kittenwatchesthings

[kittenwatchesthings]

Geostorm Liveblog

It’s been a hot minute ( many many hot minutes, actually) since I liveblogged here, and that’s because The Core fucked me up so bad that I still haven’t finished it. Yeah. That was a year ago (or longer, because I picked a theme that doesn’t timstamp my posts). I got as far as the geode and noped the fuck out, but to this day I am still pondering the velocity and force needed for a pigeon to break windows. Just saying.

Anyways, it’s Superbowl Sunday and I could care less and Redbox had a deal so I picked up Geostorm. I will tell you how much I know about this movie.

Gerard Butler is in it.

Gerard Butler controls the satellites that control the weather.

The satellites get fucked up.

They fuck shit up.

There are giant tsunamis.

I think there were like six tornadoes in NYC or something IDK I watched the trailer months ago.

I think he has a daughter because they always have daughters in disaster movies right?

Let’s get started.

This movie is rated PG-13 for destruction and violence.

Annnnnd we start with the child voiceover because Drama™. Climate change!

Actual quote: “They called it extreme weather. They didn’t know what extreme is.”

(I am not even 30 seconds in this is gonna be great.)

Okay I’m now like a minute in and I have two things to say.

1. These are excellent videos of natural disasters 2. I hope they got permission for the videos

So they’re essentially using explosives to control the weather. Yup. That’s totally gonna work. And they called it Dutch Boy. Yeah. Great.

Ohhhh Gerard is gonna be snarky to the senators. Nice. I like him.

The senator is clearly gonna be the bad guy in this movie. I can’t wait for him to die.

Also Gerard is not really aging very well. He still looks good just not as good as 2005 Gerard.

His brother is clearly a politician because he’s all “you fucked up and I gotta fire you” but at least he kinda cried about it too.

Anyways we’re headed to the desert where shit is about go down I can just feel it.

Who the fuck came up with this

Oh there’s a town completely frozen over OH his hand came off well shit

THE PRESIDENT ONLY CARES ABOUT HIMSELF

Little brother has redeemed himself by caring more about the 300 people in the village that froze to death

fuck you, Mr President

Ed Harris knows what’s up. He says get Gerard up on that space station

meanwhile, in space, a foreign guy (of course, because America is full of racists) is stealing information, and does every single country have its own satellite? even Djibouti? that seems excessive to me.

Nevermind the guy is dead. I 100% thought he was doing normal shit until he stuck the… uh… datapen? whatever. until he stuck it into the binder all sneaky-like. Not entirely sure wtf just happened on the ISS but we’ve just cut to the country where Gerard’s daughter is brainy and fixing something all by herself.

Awww her name is Hannah I have a sister named Hannah

oh now the brothers are fighting

guilt trippingggg

Ohhhhh so there’s another guy on the ISS fucking shit up. I bet he made the airlock open to kill Makmoud. Why the fuck people gotta fuck shit up?

(The answer is that people are fucking awful)

no wait I lied this guy is on Earth, in China, where it is very hot

CAT THERE IS A CAT IT IS PURRING STOP EVERYTHING

Oh um the ground is so hot you can fry eggs on it WHY IS THE PIPE RED HOT OH LOOK AN EXPLOSION

FIRENADO ALERT

what the actual fuck is going on

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

okay I’mma try and wrap my head around this… it got so hot that the gas pipelines turned red hot, overheated, exploded everywhere, and toppled buildings

1. NOT PLAUSIBLE 2. Pipes run at least 3 feet underground which is not gonna get that fucking hot and I’m pretty sure the gas would expand and destroy the lines before they actually get red hot 3. Whether actual fire explosions (and not superheated gas) happen would be up to whether there are sparks or not

okay so it was indeed gas main explosions, thank you Hannah for explaining

still doesn’t excuse the TERRIBLE SCIENCE

Hannah is a smart cookie I like her

still using fucking space shuttles I see and he’s not even in a space suit what kind of space movie is this (okay he’s kind of in a space suit but really)

can u not with the dizzying space images? I’m still fucked up from Gravity

THE Jake Lawson

Also Gerard’s American accent is riddled with Scottish which is likely why he just said he was born in the UK (I like the Scots better than the American anyway roll those r’s baby)

Okay anyway apparently the satellites are getting fucked up by someone IN THE WHITE HOUSE how surprising is that (not at all)

SOMEBODY’S COME TO FUCK WITH CHENG

THE BROTHERS ARE FIGHTING AGAIN

THIS IS NOT THE DRAMA I SIGNED UP FOR

AHHH THERE IS THE DRAMA

I suspect Dassite(?) has something to do with this. But I am worried something’s gonna go wrong on this spacewalk.

SOMEBODY FUCKED WITH JAKE’S SUIT

DAMMIT I SAID NO MORE DIZZYING SPACE SHIT I’M STILL FUCKED UP FROM GRAVITY

FUCK CHENG NO

Really we need this brotherly–ohhhhh it’s a fucking coded message hell yeah Jake

FUCK NOT THE GIRLFRIEND

oh okay Dana is my fave

OMG the girlfriend’s name is Sarah helllll yeah

Ohhhhh Makmoud I am sorry for thinking you were bad you were being good! It is clearly the Americans fucking all of this up

DUSSETTE IS GOOD TOO I’M SORRY FOR DOUBTING YOU BOTH

SHIT they weaponized it everything’s fucked up

THE PRESIDENT FUCKED THIS SHIT UP

Max is gonna fuck this up I just know it

FUCK NOT TOKYO

oh hey the giant hailstones from the trailer holy fuck they are huge

what the fuck ice in Brazil

BIRDS FALLING DEAD FROM THE SKY INCLUDING A PLANE

ONE HOUR AND THIRTY MINUTES TO GEOSTORM

FUCK ed harris is onto max

WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS THE STATION SELF DESTRUCTING

WHO FUCKED IT UP

IT WAS DUNCAN

SHIT SON FUCK HIM UP JAKE

of fucking course Ed Harris is the one behind it he’s the best at being bad

but why is it the DNC why are they democrats why are the dems the bad ones

SARAH IS BEST AT LYING

GO SARAH GO

THERE’S THE TORNADOES

So lightning just blew up the arena where the DNC was being held and I’m having flashbacks to The Core when a lightning storm fucked up Rome and exploded the Coliseum so THANKS Geostorm

Annnnd Russia is melting and the Prez is skeptical (of course)

FUCK the shithole guy survived

SARAH IS THE BEST

EY NOW HE DEAD

Noooo poor Hannah

SHIT JAKE NO

lol Max and Sarah have you beat fucking Ed Harris

fucking deck him Mr President

HELL YEAH MAX

Anyways, tsunami in Dubai. GIANT FUCKING TSUNAMI. Definitely bigger than fucking San Andreas

NO JAKE CAN’T DIE

HE’S THE FUCKING HERO

THAT WAS THE MOST STRESSFUL FIVE MINUTES I CAN REMEMBER

oh no Ute is gonna die isn’t she

wait she’s still going

okay they’re in the satellite that should be okay right

HERNANDEZ

yay happy ending

Okay so um.

Final thoughts: I got way too emotionally invested in the movie but at this moment (despite what some conspiracy theorists believe) we CANNOT control the weather satellites. We do not yet have this capability and I fully believe that we will not have it by 2019 or even 2025, especially if the US government and public opinion stay as they are right now. This movie was likely based on conspiracy theories surrounding HAARP, which I won’t get into, but it’s safe to say that we can’t control the fucking weather and we’re not going to for a long time.

So uh… nice concept, nice drama, the science fucking sucked. Definitely sci-fi rather than actually fucking plausible. The end.

Science 0/5 Plot 5/5 because fuck this movie Special effects 4/5 because some of the scenes in the space suits looked kinda fake but the rest was A+

[kittenwatchesthings]

EMERGENCY PREPAREDNESS TIPS (AS GLEANED FROM DISASTER MOVIES)

-The dog never dies. If you want to be safe, always stay where the dog is.

-Don’t go on the Golden Gate Bridge. Like, ever. 

-If you hear a snarling sound from behind you, it is likely not an animal. It is more likely a backdraft/giant wave/tornado.

-Move to a city without any famous landmarks. Maybe like Boise, Idaho. 

-If a scientist says you should be worried, be worried…no matter how unscientific his theory sounds.

-Be a kid. If you’re not a kid…sorry for you.

-Don’t drive a black car. They’re tornado magnets.

-If you’re not touching the fire/lava/pyroclastic flow, you can’t get hurt.

-Form an alliance with “everyman” folk.

-Get your parents divorced. If they’re divorced, you’re more likely the protagonist of the story.

-Drop your B-list acting job. B-actors are a favorite food of gaping fault lines.

-You can always outrun an explosion.

Your Emergency Kit Should Contain:

1 Dwayne Johnson

1 suit of plot armor

No food or water. It’ll just get stolen by the deranged masses.

Several pairs of running shoes. Or heels. Or flats. You know as long as your shoes look good they’ll do.

Makeup. Because who wants to live through the apocalypse and not look photogenic?

Oil drilling equipment. You know, for asteroids.

A cell phone. Don’t worry. It will still work when everything’s gone to shit.

A locket or other memento from your (hopefully) divorced parents.

A dramatic soundtrack for those “Oh Hell No!” moments

Pocket book of vaguely science-y sounding words

WHATEVER YOU DO…DO NOT GET ANY CORPORATE SPONSORS.

[kittenwatchesthings]

The Core Liveblog 3/?

OH MY GOD THEY ARE EXITING THE DRILL.  HOW IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE CAN THOSE SUITS HANDLE THE HEAT AND PRESSURE?!

Y’ALL I AM NOT SURE I CAN FINISH THIS TONIGHT.

SO THEY JUST PANNED OUT TO THIS GLITTERING EXPANSE OF DARKNESS AND ALL I CAN SAY IS

WHAT THE FUCK?  WHAT THE FUCK?  WHAT THE FUCK?!

“I think it’s a geode. But I don;t understand how it could have survived down here”

WITCHCRAFT PROBABLY BECAUSE THERE’S NO WAY THAT HAPPENED NATURALLY WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK Y’ALL

“look! it’s an amethyst!”

“we’ve breached the shell!”

CASCADE OF MOLTEN ROCK

WHAT IS THIS MOVIE

HOW DID YOU CONVINCE ME TO WATCH THIS TRAVESTY

COMPARED TO THIS SAN ANDREAS WAS AMAZING

I NEED ALCOHOL

[kittenwatchesthings]

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE CRYSTALS AT THAT PRESSURE AND DEPTH

PERFECTLY FORMED FUCKING CRYSTALS

THEY SHOULD BE A MOLTEN MUSH

A CRYSTAL MUSH

I’M SO ANGRY

AND NOW THEY’RE TRAPPED

The Core Liveblog 2/?

So it’s been very nearly six weeks since I stopped 45 minutes into the travesty that is The Core, and as the semester is finally winding down it’s time to finally finish this movie.

Last time we were here, Hilary Swank had fixed Aaron Eckhart’s machine thingy.

I went back to 40 minutes in and

“yes yes yes and what if the core is made of cheese”

listen here mate buddy old friend I wanted to punch you in the face six weeks ago and I still want to punch you in the face now so I hope someone does it.  I’m designating you as the bad guy of this disaster movie and therefore you have to die.

Okay hang on this drill thing has compartments and if one is damaged it gets ejected.

If one in the middle gets damaged does that mean everything further back gets ejected?  THIS MAKES NO SENSE.

OH NO severe static storm and ROME DOES NOT LOOK GOOD

(Did Rome ever look good?  I’m asking for a friend.)

I love how everyone just stands and stares like “oooh look clouds” instead of “this thunderstorm came out of nowhere hmmm I should get inside” and screaming and lightning in 3…2…1…

what the actual fuck

like okay I understand that the Romans built the coliseum with concrete and iron clamps but that does not mean that it naturally attracts All the Lightning

(I paused for several minutes because I was positive that the Romans had used iron rods similar to how we use rebar today and I have thus learned that they used fucking travertine to build this huge ass amphitheatre like… travertine?  Really?  Apparently it’s a decent building stone but I personally would much rather a nice sandstone or marble or granite.)

ANYWAYS people are getting electrocuted and shit and I am already So Done™ with this fucking movie

[kittenwatchesthings]

These special effects are terrible.  Like, terrible.  This movie is from the aughts and fucking Twister had better special effects. 

The coliseum just exploded I can’t... I can’t do this.

EVERYTHING IS EXPLODING WHY THIS MAKES NO SENSE

Hang on I need to walk away for a minute y’all

Oh no Rome is on fire

“let’s get this ship in the ground... now”

I have to argue with the assertion that the Marianas Trench is in the South Pacific.  I’ve always considered it the western Pacific.

The Mariana Trench or Marianas Trench[1] is the deepest part of the world's oceans. It is located in the western Pacific Ocean, to the east of the Mariana Islands. 

Thanks Wikipedia!!!

It’s called Virgil.  They named the ship Virgil.

Down down down to the depths they go.  Into the mouth of hell.  Forward the light brigade--wait.

UNDERWATER EARTHQUAKE

Footage of rocks breaking apart and a mysterious light!

EARTHQUAKES DON’T WORK THAT WAY

They’re only at four thousand feet!!! WHY ARE ROCKS FALLING THEY’RE NOT EVEN IN THE FUCKING TRENCH YET

It reaches a maximum-known depth of 10,994 m (± 40 m) or 6.831 mi (36,070 ± 131 ft)

Thanks Wikipedia!

“I chose it because the crust is thinner” Well.  In a manner of speaking. “but the drawback is seismic activity”

Because I love y’all I went and checked USGS’s global earthquake map to see if this made sense.  And it kind of does?  But it also kind of doesn’t.

Here are earthquakes of all magnitudes in the past seven days

And here are earthquakes of magnitude 2.5+ for the past thirty days, zoomed in to the trench for clarity

Note how there are several earthquakes within a couple days of each other, all less than magnitude 6.  But none for over a week and a half!

Okay so anyway on with the movie it actually got tense for a moment!  I was scared!

But do not worry friends, I am angry again.

“I never taught the computer how to read empty space!” “I never taught Virgil how to fly!”

I’m laughing because y’all the mantle is basically solid.  It’s the consistency of silly putty.  HOW THE FLYING FUCK DO YOU HAVE EMPTY SPACE

The Core Liveblog 2/?

So it’s been very nearly six weeks since I stopped 45 minutes into the travesty that is The Core, and as the semester is finally winding down it’s time to finally finish this movie.

Last time we were here, Hilary Swank had fixed Aaron Eckhart’s machine thingy.

I went back to 40 minutes in and

“yes yes yes and what if the core is made of cheese”

listen here mate buddy old friend I wanted to punch you in the face six weeks ago and I still want to punch you in the face now so I hope someone does it.  I’m designating you as the bad guy of this disaster movie and therefore you have to die.

Okay hang on this drill thing has compartments and if one is damaged it gets ejected.

If one in the middle gets damaged does that mean everything further back gets ejected?  THIS MAKES NO SENSE.

OH NO severe static storm and ROME DOES NOT LOOK GOOD

(Did Rome ever look good?  I’m asking for a friend.)

I love how everyone just stands and stares like “oooh look clouds” instead of “this thunderstorm came out of nowhere hmmm I should get inside” and screaming and lightning in 3…2…1…

what the actual fuck

like okay I understand that the Romans built the coliseum with concrete and iron clamps but that does not mean that it naturally attracts All the Lightning

(I paused for several minutes because I was positive that the Romans had used iron rods similar to how we use rebar today and I have thus learned that they used fucking travertine to build this huge ass amphitheatre like… travertine?  Really?  Apparently it’s a decent building stone but I personally would much rather a nice sandstone or marble or granite.)

ANYWAYS people are getting electrocuted and shit and I am already So Done™ with this fucking movie

[kittenwatchesthings]

The Core Liveblog 2/?

So it’s been very nearly six weeks since I stopped 45 minutes into the travesty that is The Core, and as the semester is finally winding down it’s time to finally finish this movie.

Last time we were here, Hilary Swank had fixed Aaron Eckhart’s machine thingy.

I went back to 40 minutes in and

“yes yes yes and what if the core is made of cheese”

listen here mate buddy old friend I wanted to punch you in the face six weeks ago and I still want to punch you in the face now so I hope someone does it.  I’m designating you as the bad guy of this disaster movie and therefore you have to die.

Okay hang on this drill thing has compartments and if one is damaged it gets ejected.

If one in the middle gets damaged does that mean everything further back gets ejected?  THIS MAKES NO SENSE.

OH NO severe static storm and ROME DOES NOT LOOK GOOD

(Did Rome ever look good?  I’m asking for a friend.)

I love how everyone just stands and stares like “oooh look clouds” instead of “this thunderstorm came out of nowhere hmmm I should get inside” and screaming and lightning in 3...2...1...

what the actual fuck

like okay I understand that the Romans built the coliseum with concrete and iron clamps but that does not mean that it naturally attracts All the Lightning

(I paused for several minutes because I was positive that the Romans had used iron rods similar to how we use rebar today and I have thus learned that they used fucking travertine to build this huge ass amphitheatre like... travertine?  Really?  Apparently it’s a decent building stone but I personally would much rather a nice sandstone or marble or granite.)

ANYWAYS people are getting electrocuted and shit and I am already So Done(TM) with this fucking movie

[kittenwatchesthings]

WHAT IS THIS MOVIE

WHY DO THEY HAVE A HACKER

“you want me to hack the planet?”

oh hey Hilary Swank isn’t in trouble but she’s joining the team

wow Zimsky has a top secret project called Destiny that MIGHT have stopped the core spinning? Military guy is suspicious.  I keep wanting to call military guy Talbot but that’s not who it is

ah yes montage of building

“what if the core is made of cheese” wow yeah because joking around will make everything better

voiceover montage I love these things

UNOBTANIUM

YAY TRAINING

“for the 22nd time in a row everyone on Earth is dead”

Hilary Swank (Becca) is kind of flirting with Dr Keyes

and fixing his thing

his machine

we are 45 minutes in and I am going to take a nap my head hurts

The Core Liveblog 1/?

Today on KittenWatchesThings, ~The Core~

Just the synopsis makes me wonder how they got big names like Hilary Swank into this movie (the answer is probably money lbr here, that’s why most people do things *looks askance at other terrible movies*)

The Core is the movie most joked about in the geology department of my university, and yet I have only seen bits and pieces.  NO MORE.  Today is the day we nuke the Earth.

No whiskey today, instead we’re doing cold medicine.  So without further ado, let us begin this probable travesty.

[kittenwatchesthings]

WHAT IS THIS MOVIE

WHY DO THEY HAVE A HACKER

“you want me to hack the planet?”

oh hey Hilary Swank isn’t in trouble but she’s joining the team

wow Zimsky has a top secret project called Destiny that MIGHT have stopped the core spinning? Military guy is suspicious.  I keep wanting to call military guy Talbot but that’s not who it is

ah yes montage of building

“what if the core is made of cheese” wow yeah because joking around will make everything better

voiceover montage I love these things

UNOBTANIUM

YAY TRAINING

“for the 22nd time in a row everyone on Earth is dead”

Hilary Swank (Becca) is kind of flirting with Dr Keyes

and fixing his thing

his machine

we are 45 minutes in

The Core Liveblog 1/?

Today on KittenWatchesThings, ~The Core~

Just the synopsis makes me wonder how they got big names like Hilary Swank into this movie (the answer is probably money lbr here, that’s why most people do things *looks askance at other terrible movies*)

The Core is the movie most joked about in the geology department of my university, and yet I have only seen bits and pieces.  NO MORE.  Today is the day we nuke the Earth.

No whiskey today, instead we’re doing cold medicine.  So without further ado, let us begin this probable travesty.

[kittenwatchesthings]

IN THREE MONTHS EVERYTHING GOES TO SHIT HOW DO WE FIX IT

well it’s obvious isn’t it

we nuke it

we always nuke it

why are nukes always the solution to our problems?

PRESSURE

PUSHING DOWN ON ME PUSHING DOWN ON YOU

“we can’t just go to the core” “yes, but... what if we could?”

Is that Adam Baldwin

let me tell y’all this movie would be 1000 times better with Jayne Cobb

what the actual fuck is going on sonic fucking waves???  Shooting a hole into rock?????

update the engine works and they have a ----

UNOBTANIUM AH YES THE JOKE OF EVERY GEOLOGY DEPARTMENT EVERYWHERE

The Core Liveblog 1/?

Today on KittenWatchesThings, ~The Core~

Just the synopsis makes me wonder how they got big names like Hilary Swank into this movie (the answer is probably money lbr here, that’s why most people do things *looks askance at other terrible movies*)

The Core is the movie most joked about in the geology department of my university, and yet I have only seen bits and pieces.  NO MORE.  Today is the day we nuke the Earth.

No whiskey today, instead we’re doing cold medicine.  So without further ado, let us begin this probable travesty.

[kittenwatchesthings]

Hilary Swank is waiting to see the military guy who wanted to make sure it wasn’t war

I hate to tell you military dude but it 100% is war the earth is kicking the humans off this mortal coil so long farewell auf wiedersehen good night

bonus points to me for almost spelling auf wiedersehen right on the first go

what the fuck do you mean destiny has caught up with you

oh look aurora as far south as DC

well Dr Reyes of course you skipped drunk you drank how many beers followed by how many shots

oh hey he’s wanted at the pentagon

“well we have no sense of humor... and we’re armed”

“why don’t you begin and I’ll fill in all the difficult bits” wow Dr Zimsky you sound like an ass I want to punch your bespectacled face

time to explain the electromagnetic field and also the core with a peach

THE CORE OF THE EARTH HAS STOPPED SPINNING AND WE DON’T KNOW WHY OH THE HUMANITY

(I am 25 minutes in. I hate this movie already.  I should have gone with the whisky.)

The Core Liveblog 1/?

Today on KittenWatchesThings, ~The Core~

Just the synopsis makes me wonder how they got big names like Hilary Swank into this movie (the answer is probably money lbr here, that’s why most people do things *looks askance at other terrible movies*)

The Core is the movie most joked about in the geology department of my university, and yet I have only seen bits and pieces.  NO MORE.  Today is the day we nuke the Earth.

No whiskey today, instead we’re doing cold medicine.  So without further ado, let us begin this probable travesty.

[kittenwatchesthings]

MASS BIRD SUICIDE

NOT IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN

at what point do birds fly with enough force to break glass?

especially fucking pigeons

Dr Keyes is determining that holy shit it’s magnetic shit making all this crazy stuff happen

...did he just say “internet do a search” oh no he said “hit the net, do a search”

“you can use our T1 line to look up sailor moon crap you can do this” are you fucking serious

dr keyes hopes he is wrong but the space shuttle says he is not

oh no

well that was a dramatic shuttle landing

the big scientist says “lol no way this isn’t happening” and dr keyes is like “okay well we’ll see” and the big scientist says “uhhhhh” and pulls out a big red folder gee I wonder what that could be

The Core Liveblog 1/?

Today on KittenWatchesThings, ~The Core~

Just the synopsis makes me wonder how they got big names like Hilary Swank into this movie (the answer is probably money lbr here, that’s why most people do things *looks askance at other terrible movies*)

The Core is the movie most joked about in the geology department of my university, and yet I have only seen bits and pieces.  NO MORE.  Today is the day we nuke the Earth.

No whiskey today, instead we’re doing cold medicine.  So without further ado, let us begin this probable travesty.

[kittenwatchesthings]

woooooow swirly purple and a festival oh boy

his watch has stopped!  Could this be.... foreshadowing

update it is because whoever that guy is, he just passed out (died?) in a conference room

and the world is falling to chaos outside

the fact that the core has stopped spinning this early into a two hour and fifteen minute movie does not bode well for my sanity.  WE ARE TWO MINUTES IN.

Sound waves!  panning over rocks! a lecture!  Bored-looking students!

“What’s going on” “We don’t know” “what do you mean” “Your security clearance is higher than ours” “I have security clearance?”

also I should add that Dr Keyes cannot play the trumpet my sister plays better trumpet

ooooh shady military place with eastern european (russian?) scientist

banter about marriage to make the scientists more human

why is the room full of dead bodies

oh that’s why

“okay it’s not war bye”

what the actual fuck

[kittenwatchesthings]

woooooow swirly purple and a festival oh boy

his watch has stopped!  Could this be.... foreshadowing

update it is because whoever that guy is, he just passed out (died?) in a conference room

and the world is falling to chaos outside

the fact that the core has stopped spinning this early into a two hour and fifteen minute movie does not bode well for my sanity.  WE ARE TWO MINUTES IN.

Sound waves!  panning over rocks! a lecture!  Bored-looking students!

“What’s going on” “We don’t know” “what do you mean” “Your security clearance is higher than ours” “I have security clearance?”

also I should add that Dr Keyes cannot play the trumpet my sister plays better trumpet

ooooh shady military place with eastern european (russian?) scientist

banter about marriage to make the scientists more human

why is the room full of dead bodies

oh that’s why

“okay it’s not war bye”

what the actual fuck

The Core Liveblog 1/?

Today on KittenWatchesThings, ~The Core~

Just the synopsis makes me wonder how they got big names like Hilary Swank into this movie (the answer is probably money lbr here, that’s why most people do things *looks askance at other terrible movies*)

The Core is the movie most joked about in the geology department of my university, and yet I have only seen bits and pieces.  NO MORE.  Today is the day we nuke the Earth.

No whiskey today, instead we’re doing cold medicine.  So without further ado, let us begin this probable travesty.

[kittenwatchesthings]

The Core Liveblog 1/?

Today on KittenWatchesThings, ~The Core~

Just the synopsis makes me wonder how they got big names like Hilary Swank into this movie (the answer is probably money lbr here, that’s why most people do things *looks askance at other terrible movies*)

The Core is the movie most joked about in the geology department of my university, and yet I have only seen bits and pieces.  NO MORE.  Today is the day we nuke the Earth.

No whiskey today, instead we’re doing cold medicine.  So without further ado, let us begin this probable travesty.

[kittenwatchesthings]

Funnily enough I actually thought about doing meteorology and have taken a couple classes on it. It is my second scientific passion.

Dante’s Peak Liveblog

Dante’s Peak is a movie I’ve watched several times, but I can’t recall ever watching it since I switched my major to geology.  So we’re going to have some fun, since I’ve already had one shot of whiskey… and now I’ve had two.

Keep reading

[kittenwatchesthings]

Oh man Volcano was terrible but at least his tires actually exploded when they hit lava! (You’re talking about the one with Tommy Lee Jones, right?)

I'll add it to the list!

Dante’s Peak Liveblog

Dante’s Peak is a movie I’ve watched several times, but I can’t recall ever watching it since I switched my major to geology.  So we’re going to have some fun, since I’ve already had one shot of whiskey… and now I’ve had two.

Keep reading

[kittenwatchesthings]

oh god please watch "The Core" it is my very favorite movie to watch as a geologist ever it is SO BAD (PSA: do not do any drinking games of any kind you will die and I am not responsible)

It's next on the list! I'm catching up with schoolwork this week so it may not be till Friday or Saturday that I watch it.