believe this.” 

“I know it’s so rude of me. I just hope you’re better than the garage days at this point.” 

He slipped his phone out of his pocket and headed back towards the living room. 

“Come on, I’ll let you be the judge.”

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

 Jake’s POV- October 2023

I was helping my dad with the fire when i saw her. Not to sound cliche, but I felt everything slow down and time stand still. She was laughing at something Sam said with a real genuine smile, unlike the string of influencer wannabes I’d been hanging out with. Her long brown hair was flying around in the wind and she wasn’t worried about trying to fix it. Those might even be the same beat up Converse she had five years ago. 

Sam pointed at me and she shifted her eyes to meet mine. I was hoping that maybe she missed me too, but the anger and hurt shining in her eyes was apparent. Why is she still mad at me after 5 years? 

“Katie!” My dad yelled over my shoulder.

She broke eye contact with me and her face immediately lit up with a huge smile. She walked over and gave him a hug while avoiding me.

“I forgot how fun your parties always are.”

My dad smiled at her as he looked around at all of our friends in their backyard. 

“They’re always more fun when you’re here. We’ve missed having you around.”

She glanced over at me while taking a sip of her drink. “I’ve missed you guys too. Are Josh and Ronnie around? They’re the only ones I haven’t gotten to talk to yet.” 

I let out a snort and she raised an eyebrow at me. My dad looked between us and cleared his throat. “I’ll let you two catch up,” he said as he walked over to his friends.

We stared at each other like two strangers meeting for the first time. Like we didn’t discover every inch of each other together in the house behind us. I tried to catch her green eyes, but she just looked away. 

“So you don’t have anything to say?” I asked while fidgeting with the bracelet on my wrist. 

She opened her mouth to speak right when Josh ran over. He grabbed her around the waist and lifted her up while she screamed and spilled her drink. 

“God, I missed you” he shouted while spinning her around. 

“Ok, ok I missed you too! Just put me down” she said while laughing. When her feet were back on the ground, they launched into an animated conversation while I stood by awkwardly intruding. 

“Mommy!” I looked up to see Grace walking over with a miniature version of Katie. 

Katie beamed at her and crouched down to her level. “Did you have a good nap?” 

She nodded excitedly and looked up to Josh and I. Katie picked her up and faced Josh and Grace. Leaving me out again. 

“This is Lyla,” she said to Josh. He reached out to shake her hand while she giggled at him. He’s always been good at making kids like him. 

“Lyla, huh?” I said to Katie’s back. She turned around and looked at me with a blank expression. 

“My daddy picked it!” Lyla said to me. I grinned at her and looked at the stuffed dog in her hands. “Did you find that inside?” I asked. She nodded her head and her brown curls bounced around.

 “Sam gave it to her to nap with, but I’ll put it back.” Katie said as she reached to take it from her. Lyla looked disappointed and I felt an urge to make her happy. 

“That’s alright, she can keep it.” I said. Her little brown eyes lit up and she squealed out a thank you to me. 

Katie opened her mouth to say something, but we were interrupted yet again. 

“We’ll aren’t you just the cutest thing I’ve ever seen!” My mom said as she walked up to Katie and Lyla. The universe just doesn’t want me and Katie to speak I guess. I wandered back towards the house and pulled my phone out of my pocket to see a new text from Sam.

Katie doesn’t have a boyfriend 😏 

I looked over at my family talking to her like no time had passed at all while I replayed our brief interaction in my mind. They wouldn’t be trying so hard if they knew what happened between us. 

—————

“Well that was fun.” Josh said as he flopped back on his twin sized mattress. 

“Cheers to that.” Sam said as he walked into our old bedroom and jumped on his bed.

“Yeah, Katie’s kid is cute. Do we know who the dad is?” Josh said while he chugged the last of his beer. 

“No, but I bet you’re drunk enough to text her and ask right now.” Sam replied with a grin that he knew would egg Josh on.

Josh, never one to turn down a bet, smirked at Sam and picked his phone up. I groaned and decided to finally speak up. 

“Just leave her alone.” I said while rubbing my hands down my face.

“We’ve left her alone for 5 years because you asked us to and she was our friend too.” Josh said while scrolling his contacts for her name. 

I heard the phone ringing and rolled over on my bed to face the dark blue wall. 

“Just leave me out of whatever you’re doing.”

Sam let out a drunk giggle and sat next to Josh on his plaid comforter while they waited for her to answer.

“Josh?”

They both squealed like high school girls while trying to gain a little composure.

“Uhhh guys?” Katie said over their laughter. I smiled to  as I thought of all the times the four of us would hang out and they would mess around with her like this.

Sam grabbed the phone from Josh and started talking.

“Kates. Sorry about that. We just wanted to call and say we had a great time seeing you today and would love to hang out again tomorrow if you’re free.” 

“Oh well I don’t know what I’m doing yet…” 

Josh leaned over Sam and started yelling into the phone.

“Listen we don’t care about Jake and you know you had fun with us today.”

I rolled back over and raised an eyebrow at him and he waved me off without even looking up.

She let out a laugh at him insulting me and cleared her throat. “Well I guess we could go to lunch.”

“Great! Come over tomorrow and we’ll figure out where to go.”

Sam cleared his throat and looked at Josh expectantly. Josh nodded and started to speak again.

“Oh Katie? Can I ask you something.”

She paused for a minute before answering.

“Sure.”

“Well you know I think we used to be best friends so, you can tell us this and it won’t leave this room.”

“You’re drunk aren’t you?” I could hear the smile playing on her lips.

Sam started cracking up and Josh muted the phone to hit him.

“Perhaps I am. But more importantly, we would like to know who Lyla’s dad is so we can go speak to him. Just a friendly man to man conversation about the lack of presence in her life.” 

I decided to use her silence as a chance to interject. “I bet it’s that guy Michael she used to make us hang out with. You know the douche who couldn’t stop mentioning he was a Harvard legacy?” 

Sam started laughing again at my comment and Josh once again muted the call and hit him.

“Of course you still can’t help yourself from making comments about my friends. But no, you never met her dad. I hung out with him after we broke up and he decided to not be around. We’re fine without him.” 

Josh shifted on the bed uncomfortably as he finally started to sober up and realize this call was a bad idea. 

“Hey,” he said softly,” I’m sorry I asked. I didn’t mean anything by it, but we really do want to see you again.”

“I know. I’ll see you and Sam tomorrow.”

He hung up the phone and Sam came over and punched my arm.

“Ha she doesn’t want to see you, but she wants to see us.”

I rolled my eyes and turned back to the wall ignoring them. 

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Katie’s POV- October 2023

For the second time this week I’m standing on the Kiszka front porch. 

The door swung open and I was face to face with Jake. He looks good and he knows it. His hair is a little longer, his body a little more filled out. The dark jeans and black button down somehow made him even more attractive. We stared at each other for a moment until I cleared my throat and spoke.

“I’m just here to meet Josh and Sam”

“I know. They’re out with our parents but they should be back in a minute.”

He turned and walked into the house as I stood in the open doorway. He spoke up without turning back around, “I know you’re more accustomed to entering this house through my bedroom window, but feel free to use the door.”

My feet moved forward as I tried to hide the smile playing on my lips. I closed the door and turned to look at him sitting on the couch. 

“If memory serves, I only used the window a few times”

He looked me up and down and jerked his chin towards the other end of the couch and I sank into the familiar leather. The room was filled with uncomfortable silence as I sat next to the boy who used to know every part of me. I was letting my eyes wander every spot in the room to avoid his gaze when he spoke up. 

“Do you still hate me?”

I tried to fight the flush that was rising in my cheeks as I tried to think of an answer to the question I wasn’t prepared for. All I could come up with was another question back.

“What?”

He looked at me with the soft brown eyes that reminded me of the boy I fell in love with. The same eyes that I see in Lyla everyday. It almost made me forget about the douchey rockstar he grew up to be. 

“I know you probably weren’t expecting me to ask that, but after the way you looked at me yesterday…I think you still hate me.”

I sighed and looked at the ceiling. 

“It’s been years and we don’t need to rehash this. I don’t hate you. I barely think about you and I’m sure you haven’t thought about me at all.” I hope that sounded convincing to him. 

He broke into a slow grin that revealed his perfect teeth. 

“If you say so.”

He ran his hand through his hair and cleared his throat before meeting my eyes again.

“So tell me about Lyla.”

My heart started racing at the mention of our daughter. “Um well maybe I can just show you some videos of her…” I fumbled through my purse for my phone and started scrolling through my camera roll when a callused hand reached over and plucked it away from me. 

“I just wanna scroll your baby pictures. Maybe a nude or two. Whatever I come across” 

I rolled my eyes and accepted defeat. 

“Trust me, you won’t find any. It’s not like I have anyone to send them to.”

He ignored me and kept his eyes trained on my phone.

“She really is cute,” He said as he paused on a photo of her eating an ice cream cone. I felt my pulse quicken while he looked at the picture. Was he noticing the huge grin on her face that looked exactly like his? Or her eyes that matched Sam’s? “You know my mom couldn’t stop going on about her last night. Kept saying how cute she is and how one of us should give her grandchildren soon.” 

The pit in my stomach returned as I thought about how much his mom would love her if she knew the truth. 

He was still staring at the picture with a far away look when he started speaking quietly again. “So you really never think about how-“ 

His sentence was cut off by the front door swinging open and the rush of activity as his family entered. I cut him a look that I hoped conveyed that he should shut up and not finish that sentence. 

We both stood up to greet them as I grabbed my bag and headed towards his brothers. He put his hand on my shoulder and I felt a million lighting bolts jolt through my body. He pulled me into a hug and I lost the ability to breathe.

“It was really nice to see you again.” He whispered in my ear. I broke away from his embrace and gave him a shaky smile. I turned back towards the door as he called to my back. 

“Maybe now you can unblock me on Instagram.”

tag list: @fleetingjake @hollyco

[kiszka-jake]

Road Not Taken

Road not taken: A Jake Kiszka fan fic

Summary: Katie and Jake broke up right before he made it big, and she’s been keeping one big secret from him ever since.

Katie’s POV-October 2023

“Mommy?” 

I rolled over to see my daughter standing by the side of the bed.

“Will you tell me a story about my daddy again?”

I smiled at her and pulled the blanket back. She giggled as she took a running leap onto the bed and snuggled in next to me. 

“If your daddy was here right now, he would be having so much fun teaching you how to ride your bike without training wheels. And he would definitely teach you how to play guitar” 

She looked wistfully up at me with her big brown eyes and a part of my heart broke. She loves when I tell her things about her dad, but she hates hearing what she’s missing out on. 

“Do you think he’ll be done with his secret mission soon and come home?”

I stared at the ceiling while she waited for my answer. I know I shouldn’t lie to her, but she’s only four. It’s better to tell a four year old that her dad’s a secret agent than it is to tell her the truth. I finally mustered up a smile and looked back down at her.

“Maybe! But you know he’s traveling to a lot of places on his current assignment.”

She seemed satisfied with my answer as her eyes started to close. I ran my fingers through her brown curls and picked up my phone to see a call from my best friend Grace. 

She didn’t even wait for me to say hello before she started speaking.

“The new Greta tour is sold out. I know I’ve been telling you this for years, but that money is Lyla’s too and I know you don’t let anyone help you but it-“

I had to cut her off or she would go on forever. Lyla’s dad and his money (and my lack thereof) is one of her favorite topics. 

“Gracie. Do you really think I’m going to call him up after not speaking for five years and just say ‘Hey Jake. Crazy story. You actually have a daughter and she really wants ballet lessons and a puppy, but I’m broke and can’t give her everything she wants. Mind sending some of your rockstar money this way?’ I don’t think that would go over well.”

She let out a long sigh and took a moment to reply. 

“I know, I know, I know. I only say it because I love you and Lyla and I want the best for both of you.”

“I know.”

We let the comfortable silence fill the air as we lingered on the call. Sometimes it’s just nice to know your best friend is there and ready to listen. 

“I really just wanted to call and say I’m excited to see you guys tomorrow.” 

I couldn’t hold back the smile growing on my face as I spoke. 

“I can’t wait to be back home either. Lyla can’t stop talking about going to Bronners again. I don’t know why she likes it so much.” 

“And her Auntie Gracie will gladly walk around the whole store and let her pick out whatever she wants for her birthday. 

We hung up the phone and it was just me alone with my thoughts. Going back to Frakenmuth always fills me with anxiety. I’ll forever be known as ‘the girl who broke up with a rockstar and got pregnant by a rando and dropped out of Harvard’. Quite a title to live up to…especially when it’s not the truth. 

I turned and watched Lyla sleep. She reminds me of him so much. They have the same eyes and the same big smile that is only reserved for the most special moments. As I started to fall asleep, all I could think about was all the memories waiting for me in Michigan.

———————————————————

“Mommy I see grandma and grandpa and Aunt Gracie!” Lyla shouted as we walked out of the airport. I looked ahead to see them excitedly waving and I let go of her hand to let her run ahead. 

My dad spun her around and put her on his shoulders while my mom yelled at him to be careful. “There’s my birthday girl!” My dad yelled as he reached a hand up to tickle her. Lyla laughed and put her arms around his neck. 

“It’s not my birthday today, Grandpa.” She said between her giggles. 

“Gosh sorry Ly. I thought you looked 5 years old already.” 

“You know, ever since Lyla was born you guys never get excited to see me anymore.” I joked as I hugged my mom. “You’re just old news now.” My mom said in reply. I felt my anxiety fade as I watched the happiness on Lyla’s face grow. I had every right to be here. This is my home too, and I have nothing to be scared of. Jake should be off somewhere getting ready for tour. 

“I did tell Lyla if she was good the whole flight you guys would take her for ice cream.” My dad smirked at me, “she could’ve been horrible and we would take her anyway.” I started walking away with Grace and turned around to wave. “We’ll meet you back home soon!” Lyla didn’t even say goodbye because she was too busy soaking up attention from her favorite people. 

Grace raised an eyebrow at me as she unlocked the car,” Kroger stop for cookies?”

“You have to ask?”

We blasted the radio on the way to the store  and it was like we were 16 again. I was still riding my child free high in the cookie aisle when it came crashing down.

“Katie?” 

I instantly recognized the voice. How could I not? It was the voice of the woman that was basically my second mother for years. I slowly turned around and smiled at Jake’s mom. The anxiety was back as I looked into the eyes of the kindest woman, who doesn’t know she has a granddaughter that would absolutely adore her. 

“Hi Mrs. kiszka, how are you?” Gracie glanced at me, probably wondering why I was being so formal after all these years. 

She scoffed at me while saying “you know it’s just Karen to you.” 

“Of course” I smiled awkwardly.

“We’ve missed seeing you around here. Last time I saw your mom she said you were still in Boston?” 

She was smiling at me so warmly, and I felt my cheeks getting red at the thought of this woman I respected hearing all the gossip about me. 

I laughed a little as I began “yeah, I had to drop out of college but I’m still in Boston with my daughter.” 

Her smile still didn’t waver as she reached out for my hand. “She did spend most of the conversation gushing about your daughter. She sounds like a great little girl.” 

I started to smile too, “Her name is Lyla. She’s turning 5 this week and she really is amazing. I’m still planning on going back to school, I just haven’t had the time.” 

Grace could tell I was still a little nervous, and interjected. “Yeah, Katie is the best mom. Too bad Lyla’s dad is a POS or she could’ve graduated by now.” 

Karen let out one of her signature booming laughs right in the middle of Kroger. I gave Gracie a side eye, but was also silently grateful for her boldness. 

“Yeah he was just a typical Harvard douche.” I said. Karen gave me a sympathetic look as she let go of my hand. 

“I’m sorry I never reached out to you when she was born. We were all just so busy with the band picking up and then life got in the way. The boys are in town this week for a visit and we’re going to have a little get together. You should come and bring Lyla. We would all love to meet her.”

I felt like I couldn’t breathe at the mention of the boys being here at the same time as me. 

“Aren’t they on tour?” Was all I managed to get out.

“Not yet.” She titled her head a little and came closer. “Whatever happened between you and Jake years ago is between the two of you, but you know you’ll always be another daughter to me and I would love to reconnect. We all would.” 

I couldn’t let her take all the blame for our distance. I would’ve ignored her if she had reached out. “I’m sorry for ghosting all of you too. Our relationship meant a lot to me and it was separate from Jake. You know I’ve always loved your family.”

We hugged each other again as she started talking. “So come tomorrow and we can start over.” 

“We will if we’re free”

She seemed satisfied with my answer as she turned to keep walking down the aisle.

We stood there in silence until she moved and Grace kept her eyes on me. 

“I don’t want Jake to meet Lyla.” I whispered as I tightened my grip on the cookies in my hand. 

She took the cookies from my hands and looked me in the eyes.

“He already knows she exists and he’s a self absorbed douche now so he won’t put it together.  It’ll be okay.”

————————————-

Jake’s POV-October 2023

I came up from the basement to see my mom bringing in the grocery bags. 

“Did you get everything we need for tomorrow?”

She was smiling at me like she had a secret. She put the hamburger buns away and ignored my question. 

“Is that a yes or a no?”

She turned around with a chip bag in her hands and beamed at me.

“Guess who I saw at Kroger”

I sighed as I tried to think of an answer. I hated playing this game when it could be anyone from the town.

“I don’t know maybe Susan that used to cut our hair when we were 5?”

She rolled her eyes at me as she put the chips away. 

“No, I saw Katie and Grace. Katie’s in town visiting her parents with her daughter. I invited them to come tomorrow.”

My head snapped up at the mention of Katie coming over tomorrow.

“Why would you do that?” 

She turned her head and squinted her eyes at me.

She began to speak slowly “You know..Katie had a similar reaction when I invited her. Are you ever going to tell us what happened between you two? You were always so cute together.”

I grabbed a banana from the Kroger bags and took a bite to avoid answering. She wasn’t letting me get away without an answer though. She stood and waited for me to finish chewing. 

“That’s private information” 

——————————-

Katie’s POV-October 2018

“It hurts so bad Mom.” I groaned while squeezing her hand. My mom pushed my sweaty hair back with her free hand and smiled down at me. 

“I know it does. But it’ll be over soon and you’ll have a beautiful baby.” 

The pain passed again as my dad walked through the door. I could tell he was still uncomfortable with the whole situation and couldn’t believe this was happening. He cleared his throat while he stared at my stomach.

“Are you sure you don’t want us to call the dad? We don’t care who it is, but he should be here with you.”

“David.” My mom said disapprovingly. “Is now really the time for this discussion again?” 

I couldn’t meet my parents eyes as I prepared myself to lie to them again.

“I told you, it’s just some random guy I met in class that I went out with a few times. He’s not interested in being a dad right now.” 

My dad was silent as he stared out the window. He was so proud of me when I got accepted into Harvard, and ever since I told him I was pregnant and dropping out, he’s been quiet. 

The door suddenly burst open as Grace ran in the room. “I’m here, I’m here!” She yelled while yanking her suitcase through the doorway. She was panting as she looked around the room at all of us.

“Glad to see you’re still ginormous. Guess that means I haven’t missed the birth of my niece.”

“Or nephew.” I replied with a laugh. 

“No it’s definitely a girl. She and I already have a connection so I just know.”

My mom smiled as she embraced Grace in a tight hug and turned to me. 

“I still can’t believe you didn’t want to know the gender.” 

Grace gave me a glance and I half smiled at my mom.

“I like surprises” I said in reply.

I actually hate surprises. I didn’t find out because Jake always said he wanted to be surprised like his parents were for him and his siblings. 

Gracie gave my hand a reassuring squeeze as she read my mind. She’s the only person on the planet that knows Jake’s the dad. 

After a few more hours, the doctor said it was finally time to push. My dad went outside to wait and my mom and Grace stood on either side of me.

I heard the crying first and then I heard Grace screaming it’s a girl. The nurse placed her on my chest and I looked down at the most beautiful thing I ever created. I felt an insane amount of love and peace while I held her little hand. She was always meant to be mine, and I was meant to be hers. 

——————— 

Later that night when everyone left, it was just me and her alone for the first time. 

“I’m your mom” I whispered to her in the dark. I watched her little chest rise and fall as she snuggled against me. “I don’t know how we’re going to do this, but I promise you’ll alway be happy.”

A nurse opened the door and stuck her head in. “Just wanted to make sure you guys are good in here.” 

I nodded at her as I started to hear the music that was playing in the hallway. I would know that voice anywhere considering I heard it everyday for years. 

She was turning to leave when I asked.

“Excuse me, do you know what song this is?” 

She looked excited as she turned back around to tell me. 

“The new Greta Van Fleet album came out today and it’s all we’ve been listening to. This one is called You’re The One. Have you ever heard of them?”

“No, I don’t think I have.” 

“You should check them out sometime, they’re really great.” She said as she pulled the door closed.

I looked down at the baby sleeping peacefully in my arms. “You were born on your daddy’s album release day.” 

Jake’s POV-October 2018

“Jake hurry up and get ready.” I looked up to see Josh in the doorway. I stood up, grabbed my drink and downed it in two seconds. He gave me a look and I knew what he was thinking. 

“Come on man. We’re certified rockstars now. This is what we do. Sex, drugs and rock n roll, right?” 

He kept staring at me as he answered. “Yeah, but I don’t want you to forget why you wanted to do this in the first place. Ever since you and Katie broke up you’ve been like this.”

“You gotta stop bringing her up.”

Every time someone mentioned her name, I felt like I needed a drink. Maybe I have needed more drinks this year, but she broke me. That’s what she does to people. 

We headed to the side stage and waited while we were being introduced to the crowd. It’s our album release party, I need to focus. We just need to do the Q&A and preform a few songs and then I can have another drink. 

One of the production assistants that was at our ep release walked by and stopped to talk.

“Congrats on the album, it’s awesome.”

I muttered a thank you as I shook his hand. 

“Is your girlfriend here for this one too? I can get her a good spot again.”

I mentally rolled my eyes and tried to not let my annoyance show. 

“She’s not here man, but thank you.”

I can’t escape that girl today. 

The crowd started screaming as we walked onto the stage. I sat next to josh and let him take over answering the fan questions while I nodded and laughed when it was needed. 

“Jake?” 

I snapped my head up to Sam looking at me expectantly. A girl in the crowd cleared her throat and spoke into the microphone again.  

“Sam just said you wrote most of You’re The One, so I was just wondering who it’s about” she was blushing and twirling her hair around while she stared at me. 

I made myself laugh a little before I began, “I suppose it can be about whoever you want it to be, but I wouldn’t say it was written with anyone in mind. Just a general feeling of longing.” 

That was a lie. It was written for and about one person. I heard the other questions being asked, but all I could think about was her. Her long brown hair that she always begged me to braid, the way she covered her mouth to laugh when Josh said something stupid, her green eyes filled with so much joy when she watched me on stage. The crowd cheered again as we started to get up to play. I walked over to my guitar and felt a peace when my fingers touched the strings. This guitar was always meant to be mine, and I was always meant for this. 

I looked out into the crowd and spotted the girl that asked me a question. I smiled shyly at her and figured I could find her at the after party. I’m not going to let Katie ruin this night for me too. It's not everyday you get to release an album. 

HI! I started to post this story awhile ago and got busy with life. I have the first 5 chapters ready to go, so I thought I would start posting again :)